And I didn’t know. What kind of friend was I? This was someone who slept at my house every Friday and Saturday night for years.
“What’s it like? I’ve never been.”
“That’s right. You didn’t come on my twenty-first birthday trip. You’d just gotten your job.” Erin was almost a year younger than me, so I’d graduated and entered the work world first, with no hope of vacation for at least a year. “I like it. There’s a lot to do, it’s cheap to live there, and there’s a ton of work for me out there. It’s easy to get down to LA, too. You should come visit me.”
“Ryder’s thinking about moving there when the tour is over.” I second-guessed if I should have told her this, but it was no big secret. No more secret than anything else I did these days. Drake couldn’t object to where Ryder wanted to live. And it did sound like the only place that made sense for any rock star who just happened to be a vampire.
“Oh, that would be killer!” Erin kept time to the music on the gas pedal, making my coffee slosh violently around my stomach. “Wait, are you thinking of moving in with him?”
“He asked me.” I felt warm all over thinking about it. “I don’t have anywhere else to be. I need to stay in the Soul Divider witness protection program.”
“Shit, Mel, this is going to be so amazing! I can’t wait to show you around, introduce you to everyone. It will be kind of like old times, but way better. We can actually get in places now.”
I could only hope it would be as carefree as our teenage sleepovers. It would be nice to have a totally fresh start after this weird limbo the tour afforded me.
“I don’t think it’s going to be that easy. I need a total transformation.”
“Well, one thing I can guarantee you. No one in Vegas watches the news. They’re all so self-involved they wouldn’t even realize if Charles Manson was next to them.”
When I stopped laughing, I asked, “Do you ever see Drake when there’s no tour?”
“Not really.” She shrugged even though she sounded a little sad. “He goes back to his family. Only when he says he needs inspiration. He tells me I’m his muse. I mean, I have my own life too. This is just a fantasy for me.”
“Really? You don’t have any expectations?” I could always count on Erin to blow my mind.
“Plenty. But I’m just having fun, living for now. I can’t do all of this forever. I take online classes when I’m home. I might write a book about all of my adventures. Names changed to protect the innocent, of course.” She smiled at me.
I couldn’t answer her right away. I so admired her zest for life. I feared it. Everyone from my mother to my guidance counselors to my bosses told me that I needed to plan for the future. As a result, I’d already been living like a senior citizen, but with less free time and a more pathetic sex drive. I was just letting the rigor mortis set in.
My attitude needed to catch up with my recent actions. Erin just figured things out as she went along. I freaked out if I didn’t always have a plan. Now here I was, with no plan, winging it.
It felt good.
W
e arrived in Denver feeling invigorated by our time together, away from the guys. How could we not? It was gorgeous around here, and different than anything I’d ever seen in New England. Erin spent the last leg of the trip telling me about some friends in Vegas, and I was getting excited to go there. If I didn’t dread what I had to do when I got there, I might even be giddy about it.
The buses arrived before we did, not needing to stop for food or sleep. We’d taken our time getting there and had a blast doing it. If it wasn’t for me missing Ryder, I might have encouraged her to just keep going.
I left Erin in the car. She texted Drake but had yet to receive the all-clear for her to grace him with her presence. I didn’t need to wait for an engraved invite, so I headed right to the bus. I even planned on climbing into Ryder’s bunk to surprise him with a little impromptu welcome back party.
Much to my surprise, everyone was up already. The bus was quiet. No obnoxious music, no zombie killing, no laughter.
Something was wrong.
Ryder’s face looked gray, with deep blackish purple smudges under his eyes. He didn’t say anything as I walked up to him where he leaned against the entertainment center in the back. I slid my arm around his waist and kissed his cheek.
“Babe, what’s going on?” Why wasn’t anyone saying anything to me? Adam and Thomas sat on the couch, looking just as out of it.
“We can’t wake up Josiah.” Ryder’s voice was raspy and the words came slow.
“Maybe he just needs the rest.”
