Outback Sunset (46 page)

After several more months Vanessa began to have the occasional date, if only to convince herself that she was, from an emotional viewpoint, over Bren. She had no intention of becoming involved with any member of the opposite sex, not yet, no matter how attractive he might be. She needed the passage of time to mentally and emotionally work through the disappointment of her marriage, and lay the memories to rest …

When the cast and production crew for
North of the Nullarbor
arrived to film scenes at Amaroo, it was a mixture of heaven and hell for Curtis to watch Vanessa act out the role she had created and developed. There had been subtle and not so subtle changes between himself and Vanessa since Nova’s accident and he accepted, with regret, that the long-established camaraderie between them was gone. Seeing Kyle again was great too, because he knew that Regan had missed her younger playmate, and had even said in an unguarded moment that she was looking forward to attending boarding school when she turned fifteen.

The year since Nova’s death had been a difficult one for Curtis. He had had to come to terms with many things since Nova’s exposure of the affair between his mother and Stuart, and he’d discovered plusses and minuses to the unpalatable revelation. For one thing, he and Stuart didn’t have to talk to each other or pretend they tolerated each other anymore: that was definitely a plus. The relationship between himself and Bren changed too. He no longer felt in Bren’s shadow, as he had all of his life.
As a consequence of that and being several hundred kilometres away from each other, they became more independent as they pursued different interests, with Curtis able to manage Amaroo as he believed it should be managed.

Curtis thought it remarkable that Bren had adjusted so easily to the failure of his marriage, but he was pleased his brother had successfully become a partner in Stuart’s business. Bren had taken to the tourism business like a duck to water. There were changes in Hilary Selby too, and over time she became more human and a nicer person to be with.

On the surface and to those who thought they knew him well, Curtis projected the image of a man who’d found his place in the scheme of things, and was content with that. To some extent that was true except for one thing. The woman he loved completely, to distraction, remained unaware of his love and beyond his reach. Being exposed to Vanessa on a daily basis again was heart-wrenching because he had no idea how he could breach the distance that had developed between them. She seemed serenely confident, in control of her life, and subtly asked questions of members of the production crew let him know that as far as anyone knew there was no permanent man in her life.

He took what comfort he could from that … and her parting words as, a month later, the crew and cast having shot the necessary scenes, prepared to leave Amaroo.

‘You will come to the premiere of
North of the Nullarbor
, and bring Regan with you?’ Vanessa asked just before she boarded the ten-seater,
chartered plane, leased for the flight to Kununurra. As she waited for his answer she helped Kyle up and into the craft.

‘You want me to?’ Curtis returned in that laconic, laid-back way of his.

‘Of course.’ Her smile was genuine. ‘Rest assured, you’ll receive a gilt-edged invitation in, say, about ten months, according to the director.’

Curtis took that information in with a nod of his head. ‘Regan will want to see it. She’s fascinated with the process of filming, and she wants to be a director now.’ He grinned reflectively as his gaze took in his daughter, astride her horse, Crusoe, on the far side of the runway. ‘Last week she wanted to be a veterinarian …’

‘You have to come,’ Vanessa insisted. ‘Don’t you want to see how Amaroo looks through the camera’s lens?’

‘I guess so. Yes.’ He gave in as he’d fully intended to. ‘We’ll be there, me in a monkey suit and all.’

Suddenly her dark eyes sparkled mischievously as she gave him a swift once-over. ‘If I remember correctly, you scrub up very well.’

‘Will Bren get an invite?’

‘Yes,’ she replied. ‘I doubt that he’ll attend, unless it suits him to take Kyle back to Broome for a holiday or something.’ She went up on her tiptoes to kiss him on the cheek. He moved and her lips landed on the right-hand side of his mouth, leaving a lipstick smear. She reached up with her hand to wipe the lipstick away but he stopped her, his fingers closing over her wrist for several moments longer than was necessary.

‘It’s okay,’ his tone was suddenly husky. ‘You’d better go. I think the pilot’s waiting on you, to take off,’ he reminded her that it was time to board.

