No Such Thing As True Love (2 page)

            Maritess had to slow down her instruction, and decided to just pretend like she was talking to a child. He was by no means a stupid man, but he just wasn’t connecting with his body in any healthy way that would avoid him future injury. She explained why they stretched each muscle that they did, in the order in which they did so. By the end of their stretching, Markus was ready for a break. She laughed as she led him to the treadmills. Markus shook his head in protest. Running had never been one of his strong points, and besides, he wanted to build muscle. He did not, however, want to feel like a gerbil spinning in a wheel while getting even thinner. Maritess ignored his protests, and continued as if he had been excited to see the stationary running machines.

            “Even though your main goal is to build muscle,” she said pleasantly, “your body must first be at a point where it is turned on and working, but not working too hard. Fitness is about more than weight and muscle. Just like stretching, you have to add cardio to weight training as well. Now, pay attention to your heart rate. There’s a chart on the wall that will tell you where you want your ideal heart rate to be to best utilize your exercise time. Now, go.” Maritess turned on the machine. Markus had to leap to keep up with it at first, but eventually found a rhythm. He expected Maritess to run on the machine next to him, kind of like a motivating exercise buddy. Instead, she stood studying his form, and randomly adjusted the speed and resistance of the machine. After a few minutes, Markus was getting a second wind. He decided to try talking to her since her observant silence was starting to make him feel self-conscious.

            “So, how long have you been in the fitness industry?” he asked through labored breaths. Maritess barely looked into his eyes before answering.

            “No talking right now, Markus. I need you to focus on your body so that you know what it feels like to be in a good zone,” she said indifferently. Her response didn’t help settle Markus. If anything, her lack of communication was making it more difficult for him to focus on his body. Just like the journaling, Markus was again re-thinking the gym’s placement in his strategy for happiness.

            When her test on the treadmill was finally completed, Markus was relieved to see that they were headed to the weight rooms. The short time he spent with Maritess was enough to make him halt himself from running towards the giant dumbbells like a kid in a candy store. Of course, instead of anything he would have chosen for himself, Maritess led him to a rack of small hand weights. He stood by her side, trying to ignore the dozen or so other men in the weight room all hard at work to maintain their build. He crossed his arms and bit his lip as she studied him before reaching for a set of weights on the rack.

            The weights were five pounds per piece. Markus was offended, and showed so in the disbelieving look on his face. Maritess rolled her eyes, and forced one of the weights into each of his hands. She offered no explanation as she stood behind him and began to instruct on the exercise.

            “Now, keep the weights in your firsts,” she said as she kicked his feet to shoulder width apart, “Lift your arms out to the side. Keep them straight, and don’t go any higher than your shoulders.” She stopped his arms when they reached the proper height and made him hold the weights there. “Go slowly,” she said, “That’s one. You have nineteen more.”

...

CHAPTER 3

            By the fifteenth rep, Markus was starting to have some respect for the red-headed trainer. His shoulders, chest, back and arms were aching, and he still had five left to do. By the time he made it through twenty reps of ten pounds, he was completely wiped. Maritess made him do a few reps of leg presses, and then they were back in the cardio area. This time, she got on the treadmill next to him. Together, they walked at a leisurely pace, and Maritess let a bit of the professional ice melt off.

            “So, you wrote down on your questionnaire that you are looking for love and happiness. Tell me more about that. What is it you think you don’t already have?” she asked him, she was very personable when she wanted to be, and it was easy for Markus to respond. The words had been clamoring around in his head long enough, it was nice to have someone else to share them with.

            “Well, a wife for one,” he said as he looked at her. She didn’t blush or even smile, just nodded for him to continue. Markus cleared his throat before he went on, “About two months ago, my fiancé broke up with me. She had a good reason, but it wasn’t something that I could control.” He looked around the gym in search of a way to say his next thought. Maritess listened patiently when he found it. “I can’t have kids of my own, just can’t. It’s no big deal. At least, it’s not for me and she always said it wasn’t for her, either. I figured that there were therapies and stuff, lots of kids need homes already, so I didn’t really see her break-down coming. So, since then I guess I’ve decided that she just wasn’t the one for me,” Markus laughed a little to lighten the mood. “I guess you could say that I’m on a quest for the real me, and the perfect woman for
that
me. I really thought I loved her, but, you know… I don’t think it was real, and I want real,” Markus looked down and saw the number on the heart rate indicator start to rise. He shook his head and looked over at Maritess. She was absorbing what he said, and deciding which direction to go with it.

            “So… what? Getting into a gym is your way of putting yourself out there?” she asked, a little more incredulously than Markus would have expected. Markus shook his head, relieved that she seemed not to quite get what he was saying.

            “No, not putting myself out there, more like enhancing myself. It’s one of my goals. I figured that I had always just reacted. Now, I want to… I don’t know…
act
. So, I have a list of goals in my mission, and I think that if I follow them, then I’ll achieve my goals,” Markus said. He was satisfied with his response and looked to Maritess for a reaction.

            Maritess nodded her head, and looked as if she understood. But when she answered, “So, goal one is to get in shape, and goal two is to find the girl of your dreams. Right?” he shook his head again, expressing his disapproval of her thought process.

