Novak Raven (Harper's Mountains Book 4) (6 page)

She couldn’t do it. Why couldn’t she Change? The raven was right there, scratching at her skin, cawing to be released, but Avery’s body wasn’t working. Maybe it was the alcohol, or that she was so angry and hurt.

Sobbing, she drew her knees up to her chest as the water drops that made it through the thick tree canopy
drip-dripped
onto her legs and head. Of course it would start raining right now.

She’d been so fucking hopeful. So determined to make things work here so she wouldn’t have to return to Raven’s Hollow with her tail feathers tucked between her legs. She’d wanted to live outside of that awful place and make a life for herself that she could be proud of, but tonight was the night. It was the night she had to take stock of where she really was, and that was in a muddy hole, chin deep and still sinking.

She was out of money, sleeping in her car, fucking hungry, and Weston hated her. She hadn’t had a decent balanced meal in way too long. And to top it all off, her damn car broke down. It just puttered and sputtered until the gas pedal wouldn’t work anymore and her muddy hole had finally swallowed her up completely.

“Avery?”

She gasped and startled hard. She hadn’t even heard Weston approach through the spattering of raindrops on leaves. “Don’t look at me!”

She had heightened night vision, and right now, Weston’s eyes were green like forest moss. Concern flitted across his face. Instead of turning away, he pulled her up out of the mud and asked, “Did you already Change, darlin’?”

She was shaking now, from cold, adrenaline, and something more. Darlin’? She liked the way that word rolled off his tongue. Weston’s gaze was locked on hers, and for the first time since she’d come here, they weren’t full of hatred. Her white cotton sundress was mud-splattered but draped over his arm, and without a word, he knelt down and held her panties out, waiting for her to step into them.

Mortified, she dipped her feet into them quickly, but he was slow and methodical as he gently pulled them up her legs, the knuckles of his thumbs brushing her bare thighs. When he stood, his attention dipped to her breasts and held there for a few seconds before he forced his darkening eyes back to hers and rushed to pull her dress over her head. Slowly, he spun her and zipped the back, dragging his fingertip up her spine as he went, sending a delicious shiver up her body.

He released her too soon, and she stumbled forward slightly without his strong hands on her. Not ready to face the mess that was her car, Avery sank back down to the forest floor and rested her back against the rough bark of a tree. “How did you find me?” She wasn’t exactly right off the road. She’d run for a while to get here.

“Uuuh,” Weston drawled, taking a seat next to her—
right
next to her! “My dad was a tracker.”

“Beaston?” she asked quietly.

“Yeah.”

“He terrifies me.”

“You’ve never met him.”

“He terrifies all ravens.”

“Yeah, well he terrifies most predator shifters, too,” Weston said with a soft chuckle. “Not me, though. He was just Da to me. He taught me to track. And not only through woods. I can find people who don’t want to be found.”

“You should’ve been a private investigator.”

“Tracking down cheating housewives doesn’t exactly call to me,” he said grimly.

“Right.” Avery’s voice was hitching with those uncontrollable breaths that came after a good cry.

“I have to ask you something,” Weston said low. “I’ll only ask this one time, and whatever you tell me, I’ll try my best to understand. Please, just…tell me the truth.”

“How could I tell you anything else? You can hear lies.”

Weston smiled sadly at her in the dim light. “Did you know?”

Avery’s breath hitched again on the inhale. “Did I know what?”

“Did you know the council was using you to get to me?”

Avery searched his face to make sure he was being serious, but the hardness was back in his eyes. “Why would the council try to get to you?”

“Avery, I know. I know everything. I know about why you were born.”

“Why I was…? Weston, tell me what you’re talking about.”

“The council encouraged your mom to get pregnant when my mom was. They were friends, and the council wanted you to lure me to Raven’s Hollow. Did you know about that?”

“No,” she whispered, horrified.

“Did you know the council was reading the letters I sent you?”

Avery shook her head slowly. This wasn’t real. “Of course not. I hid them behind a loose brick in the fireplace in my room. Those were my letters, not for anyone else. I even brought them here with me so that no one would ever find them.”

Weston’s chest was heaving now with every inhale. “Avery, yes or no. I can’t… Did you know you were bait for me? Please.”

“No! No, no, no,” she murmured, her face crumpling. Was the moisture on her cheeks rain or tears? She didn’t know, nor did she care. He was being mean again. The council had nothing to do with her feelings for Weston. Nothing at all. She was born to bait him? Avery covered her face with her hands to hide from him because now she knew why he was staring at her. He was trying to gauge if she was putting on a show, and she hated this. She wanted to tell him to fuck off again. She wanted to spit in his face or maybe slap him with her fingers clawed.

But something horrifying was happening in her chest right now. Such a sick feeling of rightness slid over her as she really considered what he’d just said.

Did her mother have her to be a lure for Weston? Was that the reason for her existence? Her father hadn’t ever given a single, solitary shit about her, especially when her broken raven had got him stripped of his rank. But mom was different. She loved her. She had her because she wanted a baby to care for…right?

“Can I borrow your phone?” she asked, her voice trembling like the raindrop-battered leaves around them.

Without a word, Weston pulled his phone out of his back pocket and laid it in her outstretched palm. She dialed home from memory and waited the three rings it took Mom to pick up.

“Hello?” It was hard to hear because there was so much talking in the background—men’s murmured voices.

“Mom, it’s me.”

Immediately, Mom’s voice dipped to a whisper. “Avery, this isn’t a good time.”

“Is the council at your house?”

“What?” A beat of silence, then, “How did you know? Are you back in The Hollow?” Mom was probably at the window, peeking through the blinds.

“I need to ask you something.”

“I can’t really talk right now. Your father, he’s… I can’t talk.”

