Nico (Heartbreaker #2) (10 page)

The sound of our mixed breathing is the only sound for a long time. Finally, he rolls us over so I’m underneath him. I moan as he slips out of me.

I immediately feel things change when he climbs out of bed. He’s muttering to himself in Italian, so I don’t know what he’s saying. I grab the sheet and cover myself. I feel exposed and vulnerable.

When he comes out of the bathroom, he doesn’t say anything at first. He just starts grabbing his clothes and dressing like he can’t get out of here fast enough. “Nico, you’re scaring me. What’s wrong? Did I do something?” I hate the neediness in my voice. Ugh, I sound pathetic.

He comes at me fast and grabs me by my upper arm. My heart kicks up the pace. His face is filled with pain. “I shouldn’t have touched you,” he growls.

I try to pull away from him. “Why? I wanted you to.” Does he think I’m regretting this? Is this all part of him protecting himself?

“That may be true, but I told myself, if I ever got you back, that I was going to do it right this time around. I was going to take things slow, let us get to know each other again, but what do I do? The first chance to be alone together and I fuck you!” His voice is low, but the pain is evident.

I grab him by the front of his shirt. “Do you regret it? Because I don’t, Nico.” I wait on baited breath for him to answer. What if he does regret it?

“No, I don’t,” he whispers. He lets go of my arms and grabs me by my face. “Jill, I want to take this slow. I love you, and I want you to make sure that this is what you want, that I’m who you want. Please, let me do this right. I know our time is limited, but I need to do this.”

I can see the conviction in his eyes. My eyes suddenly feel wet, and tears start leaking from them. “Okay, we’ll do this right,” I whisper, my voice cracking. He pulls me toward him and kisses my lips hard.

“
Grazie
, beautiful girl. I’m going to go. Get some sleep. Tomorrow, the three of us will go for a drive and maybe do some shopping.”

I agree. He kisses me one more time before he turns and leaves. Once I hear the click of the door, I get up and flip the safety latch. I walk on silent feet to where Nicola is sleeping soundly. I bend down and kiss her forehead. She lets out a little baby sigh and snuggles deeper into her bed.

I use the restroom and do the rest of my nightly rituals before throwing on my pajamas and climbing into bed. I stare up at the ceiling and feel hopeful for the first time in a long time.

Chapter Ten

Jill

I’m just sliding Nicola’s leggings up over her diapered bootie when there’s a knock on the door. I carry her with me to the door. When I stare through the peephole, I find Nico on the other side.

I take a deep breath and undo the safety latch. Nico looks just as nervous as I feel. Yes, I promised we could take it slow, but just looking at him makes it hard. He’s always been a specimen of pure male beauty. I miss his longer hair, though. I loved the way the ends curled and loved running my fingers through it.

I realize I’m staring and step back so he can step inside. He bends down and kisses my lips. Then he takes Nicola. Of course, as soon as he reached for her, she was practically launching herself at him. She babbles in her little baby voice while he carries her to the couch. He speaks to her in Italian as she stares up at him with complete adoration. I head into the bedroom to finish getting dressed.

I’m not sure what we’re doing. I just wear skinny jeans, boots, a peasant shirt, and a slouchy cardigan. I brush my hair and throw it into a high ponytail. I pack up some diapers, bottles, extra formula, and snacks for the baby in the messenger bag I use as a diaper bag.

After I make sure I have the sling I use when I carry her for a long distance, I come back into the sitting area and find Nico and our girl on the floor. Nico is tossing her up into the air. She squeals each time.

“I’m ready,” I tell him. We head down to his car. I’m looking forward to spending this time together.

Nico straps Nica into her car seat while I climb into the front seat. When he gets in, I ask him about his mom and if we should do this another day. “She’s okay. Gaia is with her. She was a little sick this morning, but she insisted we still do our day trip.”

I’m not sure where we’re going first, but it’s supposed to be a surprise. At first we sit in a companionable silence. Nicola’s happy chatter fills the inside of the SUV. I look in the back and see her smiling in the little mirror on the back of the seat. I turn back around and take in the view. Rolling hills fly by as we head in whatever direction it is we’re going.

I turn in my seat and look at Nico’s handsome profile. I hope that Nicola looks like her dad. She’s already got his coloring, but I hope she gets his wonderful bone structure too.

He looks at me. “What?”

“Nothing. You’re just so beautiful. I’m glad she looks like you.”

He gives me a smile that makes my stomach feel all warm and gooey. “No,
amore
. It is you that is beautiful.” He grabs my hand and brings it to his lips.