“We’ve never had this happen before.” Adam’s voice shook, too. It was like saying it out loud to a new person made it more real for them.
“Is he breathing?” I asked. They all looked at one another. God, did they even check? I pushed away from Ryder, and headed down to Josiah’s bunk, ripping back the curtain dramatically.
He looked normal enough, like he did when he was sleeping; on his stomach, his hand curled up under the pillow. He wasn’t snoring, which was a clue something wasn’t right. No rise and fall of his chest. I put my fingers in front his mouth and nose. Nothing. Fuck.
“We can survive without breathing.” Ryder came up behind me.
“But you breathe,” I protested. I didn’t know much about the biology of being a vampire, but I knew that even if breathing was a recreational thing, Josiah looked worse than the other three guys put together. Even in the dim light of his bunk, I could tell that his face had a bluish tinge to it. His skin felt hard and icy. Ryder’s skin felt cool, but if you didn’t know better, you’d think he’d just come in from the cold. It was like Josiah had been put in an ice cube tray. “Something isn’t right.”
“No shit, lovie. Are you sure you’re not a doctor?” Thankfully I couldn’t reach Thomas because I really wanted to punch him.
“Fuck off,” I hissed at him. “When was the last time he was okay?” I asked the other two, ignoring Thomas.
“He seemed a little off when we got off the bus, but he partied the whole time we were in Dallas.”
Josiah did disappear for long periods of time while we were at the hotels. He wasn’t loud like Adam or obnoxious like Thomas, so I never worried about him.
“What does this mean? I didn’t think that you guys could get sick.”
“Neither did we,” Ryder said from the opposite bunk as he rubbed his face. “The only way to kill us is to stop our hearts. And the only way to stop our hearts is to drive something through it or to take it out of us.”
I shuddered at the visual. “So drugs and alcohol can’t stop a vampire heart?”
They all shrugged.
“Have you called anyone for him?” I ran my hand through Josiah’s spiky hair sympathetically, and sat on the edge of his bed. He might not be responsive, but I didn’t think this was the end for Josiah. Optimistic fool.
“Who, babe?” Ryder looked so defeated. The other two looked lost. “It’s not like there are doctors all over the place that specialize in what we are.”
I didn’t want to ask, but I had to. “Does Drake know?”
All of them went grayer than they already were. “Not yet,” Adam said in a hushed tone, as if Drake could hear him.
“You know you have to tell him. He might know how to fix this.”
“I’ll call him.” Ryder got up, went back to the couch, and pulled his phone out of his pocket. The rest of us stayed by the bunks. I rubbed my hand along Josiah’s back, hoping the contact would magically spring him back to life. I stopped, with my hand over where is heart was, hoping to feel a heartbeat. There might have been something faint there, but my hand was trembling so much I couldn’t tell for sure.
Ryder reappeared, understandably agitated after his conversation with Drake.
“What did he say?” I asked.
“Wait for it.” His voice was flat. That was all he had a chance to say.
“What the fuck?” Drake’s voice boomed over the loudspeaker, sounding perfectly tyrannical. “What did he do?”
“Partied too much, we think. He’s just comatose,” Adam answered.
“We can’t have this! It’s bad enough we have all these holy rollers watching our every move! How are we supposed to be a commercially accepted band when parents won’t let their kids come to see us? The parents are the ones with the money. The show is still going on as planned tonight. Ryder will have to fill in the rhythm guitar parts.”
God forbid Drake lose a few dollars over the death or illness of a band member.
“Aren’t you going to do anything to help him? He needs to see a doctor at the very least.” I couldn’t keep quiet. If the rest of the band didn’t have the balls to stand up to Drake, I wasn’t going to let that stop me. I had enough blood on my hands already.
“Melanie, when you’re a part of this organization, you will be welcome to participate in our meetings. Don’t hold your breath waiting for that to happen. Of course we’ll get him to a doctor. I’m making plans to have him airlifted to Las Vegas as we speak. Not that it’s any of your concern.”
