Now or Never (16 page)

Chapter Twenty-seven

Jay

“Where the fuck is she?” Days without Em were like days without sunlight. They made Jay irritable and cranky, something Sahara hadn’t failed to point out more than once. “It’s been three damn days. I get that she’s pissed, but—”

“She’s taking a break.” Ashlyn set down the pile of menus she was carrying and collect
ed four plastic cups.

“A break?” Jay relieved her of two of them and followed her over to the soda fountain.

“Some mental health days.”

Mental health days
. Evidently, Jay made her crazy. Not unreasonable since he made himself that way half the time.

“But she’s okay? She’s not sick or anything?” As long as she hadn’t caught some version of the plague—because little else could keep Em from showing up for work, besides Ashlyn
, apparently—he could suck it up and deal with the fallout of his decisions.

“She’s tired, Jay.” Ash exchanged one of his empty cups for a full one and stopped to face him. “She’s been through a lot. You both have. I’m not saying this is any easier on you because, honestly, I don’t know all the details, but what I do know is this was
your
choice. You didn’t give her any say in the matter and she’s working through that. Em’s . . .”

“Pissed?” Jay supplied.

“No. She’s upset, Jay. I think you should talk to her.”

“I will.”
When this was all over. Whenever that may be.

“And Jay?” She turned to scoop some ice into the empty cup and fill it with Sprite before shoving it back in Jay’s hand. “You should take a
break, too. You could both use a little rest. No offense, but you kind of look like shit.”

No offense taken. Jay knew exactly how crappy he looked. Little food and even less sleep would do that to a guy. He felt worse than he had in months. At least he could still be grateful for running water.

“I’ll do that, too.”
Someday
.

Jay
trailed Ashlyn to her table where he helped to deliver the beverages before retrieving his dull gray bin and making for the vacated table in the corner. Reaching across it for an empty fry basket, he felt something brush against his ass, and glanced over his shoulder in time to watch Sahara saunter away.

She was
swaying so hard you’d think she was at sea. Jay had never struck a girl on purpose in his life, nor would he ever, but she was seriously starting to test the limits of his restraint. If the girl didn’t lay off, he was bound to let his foul mood get the best of him and say something they’d both regret.

On it
s return path, Jay’s gaze breezed past Mason standing behind the ticket counter. Someone else who wasn’t far behind on his ‘shit list’, t
hough the bruise still shadowing his jaw was a pretty damn good excuse for the glares he kept shooting in Jay’s direction. Somewhere along the way, Jay was forced to admit to himself that maybe he’d overreacted just a little. Didn’t mean he was sorry he hit him, though.

“You may want to stop looking at him like that.”

“Who?”

Ashlyn’s eyes rolled dramatically. “Mason. You’re antagonizing him.”

“I am not.”

“Sure.” She snatched up a ketchup bottle, shaking it in Jay’s face. “You may have beat his ass last time, but you sort of sucker punched him. Keep it up and you may be looking at a real fight.” Her gaze shifted from him, to Mason, and back again. “And I’m not sure who would win that, actually.”

If it came down to it, Jay would win. There wasn’t a doubt in his mind, but, “I’m not antagonizing him, and no one’s going to start a fight.”

“That’s what you say.” Ash headed for the counter with her bottle. “But you’re not the one that got sucker punched.”

Okay, he’d give her that much. He’d been on the receiving end of more than a few of those, and they could really piss a guy off. Covertly sneaking a peek in Mason’s direction, he wondered if she wasn’t too far off the mark. If he wanted a fight, let him bring it. He might even let the guy get a few free shots in as payback. But he’d still kick his ass.

***

By the end of the shift, he was slightly less confident in his combat skills. Fortunately, Mason didn’t seem all that interested in testing them. Jay was coming off of yet another twelve hour shift and
was barely staying upright as he crossed the threshold at home.

He kicked the door shut, but it ricocheted off a booted foot and bounced back open as his father strode in after him. “It’s payday, Julian
.”

