Pieces of Us (26 page)

Resources

Sometimes, we don’t speak up because we’re afraid. Other times, it’s because we feel what’s happening is the norm or that we deserve the pain inflicted. But no one does. Below are resources to contact if you have been a victim of digital or sexual abuse or part of an abusive relationship. The list also includes networks where you can connect to others in the same situation, both virtually and in person.

Digital abuse
, according to a 2009 study conducted by the AP and MTV, is “writing something online that wasn’t true, sharing information that a person didn’t want shared, writing something mean, spreading false rumors, threatening physical harm, impersonation, spying, posting embarrassing photos or video, being pressured to send naked photos, being teased, and encouraging people to hurt themselves” (
CNET News
, 12/3/09). If you or someone you know has been a victim, you will find the sites listed below helpful:

 


That’s Not Cool (www.thatsnotcool.com)
This site focuses on all areas of digital abuse. It also provides information on standing up to the bullying, additional resources, and the opportunity to chat with others who have been digitally abused.


 


A Thin Line (www.athinline.org)
MTV’s
A Thin Line
campaign was “developed to empower teens to identify, respond to, and stop the spread of digital abuse in their life and amongst their peers.” The site provides information on where to get help and what to do if you’re being digitally abused, and encourages sharing your story and getting involved
in stopping digital abuse.


 


Wired Safety (www.wiredsafety.org)
Wired Safety is an online safety and help group. It has information on a variety of digital abuse, including sexting, sextortion, and cyberbullying, and what to do if you or someone you know is a victim. By May 2012, they will offer a teen hotline staffed by teens who
provide assistance.

If you or someone you know has been
sexually abused
:

 


RAINN: Rape, Abuse, and Incest, National Network
(www.rainn.org)
RAINN is the nation’s largest anti–sexual assault organization. Call the hotline at 1-800-656-HOPE or visit the online hotline at https://ohl.rainn.org/online/.


 


After Silence (www.aftersilence.org)
After Silence provides support for rape, sexual assault, and sexual abuse survivors via message boards and
chatrooms.


 


Pandora’s Project (www.pandorasaquarium.org)
The mission of Pandora’s Project is to “provide information, facilitate peer support and offer assistance to male and female survivors of sexual violence and their friends and family” via an online support group, message board, and chatroom for rape and sexual abuse survivors. It also offers a Sexual Assault Lending Library, which lends materials on sexual violence and recovery, free of charge.


 


Male Survivor: National Organization Against Male
Sexual Victimization (www.malesurvivor.org)
Information and referrals for male survivors of sexual assault and the professionals working with them. There are referrals to local resources and a discussion board, chatroom, newsletter, and online bulletin board.

If you or someone you know is in an
abusive dating relationship
:

 


Loveisrespect (www.loveisrespect.org)
Loveisrespect, a national 24-hour resource that can be accessed online or by phone (1-866-331-9474 & 1-866-331-8453 TTY) is specifically designed for teens and young adults. The helpline and online chat offer real-time, one-on-one support from trained Peer Advocates. There are also quizzes and information on what to do about dating rumors, how to determine if you are in an abusive relationship, etc.


 


The National Center for Victims of Crime
The Dating Violence Resource Center (http://www.ncvc.org/ncvc/main.aspx?dbID=DB_Dating
ViolenceResourceCenter101)
portion of this site provides information on how to determine if a relationship is abusive and how to seek help if you or someone you know is in an abusive relationship, along with a hotline and additional resources (like how to create your own teen outreach project to raise dating violence awareness).


 


The National Coalition of Anti-Violence Programs (NCAVP) (www.ncavp.org/AVPs/default.aspx)
The NCAVP is a “coalition of programs that document and advocate for victims of anti-LGBT and anti-HIV/AIDS violence/harassment, domestic violence, sexual assault, police misconduct and other forms of victimization.” The site addresses a variety of violence issues against the LGBT community and also provides a comprehensive list of local anti-violence organizations to contact for help.

Photo by Samuel Peltz

About the Author

Margie Gelbwasser’s debut YA novel,
Inconvenient
, published by Flux in 2010, was named a 2011 Sydney Taylor Notable Book for Teens. When not writing about secrets in suburbia, she likes cooking, hiking, and being with her husband and four-year-old son. Visit her online at www.margiewrites.com.