“Who is coming?” It was my concern. I was wanted, and we couldn’t exactly just call the authorities in and expect them not to notice I was here. And that was before you factored in the particulars of who you’d call for someone like Josiah. “If we call regular EMTs, what if they show up with the police?”
“I can’t call regular EMTs. I have people on payroll that are skilled in taking care of people with our condition. You’re not going anywhere, Melanie. You still have a job to do.”
I rolled my eyes and shook my head. I couldn’t resist the urge to flip off the ceiling. Everyone smirked and stifled laughter. I didn’t know if Drake could see us or not and I didn’t care.
“The medics will be here to bring Josiah to the heliport shortly. If anything else changes before they arrive, let me know. And for fuck’s sake, don’t anyone do anything else stupid!” Drake signed off, hanging up his microphone with a quick buzz of static. Somehow, his presence still filled the room, taking up air that I needed even if no one else did.
“Why don’t you guys try to get some rest before the show? You all look exhausted. I’ll sit with Josiah and deal with the medics.” The energy here was so bad, and Josiah must have been draining all of them.
Adam and Thomas’ faces both brightened. They thanked me and almost immediately climbed into their bunks. Ryder perched on the edge of Josiah’s bed next to me, looking over my shoulder at his friend.
“Go to bed,” I repeated.
“Are you sure, babe?” He asked. “This isn’t your problem.”
“I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. I know it’s not my problem. I don’t need a reason to want to help someone who needs help. And that includes you right now. You look like you’re ready to drop.”
“This is scary.” Ryder’s voice was low, I was sure the other two were lying in their bunks just as scared as he was, but no one wanted to admit it. “I feel like he’s draining the life out of me right along with him.”
“Do you think someone did something to him? I mean, between this and Rachel, weird things are happening lately.”
“I don’t know what to think.” Ryder sighed. “I’m hoping it’s just too much booze and not enough blood.”
I mashed my lips together, afraid to say what I was thinking. After a deep breath, I just went for it. “Would my blood be able to help him?”
Ryder’s mouth dropped slightly open, and he looked at me in a way he never had before. “I don’t know. I suppose it wouldn’t hurt to try it. If you’re cool with that, of course.”
I nodded. “I don’t want him to die.”
Without saying another word, Ryder lifted my hand from my lap and brought it up to his mouth. He sucked on my fingers, making me moan inappropriately, given the situation. When he’d summoned the blood to my fingertips, he sunk his teeth into my flesh. I jumped a little. He couldn’t resist drinking a little of it down. Warmth swirled from my fingers and throughout my body. I closed my eyes. When Ryder removed my finger from between his lips, I felt the warm slip of blood against my skin. He rested my finger against Josiah’s slightly parted lips.
I pushed my finger against his teeth to make sure the blood fell into his mouth. I looked alternately between Josiah and Ryder, waiting for something to happen.
The resurrection.
I wanted this to work so badly. For it to just be that simple. Drop by drop, my blood slowly dripped into his mouth. Would it ever be enough?
“Seriously, you should lie down,” I coaxed Ryder.
He shook his head. “I don’t know what’s going to happen. I don’t want to leave you alone.”
Any warmth I felt from Ryder drinking my blood was reduced to a shiver. Would Josiah attack me like a sick animal for trying to help him? Could he be reduced to such a primal creature?
I guess the answer was that he already was a primal creature. I liked to ignore the fact that I was in constant danger, enclosed on a bus with vampires.
But they could say the same of me. We were no different. They couldn’t control their thirst, and I couldn’t control my temper.
After what felt like hours but had to be more like many minutes, Josiah’s lips closed around my finger. He sucked on it weakly, like a lost traveler in the desert trying to conserve the last of his water. I tapped Ryder’s thigh with my free hand, smiling broadly. I didn’t want to startle Josiah into stopping what he was doing. Ryder’s face lit up and he smiled, realizing it might be working.