Jay groaned. Did it really need to be today? Without sparing his father so much as a glance he stomped over to the kitchen drawer and pulled out an envelope stuffed with cash.
Handing it over to him was one of the hardest things he’d ever had to do. It felt like giving in. Like surrendering. His fingers clenched around the offering, but the memory of Em’s tears in his truck and the hurt on her face was enough to ease his grip.

His father snatched the
envelope and flipped through the stack of bills with a huff. “I’ve allowed you more than enough time to come up with the money. At this rate, you’ll be paying my corpse.”

One could only hope. “That’s everything there is.”

“That’s a shame, Julian.” Without another word, he left, pulling the door shut behind him on his way out and leaving Jay completely bewildered.

What the hell was that supposed to mean? He didn’t have the brain power left to fig
ure it out tonight. It was only ten o’clock, but he was dead on his feet and needed to be back at work again bright and early the following morning. Slamming the kitchen drawer shut, he lumbered down the hall, shedding clothes as he went and climbed into bed in nothing more than his boxers.

Chapter Twenty-eight

Em

The voices penetrating the hazy fog of sleep were indistinct but loud. Ashlyn was shouting and that was enough to drag Em fully into consciousness.
Scrambling out of bed, she threw open the bedroom door before coming to a dead stop in the hallway.

He was shrouded in shadows, but she knew immediately who stood on the doorstep arguing with Ash. The devil himself. And he was there for her. She couldn’t let her friend get caught in the middle of it. God only knew what he was capable of.

“Ash! Shut the—” She hadn’t even gotten the words out of her mouth before he shoved his way inside.

Ice cold eyes, dark as coal, latched onto her as he strode purposefully across the small house. Em backed away, but there was
n’t anywhere to go. He blocked the mouth of the hallway and continued to close the space between them.

“Em!” Ashlyn was too late. He was on her, dragging Em back inside her bedroom and slamming the door shut behind them.

The sound of the lock snapping into place echoed through Em’s panicked mind. Why was he there? What was he going to do? This couldn’t be happening.

“Em! Em!” The bedroom door reverberated under the pounding Ash was giving it, but refused to budge.

He stalked closer as Em scurried up the mattress until her back collided with the headboard and there was nowhere left to retreat.

“Em!
I’m calling the police!”

“No!” Em panicked.
The police were the last people Jay would want involved. They weren’t the bad guys, but with everything they’d been through, it was difficult to see them as the good guys, either. Difficult to trust them. To trust anyone. There was only one person Em trusted to keep her safe. Only one person who could—or would—ever be able to protect her. “Call Jay!”

She watched as a sick grin turned his father’s lips. “That’s right, call Jay.”

He undid his belt and slowly pulled it from the pant loops. Tears welled up as that old familiar terror pounded through Em’s body with every beat of her erratic pulse. “Don’t. Please. Please don’t do this.”

Em thought she
might break through the wall and straight out of the house with how hard her spine was pressing up against it, desperate to put more space between them. He took another step closer as the belt came free and she attempted to scramble off the bed, but her feet twisted in the sheets, trapping her.

She was trapped. In a bed. With a man she hated. The tears overflowed, streaming down her cheeks as her entire body trembled.
This couldn’t be happening. Not again. Not again. It would surely destroy her this time.

“Please.” She would have been ashamed of the pathetic whimper that escaped her if she hadn’t been so incredibly terrified.

He stood at the foot of the bed with the belt dangling from his hand. He made no move to get any closer, or to remove any more articles of clothing, and that was when she realized . . . he wasn’t the same brand of sick bastard as her uncle. Stark relief and a whole new kind of fear hit her at once. Jay’s father was in a whole different class of fucked up. Folding the belt in half, he slapped it across his palm. The sound filled the room and sent a tremor through Em.

“
Wh-what are you going to do to me?”

He tipped his head and continued to stare at her, reminding Em strangely of a bird. How dare he? How dare he try and look so innocent when she knew exactly what lay inside?

“You’re a monster!” Em had no clue where the power behind her voice was coming from, but she welcomed it. “Stay away from Jay. Stay away from me. Leave us alone! What do you want?”

“My money.” He said it as though it should be the most obvious thing in the world.

“We don’t have it. We don’t have anything.”

