Nerd and the Marine (12 page)

She smiled at his happiness over the
kids calling him Uncle Mitch. She thought it appropriate to use
this nomenclature frequently, as he'd better get used to the idea.
Once he came home, he'd hear it about eighty times a day. Well,
maybe only ten, but ten was probably a lot when one hadn't grown up
hearing these things.

To:
[email protected]

From:
[email protected]

Subject: Uncle
Mitch

Hello Uncle
Mitch,

You know, I thought I
heard the kids christen you that, but thought it was my ears
playing tricks on me. I hope you don't mind about a hundred and
fifty kids calling you this? Often.

Usually at higher
frequencies and decibels than most human ears can stand. But
they're awfully cute and sweet. Most of the time. Kids have
meltdowns sometimes though, and that's when it's nice to have their
parents, Mom or Dad or Grandmom or Granddad around. ☺

You just pass the kid on
to the parents. Not unlike passing the baton to the next runner in
the Olympics, right? Only I don't think batons have meltdowns, but
anyway, you get the picture. Being an aunt or uncle is awesome.
Barely any responsibilities with most of the fun. It's
good.

Bentley is chasing
squirrels again. And, I'm sorry to say, but The Terror died the
other night. My great-aunt Tilly found him hard and cold when she
got back from Bible Study on Wednesday night. She didn't ask for an
autopsy to determine whether someone did him in or he died from
natural causes.

We have no idea how old he
was. He just showed up one day and was so dubbed The Terror by one
of the herd, (no one can remember who) after this child noticed the
cat climbing the curtains and then launching himself onto the
unsuspecting person who had the misfortune to sit in the chair he
had claimed. Claws out, of course. The Terror also, if you tried to
pet him, immediately put out his claws and wasn't bashful about
swiping. I think he had a thing for blood, because if there was the
possibility of him raising some, he did.

He loved climbing up pant
legs, or bare legs, and pantyhose were top of the line
entertainment for him. He had most of the neighborhood dogs cowed
because of those vicious claws. (I've never seen claws like
his.)

Bentley was one of the few
not daunted by The Terror. He seemed to think the ugly brown and
black cat would provide a tasty appetizer and after the nasty cat
figured out no one minded if Bentley ate him, learned to avoid your
dog. (Bentley is well loved for many reasons, The Terror being one
of them.)

I'm excited about Ben
coming to your base. I'm not sure why he's going there, as you've
mentioned there's not much water to be found, and I've always
figured SEALs need water, but what do I know?

Ben would tell you rather
quickly, not much. But what does he know? My brothers would all be
quick to assure you of my lack of understanding, too, so we won't
discuss them, okay? Since I'm writing this e-mail, I'll just stop
right there. Or here.

In case you hadn't
noticed, I'm feeling better. More alive. Although I'm told I don't
sound much better. Which I don't believe, as you can almost hear my
voice now. I don't sound like a pregnant moose anymore, so this is
good. At least, I think so. The aforementioned brothers really
enjoyed my voice, as it's given them even more fodder with which to
tease and harass me. I think they made up excuses to visit just so
they can hear me talk. Brothers! Thank goodness for
Bentley-the-Root-Beer-Tosser.

I think I'll offer the
next brother through the door a root beer. This could be really
fun. (Hee hee!)

I'm working on another
computer like the one I sent you. I figure by the time I build it,
you should have some feedback. (No pressure. I simply want to be
ready in the event you do have some...) I'll be very happy if you
don't find anything wrong or think of some idea to improve the
laptop, but I doubt this is possible. Very few things are perfect.
Most things can be improved on, and this is especially true with
electronics. So, if you have comments or suggestions, I'd like to
hear them.

Did you find the music I
downloaded from my collection yet? Let me know what you do and
don't like, okay?

Yours,

Lainy

She hit the send button and waited for
the mail to transmit before reading the rest of her messages. She
responded to the necessaries and then, with a sigh, decided she'd
better go work out. Which provided yet another excuse to put off
working on her security problem. Running would be more
fun.

At least having Bentley offered a vast
improvement in her motivation to exercise. She’d discovered he
liked to run and moderated his pace to suit hers. She wondered if
Mitch had facilitated this in his dog. Marines needed to stay in
shape and Mitch certainly appeared to be so. From the little she’d
glimpsed of him in his company picture.

She whistled for Bentley before
remembering she'd forgotten to let him back in. Striding to the
door, she tugged on her sneakers and let the door bang shut behind
her as she scanned the horizon for him. Thinking of her current
security issues, she ran back inside, found her key, set the alarm,
and locked the door before exiting.

Lainy whistled again and watched as
Bentley raced from around her grandparent’s house and flew at her,
his laughing, happy dog face in place. She dropped to her knees to
hug him and stroke his silky fur, grateful she'd been able to meet
this dog. And share a little part in his life.

Bentley didn't allow her much
opportunity to woolgather, eager as usual to run. Laughing at his
nudging she performed some preliminary stretches before they set
off. Bentley didn't leave her side to chase anything, and Lainy
often wondered about this. She thought he might believe he needed
to protect her, but how he'd manage to accomplish this better than
eight hundred relatives was beyond her.

She thought about Mitch as they ran.
Hoping someday she'd have the opportunity to run with him. Glancing
down at his dog, she didn't think that hope was
unfounded.

*****

To:
[email protected]

From:
[email protected]

Subject: re: Lainy's
belief

Hello Mitch,

Don't tell, show
her!