For the merest moment, a heart beat in time, he looked at her and as she stared back, her brown eyes clouded with some kind of reaction. Unfortunately, he couldn’t define what the look held — a glimmer of, was it wariness or
awareness?
Occasionally, during the filming, he had caught her watching him with an odd, indefinable expression, as if she were seeing him differently. It was enough to give him hope that she was emotionally free of Bren and that she might … what? Come to love him! His inward smile was derisive in the extreme. Fat chance of that.

Still, he knew he’d walk around for the rest of the day with her lipstick mark on him and the memory of her feather-soft lips against his. Christ, he was such a fool, pining for a woman he couldn’t have … He made a big show of helping her into the plane, and then closed the door. After which, shading his eyes from the morning sun, and trying to arrest the depression growing within him, he watched the plane taxi down the runway with Vanessa who was flying out of his life. Again …

Over the hum of the plane’s engine, Kyle got the message — her son could be a chatter-box at times — that conversation was just too difficult, and resorted to reading a book titled
The Blue Banana
. It was one of Regan’s favourites and she’d given it to him before they left. Vanessa sat very still. She pretended to watch the view — a view she was very familiar with — from the plane’s window but inside
she was acknowledging that she felt … strange. While they were airborne and before they reached Kununurra where they then had to wait for a connecting flight to Darwin and on to Sydney, there was ample time for serious reflection, on Amaroo and … Curtis.

She had loved being there. The freedom, the space, the silence. So different from the bustle of Sydney and, in her mind, an overpopulated suburbia. After living in the outback, she still wasn’t used to the cacophony and variety of noises that came with city life. Amaroo had been like a breath of fresh air to her. Seeing everyone again, including Fran, Reg and Warren, being able to ride Runaway almost every day too. Curtis had told her that in her absence the mare refused to let anyone else ride her, and would buck and pigroot anyone who tried to mount her.

A feeling of nostalgia lodged in her throat, making the muscles tighten. She missed the place and, strangely, the admission came that what she missed had little to do with Bren or their marriage. It was Amaroo and the challenge of living in the outback. The life had infiltrated her heart and soul and that was what she missed.

She had missed Curtis too. Curiously, she had been a little hurt when, after her arrival, he’d kept his distance for a week or more. His remoteness caused her to believe he might be uncomfortable in her company because of what had happened between herself and Bren. But then he’d become more sociable and she assumed his initial strangeness was because having a production crew
that, with actors, fluctuated between fourteen and twenty people — stretching Amaroo’s hospitality to the limits — had made him withdraw into himself. God alone knew he had reason to with what had happened over the last twelve months.

Still, no matter how she reflected on it the conclusion was the same — Curtis was different. Quieter and more self-contained, if that were possible, but she longed for the friendliness they’d once shared. Perhaps it had been foolish on her part to think their relationship could remain unscathed with what they’d been through. She had moved on, changed aspects of her life, and so had he.

But, she chewed reflectively on the inside of her lower lip, and wondered, why had it become so hard to dismiss him from her thoughts? The question hammered insistently in her brain,
and
why had he been startled when she’d kissed him goodbye? That was food for thought too. What was she to make of his reaction to her friendly gesture? What was she to make of her response? There had been one and it had nothing to do with them being in-laws.

If she was honest with herself it wasn’t the first time she had been aware of feeling
different
around him. Her kiss had caused a tingling in her lips, a rush of adrenaline down her spine, a sense of attraction towards him, something she had never felt before, and which confirmed something rather strange. She was developing feelings for Curtis!

A perplexed frown marred her forehead as she gave free rein to her thoughts. She closed her eyes to
feign sleep but she knew only too well that no such respite would come as she continued to try to make sense of what was going through her head, in particular
that
response … and whether she harboured deep feelings for the man she had once, so long ago, loathed …

J
une, 1998 Kerri Spanos fussed over settling the folds of Vanessa’s fitted gold satin and sequined gown in her Sheraton on the Park Hotel suite prior to them making their way down to the waiting limousine. It was booked to take them to the Hoyts Cinema complex in George Street.

