Night After Night (26 page)

“I
have
changed,” Sean stated a bit defensively.

Caleb lifted a dark brow. “Not if the past still has the ability to affect your future. Stop carrying around all that excess guilt and go and do what you’ve been putting off for years.”

“And what’s that?” Sean asked, not sure he wanted to hear what Caleb had to say.

“Go and see your father and set things right,” Caleb said, his tone filled with compassion and understanding of the situation. “Put it all out there, then forgive yourself for the mistakes you’ve made and move on.”

Sean knew exactly what his boss meant and Caleb was right. It was time.

Leave it to Caleb to put things into perspective,
Sean thought. He was so convinced that Zoe wouldn’t be able to love him completely, but in reality it was
he
who was having a difficult time coming to terms with his past and accepting that he was a changed man. One who would never, ever, do anything to deliberately hurt the people he cared about and loved.

Including Zoe.

Especially her.

Caleb stood, clearly done with his lecture. “Just keep in mind that life doesn’t have to be complicated unless you make it that way.”

Sean laughed. He
had
made his life complicated for way too long, and it was damned time he stopped and made everything right.

After a long seven-hour drive to the Nevada State Prison, Sean sat at a table in the minimum-security visitation area, waiting anxiously for a guard to escort his father into the room. Sean had a lot to discuss with his father today, things that should have been aired long ago, and was so ready to get everything out in the open between them.

As soon as Casey arrived and saw Sean, a huge grin transformed his features as he made his way to Sean’s table, and for a brief moment Sean experienced a stab of guilt that it had been far too long since he’d seen or talked to his father. Just as quickly, Sean released those regrets. Today was the beginning of a new relationship with his father, one built on honesty and mutual respect.

Sean greeted Casey with a firm handshake and a smile. “Hi, Dad.”

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it?” Casey said as he slid into the seat opposite Sean. Casey wore standard inmate issue—a blue shirt and pants—and though his dark hair had some gray at the temples, he still looked the same to Sean. “That job of yours must be keeping you real busy.”

As always, his father’s tone was laced with understanding. Despite the long lengths of time in between Sean’s visits, Casey never made him feel bad for his absence, as if he knew how difficult it was for his son to see him in a prison setting. But for Sean, his reasons for keeping his distance were a lot deeper and more emotional than that.

“Work has been interesting,” Sean said, describing the past few weeks the only way he could, leaving out the mention of Zoe and Grant Russo—for now. Sean would get there, but he and Casey only had an hour of time and he didn’t want to waste it with surface talk. “I was hoping that you and I could talk. There’s some things I need to tell you.”

Worry darkened Casey’s blue eyes. “Sure. What’s on your mind, son?”

Sean exhaled a deep breath and jumped right in. “I never told you, but six years ago I served eight months at High Desert State Prison,” he said in a rush. “I should have told you when it happened, but I didn’t want you to know how stupid I’d been.”

Sean didn’t notice any shock from Casey when he learned his son had been incarcerated.

“What happened?” his father asked calmly.

Sean clasped his hands on the table in front of him and told his father about that last con and what had happened to the woman involved and how overwhelmed with shame Sean had been that he’d inadvertently hurt an innocent person for his own selfish reasons.

Once he was done, he waited for his father to express his disappointment, but it never came. Instead, oddly enough, Casey’s gaze turned compassionate. “You’re my son,” he said, his deep voice conveying how much he cared for Sean. “You learned what you knew from me. And after everything I’ve done, the last thing I’m going to do is judge you. Now it’s my turn to be honest. I knew about your time in High Desert.”

“You did?” Sean asked, shocked. “How?”

“An inmate from High Desert transferred here to Nevada State. He knew who you were, and when he found out my last name he asked if you were my son.”

Sean searched his father’s gaze. “Why didn’t you say something to me?”

