Play Softly (The Devil's Share Book 4) (4 page)

Fast forward two hours and it was time to start pushing.

Luke stayed around for a while, until they rolled in a giant mirror so Lexi could watch herself try to push this baby out. Then he hightailed it to the waiting room.

“I really don’t think I want the mirror.” Lexi’s hair was piled on top of her head and the bed was positioned so that she was now sitting up some. Her hospital gown was up around her waist, everything down south was exposed, and Lexi didn’t seem to give two shits about it. I guess it was true what the books say: once a woman’s in labor all sense of modesty goes out the window.

One of the nurses, the one Lexi seemed to like, laughed. “You don’t have to use it the whole time, but it’ll help you see the difference between the effective pushes and the not-so-effective ones.”

“Okaaay…” They positioned Lexi’s feet up in some stirrups and tilted that giant mirror down toward her hips.

I wasn’t so sure I wanted to watch either. My stomach was in knots, my back was killing me from sleeping on the tiny couch, and I was scared as all get-out. I was about to be a dad. I didn’t dare say any of that to Lex though. She was going through way more than I was. “You good, Kitten? I’m right here, okay?” I was by her head, whispering in her ear.

She nodded and squeezed my hand when the nurses told her to push. She didn’t really make a sound, just bore down and turned beet red.

“Lexi, open your eyes, sweetheart, look in the mirror so you can see what you’re doing. That push wasn’t helpful.” Nurse number two.

“Not helpful? I think I just popped a blood vessel in my eyeball.” Lexi threw her head back and took a deep breath, pushing again when they told her to.

This time she looked at the mirror, so I did too. Seemed fair. “Holy shit. Oh my God. What is that?”

“Good job, Lexi. Did you see the difference there? That dark area is your baby girl’s head. She has a lot of hair.”

My jaw dropped open. “That’s her head? That’s the baby?”

Nurse number one nodded. “Yep. That’s her.”

Lexi stopped pushing and the baby’s head went away. I chuckled. “Huh, it sort of looks like a dinosaur eye.” The room went silent. “You know, like it’s winking at us.” If looks could kill… “Sorry.”

“Okay, Lexi, it’s time for another push, you ready?” Nurses one and two both started counting, and Lexi started pushing. And that’s how it went for another thirty minutes. And then, the baby’s head didn’t disappear. Lexi pushed and the baby just sort of stayed there when she let up. “I’m going to go grab Dr. Solomon, another couple of tries and your baby girl will be here.”

Nurse number one left the room and Lexi grabbed hold of number two’s hand. “Can we move the mirror now? Please? Does that make me a bad mom that I don’t want to watch? Do I suck?”

She laughed. “Of course not, sweetheart.” She moved the mirror to the other side of the room and then made herself busy putting on a gown and a fresh pair of gloves.

I looked down at Lexi. “I love you so damn much, Kitten.”

She smiled. “I love you too.”

“We’re going to have a baby.”

She nodded, exhausted but glowing. “We’re going to have a baby.”

Chapter Six

Lexi

Labor was hard, but delivery? That really took the cake. After the baby was born, Dash followed the nurses to the little side area where they cleaned her up and took her weight and measurements. I was watching them from across the room, trying to see through my tears, when I noticed that Dr. Solomon was still down between my legs. Turns out she was sewing me back together.

Luckily the end result was nothing short of a tiny miracle. I looked down at my sleeping daughter and teared up for the two hundredth time since she was born less than two hours ago. “She’s so beautiful.” And she was.
I know, I know, everyone says that about their kid, but this girl is extraordinary
. She had Dash’s hair and she scrunched her nose the way I did.

Dash reached out a finger and rubbed her round cheek. “She’s perfect, Kitten.” He rested his head against mine. “Thank you so much. Thank you for her.”

“You ready to share her with the rest of the family?”

He chuckled. “No. But I know they won’t leave until they get to see you two with their own eyes.”

Dash and I had asked that it just be the two of us in the delivery room, and then we’d spent over an hour in bed with her. Taking turns holding her, skin to skin. It was so surreal, so amazingly surreal. Every time I looked at her, I couldn’t believe she was here. Just like Dylan said, she was tiny, about five and a half pounds and seventeen inches long. But she was strong, and she was healthy. Eating and breathing on her own.

"Just open the door, I’m sure they are all still sitting right outside.”

Slowly, Dash got off the bed, careful not to jostle me or wake her, and opened the door to my room. He laughed. “Come on in, come meet the newest member of the family.”

