Old Enough to Love... (Just One of the Guys) (5 page)

“Hey, Emma,” she greeted. “How’s Ryan?” 

She was so pretty. “Fine, I guess. Haven’t you talked to him?” I hated when girls asked me about my brother. He was a player and everyone knew it. And here stood Estelle, with her ebony hair and perfect body—asking me about him. Wait, maybe this was a good thing. Maybe she’d stay away from Zach.

“He hasn’t really talked to me since prom,” she complained.

“Hmm, well, we were gone most of the summer.” I moved to the door hoping for an easy escape.

“Tell him hi for me.” She beat me out the door. “Hi Zach,” she chimed.

I heard her greeting before my eyes found him. Suddenly my throat went dry—again.

“Are you going my way?” Estelle asked with a mild southern drawl—she was from Seattle.

I tried not to roll my eyes. Mainly, because they were too busy searching for him.

“Hey ‘
Stelle. I’m not sure. Hey, Emma. Where you headed?” His eyes met mine.

This time it was my eyes that danced from him to her and back to him. As hard as I fought—a smile touched the corners of my mouth. My arms felt weak and I tightened my grip on my Algebra book.  Estelle’s eyes narrowed back at me, apparen
tly not feeling the camaraderie we had just shared.

She stepped closer to Zach touching his bicep with her hand. “Emma is Ryan’s sister
and
a freshman.”

My mind was racing. Estelle said ‘Ryan’s sister’ like it was a crime and the word ‘freshman’ hissed off her tongue. I, of course, said nothing. But she was right; Ryan had run off every guy I’d ever liked. Not that there were many, but even his friends knew I was off limits. 

“Hey, Runt.” Connor whacked me with a book from behind.

“Hey, Con.” I couldn’t pull my eyes away to look at Connor and was getting more annoyed each time I was referred to as Runt.

I watched Zach, eager for his response. My eyes were wide and Estelle’s smoky lashes fluttered.

“We were all freshman once.” He smiled and strolled in my direction.

Estelle flipped around stomping away.

No words came from my mouth as much as I wanted them to.

His eyes bore into mine. “So. Where you headed?” he asked. He was walking me to class?

“Um…I…gym…P.E.  I have P.E.” I had three words to get out and couldn’t do that clearly. My thumb acting on its own accord pointed toward the gym.

“Well, we don’t have much time. You’re gonna be late.” He whirled me in the opposite direction. It must have been obvious I was unable to do it on my own. His hand rested at the small of my back, as he directed me through the hallway toward the gym. A jolt of electricity shot through my body as his hand shifted up and down. We moved fast and didn’t talk. As we neared the gym, he glanced at his watch.

“About 20 seconds to spare.”

“Now,
you’re
gonna be late.” I smiled guiltily but I didn’t really feel bad.

“I have Spanish. Ms. Padilla won’t care. Do you want me to put your Algebra book in my locker?” he offered. 

“That’s OK. Thanks though. I should go.” God, I did not want to leave. His beautiful brown eyes seemed amused. Had I said something?

“
OK. I’ll see you after.” He smiled then jogged down the hall.

I wished I’d let him take my book. Then I would have had to get it after school because of the homework assignment.  What did he mean ‘I’ll see you after’—after what? After class? After school? 

Gym passed more slowly than Algebra and when the bell rang, I left by the same door I came in so there would be no confusion. Zach was waiting, his big brown eyes staring at me. I fought a smile and didn’t win. I couldn’t believe this was happening.

“Hungry?” he asked.

“Kind of.”

“You staying on campus?”

I shrugged. I hadn’t given it much thought and had never had a choice. Ali and Lauren would be looking for me.              

“Do you want to walk across the street?” he asked.

“Sure.”

We swung by his locker, and I threw my stuff in after all, then headed down the stairs and out the front. The sky was overcast and smelled of smoke from the California fires.

“How was your summer?” he asked.

“It was OK.
Kinda boring.” We walked close. I wondered if he could hear my heart.  “Yours?”

“Stuck here most of it. Went back to the City for a week.  Anyway. I wanted to talk to you.”

“Kay.”  I felt sick.

He shook his head. “This summer. Before you left. That night.”

My head was going to explode with embarrassment. “It’s OK. It doesn’t matter. It’s fine.”

His head snapped sideways, his eyes confused. “What do you mean?”

He didn’t want me. A nervous laugh answered his question. “It’s cool. No worries.”

“But your dad, he was pretty upset.”

I looked at him, confused by his words. Now
, I
didn’t understand.

“Your dad was upset,” he attempted to explain.

I blushed. “I’m sorry about that.” God, was I sorry. So this was a guilt thing. Apologize to the little girl who got in trouble.

“No, don’t be. It wasn’t your fault. He had a right to be upset. I should never have fallen asleep.”

“Oh, absolutely. Sleep is off limits in our house.” I laughed nervously again.
Sleep is off limits in our house???

He lowered his brow and though he smiled, his eyes were serious. I found my cheek with my teeth.

“It was a nice night,” I said and couldn’t believe those words just came out either. I stared at the grass.

He stopped before we went in the cafe and brushed my cheek with his thumb but said nothing.

The place was loud and we stood in line to order.

“Hey, Runt.”

I tensed and whirled around to see Grant.

“Grant, stop calling me that,” I said forcefully.

Zach leaned in and grasped my hand. My heart fluttered and I glanced up at him. Grant frowned as he noticed our hands and with his elbow, he nudged the guy behind him. Ryan turned slowly around, eyeing us. Self conscious, I loosened my hold on Zach’s hand. Ryan scooted out of the booth.
Oh, God
.

