No Quarter (NOLA's Own #2) (12 page)

Phil pretty much had told me the same thing.

“All I could do was hold him and tell him it would be okay. He made me swear never to speak of it to anyone. I swore to that, and until this very minute, I never did. But you already know what Jason said, and yeah, I guess from his point of view, it
was
like that. Phil was destroyed that night. I didn’t know him before, but from what I’ve gathered from the other guys, he changed after that.”

“Like how?”

“I guess he was a sweet guy, really considerate of others, easygoing—like how he is
now
. I guess he became a huge asshole. He could be very cruel, very mean, especially toward other girls. When he finished with them, they would know it, and it sometimes got ugly. Not physically. He never hit anyone until he mashed Jace’s face in—at least that
I
know of. But he could be pretty nasty with some of the groupies.”

“Oh.”

“Losing you that night brought out a darkness inside him. It was probably always there, but when you took your light with you, he had none left in himself. Does that make sense?”

“Sure.”

“I know that, after we got to Europe, he got involved in some hardcore shit. We met…some people,” she said carefully, looking as though she was trying to find a way to tell me but not tell me too much. “They were dark and dangerous, and that was how he was feeling. I’m not exactly sure what went on with him during that period, but I think he got into some bizarre, freaky shit. Jason and I tried some stuff out, and he and this other guy would tag along—”

“Other guy?”

“Yeah…has he told you any of this?”

I shook my head. “No. I guess you shouldn’t tell me then.”

“He’ll tell you eventually. He wants to be open with you.”

“This other guy though…was it like…bisexual experimentation or something?”

Sheri snorted with laughter. “Oh, no, nothing like that. Phil is just very comfortable with his sexuality. It’s only ever been about women with him. But I don’t know if I should mention who this other guy is. I only know that he introduced Phil to some hardcore sex shit, and it didn’t help the darkness in him. So, I guess just consider this a heads-up.”

“Other Guy is a famous person, isn’t he?”

“You could say that.”

I nodded. “Yeah…”

“I love all of them, Kenna. They’re my family, my boys. I don’t want you to think badly about any of them. What I did with them, what I did
for
them…I don’t regret it. But I do wish I had taken into consideration what the future would hold for all of us. Jason and I are together now. We really have been from the get-go—not necessarily monogamous, but always together.”

“Are you monogamous now?”

“Yes—at least, I think so. I guess that’s another thing we’ll have to talk about. I
think
he wants that. And I’m going to see a shrink and talk about my own issues with that. I have my first session tonight.”

“That’s fantastic!” I told her.

She smiled. “I think so, too. I need it. I think our relationship could use all the help it can get.”

“I think you guys will be just fine,” I told her honestly. “I get the feeling he’d walk on water for you, if you told him to.”

“I’d do the same for him. But I also know my head isn’t always the healthiest environment. With therapy, I’ll know what to do when it’s not.”

“Good for you. You seem to be in a much better place, more comfortable with yourself.”

“I am. And I want to keep it that way.”

Her phone beeped next to her plate, and she checked the text message. “Oh! They’ve decided on a warehouse to buy!”

“Is it Jason?”

“Yeah. They went over there to check it out after Phil came back this morning. It’s about a mile from the clinic.” She raised her eyes to me and smirked. “Phil just wants to be as close to you as he can. He was all grumpy after you left today. He had to do an hour workout to get it out of his system.”

“Dork,” I huffed.

“You do funny things to that man, Kenna. He wants to be the best of everything—the best lead singer, the best-looking body, the best whatever—so that you can be proud of him.”

“I am proud of him, but he should be doing it for himself, not me.”

“But if he’s doing it for you and it makes you happy, then
he
is happy, so he’s doing it for himself anyway.”

“Whatever,” I retorted, but I was grinning from ear to ear.

Before I headed home after work, I dropped by the hardware store. I hadn’t told Phil or my roommates, but I wanted him to have his own key to my house. Given a selection of designs—
who knew?
—I chose a black metal tone that had a small skull-and-crossbones pattern on it. It seemed appropriate.

Back home, I dug around in my closet and found an old gift box and a bow to place on top of it. The things I’d said to him, about sometimes feeling overwhelmed and needing to take a step back, I knew that had hurt him. This small cheap gift of my house key was to reassure him that, though sometimes I might feel that way, it didn’t mean I’d do anything about it. I wasn’t going to run or back out of this. I was in this with him the whole way, and giving him unlimited access to me and my home was a way of letting him know that.

I heard the front door open, and Alys’s voice came up the stairs. “Sweet Pea? Are you home?”

“Yeah! Up here!”

Placing the key in the box, I put it on the nightstand just as Alys walked in.

“What’s that?” she asked, eyeing it with interest.

“A present for Phil, if you and Lili are cool with it.”

“Huh?”

“It’s a key to the house. I thought he’d like that. You don’t mind, do you?”

“It’ll save him from breaking the door down,” she joked.

Our gazes met, and she was bubbling over with some sort of excitement.

“Did Phil tell you about…” She was a little breathless.

Oh, yeah!
“LA? The House of—”

“Horrors!” she finished with a squeak.

“Did you tell Lili?”

“No! You?”

“No! X told you she’s going though?”

“No! She’s coming, too?”

“Phil said so.”

“
Oh my God! I am so fucking psyched for this
!” she screamed.

It had been more than twenty-four hours since I found out myself, and I had almost forgotten about it, but the rush of excitement infected me once more.

