On Steady Ground (The Walker Brother's Series) (5 page)

“Grant, I can’t.”

“You can. I won’t hurt you Lizzy, I promise.”

Those words I’ve heard before. They were exactly that. Words. Empty promises. “Sometimes things aren’t about you Grant.”

“Well then tell me, who are they about?”

“Well I don’t know, lets try a psycho husband that verbally abused me for a couple years now, ending with a nasty left hook to my face. Now, he has the divorce papers and he knows where I’m at. I suspect I should be seeing him before long.” I screamed, snapping. Walking towards me the tears were fighting to come out, biting them back with everything I had.

“Lizzy, let me help you.”

“I don’t need help.” Stepping back from him.

“Why won’t you let me help you? I don’t understand, you have known me longer. We used to date, but you let Ian in before you let me. Why?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Please leave Grant. I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I’m sorry, I just can’t right now.”

Walking towards the door, I hated hurting him. “I’m sorry Grant. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

Smiling back at me, “We’ll see.”

Walking out of the door, my guilt shaming me again for treating him so badly when he liked me so much. The phone ringing, I knew who it was. Picking it up and slamming it back down. I paced the kitchen, tears breaking through the barriers, rolling down my cheeks. So much tension and anxiety built up in my body I felt like I could run for miles, until I dropped from exhaustion. The phone ringing again I did the same thing, this time leaving it off the hook. Picking up my purse from the counter I chucked it across the room hitting the wall with a thud, falling to the floor the same time I fell to my knee’s.

Hearing the screen door open I started to get on my feet ready to run if I had to, scared it was Craig. Ian walking in I fell back to my knees covering my face so he wouldn’t see. “Go away Ian.”

“No. You need to tell me what is going on.”

“Why are you here?”

“Grant told me you needed me.”

Well that accomplished it’s goal in making me feel even worse. “I don’t need anyone.”

“What happened? Why is the phone off the hook?”

“He found me Ian. He found me.” Walking over to me, pulling me up to my feet. Come, you’re staying with me.”

“Oh no I’m not. Remember how well it worked out last time?”

“Actually, we got a long fine. It was whatever is going on with you and my brother that didn’t go over so well.”

“There is nothing going on with me and your brother!” I shouted a little louder than I meant to. Wrapping his arms around me, forcing me against his chest I finished my complete break down. Holding me until the tears dried up, he pulled away staring down at me.

“Get your stuff Lizzy. If this guy invokes such a reaction from you, then I don’t trust you being here by yourself. I’m not asking.”

Sighing, “Fine.” Walking to my room filling up a bag I could hear Ian in the other room.

“Pack for a couple nights Lizzy.”

Rolling my eyes, I appreciated what he was doing. He was just trying to protect me and I am acting like a crazed lunatic. Sighing, my body suddenly felt so fatigued. I was done fighting for the day. I was officially exhausted.

Walking out of the bedroom and throwing my bag over my shoulder, “How do you think he got the private number?”

Ian looked at me, “I don’t know, but it’s only a matter of time before he figures out the address. My best guess is Ben has given it out a lot.”

“I can lock the doors Ian. I’m sure I’ll be alright tonight.”

Shaking his head, “Famous last words. Come on Lizzy, we’ll both sleep better tonight knowing you’re safe.”

Sighing, I followed him out of the door. I just wanted this nightmare to end. Ian helping me into the kitchen he grabbed my bag and brought it back upstairs. Sitting on a stool in the kitchen I stared at the television, that restless feeling starting to stir in my body again. The sun was starting to set low and my thoughts kept swinging back and fourth from Craig to Ian, once in a while splashing a little guilt in about Grant. Ian walking back into the room, my head was now resting in my hands.

Grabbing me by the hand, “Come on. I want to show you something.”

Looking up at him, “What?”

“Just come on. Trust me.”

He had no idea what he was asking, trust was such a rare commodity in my heart anymore. If it was anyone else I probably would of told him to take the trust me and shove it. It’s not, however. This is Ian. Standing, I let him take me by the hand leading me back outside, the sun now setting low. Leading me to the truck, “Where are we going Ian?”

