Permanent (Indelibly Marked) (Volume 1) (27 page)

“Well considering I know you graduated college with honors and that your bedroom was on the second floor of your house, I’m going to say no.”

“Tell me more about you.” She tickled the hair on the side of his Mohawk.

“You are with my family every day, you live my life.” He laughed. “I just want to know more about you.”

She loved Shane’s life. “Why?”

“Because Lindsay Ann, if I didn’t know better, I’d say that you fell from outer space right into this apartment so I could find you.”

“Maybe I did.” What did he want? Why did he want to know so much? Why couldn’t she be the Lindsay he wanted?

He raised his eyebrows.

She wrapped her arms around his neck, breathing in the scent she loved. “From when I was a teenager, I knew I wanted to leave Ohio. When I finally got the courage to apply for a job in California, I didn’t tell my parents until a month before I was supposed to leave. By that time I had this apartment and made all the arrangements. My father hit the roof and my mother cried until the day I left. It was the first truly bad thing I ever did.”

“And I am so glad you did.” He pursed his lips for a kiss.

She grabbed the opportunity and deepened the kiss, opening her mouth and exploring his. Almost instantly she felt the reaction she wanted from Shane and she decided that no matter what she wouldn’t stop him.

She tried to be more open and flirtatious. Since their excursion to the storage facility, it was as if they’d switched roles, with her pushing forward and him retreating. All she remembered that night was being ready to make love to him and him stopping. The fact he wouldn’t make love to her while she was drunk made her want him all the more.

He kissed her harder and she wondered if she should resort to dragging him into the bedroom. She’d even planned for it, changing her sheets and buying condoms. Not sure what else to do, she kissed his ear. “Shane?”

“Yes, I know I should stop, but I need one more kiss.” He kissed her again.

Before she could get the words out that he didn’t need to stop, he stood up, taking her with him. “Well, Miss Lindsay Ann, we have a big day tomorrow, so I will bid you good night.”

While she sat on his lap kissing him, he wasn’t supposed to remember they had a full day of errands ahead. Guys didn’t remember things like errands. That was her job! “Shane.” She practically tackled him at the front door, jumping into his arms.

“We haven’t done this in a while.” He squeezed her. “Everything okay?”

She wanted to yell at the top of her lungs. No, everything was not okay. Shane didn’t want her. She thought he did before, but obviously the feelings had waned, or he’d be making love to her.

Wait. She remembered the most crucial thing. While he called her his girlfriend, he’d never discussed it with her, or said anything further about it. He never said they were exclusive which is why she waited in the first place. She’d hoped for anything other than a passive comment when he needed a favor. “I’m great. I just wanted to say good night again.”

“Night, baby.” He kissed her once more and left.

When the door closed, she crawled on her knees over to the window, peeking over the sill to spy exactly where Shane went. He was a player. She knew that going in, and she would catch him going down the stairs and confront him. There had to be somewhere he went when she couldn’t find him. She strummed her fingers on the carpet as he went inside his apartment. “Damn it.”

With her first plan not working, she stomped into her bedroom to take a shower. Simply to spite Shane, she pulled on the silky knee length dark blue nightgown she bought and sighed, slipping on the matching robe. She’d make a cup of tea before going to bed.

In the kitchen she shook her head, glaring at the wall separating their apartments. The volume on Shane’s television was loud enough for her to practically hear every word. She put the kettle on and picked up her stack of mail when the sound of two men arguing permeated the wall.

“I get it, you’re home.” The yelling grew, and she inched toward the wall. The sound wasn’t characters having a fight on television after all, it was Shane and Dillon.

With her heart pounding, she put her ear to the wall but only made out muffled words. From the sounds of things, the argument was escalating, and she definitely heard her name.

They didn’t need this. Shane didn’t need it, and she spun around, scanning the room until she found her phone. She rushed for it to call Shane and get him over under the guise of an emergency.

A large crash on the wall rumbled through her apartment followed by silence. With her breath ragged and knees weak, she tore out of her apartment.

“Shane.” She balled her fist and pounded on his door. “Shane!”