“I figured when you were ready, you’d tell me yourself,” Casey said with a shrug, making it very clear that Sean’s time in prison wasn’t an issue for him. “Now tell me what changed that made you feel the need to tell me about your past. Did you meet someone special?”

Geez, were his feelings for Zoe stamped on his forehead for the entire world to see? “What makes you ask that?” Sean asked, curious to hear what his father had to say.

Casey smiled, the slight wrinkles around his eyes making an appearance. “Because there’s something different about you today. You used to come here with your guard up, and now it’s gone. I’m guessing it’s due to some woman’s influence. They have a way of softening a man’s hard edges.”

Sean laughed and shook his head. “Yes, I met a woman. Her name is Zoe Russo. And you know her father, Grant Russo.”

Casey’s dark brows rose high, his expression concerned. “Well, now, I’m sure there’s an interesting story to go along with
that.
”

“There is,” Sean said, and summarized the events of the past few weeks and the case Caleb had assigned to him that had brought Zoe into his life.

“The thing is, when I took the case, I wanted revenge for you,” Sean said once he was finished with his story. “I wanted to bring Grant down and make him pay for sending you to prison while he got off scot-free.”

“You don’t need to fight my battles, son,” Casey said, even as a ghost of a smile touched the corner of his mouth. “Grant was out to save himself, and given the chance, I would have done the same thing to save my own ass. That said, I’m glad to hear that Russo
has
changed for the better.”

Sean was so thrown by his father’s easy acceptance that he didn’t know what to say.

Casey flattened his hands on the table, his gaze softening as he stared at Sean. “Now that we’re getting things off our chests, I think it’s a good time to tell you how sorry I am.”

“Why are
you
sorry?”

“Because I should have been a better father to you,” Casey said, a wealth of emotion ringing in his voice. “When you were just a kid, I should have been there for you on a regular basis, and not just sporadically. And when your mother died and you came to live with me, I should have set a better example than teaching you the life of a con man. It was all I knew, but it wasn’t fair that I exposed you to that kind of lifestyle.”

It was clear to Sean that his father had lived with his own regrets and, just as Sean had done, spent a lot of his time in prison ruminating over those things he wished he’d done differently.

“It’s okay,” Sean said, wanting to ease his dad’s conscience.

“No, it wasn’t okay,” he replied, cutting himself no slack as a parent. “But I do believe it’s going to be okay from here on out. For both of us. I still have a few more years to serve before I’m out of this joint and then I’ll have the chance to start over. But right now, you need to live your life to the fullest. And don’t ever take the love of a good woman for granted like I did. I loved your mother, and I should have been a better man for her, too.”

Sean nodded, accepting his father’s apology.

“So, this Zoe, she doesn’t hold what happened with me and her father against you?” Casey asked curiously.

Sean shook his head. “No, she doesn’t. She’s an amazing woman, Dad.”

Just then, one of the guards announced that the visiting hour was over, and for the first time ever Sean wished he had more time to spend talking with his father. But Sean had only minutes to say good-bye, and instead of the handshake he usually shared with his dad, Sean pulled Casey into a hug. The gesture was so unexpected that it took him a moment to realize what Sean had done and return the embrace.

When Casey pulled back, a hint of moisture glinted in his eyes. “Don’t wait so long in between visits the next time, okay?”

Sean smiled. “I won’t,” he promised.

“And bring Zoe with you sometime, so I can meet her myself.”

Sean knew his father would adore Zoe as much as he did. “I will, if she’ll have me.” Because even though he’d resolved things with his father, there was a whole lot more between himself and Zoe he’d left unsaid, and he had no idea where he stood with her.

But the one thing he did know for certain: He was prepared to fight for the woman he loved.

Zoe strolled into her living room, two plates of chocolate cake in hand, and sat down next to Jessica. She handed one of the desserts to her friend, which Zoe had made especially for Jessica earlier that day, since this would be their last evening together for a while. Tomorrow night at Mandalay Bay was the opening of her new tour, and after that her life would be busy and chaotic for the next few months as she traveled across the country performing for her fans.