“You’ll see.”

Helping me up into the truck, he smiled at me before walking around and sliding into the drivers seat.

“I’m not sure it’s a good idea leaving….” Cutting me off mid sentence.

“We’re not going far and you need to get away. I won’t let anything happen to you.”

Sighing, “Fine.”

Reaching over and squeezing my hand, “Relax.”

Taking a deep breath, “Okay, this is me relaxing.”

Laughing, he pulled off into a field where you could barely see tire tracks. Holding on through the bumpy ride, he stopped right when we hit the edge of the woods.

Looking at me smiling, “We’re here. Hurry, we only have so much light left.”

Sliding across the seat, he picked me up and set me down on the ground, grabbing my hand again. Leading me into the woods we didn’t have to walk far until we hit a clearing with a huge pond sitting in the middle. Standing in awe, there were ducks floating all around in the water. Baby ducks following the mama across the pond and I could feel the tension melt out of my body. I was so appreciative in that moment I could have kissed him. “It’s so beautiful Ian. Is this place yours?”

Dropping my hand and walking to the edge, “Yeah, it’s my favorite place to go to. Don’t worry only my family knows it’s here. You’re safe here Lizzy.”

Smiling and walking up next to him, I put my hand in his again. Looking back at me confused, this time he didn’t let go. We stood and stared out into the pond in silence a couple of minutes before he took his shirt off placing it on the ground.

“Sit.” He motioned to the ground.

“No. No. I don’t want to get your shirt dirty.” Trying not to be to obvious admiring his physique.

Sitting down, he pulled me down next to him his arms resting on his knees. Looking at me smiling now, “You feel better?”

Shaking my head, “Yeah I feel better.”

“Good.”

“Can we stay here forever?”

Chuckling, and looking out at the pond.

Grabbing his hand in mine, “Thank you Ian.”

Dropping my hand quickly, he continued to stare at the pond.

My ego taking a hit, I tucked my hand in my other and wasn’t about to make the same mistake. It was obvious he wasn’t interested. We sat in silence until it was getting so dark you could barely see a few feet in front of you.

“We should get going.” He stood brushing himself off. Reaching down to help me up, I chose to not take his hand and stood myself. He looked at me skeptically and dropped his hand, taking his shirt from the ground.

Walking back and crawling into the big truck, I refused his help this time. I wasn’t going to put myself out there for no amount of time only to get smacked back. I was way to proud for that, and all men pretty much suck right now anyhow. I say that, but I still find myself glancing over in his direction.

Following Ian back into the house, my mood was all over the place.

“Come on, lets talk.” Ian said walking off towards the living room.

I didn’t want to talk. I wanted to sit and stew and worry in privacy. Choosing the recliner far away from the couch where he sat, I sat perched on the edge.

“Do you love him Lizzy?”

Well wasn’t that going straight to the point, one problem I don’t know what point he’s getting at. “Love who?”

“Your husband.” Leaning back on the couch his dirty shirt slung over his leg.

“My soon to be ex-husband and no. I haven’t loved him in quite some time.”

Looking like he was contemplating about something, “Why so guarded then?”

Countering, “Why are you so guarded?”

Smirking, “I asked you first.”

Sighing, “Easy, I don’t want to get hurt again. I trusted Craig at one point and look how well that turned out. He ended up being a monster. Your turn.”

“Same answer I’ve always had, haven’t found anyone that has peaked my interest enough to settle down.”

“So, this perfect mystery woman? What does she need to possess to earn your attention?” Leaning back, crossing my legs now intrigued with the line of questions.

Raising one eyebrow at me, “I’ll know when I meet her.”

Raising my eyebrow back at him, “How do you know you haven’t met her already?”

“I think that’s a good possibility.” He said evasively making me want to either smack him or kiss him.

A knock on the door, pulling us out of our conversation. Starting to stand, nervous.

Ian getting up and walking by me concerned, “Stay here.”

Shaking my head I moved to the corner out of sight. My hands moving to over my mouth, I could hear Craig’s voice.