“Oh, Jay will get it. Or the next time I visit you, it will be as more than just a warning.” The belt lashed out before she even saw it coming and struck the bed beside her with a vicious blow. Em jumped as a small squeak escaped her lips and the bastard laughed. “Now you call Jay. You tell him what I said. He either gets me my money, or next time . . . it comes outta your hide.”

He threaded his belt casually back through his pants and strode from the room as though nothing had happened. As though he hadn’t just terrorized and threatened her. She didn’t know how she managed to do it, but the moment the bedroom door shut behind him, Em climb out of bed on shaky legs and locked it before collapsing to her knees in the corner.

Chapter
Twenty-nine

Jay

Jay rolled out of bed on a groan. It had been a long ass day and now some ass-hat was calling him in the middle of the night. If this was a wrong number, it wasn’t going to be a pleasant conversation.

“Hello?”

“Jay!” The moment he heard Ashlyn’s voice, he knew something was wrong.

“What happened?”

“There’s a-a
man here and h-he came in-into the h-house.”

“Calm down, Ash. Take a breath. Who’s there? Where’s Em? Are you okay?”

He could hear her take a quick breath. “I don’t know. A man came to the door and then just barged in. He w-went straight to Em’s room and locked the door! I c-can’t get in.”

“He’s in there with her now?”

Jay didn’t hear the answer to his question, he was already halfway down the hall, pulling on a pair of pants and racing for the door.

Son of a bitch. That son of a bitch was with Em. And he wasn’t.

Heart pounding so hard it threatened to break a rib, he raced out the door and threw himself behind the wheel. If that damn truck didn’t start, he swore to God he’d rip it to shreds with his own two hands. Heeding his warning, it turned over with very little sputtering and Jay tore out of the drive, plowing through a bank of snow that had been piled along the sidewalk.

His head spun with terrifying possibilities, drowning out the squeal of his tires against the slick pavement. Thoughts that threatened to call up the meager dinner he’d eaten
. Ahead of him, a streetlight flashed to red and Jay slammed on his brakes.
Goddammit
. Stomach muscles cramped painfully as his entire body heaved, but nothing seemed to be coming up. Except maybe his heart in a final attempt at escape before it could be utterly destroyed. If something happened to her . . . Because of him . . .

The combination of
dread and exhaustion blurred his vision. Without waiting for the light to turn green, Jay put the pedal to the metal and hauled ass toward Ashlyn’s.
It was a ten minute drive. Jay somehow managed to break just about every traffic law there was, along with a few laws of physics, and made it there in under four.

He was breathing so hard he sounded l
ike he’d just run the whole way when he burst through the front door to find Ashlyn in tears in the living room. “Where is he?”

“Gone. He left.”

Jay’s chest hollowed out. “Em?”

“She’s in her room.”
Thank God
. “She locked the door and I can’t get her to open it or come out. She won’t even talk to me. I don’t know what’s wrong.”

Jay stormed down the hallway to where Ashlyn pointed him toward the only closed door.
Gripping the frame with both hands, he took a deep breath to calm some of his nerves. The last thing he wanted to do was frighten her further.

“Em? It’s me, Em.” Keeping his voice even with so much fear and rage coursing through him was more than
a challenge. “Open the door.”

No response. No sound at all. He tried the handle and nothing. It was still locked from the inside.

“Em, if you don’t open this door, I’m going to assume you’re hurt in there and bust it down.”

He wouldn’t have heard the soft click of the lock being thrown if the rest of the house hadn’t been so deathly quiet. Jay was inside in less than a heartbeat. The door bounced off the wall with the force of his entry as he scanned the empty bed followed by the rest of the room until he spotted her curled in a little ball on the floor in the corner.

“Em?” He approached cautiously. He didn’t want to spook her, but he needed to be closer. To see her, touch her, hold her. “Baby? Are you okay? Did he . . . did he hurt you?”

Jay’s voice cracked on his greatest fear and Em finally looked up at him. Tear
tracks marred her face, but when she shook her head no, relief swamped him like a tidal wave.

“You’re okay?”

She nodded, but he couldn’t believe it was true until he saw it with his own eyes. Reaching for her hands, she let him pull her to her feet, where he surveyed every last inch of her. No cuts, no bruises, no welts, and she didn’t appear to be in physical pain.

