Nightingale Way: An Eternity Springs Novel (26 page)

“What do you … Oh.” Cam’s eyes widened. “You mean have a baby?”

“Yes. Give Devin and Lori a little brother or sister.”

Cam shoved his hands into the back pockets of his jeans and rolled back and forth on his heels. “Honestly, I don’t know. Babies are a lot of work. I don’t know if Sarah’s ready to jump back into that pool. With her mother at Keller Oaks and Lori away at school, she’s independent for the first time in her life. We haven’t talked about it.”

Cam’s gaze settled on Devin, who missed the ball Mac sent him and jogged to retrieve it. “I didn’t go through the baby stage with Devin, but I loved having a little kid around the house.”

Mac signaled to the teenager that he was taking a break, tucked his ball glove beneath his arm, and stepped nearer to Cam and Jack. “How old was he when you adopted him?”

“Five.” Cam spoke about the challenges of being a single father and observed aloud how hard single motherhood must have been for Sarah.

Twice Jack found Lauren’s name on his tongue, but both times he bit it back. He’d never told Cam about the baby. He’d never told another soul. Why, he’d never even said her name to Melinda. Even with Cat, she’d always been “the baby.” It hadn’t been until the day he first visited the cemetery and read the name carved on her headstone that she had become “Lauren” in his mind.

They all looked up when Gabe exited the clinic sans daughter. He said, “No baby yet, but they’re getting close. Mac, Ali asked me to tell you she needs to talk with you about something.”

Mac disappeared inside, then Devin drifted off with friends who were headed toward Angel Creek with fishing poles over their shoulders. Gabe approached Jack and Cam, who observed, “You lost someone.”

“Yep.” Gabe looked pleased. “Lots of women in there to fuss over her. I’m glad the Raffertys are having a boy. Numbers need some balance.” Gabe gave Jack a slyly innocent look and said, “Your Cat sure likes cuddling on my little girls.”

And right then, in this town, at this moment, in front of these two men, the time was finally right. “We had a little girl. Her name was Lauren. She was stillborn.”

In the beat of silent shock that followed the announcement, Cam’s jaw gaped. “A baby? You had a baby? Jack, you never told me that.”

“I don’t talk about it. Well, at least, I haven’t talked about her before now.”

“When did this happen?”

Jack named the date and he saw it register on Gabe’s face. Gabe had been mired in his own issues at that point. He put his hand on Jack’s shoulder and squeezed it. “I’m sorry, man. Losing a child … it’s bad. It just sucks. I know I’ll have a hole in my heart until the day I
die over losing Matt. I’m so sorry you and Cat went through that.”

That’s when Jack made another confession he had never expected to admit. “I was away on the job when Cat lost her. When I came home … I handled it poorly. I couldn’t fix it. I couldn’t give Cat what she needed.”

The men stared at him in sympathetic silence until Gabe came to his rescue. “I get it, man. Believe me, I get it. But there really isn’t a ‘right’ way to handle it, because the whole thing isn’t ‘right.’ Don’t hold yourself to some standard that doesn’t exist, Jack. Sometimes shit happens, and when it does, you just have to batten down the hatches and hold on until the storm is over.”

“Sometimes the ship breaks up before the seas calm,” Cam, the sailor, observed. “Is that what happened to the two of you?”

“Part of it. The biggest part of it, I think.”

“Because you lost the baby, or because of the way you reacted?” Gabe asked.

“Because we had trouble getting pregnant, because we lost her once we finally managed step number one, and because Cat and I mourned differently. And, to be perfectly honest, the baby wasn’t real to me right from the first like she was with Cat. Love wasn’t my first reaction when she said the stick turned blue.”

“Fear,” Gabe said.

“Oh, yeah,” Cam replied. “When Sarah told me about Lori, I shook so hard my leg chains rattled.”

“They put you in leg chains in juvie jail?” Jack asked, momentarily distracted.

“Nah. I was speaking figuratively.”

“I didn’t understand that I’d fallen in love with the baby until after she was gone,” Jack explained. “Cat and I were both screwed up and we couldn’t lean on each other. We grew so apart that there was no going back.”

“What about now?” Gabe asked. “You’ve found your way back together in some respects.”

