Nerd and the Marine (14 page)

“
Well, I am sort of fond of
the man.” A smile flirted with Melly’s lips.

“
Like you slept any
better.”

“
Okay, well, I will admit I
was excited about coming, too.”

“
And when Rick gets back
from fishing, the two of you will snuggle up together in the
cottage and take a cozy little nap.”

“
Probably,” Melly
prevaricated. She looked everywhere but at Lainy.

“
Look, use some birth
control this time, will you? It's not as easy directing traffic in
your house as it is in Will's.”

“
We're not Laurie and Greg,
either, so that should be in our favor.”

“
Yeah, like that makes any
difference at all. You've still got four munchkins running around
here.”

“
They're not so little
now.” Melly’s lips twisted down.

“
Hello, your youngest isn't
even ready for potty training yet,” Lainy reminded her
sister.

“
But Brent is already
eight. How did that happen?”

“
Well, he was born and then
he had his first birthday and then his second and then-”

“
I get the picture, Lainy,
thank you,” Melly said half laughing, half in
exasperation.

“
I hoped you’d know how he
came to be that age.” Lainy shrugged.

“
You'll understand when you
and Mitch have babies,” Melly said firmly and Lainy’s heart
wrenched.

“
Excuse me?” Not believing
Melly had just said what she heard.

“
I said, when you and Mitch
have babies, you'll understand,” Melly repeated patiently and
Lainy’s heart lurched again. She stood abruptly to drag the cooler
to the fridge.

“
I don't recall mentioning
I wanted babies, and even if I did, I doubt Mitch would be willing
to help me. We’re just friends.” How she wished those words weren't
true, because somewhere along the way she’d obviously ceased
thinking of him as just a friend. When had that happened? She had
dreaded sending that first e-mail and now he was more than a
friend?

Lainy busied herself by shoving the
cooler contents into the fridge. She didn't miss Melly’s raised
eyebrow. Her sister said, “If you think so.” Her tone belied her
words.

“
What do you mean if I
think so?”

“
Well, I don't know for
certain, but I think Mitch would be more than willing to help you
have a baby. I also believe he'd start breaking heads if some other
man decided to make moves on you.” Melly sounded firm and honest.
As though she believed her own words. No doubt - just simple
fact.

Heart thumping painfully, Lainy stared
at Melly. What if Mitch was slightly interested in her? What if he
would be open to dating her? Even on a casual basis? Swaying under
the impact of the emotions bombarding her from unknown directions,
Lainy groped for a chair.

Shell-shocked, she dropped onto the
seat and stared at Melly like she'd never seen her before. “Do you
think so?” she whispered.

Lainy couldn't quell the fiery desire
and the rampant need to be close to a man she'd never met. She
couldn't halt the overwhelming need to know him better. He’d been a
friend in her mind a minute ago, but now...

Mitch had already touched her soul.
She wanted to be a part of him, already felt as though he were a
part of her. A missing, vital piece she hadn’t realized wasn't
there until he and his dog barreled into her life.

And she hadn't met him in person
yet.

What if he decided he didn’t want
her?

She'd know him the minute he did
materialize, but would he know her? Indeed, she'd be able to locate
him in a crowd of thousands of Marines. She could probably find him
through scent alone. Which was ridiculous since she'd never smelled
him. Yet she knew him.

“
Oh, baby, I'm not
positive, but I believe Mitchel Monahan feels something for you. He
might not even realize it yet, but I think he'd get pretty
possessive.” Melly’s voice broke into her thoughts and Lainy’s
heart skittered.

At this rate, she'd end up in the
hospital with a heart attack and she really wanted to enjoy this
newest revelation. The thought that Mitch might be interested in
her had been an unspoken, anguished hope, yet she'd never dared to
allow the thought to fully materialize.

He was the figment of her every
desire. Everything she'd wanted in a man. With some bonus material
thrown in. But he was thousands of miles away. Was that part of his
appeal? To discover he might be interested in her sent her into a
teenage angst she'd never experienced before. Her previous dating
experiences had left deep scars though... Could she trust a man
again?

“
What does a woman do with
a man?”

Melly didn’t hesitate and her
expression turned dreamy on her very beautiful face. “You love
them, live with them, build a life with them. Create a
family.”

“
I don’t know if I can do
all that,” Lainy wailed, her voice ending on a moan. She hadn’t
experienced any of those things in her previous relationships.
They’d left her feeling... dirty and disgusted.

“
Why not?”

“
What if it doesn’t work
out?” What if those same feelings happened with Mitch? What if he
turned out like the men in her past?
What
if he didn’t
?

“
What if it does?” Melly
stared at her in exasperation. “Have any of us had a relationship
that didn’t work?”

“
No, but I’m not like any
of you. I’ve had two.” She was currently the only Morrison to fail
in the relationship department.
Twice
.

“
When are you going to
share those experiences with us?” Melly’s voice had grown
quiet.

Lainy’s stomach clenched and she
thought she might throw up. “I’m not.”

“
Why not?”

“
Because, I’m Lainy, I’m
not perfect and beautiful like the rest of you.” She was, on the
other hand, frustrated and scared.

“
Hello? Neither am I. With
any relationship, there’s risk. You have to want the relationship
enough to take the risk.” Melly clutched her hands in front of her,
drawing them to her chest. Then shrugged, like all this was
obvious.

“
What if the love isn’t
worth it?” Because what she’d experienced had been horrible.
Definitely not worth the pain. Not even worth the minimal, fleeting
joy.

“
Then it’s not true love.
You have to decide that.”

“
I don’t know how,” Lainy
whispered.