“Do you know an Elizabeth Miller?” Craig asked.

Ian shutting him down immediately, “Never heard of her.”

“Who lives over in the other house?” Craig asked.

“I own it.”

“That’s not the question I asked.” Craig said. I could tell his temper was starting to flare.

“And yet that’s the answer I’m giving. Have a good day sir.” Ian said closing the door, watching Craig drive down the lane, making sure he left.

Walking back into the living room, my hand was still clamped over my mouth. He found me, he actually found me. Still in disbelief that he did so quickly. Ian walking up to me and pulling me into his arms.

“It’s alright. I told you I would take care of you.” Smoothing my hair back out of my face. “I think maybe we should go talk to the police.” Pulling me back to look at me.

“And tell them what? That my husband is trying to find me? I’d get laughed at.”

“He abused you Lizzy.” Ian said looking concerned.

“It’s my word against his. That was the first time he physically abused me and nothing is on record. Lets just face it, I’m screwed.”

Giving me a grim face, “Point taken.”

“Do you think he’ll come back?”

“No. Not tonight.”

“What am I going to do Ian?”

“Avoid him, but still try to live your life. Don’t let him hold you hostage anymore. You’re exhausted, you should get some rest.”

“I think I might.” My worry still at the surface.

“I’ll be up for a while. I’ll make sure he doesn’t come back Lizzy.”

Nodding my head, “Thanks Ian.” I didn’t want to walk away from him. I wanted to ask him if I could stay close to him for the rest of the night. That wasn’t fair to him. He was already putting himself completely out for my benefit. With a heavy heart I trudged myself up the stairs, my muscles weary from the events of the day. My mind exhausted to the point where I could hardly think clearly.

The rest of night was fitful at best. I never did hear Ian come up to his bedroom. I figured he either fell asleep downstairs or stood guard all night long. Either way, I felt guilty for the trouble I was causing him. The sun light was now dancing through the curtains, willing me to get up and move my tired bones. I already made up my mind at some point in the night. I am going back to Ben’s house. My confrontation with Craig is inevitable at this point. If I don’t see him today, he is going to stalk my work tomorrow. Either way, it was going to happen. Rolling out of bed, I slowly changed into a pair of jeans and a tank top. Grabbing my bags, I was hoping to sneak out without Ian being none the wiser. As I made my way downstairs and past the couch he was sleeping on, I soon found out nothing gets by this man.

“Going somewhere?”

Sighing and dropping my bags to my feet, “I was just going back to Ben’s. I have taken up enough of your time already Ian.”

“Did you hear me once complain?” Opening his eyes and sitting up on the couch, giving me one of those sexy smirks that makes my thoughts scatter. Swinging my gaze down to his bare chest my mouth went dry and I fought to find the words.

“You were right. I have to live my life, I can’t let him control every aspect. I’m not with him anymore and he can’t control me. I have to stop being under his thumb, it’s suffocating. Hell I’m not even with the man anymore and he’s still pulling my strings.” I stomped my foot, my anger rising.

Standing and looking at me, “Understood. If this is what you feel like you need to do, then I can’t stop you. If you need anything or change your mind, you know where I’m at. It really is no problem.”

“Thank you Ian.” Resisting the urge to walk the two steps to him and hug him. Picking up my bags, I made my way out of his house and into the other. I didn’t know what to think about my new found freedom. I was so used to slowly being controlled that I no longer knew how to act. I always disliked Sundays, it was the day where Craig always stayed home and I couldn’t get away from him. Now I had to change that. Throwing my bags in my room, I unpacked them quickly, a piece of paper falling out with Grants name on it. Sighing and staring at it, I told him I would call him today. I may be a lot of things but I try my hardest not be a liar. Being lied to most of my marriage tends to leave a bad taste in your mouth.

Looking over at wall clock it read eight. I owed him a massive apology for the way I acted yesterday. Throwing the piece of paper down on the bed I went and got a phone book, writing down a number for a taxi and then his address. It would do me some good to get away for a while anyhow, if he isn’t home I could occupy myself going window shopping. Throwing on a more suitable attire, I decided on a form fitting red casual dress and matching heels.