‘It’s fine,’ Vanessa assured Kerri, amused because she was behaving like the mother of the bride minutes before the opening strains of Mendelssohn’s ‘Wedding March’.

‘I don’t know how you can be so calm,’ Kerri grumbled good-naturedly. ‘This is, potentially, the biggest night of your career. At
North of the Nullarbor’s
preview people raved about it, and your acting. Once the film does the rounds in America you could be looking at an Oscar nomination. And you stand there as cool as a cucumber!’ She clucked her tongue in disgust. ‘Must be your English blood, it’s certainly not the Spanish in you.’

‘There’s no need for me to be nervous, you’re doing a superb job for both of us,’ Vanessa responded lightheartedly, and chuckled at Kerri’s
feigned outrage. She might be coming across as serene externally but on the inside a tumult of thoughts, and feelings, were raging through her as they had for weeks. This movie was an important step in her career and Magnavid, the Anglo-Australian consortium that had put the financials for the movie together, had spent lavishly on pre-premiere promotion. This meant that Vanessa and an upcoming Australian actress, Rachel Griffin, had already done a considerable number of magazine, radio and television interviews to create people interest. But of more importance to her personally was that she would be seeing Curtis again, and the possibilities that might arise from that …

Martin Pirelli,
North of the Nullarbor’s
director, stood near the suite door, waiting. He was forced to issue a polite hurry up. ‘Come on, ladies, it’s not smart to keep the fans waiting too long. Daniel, the promo man, just left a message on my mobile,’ Martin informed them as he opened the door in expectation. ‘He said we really should go. There’s already a crowd outside the complex waiting to catch a glimpse of the VIPs invited to the premiere.’

Vanessa smiled at Kerri. They linked arms as she said, ‘Okay, lead the way, Martin.’

When Kerri Spanos attended one of her large stable of clients’ first performances, she wasn’t able to relax and simply enjoy the show. She spent the two hours of movie time listening, with accentuated hearing, for a variety of nuances shown by the audience. The occasional, surprised intake of breath. Chuckles over clever dialogue. The silence at
dramatic moments and the expectant hush as the film reached its climax. All of that helped her gauge the audience’s response, and over time she had grown wise enough to know that some attendees would love the performance and others would not. What she strove to divine as the house lights went on and people began to file out of the theatre was the audience’s general receptiveness.

Were they talking about the movie or were they discussing where they’d go for supper? She strained to catch anything positive … and eavesdropped unashamedly …

‘Best movie I’ve seen in years.’

‘The man who played Rupert was sensational. Did you catch his name in the credits?’

‘Wasn’t Vanessa Forsythe great? I heard her interview on radio the other day. Did you know that she wrote the movie’s script?’

‘I hated the father, he was so … repressive.’

‘I hope it does well at the box office. I’d love an Aussie movie to win an Oscar. Show those Hollywood types we’ve got what it takes.’

Kerri began to smile as, working her way up the aisle, she took note of the comments being made. People were talking about the movie and that was very good. During its running she had lost contact with Vanessa, but she wasn’t worried because she knew Martin would have whisked her out of the theatre as the credits came on the screen.

She thought the director had a bit of a soft spot for Vanessa. Not that Vanny reciprocated. Since she and Bren had parted company, and been divorced, Vanny had steered away from emotional entanglements,
though she’d dated several men on a casual basis. That was wise of her. She believed her friend needed to get her perspective straight and become heart-whole before she considered falling in love again.

Their limousine stood at the kerb, with Vanny and Martin already waiting inside. Kerri hurried towards it, containing her delight at the audience’s response until she joined them. ‘It’s a hit,’ she said enthusiastically. She slapped Martin on the thigh and blew Vanessa a kiss. ‘They loved it.’

‘That’s the feeling I got too,’ Martin responded, then he gave instructions to the limousine’s chauffeur to move off …

Magnavid had organised a post-premiere party to rival a Hollywood event, at the Royal Sydney Yacht Squadron’s Club at Kirribilli for members of the media, the cast, VIPs and other special guests, one of whom was Curtis Selby …