Ashlyn breathed a sigh of relief behind him and Jay turned to find the girl pale and continuing to cry
, silently.

“I will be
right back
.” With a quick squeeze of Em’s hand and one more glance to assure himself she was real, he steered Ashlyn back out into the hallway.

“I’m so sorry, Ash. This never should have happened. He never should have come to your house and . . . Are you okay?”

She swallowed hard and nodded. “Who was that?”

“My father,” Jay ground out.

“That man was your—”

“It’s a long story.”

Ashlyn nodded. “I’m not asking.”

Jay gaped at her, bewildered. This girl had taken Em in, handled her shit and his, and she wasn’t even asking for an explanation? The bastard had been in her house, for chrissakes. The only kind of people who were that understanding were people with secrets of their own. Whatever Ashlyn’s were, they were buried deep.

“I will tell you. Sometime. I mean it, but—”

“Now isn’t the time.
I’m okay, Jay. He didn’t come anywhere near me. I’m just afraid for Em.”

“
You’re a good friend. She’s lucky to have you. We both are. Thank you for calling me.” Jay folded his hand over her shoulder and felt the way she still trembled.

“I wanted to call the police. Em told me not to.”

“Let me handle this, Ash. I’ll take care of her. I’ll take care of all of this. You don’t have to worry. You’ll never see him again. I promise you.”

Ash sniffled back her tears and nodded again. “I’m exhausted. I’m gonna go to bed. If she needs anything . . .”

“I’ll let you know.”

“Take care of her, Jay. She needs you more than you know.” With that, Ashlyn slipped across the hall into her own room and shut the door.

How anyone could possibly need him after the crap he’d put them through tonight, Jay couldn’t understand.

Em w
as sitting on the bed when he returned to her room. She’d wiped the tears from her face, but kept her arms wrapped protectively around her middle. Jay shut the door and leaned back against it, studying her.

“He really didn’t hurt you?”

“No. He just . . . scared me.”

Jay sighed, taking a few steps closer. The need to have her in his arms was intense and overwhelming, but it had always been that way with her. When she didn’t retreat, he closed the distance between them and sat beside her on the mattress.

Dropping his elbows to his knees, he planted his face in his hands as relief cracked through the shell of terror that had been holding him together up until that point. Em was so strong. Ashlyn was so strong. He didn’t want her seeing how
weak
he really was.

“I thought . . .” He couldn’t hide the weakness in his voice, though. “When Ashlyn called and said he was here . . . I think I died a thousand times on my way over.”

A small hand glided up his back, unintentionally reminding him of all the horrific things that monster could have done to her. A sob caught in the back of his throat, but his body shuddered with the force of holding it in.

Em’s hand cupped his shoulder and her face nuzzled against the other. “I’m okay.” Her warm breath coated his raw nerve endings
, reminding him she was alive. And right there. Close enough to touch. Close enough to . . .

Lifting his face, he looked right into hers. “I need to hold you. I know it’s confusing and not fair of me to ask, but . . . can I stay? Just for tonight? Can I hold you? Just tonight. Please?”

Em agreed without hesitation, throwing back the blankets for both of them to crawl underneath. Jay laid on his back with Em tucked close to his side. Her head rested on his chest and his arms wrapped tightly around her. He felt like he could finally breathe again. He never wanted to let go of that feeling.

“I love you
, so much.”

“I love you, too
.” Her voice was small and tired.

“Close your eyes. I’m not going anywhere. Get some rest, baby.”

He felt her breathing even out in a matter of minutes and marveled at the fact that his presence could calm her enough to sleep after what she’d just been through. He’d failed to protect her, yet again, tonight and still, she trusted him with her safety. How could anyone have that kind of faith in him?

Jay held
his heart in his arms all night, never once letting her go, and cursed fate for every awful thing she’d had to endure. When would it be enough? He’d done everything he could think of, given up everything he had—including the one thing he loved more than anything else in the godforsaken world:
her
—and still it wasn’t enough. What the hell else did this life want from him? He had nothing left to give.