“Are you going to tell me where we’re going?” We’ve been in the car for almost an hour.

“Okay. We’re going to spend the night in Florence. In the back are extra nappies, clothes for the two of you, and extra toiletries.”

I’m speechless. I’ve been telling him that I want to see the Tuscany region for years, and now he’s actually taking us there. I can’t help the little girl squeal that leaves my lips. I clap my hands. He laughs at me and shakes his head. I pull out my phone and start looking up spots that I want to see when we get there.

When we finally reach Florence, I gasp at its beauty. For miles and miles, all I see are grape vines. I’d love to visit the vineyards in the distance, but I don’t know if it would be inappropriate to bring a child or a recovering alcoholic, so I keep those thoughts to myself.

We pull up in front of
Castello Banfi Il Borgo
.
Awe doesn’t even cover what I’m feeling right now. This place oozes romance.

“I take it you approve?” he says, a smile in his voice.

“That’s an understatement. Nico, this place is amazing. I may not want to leave.”

I climb out and take a deep breath. I can smell grapes and something else I’m unfamiliar with, but it’s invigorating. I get Nicola out of the back while Nico checks us in. I walk to a hill that overlooks miles of grapevines.

It’s pretty here. The sky is a bright vibrant blue, and the green of the grass looks like it was painted. The hotel is a vibrant old castle and looks well-maintained. I can’t wait to walk around the grounds later.

A few minutes later, I see Nico coming down the stairs toward us. As soon as he reaches us, I wrap my free arm around him. “Thank you.”

“Sweetheart, what are you thanking me for?” He kisses my forehead and then Nicola’s.

I swipe my arm in the air. “This.
Under the Tuscan Sun
is my favorite movie and book. How many times did I make you sit through the movie and listen to me go on and on about wanting to come here?” I can’t hide the hoarseness in my voice. I’m coming close to crying. “It means a lot to me that you’re doing this for me. I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to thank you for this.”

I cup his cheek and push up on my toes, touching my lips to his. It’s not a long kiss, but I hope it shows him everything I’m feeling. We break apart and make our way to our suite.

***

Nico

We walk down the walkway at the outlet mall, which, ironically, is called The Mall. I’m wearing a wrap that holds Nicola at my hip. My arm is wrapped around her as I support her bottom while she sleeps with her head on my chest. My other arm is around Jill’s shoulders. Her arm is wrapped around my waist. With a warmth I haven’t felt in a long time, I smile to myself as we walk along the walkway.

Occasionally, she disappears inside a store to look at things. I’ve told her twice to pick something she really wanted and I would buy it for her, but she’s refused me.

She steps into a store that is well-known for their shoes and handbags. I watch her through the window as she touches certain pieces reverently. She picks up a leather tote and inspects it closely. A small smile graces her lips until I see her look at the tag. Her eyes go wide. She places it back on the shelf and looks at it with longing.

Nicola and I walk to the benches. When we sit down, I send a quick text to Mila to check on my momma. She says that mom’s up and eating soup and that she’s feeling okay. I remind her that she needs to call me if that changes at all. She tells me they have it handled and to have fun.

A few minutes after I hang up, Jill joins us on the bench. She kisses our daughter’s chubby cheek and kisses mine too. I love that she has no problem showing affection toward me. It’s another positive sign that things are moving in the right direction.

After she goes into the next store, I head into the store she just stepped out of, pay for the tote, and grab her the matching wallet. I also spot a sweater dress that she’d look beautiful in. I pay extra to have them delivered to our suite back at the hotel. Luckily, I still own controlling interest in Debauchery, and it’s still the hottest club in St. Louis. I make money when Debauchery makes money even though it’s in the hands of someone else.

My club in Chicago, Destiny, is still turning a nice profit as well. I’ve always been smart with money, even when I was stupid with everything else. I’ve got a nice nest egg sitting in a bank, collecting interest. I learned all about saving from my mom. She comes from old money, and they were all taught that you need to save because it could be gone in an instant.

I step out of the store and find Jill looking around for us. Luckily, she doesn’t see me coming out of the store. “Jill,” I call to her. She turns and smiles at us. When I reach her, I grab her hand. We walk around the whole mall, conversation flowing between us.

Earlier, we had breakfast in the courtyard of our hotel, and then we went to the gallery she wanted to see. At first, she was nervous about having Nicola with us, but there were children everywhere. Did they run around all crazy? No. Jill had nothing to worry about. Nicola was mellow and just seemed to enjoy being with us. Tomorrow, before we head back to mom’s house, I’m taking Jill to see the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

We decide to head back to the hotel, put Nicola to bed, and then sit out on the patio for a coffee.