No one answered. Something jabbed into her skin but she continued to hit the door. Desperate to get inside, she tried the knob and the door opened. “Shane!” She put her hand to her chest. Shane was on the floor near the wall and Dillon lay on top of Shane’s crushed coffee table. “Oh my God.”

“Lindsay.” Shane held his hand up. “It’s okay.”

Okay? Not in the slightest. She ran, skidding her knees across the carpet to get to him. “No it’s not.” She touched his face, swollen on one side from an obvious hit.

“She shouldn’t be here. See what you bring her into.” Dillon moved a piece of the coffee table aside.

“Lindsay, go back to your apartment, I’m fine.” He kept his focus on Dillon.

She shook her head, and assessed how badly he was hurt. “No.”

“Lindsay.” Shane’s voice hardened. “You need to go, all right?”

She copied his tone of voice and set her jaw. “I’ll leave, but only with you.”

“You have her so snowed.” Dillon snarled.

She held her breath, concentrating on Shane. He needed to come with her for both of them.

“Let’s go.” Shane struggled a bit, but got to his feet.

“Let me get you some clothes.” Without waiting for consent, she went to his room and gathered up a few things. When she returned, both men stood glaring at each other. “We can get anything else you need later.”

Shane grabbed her hand. A shooting pain went through her palm and she gasped.

“What the…” He lifted her hand. “What is this?”

“I think I scraped it on the door.” Blood trickled down her hand to her wrist. “It’s no big deal, let’s just go.”

“Hold on.” He let go of her and approached his brother. “I owe you nothing. Figure out a way out of here by tomorrow night.”

Dillon looked at her and she shuddered.

“Don’t even glance in her direction, brother.” Shane charged forward. “This is for hurting her.” He pulled his fist back, hitting him squarely across the jaw.

Dillon fell back onto the shards of the coffee table.

Lindsay covered her eyes.

“You’re trash,” Dillon yelled.

“You’re homeless.” Shane took his clothes and cradling her hand in his, led her back to her apartment.

“Let me get you some ice.” She charged into action.

“You don’t have to do this, Lindsay.” He remained near the door, anger lacing his tone.

She glared, hands on her hips. “What do you mean?”

“You shouldn’t have seen that.”

“Don’t go there.”

“Dillon’s right.”

“About what?” Her stomach fluttered.

He didn’t move, only stared at the floor shaking his head.

She watched him struggle. Was that what happened the night he didn’t show up? She couldn’t live wondering when he would leave her or simply not show up again. “Shane, if walking away from me is what you want, you need to go.”

The whistle of the kettle broke the silence in the room. She walked over to the stove, praying Shane would do something.

“I want to see your hand.” He kicked the door shut, dropped his bundle of clothes and joined her.

“I’m fine.” She attempted to hold her hand out of his reach. “We should get some ice on your cheek.”

“We’re taking care of you first.”

She turned away.

“Lindsay.” He came up behind her. “Let me see!”

“Just go.”

“I’m not leaving my girlfriend with a bleeding hand.” He took her shoulder. “Let me see!”

She spun around, not because of his yelling, but because of the word he used again. “Do you mean that?” Everything in her peripheral vision turned black, and only Shane remained in the room.

“Yes, we are taking care of your hand.”

“Not that.” She clenched her fist. The insecure Ohio girl crept up, and she needed some answers before Shane tended to her wound. “I want to know what you meant when you called me … what you just did.”

“That I’m not leaving my girlfriend with a bleeding hand?”

She pursed her lips willing herself to be quiet.

His faced hardened. “You are my girlfriend and I won’t walk away when you’re hurt.”

All she could do was stand there, trembling.

“Oh.” A smile crossed his bruised face.

She focused on his concert t-shirt, sure that the vintage band members were laughing at her. He bent down and she found herself nose to nose with him.

“You are my girlfriend.”

“I am?” She wished a big boot would come out of nowhere and kick her.

“I didn’t realize there was confusion about it.” He touched her hair.

“I wanted to clarify what that meant.” She dug deep, determined to get it all out.

He kissed her cheek and whispered in her ear. “You are my girlfriend, I’m not seeing anyone else, and I don’t want to. I just thought you knew.”

She prayed she wasn’t dreaming.