Placing the phone back on the hook, I looked at it almost expecting it to ring immediately. My heart beating back into rhythm when it didn’t. Picking it back up, I dialed the number to the taxi and sat down at the kitchen table to wait the twenty minutes. I gave thought to telling Ian that I was leaving so he wouldn’t worry. Then my stubborn side took hold and told me I no longer answered to any men, no matter how good their intentions were. Just when I thought the quiet house was going to get the best of me, the cab started down the gravel lane. Grabbing my purse I made my way out onto the porch and into the cab, careful not to look at Ian’s house. Giving the the nice old guy directions, we were on our way into the bigger city. Luckily it wasn’t that far, just an interstate ride a way so it wouldn’t break me to much.

Pulling up to the massive apartment building, I was already intimidated by how expensive everything looked. I knew he did well for himself, but I guess I didn’t realize just how well. Walking into the lobby, mail boxes were arranged off onto the side wall. Zeroing in on Grants name he was at the very top. Figures, he would have the best. Sighing, and stepping onto the claustrophobic elevator, there was only one thing I hated worse than elevators and that was heights. The tenth floor felt like it took an eternity to reach, luckily making it with no stops. Stepping out, there was only one door in the small hallway and it made the guessing game a whole lot easier.

Stepping nervously up to the door, I was anxious on how I would be received. Pecking lightly, I wasn’t even sure if he could hear my knocks. Then again, I wasn’t sure if I wanted him to. Just as I was ready to turn heels and run a shapely, tall brunette answered the door. Her cleavage hanging out of her shirt, it barely left anything to the imagination. Her skirt even less than convincing for being called clothing at all. My mouth dried up and I think I lost all motion of my limbs. “I’m sorry, wrong apartment.” My eyes catching movement in the background, Grant stepped out into view. Shirtless, with a towel wrapped around his mid-section I wanted to march in and slap him. The nerve for forcefully hitting on me, making me feel guilty about Ian and he is laying down with another woman. “How could I be so stupid?” I said glaring at him, as I started back to the elevator. To think that I thought this man was actually interested in me. Making me believe that he wasn’t the same Grant he was in high school.

“Lizzy. Stop. Wait.” He yelled rushing forward. Hitting the elevator button several times, it was just my luck that it was already down on the first floor. “Lizzy.” He said pulling me around to look at him.

“I’m sorry to have disturbed you Grant. I must go now.” I said, the tall brunette looking at me with a quizzical look on her face, turning unhappy fast.

“No wait. You just got here.” Trying to hold on to my hand as the elevator worked it’s way up to his floor.

“I can see you got your hands full. I shouldn’t have come.” Turning and looking up at the slow moving numbers.

“Lizzy wait. Come in and talk to me.”

“No. I have to go.”

“Then why did you come?” He said swinging me around to look at him again.

“I..I..don’t know.” The elevator doors opening up, the brunette walking by, giving me a dirty look.

“Grant, as always it’s nice to see you. I’ll be back later tonight, when it’s less crowded.” She said pinning me with an icy stare.

The elevators closing right in front of me, I wasn’t about to get inside with her. Waiting until the doors closed and the numbers started moving again, I hit the button again.

“Lizzy please. Come in and talk to me.”

“I don’t think there is anything to talk about Grant.”

“Please Lizzy. Please. Just give me five minutes. You came all this way.” He pleaded.

“Five minutes.” Turning and walking into his fancy apartment. It looked barely lived in, and not near as warm and welcoming as Ian’s house. Stepping into the kitchen, leaning up against the counter and staring at him.

“Let me go get some clothes on.” He said starting to turn.

“It’s your five minutes, how do I care what you do with them.” I could see him cuss under his breath and turn to me again. He was even more attractive half-naked, I’ll give him that at least. It was hard not to look, and he and Ian held a lot of the same attributes.