Melly hugged her.

“
You let this relationship
take its course, sweetie. Don't force the issue, but keep up what
you're doing. Be yourself. Show him the true Lainy. It's pretty
easy to fall in love with someone when they're themselves. And this
distance thing between you might be your relationship redeemer. The
fact you
have
to
communicate via e-mail is the best way for you to relax,” Melly
said emphatically while Lainy stared at her.

“
What do you mean?” She
hated the desperation she could hear in her own voice.

“
You tense up around men,
Lain. You relaxed around Sam, and guess what, he was interested.
You've relaxed with Mitch, and guess what, he's interested. You've
never given the other intelligent men you've encountered a chance.
You tense up and freeze them out. So, of course they're not going
to pursue you. They believe you're not interested.”

“
I see,” Lainy said,
although she didn't.

“
No, you don't, but just
keep on with what you're doing. And, Lainy, when you do finally
meet Mitch in person, continue to be the woman you are. Be Lainy
Morrison. Don't go into I-am-the-super-brain-nerd-girl mode you
develop whenever attractive, smart men are around. Just be who you
are with us. Mitch is practically family already.”

Lainy bit her lip. “Everyone does seem
to love him.”

“
Yes, we do. And that's
going to be something he's got to work through.”

“
What?”

“
Well, think about it,
Lain, he's grown up in an orphanage. How many people do you think
loved him? I'm betting he doesn't think he's lovable.”

Lainy sputtered. “But that's not true
at all.”

“
Yes, I know that, and you
know that, but does he?” Melly asked quietly. “Just like we know
you’re beautiful, but you don’t. You and Mitch are more alike than
you think.”

*****

Long after Melly left, Lainy sat in
the same chair and watched the shadows trace across her house in
various interesting patterns. Normally she would see something in
the patterns to inspire her. But today she barely noticed
them.

Instead, she saw visions of her and
Mitch together. Here at the lake. At home in her house. Romping
with Bentley. Raking leaves and carving pumpkins. Gathered around a
fire sipping hot chocolate and roasting marshmallows. Shoveling
snow. Eating turkey and cranberry sauce together.

Opening gifts from family. Exchanging
loving Valentine's kisses. Planting bulbs and watching the first
flowers bloom. Lainy wanted to cuddle with Mitch in front of the
fireplace she rarely used, because sitting in front of a fireplace
could be a lonely place.

She wanted to snuggle with him under a
quilt made with love by a treasured aunt. She longed to see his
face on the pillow next to hers. Bentley’s dog face was nice but
not enough. Frowning, Lainy realized she wanted it all. She wanted
what all of her family had. Her siblings were completely in love
with their spouses. Still. Many of them had been married fifteen
years already.

But she’d always been a stranger on
the outside looking in, knowing a happy marriage would never happen
to her after her two debacles. Those experiences had taught her she
wasn’t cut out for a relationship. Humiliation had been the
overwhelming emotion she took away from her experiences. And
self-loathing. She couldn’t even get dating right. Lainy had
already resigned herself to the life of a spinster aunt.

But what about Mitch? Did he believe
he wasn't lovable? Did he feel like he couldn't cause love for him
to grow in another? How could she show him this wasn't in the least
bit true? Would he first believe he wanted her and then decide to
keep her for the long haul?

Chewing a fingernail, Lainy pondered
these things in her heart, wondering if she could make a
difference.

Chapter Sixteen

Tired, but eager for his computer,
Mitch stifled a yawn as he strode across base. This mission had
only kept him away overnight and most of the next day, but now he
was eager to see if he'd heard from Lainy. She never seemed to be
too far from him. If only he could show her that. He wanted her so
much, but had no idea how to prove himself. How to be
effective?

He entered his tent and fired up the
computer, unbuttoning his shirt as he waited for the machine. As
soon as the icon formed, he clicked on his e-mail and awaited the
download process. He tapped a finger, wondering what had happened
to his former nearly bottomless reserves of patience.

His inbox finally showed
and he saw a message from her. With attachments.
Awesome
. He clicked on
the message and was happy to read she'd be at the lake. She'd be
there by now, since technically, it was still Thursday in America.
He wondered if Bentley had tossed any of her brothers in the lake
yet? Grinning he decided to ask.

He could almost feel her anticipation.
He'd like to visit the lake with her someday. See her world through
his own eyes. Actually, he wanted to experience every aspect of her
world. He wanted to watch her work. Did she stick her tongue out
when engrossed in a project? Did she crawl into her work so much a
bomb exploding beside her wouldn’t startle her? Mitch suspected
so.

He finished reading the e-mail and
then clicked on the attachment. When the picture downloaded, he saw
Bentley proudly sitting beside a tree, and he noticed a little sign
next to his dog. Clicking on the sign to enlarge it, he saw,
“Squirrel free zone” and laughed. Out loud and heartily.

Bentley still must feel the need to
rid Lainy's yard of all vermin. He clicked out of the enlargement
and took in every part of the picture he could. He wanted to see
her backyard and house. He wanted to see her. How he wished they
didn't have a blasted ocean between them. If they lived on the same
continent, there could be some hope of seeing each other in person
in the near future.

But as it stood, his tour lasted a
year and he'd only served a month and a half. This promised to be a
very long tour. Unless the skirmish ended or he was injured. He
didn't want to think about the latter and the former was
unlikely.

To:
[email protected]

From:
[email protected]

Subject: The
Lake

Hello Lainy,

I'm glad you're at the
lake. Has Bentley helped any of your brothers into the water yet?
I'm wondering if you remembered to take root beer? Seems unlikely
you wouldn’t, but one never knows.