“One very important respect,” Cam added, giving a wolfish grin.

Jack considered the question. Where did they stand after last night? They’d stayed out beside the pool until almost midnight, then returned to the house and made slow, sweet love before falling asleep together. Conversation this morning had remained light and general. It was almost as if they needed to catch their breath after the emotional drain of the previous day.

And yet, something had healed between the two of them last night, forgiveness offered and accepted. It was important. He’d needed it, and he thought she’d needed it, too.

So, now what? Where did they go from here? She’d wanted to spend some time sifting through the ashes. To his mind, they’d pretty much taken care of that last night. He loved her. He wanted her.

Did he want to remarry her?

Whoa. That was a big, hairy question. Did they dare go down that road again? Yes, they’d finally mourned their child together, but what else had truly changed? He still had a job she hated. Hell, she’d hate his job now ten times more than the job he’d had when they were married. Even if the job didn’t cause a problem, what about the baby issue? Would she want to try to have kids again? Would he? Fertility wouldn’t be any easier now that they were five years older.

He exhaled a heavy breath. Maybe that stack of ashes was deeper than he thought.

The front door of the clinic opened and Sarah Reese stuck her head out. “He’s here!”

The baby’s arrival rescued Jack from the troubling questions, and what followed was a celebration the likes of which Jack had never experienced. Colt emerged
from the birthing room to briefly show off a healthy eight-pound, seven-ounce bundle of boy with a head full of red hair and lungs that didn’t quit. Colton Alexander Rafferty. Colt looked exhausted, excited, and elated, and watching him, Jack experienced envy greater than any he’d known before.

He glanced up to see Cat looking at him, her eyes watery but warm. Standing beside him, Cam noticed, too. He leaned over and murmured, “You know, cuz, I discovered that a man can go home again. Maybe you can, too.”

The next ten days passed swiftly as the excitement in town began shifting away from the arrival of Eternity Springs’s newest resident and toward the wedding of its favorite daughter to its redeemed rogue. Having been denied the big wedding she’d dreamed of as a girl, Sarah was going traditional all the way, including a long bachelorette weekend. She’d spent a considerable amount of time deciding what she wanted the theme of her party to be, and once it was done, she’d turned the planning over to Nic.

“The theme of the weekend is adventure,” she told Cat when she stopped by the
Eternity Times
office to invite her along. “I’ve known Sarah most of my life, so I’ve come up with the perfect plan. We’re leaving early Friday morning and returning on Sunday.”

The sparkle of excitement in Nic’s eyes made Cat wary. “We’re not talking male hookers and blow, now, are we?” she teased, though a serious question lay beneath it. “Just what sort of adventure are we talking about?”

Nic laughed. “We’re talking motorcycles, zip lines, and the Wild, Wild West.”

“For motorcycles and zip lines, I’m with you. Could use a little more detail when it comes to the Wild West. I’m just over a firebombing incident, you know.”

Nic dismissed her concern with a wave. “It’s a mystery dinner place over toward Durango. Steampunk, southern-Colorado-Gold-Rush style, and you go in costume. It’s role-playing.”

“Ah, the
movie
called
Wild, Wild West
.”

“Actually, Sarah loved the television show reruns growing up. She had a thing for Robert Conrad because he wore tight pants.”

“Sounds like fun.” Cat hadn’t been on a girls’ weekend since college. “Count me in.”

“Excellent. Especially since I already ordered your costume.”

“Oh? Dare I ask what?”

“I couldn’t help myself. I saw it in the catalogue and it just seemed too perfect. You’re going to be Miss Kitty.”

“A cat costume?”

“Miss Kitty as in
Gunsmoke
.”

“A saloon girl. Well, it’s always been a secret desire of mine. I always thought Marshal Dillon was hot.”

“You must watch old TV shows, too.”

“I’m a sucker for
Gilligan’s Island
.” She propped her elbow on her desk and rested her head in her palm. “So, who are you going as?”

“Now, I’m not going to spoil the surprise. They’re all fun costumes, I promise.”

“Fair enough.” Cat’s thoughts strayed to Jack, who, as Cam’s best man, would be in charge of a bachelor party. She could easily picture him flying the guys to Monte Carlo to go gambling. “So, what are they doing for Cam’s party?”