“I’m sorry you had to see that Lizzy. If I had known you were coming…”

Cutting him off, “Then what? You would have hidden how you really are Grant? You haven’t changed a bit.”

Shaking his head and walking forward, “Why does it matter to you Lizzy? I thought you didn’t give a shit about me. If I had known other wise, you damn well bet she wouldn’t have been here.”

“It doesn’t matter.” Turning my head away, crossing my arms in front of my chest.

“Then why are you so upset?”

“Because you made me believe that you wanted something more. You made me feel guilty as hell about staying with Ian. Just those two facts alone irritate me that I was losing sleep over it, when you obviously had no problem sleeping.” I said my hand flying towards the door.

“I’m so sorry Lizzy, I had no idea. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“You didn’t, it’s just that….I don’t know.”

“Is that the only thing bothering you? Based on your reaction I find it really hard to believe.” Grabbing my hand, my eyes looking into his.

“I’m a mess right now Grant.”

“Why don’t you just give me a chance Lizzy? I can tell you like me.” Smirking, his hand dropping down to my hip.

Could he tell that? At this point I wasn’t even sure. “I have to much going on in my life right now Grant. I just don’t have it in me. You are to high risk for someone like me, especially after what I’ve been through. You’re just not good for me.”

His other hand going back up to my cheek, “I can be good for your Lizzy, if you give me a chance.”

Choking on the words, “I can’t.”

“You can. What else is standing in your way? It can’t be only Craig.”

Looking off to the side, Ian’s face flashed into my head. Am I that transparent? “That isn’t enough?”

Looking at me skeptically, “It’s my little brother. I’m not used to competing with my brother, but I’m always up for a challenge.”

“I never said it was your brother.” Wishing that I wasn’t plastered against the counter, that I could get away from his penetrating eyes. “This was a mistake, I shouldn’t have come.” Trying to pull out of his grasp, he kept me in place.

“You are always running from me Lizzy. I do enjoy the chase, however I grow tired.”

“Then don’t chase me.” I challenged back at him.

“You’re to good not to.”

“Grant you barely know me anymore. It’s been years since we spent any time together. You wouldn’t know if you still did like me. I’m not the same person I used to be.”

“Then let me get to know you again. Sit down, let me get dressed and I’ll make some coffee. We’ll just talk. Come on, what do you have to lose?”

He was good. I didn’t really know what I had to lose. I know I didn’t want to go back home yet, knowing Craig could never find me here. “Okay fine.”

“Great.” Smiling and clapping his hands together, he disappeared down a long hall.

Looking around, his apartment was immaculate. It was hard to believe anyone actually lived here. It seemed like everything had a spot and was rarely moved. I sat down gently on the couch, afraid to touch much of anything. It wasn’t long before he reappeared in a loose pair of brown khaki’s and a white t-shirt. Starting a pot of coffee he walked into the living room, sitting down next to me. I scolded myself immediately for not choosing the chair instead.

“So, have things gotten any better?” He asked sitting closely to me.

Crossing my legs and leaning back, the couch really was comfortable. “Not so much. He showed up last night.”

Sitting up concerned, “What? Are you okay?”

“Yeah, Ian took care of it.”

Nodding his head, looking displeased. “That’s my brother. I’m glad he was there for you.”

“Yeah me to. He saved the day.” I said smiling nervously at him as he leaned back again.

“My brother tends to do that.”

“I thought you and your brother were always close.” Surprised at the hostility in his voice.

“Looks can be deceiving.”

“My interest is peaked. Do tell.” Walking back into the kitchen to retrieve our coffee, I wasn’t sure if he was going to answer me or not.

Placing the coffee into my hands, “My brother and I through the early years always competed in everything. He was always better at everything, even receiving my fathers love.”

Shaking my head, “I doubt that Grant. Your father was always so nice, I can’t see him picking favorites.”

“Point is, there has always been a bit of hostility and hard feelings between us.”

“He’s your brother Grant. You only have one, cherish it. I wasn’t so lucky to get siblings.”

Running his fingers through my hair, “Your so caring Lizzy, you have such a big heart. I wish you didn’t have feelings for my brother.”