Jessica took a bite of the rich, decadent cake and sighed blissfully. “You’re so good to me, Zoe. I’m not sure I deserve you.”

“You do,” Zoe assured her friend with a smile, and ate a bite of the dessert, too. This same chocolate cake reminded Zoe of her first date with Sean, which had led to the hottest, most arousing make-out session she’d ever had the pleasure of indulging in.

Everything
she did these days reminded her of Sean, and she didn’t see that ending anytime soon. Once her boutique was open, she had a feeling she’d be seeing a lot more of him at the Onyx, which would be painful, but she was determined to make it work.

“I’m going to miss you, Jess,” Zoe said, suddenly feeling a bit melancholy at the thought of not seeing her best friend on a regular basis. “You know that, right?”

“Yeah, I know, and I feel the same way.” Jessica picked up a morsel of cake and popped it into her mouth. “But I’ll be back next week for the opening of your boutique. It might only be for a few hours, but you know I wouldn’t miss your big day for anything.”

“Thanks.” She was grateful that Jessica, as the face of ZR Designs, was able to squeeze in an appearance at the boutique to celebrate the opening. “So, how excited are you about kicking off your tour at Mandalay Bay tomorrow night?”

Jessica slanted her an anxious look. “I’m more nervous than anything else.”

“Why?” Zoe frowned in concern. “You’re not usually prone to pre-show jitters.”

“Yeah, well, I don’t usually have Noah Young sitting in the VIP section watching me,” Jessica said wryly. “He won those VIP and backstage-pass tickets at the auction.” She paused in thought. “Then again, maybe he won’t show at all.”

Realizing that the conversation had taken a serious turn, Zoe set her half-eaten cake on the coffee table in front of the couch and gave her friend her full attention. “Is that what you want? Noah to be a no-show?”

“Yes…no…” Jessica groaned in frustration. “I honestly don’t know anymore. A part of me is hoping he’ll be there, and the other part is so afraid that he won’t come at all. And if that happens, it’s a good indication that he’s done with me, for good.”

“You’re the one who walked away, Jessica,” Zoe reminded her, and she knew how badly such a rejection could sting, considering Sean had done the same to her. “If you want him in your life, you need to tell him how you feel before you go on tour.”

Jessica worried on her bottom lip. “What if he’s changed his mind? What if he’s had too much time to think about not being able to have a family of his own if we’re together and he’s moved on?”

Zoe seriously doubted that was a possibility, but she understood Jessica’s fears. Recalling the two slips of paper she’d come across just that morning, Zoe decided to share them with her best friend. “There’s something I want to show you,” she said, and headed back into the kitchen.

She opened what she fondly referred to as her junk drawer, which was filled with small miscellaneous household items she didn’t have a specific place for, and grabbed the two notes, then returned to the living room. Once she was sitting on the couch again, she presented Jessica with one of the small rectangular pieces of paper.

“Do you remember a couple of weeks ago when we had Chinese and read our fortunes from the cookies?” Zoe asked. “I must have put them in my junk drawer and found them this morning. Read yours again.”

Jessica glanced down at the writing on the paper. “‘Something you lost will soon turn up.’”

“At the time you thought you might find your favorite Cartier pen that you’d lost,” Zoe reminded her. “But I think it meant something far more personal. Like you losing Noah, then finding him again.”

Jessica rolled her eyes. “Come on, do you really think a Chinese fortune cookie can predict the future?”

“No, I don’t,” Zoe said with a laugh. “But I’d like to believe that you did find something you’d lost. Something precious and rare and irreplaceable. Like love, and Noah.”

Jessica hesitated as she considered what Zoe had said, then she exhaled a shaky breath. “You know what? I think you’re right.”

Zoe grinned. “Of course I am.”

“Remind me what your piece of paper says,” Jessica said, suddenly interested in dissecting Zoe’s fortune, too.

