One-Click Buy: November Harlequin Presents (112 page)

‘Sleep,' Lily said softly.

‘You're here?' She sensed his confusion, moved quickly to douse it—touched his beautiful face with her hand and willed him to rest, knowing instinctively now the right words to say to him.

‘I'm here because I want to be.'

She watched the moon move across the sky, watched the sun rise on another morning, watched bag upon bag of fluids seep into his veins until the sun rose on yet another day, stripping the grey and tipping the world into colour, a lazy blush crawling into the room, his cyanosed lips flushing red, the exhausted rise and fall of his chest slipping into an easier rhythm. And for the first time in her adult life Lily allowed herself to be looked after. Sipped the coffee Emma brought, squeezed her hand as she disappeared as silently as she'd come—felt from her sister-in-law the acknowledgment of the love she had for her brother, real love, because whether or not he felt the same was immaterial. Even if she had to leave him because of what he'd done, she'd never stop loving him. True love didn't have to be reciprocated to exist.

‘Hey.' Hunter blanched at the sunlight that bathed him, winced as the pain caught up with him. ‘I thought that you'd left me.'

‘Believe me, I tried.'

‘I'm sorry.' He stared right at her as he said it. ‘Sorry for putting you through this. I never wanted you to find out.'

‘Well, I did,' she said simply. Now was not the time for venom, now not the time to impale him with her pain ‘And I'm not here to make things harder for you now. I'm actually here to say sorry, too—sorry for not realising you were sick when I shouted at you.'

‘I wanted you to leave me.' His brutal admission inflicted a pain that was physical and Lily's vow to stay calm, to not cry at this part, crumbled, along with her pride.

‘You could have just told me that.' Lily blew her fringe skywards, tried to keep her voice calm. ‘You didn't have to sleep with Abigail to make me leave.'

‘I never slept with Abigail.'

She wanted almost to doubt him because it scared her how badly she wanted to believe him, yet truly she did. Now was not the time for lies. His voice was so unwavering, his eyes so direct she knew she was hearing the truth.

‘If I told you I was sick you'd have stayed, but for all the wrong reasons.' Again he confused her, again she lost the thread of the conversation. Massaging her temples, she dragged in a breath, tried to fathom what on earth he was talking about. ‘You'd have stayed out of duty.'

‘What duty?' Lily frowned. ‘Hunter…' His words were starting to sink in—like the letters in a game of Scrabble, a seemingly jumbled mess but which, arranged properly, started to make sense. But she needed clarification, needed that one missing part before she made her next move. ‘Hunter, what do you think is wrong with you?' He didn't answer, just stared up at the ceiling as she gently explained what the doctors had told her. ‘You've got a bacterial infection,' Lily explained softly, ‘a serious form of labrynthitis.'

‘You're telling me I've got an ear infection?' A laugh shot out of his lips, but it changed midway, and Lily glimpsed the burden he'd been carrying.

‘Hey,' Lily said gently, reaching out and taking his hand, feeling the tight grip of his fingers as he held on, as he struggled to stay afloat. She held on, held on to him for just a little bit longer before she regretfully let go, before he took her under, too. ‘You're not the only one to let your imagination run wild—I had you pegged as an alcoholic or drug addict.' She tried to keep her voice light, only she wasn't smiling. Tears spilled down her cheeks as she stared down at him. ‘What did you think was wrong with you?'

‘The same as my father…' Cold with shock, she glimpsed his fear then, his very real, very genuine fear—the burden he had been carrying since the moment they had met. ‘I thought I was going to end up doing to you what he did to her. I kept getting dizzy…'

‘The infection caused the unsteadiness and the headaches,' Lily explained, ‘but it's not just that. The doctor said you're exhausted, Hunter. You're not just tired or a bit run down, you're completely and utterly exhausted. The doctor said he had no idea how you managed to fly in your condition, that it would have been agony. Why didn't you say something? Why didn't you just tell me?'

‘Because it's not your job to worry.'