“I’m not going anywhere. And … I’m not a big fan of my girlfriend having to rush in and save me.”

“How do you think it felt to see my boyfriend like that?” Her breath hitched at getting to claim him as her boyfriend.

“I guess I should’ve thought about it.” He tilted her chin toward him and kissed her lightly, brushing his lips against hers. “I want to be worthy of you, Lindsay. I didn’t want you to see that.”

“Never think that.” She kissed him again, wrapping her arms around his neck.

They stood together holding each other and kissing. The moment she reached under his shirt he backed up. “Let me see your hand.”

“No.” The cat and mouse game had to end. They had to truly be together.

“Stop this.” He furrowed his brow. “I want to see.”

“You stop.” She grabbed his forearm. “Forget my hand. I want you to make love to me.”

Shane turned away.

*~*~*

Be a man.

When faced with making love to the woman he had hopelessly and utterly fallen in love with, he needed to be a man. Not the kind of man who jumped into bed at his first opportunity, but the kind of man worthy of her, part of a couple. Since the day at the storage facility he’d acted like anything but a man.

“I’m sorry.” Lindsay dashed toward the bedroom.

“Wait!” Letters from the IRS. Doubting his own worth. Dillon. Everything was garbage. In a relationship with Lindsay, he was the man. He would take charge, which included telling her about those letters when he was damn good and ready, not caring about Dillon and being the boyfriend she wanted.

A real man went after his woman. With wide strides, he charged toward the bedroom.

Greeted with an empty room, he went straight for the bathroom, putting his ear to the door only to hear her sniffling. He gave her one warning knock and opened the door. “Lindsay.”

“It’s okay.” She wiped her eyes on one of her baby blue towels.

“What’s okay?” He took her hand.

“It’s okay if you don’t want me.” At his touch, she flinched.

“How can you think I wouldn’t want you?”

“Shane, please.” She hid her face in her towel.

“Please let me show you how much I want you.” He’d never allow her to feel unwanted. He turned her toward him and pulled the towel away.

“I don’t think you do.” She refused to meet his gaze and pulled her robe tight around her.

In the course of the evening’s events he’d missed a ton, including Lindsay’s dark blue satin robe with black lace. “I want you so bad it scares me.” He moved her hands aside and took her all in. “I think I want you so bad I didn’t know what to do.” With a quick pull on the sash, the robe fell open.

“I have never wanted a woman so much.” He kissed her, letting his lips brush against hers, deepening it once she responded.

He slipped the robe over her shoulders. The matching nightgown caressed each of her curves and the reactions he’d fought overtook over him, warming and flooding his body. “Please tell me this is for me.”

“Yes.” The fabric pooled at her feet.

“It’s amazing.” He shimmied out of his shirt and lifted the slinky little number over her head. “But I’ve seen enough of this satin.”

She crossed her arms over her breasts.

“No. I want to see you, baby.” He stared into her face, making sure their eyes connected before his gaze traveled down to her neck and her chest, taking in the yet uncharted territory. “You’re gorgeous.” He wrapped his arms around her and let his lips traverse the same path his eyes made only moments before and took a breath. No matter what he needed, the only important thing was Lindsay.

He dropped to his knees, taking care with every move. He cupped her breast in his palm, appreciating how it overflowed in his hand. Unable to resist, he took a tight, hard nipple into his mouth.

“Oh.” She grabbed at his Mohawk.

His arousal could no longer be kept at bay. He gave in, swirled his tongue over her breast, buried his face in her cleavage, and savored the taste of her skin, fresh from a shower, sweet and clean.

“Shane.” She arched her back.

Finally with the chance to explore her, he continued, kissing her stomach, using his tongue and his lips to trace the smooth landscape she offered.

Without tensing or protesting she let him rid her of the blue satin panties. He licked his lips at his first opportunity to truly touch her and inhale the faint perfume that confirmed he’d ignited her need.

Her voice hitched. “Oh, God.”

“What, baby?” He ran his tongue around her belly button and tickled the inside of her thigh. Though he wanted to taste and touch her everywhere, her comfort was forefront his mind. The way his jeans tightened told a different story, he needed her.