She’d fully expected her friend to turn the tables on her, which was only fair, she knew. “‘Sometimes the object of the journey is not the end, but the journey itself.’” Zoe glanced back up at Jessica. “At the time, you thought maybe it had something to do with ZR Designs and the boutique, but I think it has more to do with the journey of meeting Sean, discovering everything about my father’s past, and learning that people can and do change.”

“I like that,” Jessica said with a smile.

Zoe did, too, but she didn’t want the conversation to focus on her. “You asked me a few minutes ago what if Noah has changed his mind about you and he’s moved on. And to that I want to tell you that life is full of what-ifs, Jess. But you’ll never know the true answer to your question if you don’t give a relationship with Noah a chance. Wouldn’t you rather risk your heart one more time with Noah than spend years wondering what could have been?”

“My heart is already involved,” Jessica said, her voice emotion-filled. “Always has been. There’s been no one else for me since Noah; you know that.”

Zoe reached out and grabbed Jessica’s hand. “I
do
know that, but I think it’s time that you told Noah exactly how you feel about him and let him know that you’re willing to see what the future holds for the two of you.”

Jessica nodded, then tipped her head curiously at Zoe. “What about you and Sean?”

Zoe shrugged past the ache in her chest she’d been living with since Sean had walked away. “I risked my heart, and I have no regrets. You need to do the same with Noah.”

“I will,” Jessica promised, her voice infused with a newfound confidence.

Zoe smiled. “Good.” At least one of them would get the happy ending they deserved.

The moment Jessica stepped out onstage the following evening to kick off the opening night of her new tour, the sold-out crowd packing the Mandalay Bay arena let out a deafening roar that reverberated through the entire stadium and sent a rush of adrenaline through her veins. Wearing a black beaded, skintight minidress and a pair of thigh-high stiletto boots—the first of a dozen costume changes she had planned for the show—she strutted along the perimeter of the stage and welcomed everyone with a wave.

“Hello, Las Vegas!” she said into her microphone. “Is everybody ready to have a great time tonight?”

Her question was met with thunderous applause and cheers of approval. As she passed the VIP section, her gaze scanned the seats, searching for the specific set of chairs that had been given to Noah as part of the VIP package he’d won.

He wasn’t there. Instead, Jessica recognized the seven-year-old girl beaming up at her as Emily, one of the patients she’d visited at the children’s hospital, with her mother sitting beside her. The only way the duo could have gotten the seats was if Noah had given his tickets to them. While it was a generous and sweet gesture on Noah’s part, the fact that he’d opted
not
to be at the concert on Jessica’s opening night spoke volumes.

But she had no time to dwell on the pain and disappointment of Noah’s absence, not when she had twelve thousand people to entertain. Emily waved at her, and Jessica blew the little girl a kiss just as her band played the intro to her opening number, “It’s All for You.” With a feisty toss of her wild mane of curls, she rocked the house with the upbeat tune that had everyone jumping to their feet and dancing in the aisles.

Over the next two hours there was no room in her mind for anything but the lineup of songs she performed, the numerous costume changes that were required throughout the show, and the complex choreographed routines that required her complete focus and concentration. Even after the concert ended, she spent another hour at a special meet and greet with VIP fans backstage where she signed autographs, answered questions, and had her picture taken with them.

It wasn’t until she was finally alone in her dressing room where it was quiet that she began to relax and unwind and thoughts of Noah returned. While the night hadn’t turned out the way she’d planned as far as he was concerned, she refused to give up hope that he still loved and wanted her. She needed to take a shower and change, and as soon as she did she intended to find Noah and lay her heart on the line.

The upscale changing room came with a large bathroom, complete with a shower and other necessities, which Jessica took full advantage of. Once the night’s sweat and makeup were washed away, she stepped out of the stall, dried off, and slipped into the casual cotton dress she’d brought in with her. Deciding to let her curls air-dry to save time, she exited the bathroom and came to an abrupt halt when she saw Noah standing in the middle of the room.