Yours,

Melly

Mitch grinned when he read Melly's
reply. Short, simple and to the point. He stroked his beard stubble
and wished for the eighty-ninth time he was back home where he
could be with Lainy in person. Having an ocean between them was
tiresome and frustrating. This conversation would be better served
face to face.

How in the world did a man thousands
of miles away show a woman she was beautiful and desirable? For
that matter, how did a man show his next door neighbor this?
Pursing his lips, Mitch decided he’d better talk to Alex. His
friend had more knowledge of these things.

*****

“
What do you mean how do
you show a woman she's the most desirable, beautiful woman in the
world? Are you on crack, Mitch?” Al's voice rose an octave and the
suspicious look he currently wore should have made Mitch back off,
but this was too important.

“
No, I'm living halfway
across the world from her and I've got the hots for a woman who’s
been jerked around by idiots. She’s apparently had a couple bad
relationships. Then she overhears more jerks making stupid comments
about her.”

“
How old is this woman?” Al
lost some of his suspicion. In fact, an interested gleam now
appeared in his eyes.

“
I suppose in her early
thirties, why?” Mitch answered, confused at his friend’s
question.

“
This woman is in her
thirties and she’s only had two relationships?”

Mitch figured his friend was now
deadly serious because Al set his Game Boy aside. “Yes.”

“
What happened with the two
guys?”

“
I get the impression she’s
never told anyone that.”

“
I wonder why she never
told anyone.”

Mitch shrugged. “Don’t know.” But he’d
like to.

“
Is she a nerd?”

“
Yes.
No. An unclaimed treasure
. She's
amazing, Al. Incredible and she doesn't even know it.”

Al took a step back and raised a hand
in defense. “Yo, cookie boy, I get the picture. No need to sputter
all over Uncle Al, here, 'kay?”

Mitch nodded. “I can show you better
than I can tell you.”

The suspicious look reappeared in Al's
eyes.

Mitch rolled his own. “Her family sent
me some home videos. I've seen two, and the second is the one that
shows her low self-esteem. I'll show you what I've seen so
far.”

“
You've got this woman on
video?”

“
Yes.”

“
Well, why didn't you say
so?” Al sounded interested. “You still have cookies,
right?”

*****

“
That's
Lainy?” Al’s nose nearly touched the laptop
screen. Mitch pushed his friend back from the computer and brushed
cookie crumbs from the keyboard.

“
That's Lainy.” He watched
Al's face.

He'd decided to show Al the second
video so his friend could see Lainy's beauty. Al knew Lainy had
built his new computer and with the laptop running like a
well-oiled engine, he'd witness her brain power in action,
too.

Al watched the events unfold on the
screen. With first Melly clearing the room of munchkins and then
the subsequent conversation where Lainy clearly had no idea she was
a delectable, unbelievable woman and any smart man would be
awestruck to know her, much less date her.

When Melly told Lainy that maybe she
ought to start looking to Navy SEALs and Marines, Al hooted in
agreement. Grinning, Mitch snagged another cookie and hit the stop
button when the scene finished.

“
You said her brother took
this video?” Al took a bite of a huge sugar cookie with bright blue
icing and yellow stars.

“
Yeah.”

“
I think this guy is trying
to matchmake, brother. You want that?” Al cocked a glance at
Mitch.

Mitch didn't hesitate. “Absolutely.
Lainy is the most amazing woman. She thinks she's a geek and not
enticing to men. Which is why I'm looking for advice, not watching
you drool all over my woman,” Mitch reprimanded and smacked Al
upside the head. Al laughed a deep belly laugh and moved out of the
smack zone.

“
I'm a man, and she's a
fine piece of woman, Mitch.” Al took another bite of cookie. “That
she's also a genius is amazing. I had no idea you liked intelligent
women, either. What happened?”

Mitch snuck in a good punch.
“Seriously, how do I convince Lainy of all this? She doesn't
believe it.”

“
You think she really
doesn't remember this SEAL?”

“
Why would she lie? She had
no idea her brother was videotaping her. I doubt Melly knew,
either.” Mitch chewed his cookie, but didn’t taste it.

“
I got the same impression.
That the end of the video?”

“
Yeah.”

“
Hhhmmm.”

“
Yeah?”

“
Let's see the other
one.”

“
Sure.”

Mitch located the first video he'd
watched and slipped the disk in his computer. Lainy came into view
again, as her sister and brother-in-law entered the closet and
Lainy began directing traffic.

Al laughed at all the appropriate
places and shook his head. “This really happened?”

“
Yes, and from what I
gathered, it isn't the first time, either. I think she's some sort
of legend.”

“
Wow. She sure seems
brilliant. I wonder if her brother's brain really is pea-sized,” Al
spoofed and Mitch groaned as he sorted through the other
videos.

“
I wonder how long we'll
have until we get shipped out again.” He contemplated between the
DVDs entitled
Bentley the Lake
Tosser
and
Lainy
the Commando
.

“
Don't know. Haven't
heard.” Al peered over his shoulder. “You got others?”

“
Two more.”

“
How does her brother get
into these places without Lainy knowing? She's supposed to be an
electronics expert.”

Mitch shot him a look. “She is an
electronics expert.”

“
I know, but how does she
not know?”

“
Her brother, Ed,” Mitch
said, when his brain finally engaged.

“
Ed, who?” Al sounded like
he'd lost the conversational thread.

“
Ed Morrison, Lainy's
brother. He's the one who records these videos.”

“
Ed Morrison? Isn't he that
military expert?”

“
What do you mean military
expert?” A grain of knowledge niggled in his mind.

“
High powered rifle scopes,
top of the line security cameras that can record in the darkest
places without detection-” Al rattled off.