“I know! It’s fucking awesome!” I screamed back.

Suddenly, we were jumping around, hugging each other, squealing wildly.

“What the hell is going on?” yelled Lili from the bedroom door.

“NOLA’s Junk is taking us to LA for the House of Horrors show!” Alys yelled back at her.

“Oh my God! That’s
awesome
!”

“And you’re coming, too!” I said. “They’ve already got the flight and hotel booked!”

Her face froze in the most comical look of incredulousness.

“Shut the fuck up!” She joined in with the jumping and squealing, too. “I have to tell Lewis! He’s going to
freak
!”

Laughing, I asked, “He’s a fan then?”

“Hells yes, he is! He’s dying to meet the guys, but I told him he has to meet you first.”

“So, it’s serious then?” I asked, attempting to sound blasé.

Smiling brightly, she replied, “I suppose it is. You’re meeting him on Wednesday for Mom’s anniversary.”

I blinked at her in surprise. “What?”

“Wednesday? Six years, right? I made him book us a table at The Duck Pond—”

I gasped. “
The Duck Pond
?
That Asian-fusion restaurant, run by Lew—” I stared at her in absolute shock. “Shut the fuck up. You’re dating
Lewis Lee
? As in the hottest, baddest, most gorgeous chef and darling star of the fucking Food Network? Owner of The Duck Pond among many other restaurants around the nation?
That
Lewis?”

She smiled cheekily. “Yep. And I told him that it’s a big deal, this anniversary, so he booked us a table.”

“Holy
shit
, Lili,” I said weakly.

Lewis Lee was one of my heroes, an idol of mine on the subject of food. He was twenty-seven and half-Welsh, half-Chinese, and he hailed from San Francisco. He had several cooking shows and guest spots on many more. Known for making some of the most amazing desserts and pastries, he’d started out with French cuisine, but he’d become more and more interested in healthy organic food and promoted it constantly.

He was stunning, too. His features were very Asian, but he had a pair of aquamarine eyes that were jaw-droppingly beautiful. Plus, he was
loaded
with tattoos. I had always had a little crush on him, and if Phil didn’t exist, I would’ve had a
big
crush on him.

Within the last year, he’d opened up his Asian-fusion restaurant, The Duck Pond, and I’d been foaming at the mouth to go, but there was a three-month waiting list.

“He was more than happy to do so.”

“Really?” I breathed. “
Wow
, Lili—”

“I know, I know. You’re secretly in love with him a little, and you totally hero-worship him. It’s only fair, I suppose, since I’ve always thought Phil was a knockout.” She plopped her butt down on the bed. “I wanted to surprise you, but I guess your reaction was good enough. I mean, when I met him, I was floored because you’d kept forcing me to watch his damn cooking shows, and
poof
, there he was, asking to buy me a drink. I’m actually surprised Alys didn’t blab.”

“I told you I wouldn’t!” Alys snapped hotly.

“Yeah, yeah.” Lili waved her hand to tell her to simmer down. “So, yeah, I’m seeing Lewis Lee, and his cooking is just as awesome as you thought it would be, Kenna. And he would love nothing more than to cook for us on Wednesday.”

“I totally forgot about Mom’s anniversary,” I confessed, a little horrified.

“Yeah, well, it’s easy to see why,” said Alys, laughing.

Every year, we would go out to mark the death of my mother and celebrate her life and everything she had given to us. For me to forget…that stung a little.

“You’re starting to heal,” said Alys, wrapping her slender fingers around my wrist. “That’s all. It’s not like you’ve forgotten her. It’s just that Phil has made you feel good again. There’s nothing wrong with that.”

I nodded. “She once told me that I would one day wake up and not remember the pain of her dying, but of the love and happiness we had together.”

“She was right,” said Alys softly. “She was
always
right.”

“I’d like for Sheri to come with us, if you don’t mind,” I told them, looking at Lili in particular. “Would that be possible?”

“I don’t see why not,” she replied. “I think we have a pretty big table reserved.”

“Sheri needs us, you guys. I think she’d really appreciate it if we included her in something like this.”

“Her own mother was such a horrible piece of shit. Maybe she’ll feel the love Laurie gave to us, and that’ll make her feel good, too. Mom would’ve wanted to heal Sheri with her whole heart,” Alys said.

“I’ll tell Lewis then. I’m staying over at his place tonight. The restaurant is closed on Mondays and Tuesdays.”

“When are you heading out?” I asked.

“Soon. He’s making me dinner, authentic Chinese something or other. Noodles. I know he’s making noodles.”

That made me crack up. “At least you love to eat. It’s a good thing you found a man who wants to cook for you.”

“I know, right? I’m so afraid I’ll screw this up somehow—or start to get fat off his food or something. I really,
really
like him. If he makes me fat and then doesn’t want to sleep with me anymore…I don’t know what I’ll do.”

“Start going to the gym, and don’t eat anything else the rest of the day,” I said, laughing. As a nutritionist, I in no way condoned such a diet.

“And be sweet and caring, so he’ll
fall in love
with you. Maybe watch your smart mouth,” suggested Alys.

Lili’s face turned sulky. “Lewis likes my smart mouth.”

Lili ended up having no problem with me giving Phil a house key. After she headed out, I took a quick shower, and then Alys and I walked over to the Plantation House via the back gate. She had her overnight bag with her, so that meant Phil and I would have the house to ourselves.

“So, everything going good with you and X?” I asked quietly as I opened the side gate.