He said it again, only this time, instead of running off, she faced him, answered him with his own words. ‘It's not that easy, though, is it?'

‘You'd have stayed, wouldn't you?' He fixed her with the bluest eyes she'd ever seen or would see, his powerful question the most intense she'd ever confronted.

‘Not for the reasons you're thinking.'

‘I'm not talking about money, Lily.' He wasn't—that much at least he didn't have to tell her. Even if it had been a marriage of convenience, money had long since ceased to be the issue. ‘You'd have stayed because you felt you had to, out of duty, because, morally or legally, you considered yourself my wife.'

‘No.' She shook her head, closed her eyes on his piercing glare, terrified of revealing the true depth of her feelings, scared of revealing the truth.

‘Lily.' His hand released hers, cupping her face now, daring her to look at him, but still she refused. ‘I'd rather have died alone than have someone looking after me out of duty.'

‘Promise?' She shuddered the question out, forced her eyes open to take in his confused reaction. ‘Promise me that you'll remember that feeling, promise me that you'll be honest with me now.'

Confused, he nodded

‘I'm pregnant.' Hunter's face was absolutely still. Not by a flicker did he divulge his reaction. ‘And, like you, I'd rather be alone than have you stay out of duty—I couldn't stand it.'

‘You wouldn't have to.' He took her hand, sat up a bit in the bed, and even if he was sick, he was still the strong one. ‘Lily, a baby isn't going to make us work, a baby isn't enough reason to be together.'

‘I know,' she gulped, hating the truth but grateful for his honesty.

‘Unless that's what we both want.' She felt her heart stop in her chest, honesty a breath away, and she was scared to take it, so Hunter did it for them. ‘Unless we both actually want to be together.'

It was the worst moment to think of her appearance, but good old vanity attempted to prevail, reminding her of her puffy eyes and running nose, reminding her that even on a hospital bed with a thousand tubes attached she was still facing the most beautiful man she had ever seen and showing him the most fragile, vulnerable part of her heart.

‘You don't believe in love,' Lily pointed out.

‘Neither do you.' Hunter smiled. ‘Philistine.'

‘And you're way too controlling.' Lily clutched at straws as he dragged her back in. ‘I don't know if I want to spend my life—'

‘I was scared of losing you.' His simple admission stopped her in her tracks, his honesty the revelation she needed. ‘I was scared of you balancing on a chair at that bloody house, scared of you driving around, scared of
anything
that might take you away from me. I know I was very wrong. I just didn't want anything to happen to you.'

‘The way it did to them?' Lily offered, because she knew what he must have been feeling, just had never considered it might have been related to her.

‘I've lost or damaged everyone I've ever loved and I couldn't bear to it to happen to you. Couldn't bear the thought of you getting hurt. Couldn't bear the thought of you leaving, but at the same time I couldn't cope with the thought of you staying, only to end up looking after me.

‘I love you.' Hunter said it very slowly and very clearly so there was absolutely no room for doubt. ‘I love you because you're funny and kind and good. I love you because, whether or not you love me, you'd have looked after me even though that truly terrified me. I love you because for the first time in my life I actually wanted to come home…' He was staring right at her as he spoke. ‘For the first time in my life I actually felt as if I
had
a home.'

‘You really love me?' she checked, and he laughed.

‘I love you because even when I'm saying it over and over, you still don't believe it. God, Lily.' Exasperation crept into his voice. ‘I'm lying here telling you all this like some blubbering idiot and I don't even know how you feel. Isn't that proof enough?'

‘You know how I feel,' Lily shot back. ‘Why else would I have put up with you?'

‘Oh, I can think of a few reasons—because I'm loaded, because I'm brilliant in bed, because you're pregnant and feel that you have no choice…' He was joking, sort of, but he was also letting her in, allowing her to glimpse his fears. Both of them were being honest for the very first time, and it felt wonderful.

‘They're not reasons to stay, Hunter, they're excuses.' Lily smiled, treated him to a short, sharp lecture just as she had the night they'd met.