“A golf weekend at Pebble Beach. It’s a lovely place—Gabe and I honeymooned there—and I do think it’s cool that Jack has a house there, but we’re going to have so much more fun.”

Cat didn’t know Jack had a house at Pebble Beach. “Are they going this weekend, too?”

“Yes.”

“What are you doing with the babies?”

“My mother and aunt are coming in and they’re going to stay through to the wedding. Sage is going to have to miss the party, of course. I feel bad for her, but not too bad. Colton Alexander is such a little doll. Her sister, Rose, was going to go, but she’s scheduled to man the clinic for the weekend and couldn’t find a sub. So it’ll be Ali, Celeste, you, and me.”

“Sarah’s daughter won’t be in for it?”

“Lori isn’t arriving until Sunday evening. She’s the maid of honor, but she didn’t really mind missing this part of the wedding festivities. She and Sarah both agreed it would be weird for Sarah to have to worry about being a mom at her own bachelorette party.”

“That’s understandable. So, what do I need to bring?”

“I’m having the costumes delivered to the bed-and-breakfast where we’re staying, so you won’t need to worry about that. Pack light … but be sure to bring your sense of adventure!”

That’s how Cat came to be riding a Honda Gold Wing motorcycle through the Rocky Mountains on a beautiful summer morning. The bikes were rentals, except for Celeste’s—she drove her own—and Cat was surprised to learn that of all the girls, she apparently had the least experience riding a bike. “I’m almost embarrassed about it,” she confessed during one of their breaks.

“It’s because of Celeste,” Ali explained. “She challenges you to attempt things you’d never dream of trying otherwise.”

“She’s our hero,” Sarah added, throwing an arm around the older woman’s shoulders.

Celeste laughed. “I’ve lived longer than you all. I’ve had time to try more things.”

They stayed overnight in a bed-and-breakfast and sat
up late watching the DVDs of the TV show
Wild, Wild West
that Nic had brought.

The alarm sounded too early for Cat the next morning, and she had to drag herself from bed. Riding a motorcycle might be exhilarating, but it wasn’t easy on the glutes. Nevertheless, by the time they arrived at the zip line site, she felt mellow and relaxed.

Then she spied a span of cable strung high above the forest floor and watched as a man strapped into what she considered minimal gear and hanging from a pulley mechanism stepped off a metal platform encircling a Ponderosa pine and soared through the forest. “I’m the bride-to-be,” Sarah said. “Is it wrong of me to point out that the dude who just zipped past has a very fine ass?”

“Not at all, dear,” Celeste said. “This is your bachelorette weekend, after all.”

“Married doesn’t equal dead,” Nic agreed.

“It was definitely a fine ass,” Ali added.

Staring upward as a woman stepped off the platform and zipped along the line, Celeste observed, “How cool is that?”

“Have you ever gone soaring before?”

“Not like this, no.”

“It’s a long way up there,” Ali said, her tone a bit doubtful.

“You going chicken on us?” Sarah asked.

“No. Not at all. I’ve wanted to give this a try ever since I heard about it.” She winced slightly as she added, “It’s just awfully high.”

Cat stared up at the treetop platform and wondered what she’d gotten herself into. “I went parasailing one time,” Nic said. “That was fun.”

“There’s nothing like flying,” Celeste agreed. “Hang gliding is fun, too.”

“You amaze me, Celeste.”

Celeste gave her a pointed look as she donned her
safety helmet. “Life is too valuable to waste on being dull.”

“Leap like a lunatic,” Sarah added. “That was her advice to me, and I have taken it to heart.” Flashing her friends a grin, she added, “That’s why I’m going first.”

As a hoist lifted her up to the platform, she let out a whoop.

For the next few hours, they played like children. After learning the ropes, so to speak, on the first few runs, they began getting more adventurous, lying flat in the air, doing twists and flips and whatever other tricks they could come up with. The parallel racing lines proved to be the most popular, with Ali showing a seriously competitive streak, winning the head-to-head competition with Cat coming in second. Everyone agreed that the bride-to-be won the trick competition. “Sarah is so short that it gives her an unfair advantage,” Nic complained.