“You are an idiot.” Ryan scowled at me.

Tears swelled in my eyes.
Don’t cry. Don’t cry.

“Hey!” Zach cautioned Ryan and reached for my hand again.

Shocked, my eyes searched Zach’s angry face. No one stood up to Ryan. I watched Ryan’s lips purse and his eyes roll at Grant; then Ryan spun me in the opposite direction before Zach got my hand and shoved me out the door.

“Freshman-can’t-leave-
campus.You-have-a-closed-lunch, dumbass.” His words were slow and well articulated.

I fought off the urge to cry. “I didn’t know.”

Zach stepped up. “It’s my fault. I’m the one who asked her. And she’s not a dumbass.” Zach shot Ryan a look daring him to a challenge. This time, Zach’s hand slid perfectly into mine.  “Let’s get you back,” he said.

“You’re
gonna have a detention and I already told you…he’s too freaking old for you,” Ryan shouted behind us. “You better leave her alone, Owens.”

I was mortified. I was ecstatic. The first guy who’d ever stood up to my brother and at this moment I didn’t even have the courage to look at him. I stole my hand from his and folded my arms across my chest, barely catching a glimpse of him; and his mouth turned down at the corners. Was he upset or scared or disgusted?  Maybe Ryan frightened him. But he didn’t look frightened.

“I’m sorry, I ruined your lunch.” Those were the only words I could offer. I was sure things couldn’t get worse.

“I’m the one who should be sorry. I didn’t know the rule.” He quickened his pace as we entered the school and I struggled to keep up, but wondered if he was trying to get away from me. “God, things are so different here. I’ll try to get you out of the detention. Maybe they’ll give it to me.” He smiled apologetically.

“It’s OK.” My voice was weak. I was weak.

“What’s the deal with you and
Meiers?”

Meiers
? “Grant?”

“Emma! Over here,” Ali shouted. 

Zach automatically steered us in that direction. They were closing down the lunch line and I could read the thought on his face. I smiled. “It’s OK. I’m not that hungry.” I was starving.

“Miss Hendricks. This week you get a free pass for being late. Are you aware of the closed lunch for freshman?” Mr. Ming, our principal, asked confronting me.

I nodded. “I am now.” I looked around and Zach was gone. Good thing he didn’t have to witness my admonishment.

“Hey. Where have you been?” Lauren asked.

I told them what had happened and they were awestruck with the Zach thing. Who was I kidding…
I
was awestruck.

“He’s a senior,” Ali said as if I wasn’t aware of that fact.

“Zach Owens likes you?” Lauren questioned like it was an inconceivable thought.

“Thank you,” I said sarcastically. I hadn’t told my two best friends about the out of this world kiss we shared two months ago. I knew they’d enjoy it almost as much as I had so I told the story.

“So anyway. It was perfect. He smelled so good…and God…the way he wrapped his arms around me…it’s like I fit perfectly. His hands were so big and his kiss—oh—my—God.” I closed my eyes as the words came out and remembered just like I had all summer. “I so want to kiss him again.” There was a thud on the table; I opened my eyes. A package of individually wrapped peanut butter and crackers lay on the table in front of me. Across the table, Ali and Lauren’s eyes focused above my head. Ali’s mouth hung open and Lauren looked away. My heart dropped into my stomach and I felt sick. I tilted my head back till it bumped his chest and he tilted his head down until we stared at each other. He held my head in his palms, grinned then leaned in to my ear and whispered. “Eat.”

I buried my head in my hands. This was the best and worst day ever. The best because of Zach. The worst because I was a freshman, a runt, and a dumbass.

The first flights of stairs were easy at the speed I took them. When I finally reached the top, an ache ripped through my calves and I zipped into the bathroom. Empty. Thank God, though the rank urine stench was company enough.

I paced trying to breathe with my fingers laced behind my head, but the tension held its ground, stubbornly fighting me. I searched for something worthy of my fist but adding destruction of property to my juvenile record wouldn’t help. Settling, my foot made contact with a four inch metal pipe. The jolt brought me out of the emotional pit I’d fallen into, if only for a minute.

I caught sight of myself in the mirror. Leaving California was supposed to be a new start. I disgusted myself. Why was I so angry? Was it because I’d left everything I loved in the city? Was it about her douche bag brother who thought he could call the shots? Or maybe the rage of her father that night? The first girl who had really caught my attention and everyone around her hated me.

I replayed the events of the night her parents walked in, like I had all summer. Just what I needed, a family already questioning my intentions when I did nothing but kiss the fifteen year old girl. Her father was completely unwavering in his stance. It wasn’t fair and clearly obvious which parent Ryan took after.

The pain in my foot was diminishing and replaced with a pain in my chest. The inviting thought of her tongue tracing over my lip flooded back. I shook the thought from my mind. ‘I’m fifteen’ I heard over and over again in my head like a mantra.  Not that fifteen was bad. I’d banged a fifteen year old before. But she was different. There was something about her that got me.  Something about her that needed me.  I adjusted my crotch and chuckled thinking about what she needed.  Her kiss held innocence. I could only imagine the extent of her innocence.

I remembered sitting in my Jeep that night staring up at the house, not wanting to leave her there alone to fight our battle. 
OUR
battle
?  The curtains in the front window pulled apart in the middle then closed. I wondered if it was her then figured it was probably her father.