***

I tuck the blanket around Nicola and smile as she rolls to her side and sighs. I gently kiss the crown of her head and commit her freshly bathed baby scent to memory. It’s like a natural Xanax. Just the scent of her makes me feel relaxed.

I step into the kitchenette and grab two cups of coffee. I put in the cream and sugar the way we like them and carry them out to where my girl is waiting. The fire in the pit is high enough to warm us. I sit down on the end of the sofa. I situate Jill so she’s between my legs. She leans back against my chest.

In the distance, I hear music playing and people laughing. I see twinkle lights in the distance. The night is cool but beautiful, and the stars are shining brightly.

“They must be having a party,” I whisper in her ear.

She sighs. “Sounds like it. Did baby girl go down okay for you?”

“Sí
,
she went right to sleep. Did you have a good day today?”

When we came back to the room, she saw the boxes sitting on the bed and walked carefully over to them. She opened the box with the tote first and brought it to her nose. I understand why. The smell of leather is wonderful. She pulled out the matching wallet, inspected it, and then laid it to the side.

She looked at me with a raised brow and pulled the top of the box off. She took out the dress and hugged it to her chest. Then she came to me and threw her arms around my neck. She said it was too much, but thanked me.

“I had a great day. I know I’ve already said it, but thank you.” She turns her head and kisses me under my chin. I wrap my arms around her and hug her tight to my chest.

“Dance with me, beautiful.”

I help her stand up and pull her close to me. The music is soft, but I can hear it well enough to begin swaying back and forth. This has been the best day I’ve had in a long time. I don’t want our night to end.

I rest my lips against her temple and inhale the flowery scent surrounding her. I’m not sure if we dance for only a few minutes or a few hours. All I know is that I don’t want to be anywhere else. I hope and pray that I get the chance to do this with her until the day I’m no longer of this earth.

Afterward, we sit and drink our fresh coffees. We even video chat with Gabe, who doesn’t hide his concern about Jill and me. I can’t blame him. I have sisters, and if some guy had hurt them like I’d hurt Jill, I’d have a hard time forgiving him. I just want, with every fiber of my being, to do things right. I’ve messed so many things up in my life, but I vow to fix this.

Jill went inside a few minutes ago to start getting ready for bed. I extinguish the fire and take a minute to calm myself. I want so bad to walk into our room and peel Jill’s clothes off until she’s bare to me and bury myself deep inside her. Since last night, that’s all I’ve thought about. Well, maybe not all, but damn near close.

I step inside and find it’s quiet. I shut everything down, do my nightly routine, and step into the bedroom.

Jill is fast asleep with her fist tucked under her chin. Her soft snores fill the room. I watch her with a smile on my lips as I strip down to my boxer briefs. I should’ve gotten two rooms. As much as I want to take this slow, I know as soon as I slide in and feel her body against mine, I am going to attack her.

With the blankets drawn back, I climb in beside her and shut the lamp off. In the darkness, I lie on my back and think about anything but Jill lying next to me in nothing but a nightgown. I don’t think about what she’s not wearing under it.

Jill must sense I’m in bed with her because she rolls to me and wraps her arm around my waist. I tell God that he’s not very funny. Her body feels so good and right. Her flowery scent wraps around me and fills me with warmth.

I brush her hair back from her face. Even in the darkness, I can make out her beautiful features. I roll us until her back is to my front and wrap my body around hers. It doesn’t take long before my eyes feel heavy.

Baby talk pulls me from my sleep, which is too bad because Jill is wrapped around me. It feels so good to have her against me again. The
bambina
is up. I reluctantly dislodge myself and take care of business in the bathroom. I throw my pants on and head around the corner to my baby girl. She doesn’t see me at first, so I watch her talk to her doll and smack it against the side of her cot.

“Nica,” I say softly. She turns. The way her whole face lights up does wonderful things to my heart and soul. She lifts her arms, so I scoop her up.

“Good morning, my beautiful angel. Shall we change your diaper?”

“Pa, pa, pa,” she says along with some other baby gibberish I don’t understand. I wipe her off and change her. Then, I give her a bottle.

I carry her back into the room. Jill hasn’t moved, so I lay the baby down and get in next to her, positioning Nicola so that she’s between me and Jill’s sleeping form. With her bottle to her lips, Nica stares up at me while reaching her other hand out, gripping her momma’s nose.