And he confronted her, just as he had the night they'd met.

‘Stop evading the issue.'

‘I'm not.'

‘So what's the real reason you'd be staying?'

She took a deep breath, held it for a moment before diving into the giddy world of being Hunter Myles' s
real
wife, before saying the words she truly thought she never would.

‘I'm staying because I love you.'

‘I
THINK
Cory's getting a tooth!'

Emma's voice carried from the lounge to the kitchen where both Hunter and Lily were frantically trying to prepare a gourmet meal in a matter of minutes while Emma nursed her nephew. Somehow they had to cover up the fact that they'd forgotten that they had asked Jim and Emma to come over for dinner tonight.

Chaos was the norm these days—delightfully so. This was home now. No catered dinners. No working to the housekeeper's schedule. It was chaotic bliss.

Hunter, thanks to finally mastering the art of delegation, was home far more often, only Lily was working now. Her studies were complete, she had a small but steady stream of patients. Just another busy couple juggling the demands of one small baby and two careers—and it was wonderful.

‘Is he sleeping through the night yet?' Emma called.

‘Is she referring to you or the baby?' Lily grinned before cheekily calling back the answer to both questions. ‘If I'm lucky I manage four, maybe five hours!

‘Open this,' she added, handing a jar of sauce to Hunter, who was pretending to be offended. ‘There's some garlic bread in the freezer.'

‘I hope you haven't gone to too much trouble…' Both women's voices trailed off as Emma wheeled into the kitchen and surveyed the chaos, clearly realising they hadn't gone to
any
trouble at all.

‘Em, we forgot.' Hunter actually winced. ‘Sorry! You know, new baby and everything…'

‘That's OK.' Emma attempted a martyred expression but it dissolved into a burst of giggles. ‘Actually, we both forgot, too. We only remembered we were supposed to be coming over for dinner half an hour ago!'

‘Why don't we ring for Chinese?' Hunter suggested, but Emma wrinkled up her nose. ‘Or Indian.'

‘Pasta would be great,' Emma broke in. ‘Actually, I'm a bit off my food—were you like that, Lily?' Emma's cheeks were flaming. ‘When you were pregnant?'

‘God, no.' Hunter answered for her. ‘She ate like a…' He didn't finish, realisation hitting at the same time Jim joined Emma at the kitchen door and handed him his son. ‘You mean…'

‘That's what we've been trying to tell you since we got here, but you were too busy rushing around, fixing dinner. We're having a baby!' Emma's face was shining. ‘It was confirmed this afternoon. I've had a scan and everything and it turns out that I'm ten weeks pregnant!'

‘And you'll be OK?' Hunter checked. ‘I mean, with…' He took a breath then forced the words out. ‘What with your injuries and everything?'

‘I'll need a Caesarean section,' Emma explained softly, ‘and I might not quite make it to term, but apart from that the doctor's pretty confident it will be a normal pregnancy.'

He hugged her, held little Cory in between them and hugged his sister. And Lily knew how big this was for him, knew because he'd told her that he was scared it might never happen for her—knew that with this wonderful news they were moving ever further on. And when Emma and Jim drifted out to the lounge, Hunter confirmed what she was thinking, stared down at his son for the longest time before looking over at Lily.

‘I wanted this for her.' Hunter attempted to voice what he was thinking. ‘When we had Cory…' His voice thickened with emotion. ‘I just wanted her to know some of the joy.' And this time Lily didn't drag it out of him, just helped him along, guilt a visitor rather than a companion in his life now.

‘She's doing great, Hunter. Both of you are doing fine. Your parents would be really proud.'

‘Do you reckon?' Normally he'd have waved her words away—his parents and their appalling relationship, still a minefield where they rarely ventured—but, staring down at Corey, it was Hunter prolonging the conversation. ‘I really don't know how they'd feel if they were alive, but this much I do know…' Blue eyes looked up from his son to her, the three of them locked in an endless circle of love. ‘I'm proud. Proud of you, proud of me…proud of us.'