Shock rendered her speechless, while her heart beat double time in her chest. The slow, sexy smile curving his lips made her weak in the knees, and she knew that no matter how many years passed, he’d always have that effect on her. He was her first love, and she knew without a doubt he would also be her last and only love. There would be no other man for her except Noah. Ever.

“You were amazing tonight,” he said, his deep, husky voice adding to the slow heat of awareness building inside her. “So hot and sexy and exciting to watch.”

He’d been there tonight, and the realization made her incredibly happy, even as a half-dozen questions swirled in her head, the first of which was how in the world he had breached her tight security. “How did you get in here?”

“Simon,” he said with a sheepish shrug. “What can I say? The guy likes me.”

She shook her head, her mind still reeling with confusion. “I was hoping you’d come tonight, but I didn’t see you in the VIP section.”

“I had a regular seat.” Still standing too far away, he pushed his hands into the front pockets of his jeans. “Granted, the section I was in wasn’t nearly as good as VIP, but I didn’t want you to see me and be distracted on your opening night, so I offered those seats to Emily and her mother.”

“That was very sweet of you,” Jessica said, recalling how excited Emily had been during the concert. Then Jessica asked the biggest question of all. “So, what are you doing here
now
?”

He tipped his head, his body language exuding pure male confidence. “Did you really think I was going to let you leave on tour with so much left unsettled between us?”

She swallowed hard, not sure what to make of that, considering the last time they’d been together she’d been adamant that things between them were over. “What do you mean, unsettled?”

“You being stubborn and so certain things between us just couldn’t work,” he said, still keeping his distance. “I wanted to give you time and space to come to your senses, but I have to admit that being apart was a good thing. It gave me the chance to think about what a life with you unable to have children would be like.”

Oh, God.
She found it difficult to breathe, for fear that he’d come to the conclusion that her inability to give them a family was a deal-breaker for him. “And?” The one word escaped her on a croak of sound.

“I realized that there is one thing I’m absolutely certain of.” He paused for a moment, his gaze so tender and caring as it held hers. “My life isn’t complete without you in it.”

Tears filled her eyes, because she felt the exact same way about him.

He walked toward her, finally closing the distance between them until he was standing only inches away. Grabbing her hand, he placed her palm right over his rapidly beating heart, making her wonder how she could have ever doubted his love, his acceptance. This was a man who would care for her, protect her, and always be there for her.

With his free hand, he stroked his thumb gently along her jawline. “As for having kids with you…there are so many ways for us to have a family together. We can foster kids. We can adopt children who need loving parents. And then there are all those kids at the hospital who are a part of Wishes Are Forever that you absolutely adore, and who adore you. There will be no shortage of children in our lives.”

So overwhelmed with joy, she started to cry in earnest. He looked panicked, as if he feared he’d said something wrong. Or that she might turn him away again.

He framed her face in both of his hands and used his thumbs to wipe away the moisture on her cheeks. “I love you, Jessie,” he said roughly. “That’s all that matters, and if you—”

She pressed her fingers over his lips, stopping his flow of words. “Stop.”

He frowned and gently pulled her hand away. “But I’m not done.”

“Yes, you are,” she said, and managed a smile. He’d already said enough.
More
than enough. “You don’t need to say another word. It’s my turn to talk. I want you to know that I wasn’t going to leave on tour until I talked to you.”

“Okay,” he said hesitantly.

“I’m so sorry about the way I handled things in the past,” she said. “The only excuse I have is that I was young and scared and I thought I was doing the right thing. But there wasn’t a day that went by that I didn’t think about you, and I never stopped loving you. Whatever the future holds for us, however we’re able to have a family, I want it with you. That’s all I ever wanted.”

“It’s yours, Jessie,” he said earnestly. “
I’m
yours.”

And then he kissed her, slow and deep and passionate. Until she was boneless and breathless and so deliriously happy.