“That’s fine, then just answer my question yes or no, okay?”

Mom didn’t answer, but that was fine.

“Am I bait for the Novak Raven?”

More silence.

“Mom? You owe me this. Just tell me. Am I bait for the Novak Raven?”

“Y-yes,” Mom stuttered out. Her voice had gone all soft.

In that moment, Avery’s heart broke. She’d thought this thing with Weston, this innate instinct to be close to him, was her own doing. It was her heart latching onto a man she cared for, but it wasn’t just her in this. How much of her feelings were from manipulation from the people who were supposed to protect her? From the people who were supposed to love her?

“How long?” she whispered.

Mom’s breath was hitching, as though she was about to sob.

“Please tell me,” Avery begged,
needing
to know. “How long have I been the lure?”

“For always.”

Avery gasped and hung up the phone, handed it to Weston in a rush so she didn’t have to touch the damn thing anymore. This couldn’t be happening. But then, a hundred things made sense at once. Dad always taking secret meetings. Mom’s relieved smile whenever Avery had brought up Weston’s name throughout the years. The constant encouragement to rekindle a relationship with him. The council asking her questions about the Novak Raven when she was younger. So many meetings to interview her. The feeling that she didn’t belong, like she was just an object. So many times she’d been pulled from school, or from her life, for meetings with the council. She’d thought it was because of her broken raven, so they could make sure she was progressing like she was supposed to, but now that she looked back, it was so obvious. Her meetings always ended with discussions about the Novak Raven. And she’d answered because she’d trusted her people. She’d trusted them to have her best interest in mind, and honestly, it felt good to openly talk about how much she liked Weston. How much she respected him. Bond, bond, bond. She’d grown up thinking she’d bonded to him just through letters, but maybe that was just what the council had told her. Perhaps they’d convinced her she belonged to the Novak Raven. That her fate was to be with him. Maybe her feelings weren’t real at all.

Bait.

Avery fell forward on her hands and knees and retched. Weston’s hand was gentle on her back, right between her shoulder blades, but she didn’t want the comfort. Didn’t deserve it. “Don’t touch me,” she said, wincing away from him.

“Avery,” he murmured softly.

She bolted upright to escape him. “No wonder you hated me. No wonder!” Her shoulders shook with her weeping, but who cared if she embarrassed herself now? He hadn’t ever been hers to begin with…and could never be because she was nothing. She was born to betray him.

Weston stood slowly, his hands out like he was settling a wild horse. “I didn’t ever hate you. I was hurt, and I lashed out the only way I knew how.”

“By ignoring me, and that’s fine. You had every right to pretend I was invisible because that’s what I am.” Her breath hitched. “I’m nothing.”

He was to her in an instant. His arms crushed her as she struggled to escape his embrace. She fought and fought, but he was so strong—so much stronger than her.

When her muscles were fatigued and twitching and she was too weary to fight anymore… When she was completely defeated, she sagged against him and let off a long, heartbroken sound and whispered again, “I’m nothing.”

“You aren’t. I swear you aren’t, Avery. I see you.”

She clutched onto his damp shirt and squeezed her eyes tightly because it felt so damn good to hear someone say that. And not just someone, but
the
someone.
Her
someone.

“I’m in a riptide, Weston. I’ve been pulled under for so long, and I’m being thrashed by the waves and dragged down by the current, but I’m still swimming, you know? I’m watching these bubbles racing to the surface, and if I can just follow them, maybe I’ll breathe again. Maybe I’ll be okay. But it’s been too long. I can’t breathe, and it’s been too long.”

The rasp of Weston’s jaw felt good against her face as he lowered his lips to her ear. “Fuck the council, and fuck everyone who has hurt you, Ave. Someday, you’re gonna rise up from the ashes like a fucking phoenix. Everything is going to be okay. I promise.”

Like a phoenix? Her? No way. She was weak, and the mud she’d been wallowing in was too heavy on her wings. She couldn’t rise up. Not her. “My whole life has been a lie. I’m all alone with nothing.” She let off a long, shuttering breath and admitted how screwed she was. “My car broke down.”

“I’ll fix it.” His voice sounded so determined. So sure.

And dammit, here was her shot to unload all her burdens on a strong man who could shoulder them. “I don’t have any money, and I haven’t been able to afford much food.”

“I’ll feed you.”

Her eyes prickled and burned because no one had ever been this kind to her. But there was an even bigger shame, and right now, she wanted to tell him everything. “I’ve been sleeping in my car.”

“I know.” Weston eased back and cupped her cheeks, his calloused hands rough against her skin. His eyes were dark under the brim of his hat. “I saw the pillow and the blanket in your back seat. I have a place for you to stay. Somewhere dry and warm where you can be alone and safe, and no one will bother you.”

“I don’t want your charity.”

“Then we won’t call it charity. Call it me making up for leaving you alone when you needed a friend.”

“Friend.” She
hated
the sound of that, but that’s all they could ever be. She’d been born to betray him after all.

Weston’s jaw clenched as he pressed his body gently against hers. His hands drifted from her cheeks to her neck, and a strange intensity sparked in his eyes. “I want to kiss you right now, but it doesn’t feel right.”

Avery froze. “Okay, I understand. Wait, no I don’t. Why doesn’t it feel right to kiss me?” Because she really wanted him to kiss her right now.

“Because you are dealing with a lot right now, finding out about the council and your car, and the—”

Avery pushed up on her tiptoes and kissed him. Way too hard. She basically bit him. Mortified, she lurched away, ducked her gaze, and apologized.

Weston rubbed his bottom lip like it hurt, but his mouth was stretching into a smile. He was laughing at her again, and she wanted to crawl into a hole and hide for the rest of her life.