“I never said I did.” Looking at him in defiance.

“You don’t have to.” Coming in closer, he turned his body towards mine, his leg touching mine.

“So is that what this is to you? A competition with your brother? Because as far as I can tell your brother isn’t competing.”

Laughing, “That may be the case, but I can tell he is just as enamored with you as he always has been.”

“Always? What are you talking about Grant?” Now visibly annoyed with his evasiveness.

“Oh come on Lizzy. You can’t tell me you never noticed how much he was always staring at you in high school. I noticed it more of course when we were dating.”

Shaking my head, “You’re crazy. He never stared at me, he had just as many girls chasing him as you did. He wouldn’t have had time to stare at me.”

“You know my brother. He is picky, but you captured his interest and it seems you have held it just as you have caused me to hold mine all these years.”

Looking into his mug of coffee, I bent down to sniff it.

“What are you doing Lizzy?” He asked laughing in confusion.

“Just wondering how much liquor you put in your cup.”

“I haven’t been drinking.” Now even more amused with me.

Gazing at each other, the silence became uncomfortable and I would have given anything at that moment for a diversion.

“Kiss me Lizzy. Not because I made the first move, but because you want to.”

How absurd has this man become? Always so forward. “I’m not kissing you Grant. You just had another woman leave. I refuse to be second. I played second fiddle far to long in my marriage.” Looking down onto the floor, he looked injured. I didn’t mean to insult him. “I’m sorry Grant, that was harsh. I had no right to be so judgmental. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

“Don’t worry about it. I know how bad it looks, it doesn’t give you a very good glimpse of the man I am now.”

Smiling at him, “I’m still sorry.”

“So what do you have planned for the day?” Switching topics before he caused even more damage.

“Nothing much. I was just going to go window shopping and then head home.”

“Wait a second, how did you get here?”

“Cab.” I knew what was coming next.

“I’ll give you a ride home, but first lets go do that window shopping you talked about.”

“On no. Really that’s okay. I don’t want to put you out and I think your girlfriend is planning on coming back.”

“I insist. It’ll be nice to get out for a walk. It’s not very often that I have friends over for visits.”

I couldn’t refuse him, and I liked the fact that he called me a friend. I seem to be running low on those lately. When I married Craig I eventually lost contact with all of my friends, another of the tools he used in secluding me from the outside world. “Okay, lets go then. I didn’t wear any walking shoes, I didn’t plan on going very far.”

“That’s okay, there is a park nearby that we can go sit down and relax in. Looks like a beautiful day.”

Window shopping along the way, I didn’t dare say I liked one thing or another because I knew he would march in and buy it for me. Reaching the park, we sat down together on the nearest bench watching the little kids play on the merry-go-round.

“Why didn’t you and Craig have children? If you don’t mind me asking.”

“He wanted them, I fought it. I guess I knew in my heart that I didn’t need any more strings holding us together.”

“So do you want children?”

“Oh yeah definitely. With the right guy. How about you?” I asked wondering if the notorious Grant could ever be settled down enough for babies.

“Yes, someday maybe.”

Reaching over and squeezing his leg, “You’ll find the right girl Grant. The one that you want more than one night. That person that when they leave, two seconds later you are already missing them. The same person that when you’re holding them close, it’s not close enough. The person that gives you butterflies in your stomach every time they look in your direction.” Looking at him, he was staring at me intensely. “I’m sorry, my mouth runs away with me.” I hated to admit to myself when I thought of those things, I thought of Ian.

“No, that’s perfect Lizzy. Who ever you decide on is the luckiest guy in the world. Craig was an idiot.”

“Thanks Grant. That’s sweet.”

“One problem, now you’ve made me want you more.”

Shaking my head, “I don’t know what to say, when you say those things.”

“Um, that you want me to?” He said smiling.

Laughing, “You never give up.”

“If my brother doesn’t pull his head out of his ass soon, I’m going to have to pull out the big guns.”

“I really don’t know what to say when you say things like that, and big guns? Here I thought you already had.”