            “It’s more than that, though,” he said as he stopped the treadmill and stepped off. He stood in the space between their two machines. Maritess stopped hers as well, but stayed on. She was at eye level with Markus as she cut him off.

            “No, it’s not more than that, though,” she said, “I see a ton of guys like you every month, and that’s okay! You’re on the right track. Getting in shape is a great way to build confidence. But confidence is what will ultimately land you your ‘dream girl’, not just bulky muscles. And your quest for ‘true love’, well, that will probably come in the form of the first girl who notices your efforts starting to show through your white, button-down, work shirt. La-di-da it goes, until, what do you know? Here you are again, to get back into shape because your newly-found former true love wasn’t really the one, either. That’s because what you’re looking for doesn’t exist. So, let me save you the trouble. This first session is free. If you want to change your life, then change
your
life. Training is hard, these sessions are hard. There are easier ways to meet girls who don’t cost the rates we charge. So, if you attend your next session, I will take that to mean that you are committed to your health and fitness, no matter whether
true love
comes your way, or doesn’t. I’ll help you with those goals, but as far as I’m concerned the pursuit of someone’s perfect match is ridiculous. Life is what you make it. This is about you. Do you see where I’m coming from, Markus?”

            He was stunned almost speechless by the distaste he suddenly felt for her. She took a sentiment that had taken him a long time to articulate, and turned it into some shallow endeavor. At first, he didn’t even want to answer her. Even if he wanted to continue training, there was no way he was going to do so at this woman’s club. Markus was so caught off guard by Maritess’ response that he could only stand there staring at her with his arms crossed against his chest. The expectant expression she wore on her face was only making him angrier. He was paying this woman to help him get in shape, not give him life advice. He shook his head, and smiled a defensive smile as he looked around the room in disbelief. Her words sunk farther into his head, and one thought burst from his mouth without his permission.

            “What do you mean that you think looking for your perfect match is ridiculous?” Markus hadn’t really taken the time to wonder whether it was appropriate or not, but he waited for her answer. Maritess laughed at him, stepped off the machine and ushered him to follow her out of the cardio area. He was frustrated, but followed her anyway. Markus had no intention of letting her slide on an answer. What? Was she heartbroken, or something? Even if she were, it was still no reason to say that to someone else, especially if finding a match was an important part of their lives at the moment. While walking behind her, he just wasn’t angry enough to ignore the way her gym clothes hugged her hips and how her sneakers hit just below a set of perfect ankles.

            They walked into the club’s juice bar. Maritess ordered a shake for each of them, not bothering to ask what flavor Markus liked. When the order was up, she walked them over to a table and sat down. “Look, Markus,” she said, “I didn’t mean to offend you. I just needed to make sure you are here for the right reasons. Being a member at a gym and getting personal training isn’t going to turn you into a chick magnet. If that’s what you’re looking for, you’re wasting your money. I mean, I wish you luck and everything, but I do think it’s ridiculous for someone to want perfection out of another human being.”

            Markus took a drink of the shake. It was delicious, and something he would have probably chosen anyway. He looked at Maritess, his anger was fading, but he still wasn’t sure if he really liked this woman. “I don’t want perfection,” he said simply.

            “Sure, you do,” she replied, “You want someone who will perfectly conform to you. I think that’s ridiculous. Say you met someone who was your perfect match in every way, except that she had a physical feature that you found completely unattractive. Then what?”

            “Well, I don’t think it would matter much by then. The fact that she matched me every other way would make up for it,” he answered.

            “Okay, well what if the unattractive physical feature was easily seen? Maybe you wouldn’t have approached her at all. Then you would have missed your perfect match. Markus, that means that you would be doomed to a lifetime of searching for something you already rejected as an impossibility. Like I said, it’s ridiculous,” Maritess was stubborn, but amused at their little debate.

            “It’s not ridiculous. Okay, so maybe there’s not just one specific person for every other person on the planet, but I know what I’m looking for,” he punctuated his retort by leaning back in his chair and taking another pull from his straw.

            Maritess nodded in concession, “Then what are you looking for?” Markus ran his fingers through his hair. The workout had left him feeling refreshed, instead of wiped like it normally would have. He looked at Maritess, trying to identify her motives. She seemed to be simply curious, so he decided to indulge her. Markus revealed many of the small desires he had for his ideal woman. It was mostly simple things, like living habits and hobbies. Maritess was pushed to laughter at a couple of his requirements, but the conversation flowed easily. For such a scrawny-looking guy, Maritess was surprised that he seemed to have pretty much everything thought out. While she wasn’t necessarily attracted to him, she did kind of wonder why he was having such a hard time on the dating scene.

            “So, what have you tried so far?” she asked, wondering about all the dating services that she saw advertised all over the place. She thought definitely, that if he didn’t want to go trolling around in bars or at the office, something like that might help. Sure enough, online matchmakers were his first entrance into the dating scene even before he had met his former fiancé. He said it had taken him more than a week until he was happy enough with his profile to post it. The few contacts that had turned into dates ended up to be nightmares. Markus told Maritess about one woman who wanted so eagerly to have a family that she started dropping hints about compensating Markus financially. When he told her about his issue with the subject, she ran from the restaurant yelling about fraud. Maritess laughed at his stories, and noticed the time well after their session had expired.