I turned her around so that she was facing out and everyone could see her. They all crowded in close, oohing and ahhing over how freaking adorable she was. They weren’t wrong. “Everyone meet Halen Grace. Halen, meet your family.”

Jacks raised an eyebrow. “Halen? Like Van Halen?”

I nodded. “Yep.”

Smith smiled. “I love it.”

Landry was leaning against Bryan’s side, clearly exhausted from being in the hospital for so long. Jacks put his arms around his girls. “Congratulations, guys, we’re so happy for you.” He looked over at Dash. “What was it like?”

Tears came to my eyes yet again. Jacks hadn’t known about Landry until a few months ago. He hadn’t been there to watch her come into this world, and I think it was just now starting to hit him exactly how much he’d missed. Dash smiled down at our daughter. “It was the most terrifyingly amazing moment of my life.”

Smith chuckled, breaking the emotion in the room before it overwhelmed everyone and upset Jacks. “But what did it
look
like?” Dylan smacked his chest with the back of her hand.

Dash took a deep breath and let it out loudly. “It looked like a dinosaur winking, and then it looked like a flower opening and closing back up. Like her body got turned inside out and—”

I held my hand up. “That’s enough. Thank you.”

Dylan shook her head. “Lexi, Dr. Solomon told me you did great. And that the baby is healthy and perfect.”

“She’s all that matters. I don’t care what it looked like. I don’t care that I have stitches holding my shit together. I don’t care that my right nipple is bleeding. As long as Halen is healthy, then I am happy.”

Landry’s eyes got big. “Aunt Lexi. Why is your nipple bleeding?”

Jacks nodded his head down toward his daughter. “We’re going to get this one home and into bed. We’ll come by and see you in the morning.”

Dylan grabbed Smith’s hand and tugged him toward the door. “We should go too, give you guys some time alone. I know you’re exhausted, Lexi. Try to get some rest if you can.” She blew us a kiss then they followed Jacks out the door.

I looked over at Dash. “Could you go find out if I can eat? I’m really hungry.” I gestured with my head toward Luke.

Dash nodded, kissing both Halen and me before leaving the room.

I held Halen out to my best friend. “Come hold your goddaughter.”

Luke’s eyes went wide. “Goddaughter? For real?”

“For real. We decided it months ago.”

Luke came over and sat down next to me on the bed and gingerly took Halen from my arms. “She’s so beautiful, Lexi.”

“Yeah, I make pretty babies.”

“I’m happy for you.”

I leaned my head on his shoulder, “I know you are, Lukey.”

“I’m happy for all of it, Lex.” He took one of her tiny hands in his. “For her, and for your engagement.”

I wiped a tear from my eye. “Thank you.” We sat that way, silent and together, until Dash came back with a tray of food.

“I found some grilled chicken and mashed potatoes.” He sat the tray on the little rolling table next to my bed.

Luke stood and handed my daughter back to me. “I’m going to head to the house, let you guys get some rest.” He kissed my head and then hugged Dash on his way out. “Congratulations, man.”

Chapter Seven

Dash

It’d been three days since we’d had Halen. They’d kept us at the hospital since she was a preemie, which meant we’d had three days full of checks and nurses and visiting hours. By the time we left, we were all more than ready to be back at home.

Since we were moving to our compound in Texas in a couple months, we had set up a cradle in our bedroom at the beach house. No point in getting a nursery ready and then turning around and packing it all up.

There were a lot of drawbacks to living in a house filled with six other people, but constant help wasn’t one of them. Since Halen had come early, we’d had nothing ready. While we’d been in the hospital, Dylan and Bryan had taken care of everything. Washing Halen’s tiny clothes, stocking up on everything Lexi would need, getting our room situated, renting us an SUV, installing the car seat. Everything.

“Welcome to your temporary home, Halen.” Lexi slowly followed me into the house. She was still sore and moving like an old lady. She also carried a doughnut to sit on wherever she went.

I walked into the living room and sat Halen, still in her car seat, on the ground. Dagger walked over and gave her a sniff. We’d sent home a baby blanket with Jacks and Landry today so that Dagger and Crash would get used to the baby’s smell before we brought her home. Crash was still a crazy hyper puppy, so he was in his crate sleeping peacefully on a pile of pillows. Dagger looked up at me and then walked over to Lexi, sniffing her as well. Then he lay down on the floor next to the car seat.

“He loves her.” I grabbed my phone and took a picture. It was something I did every few seconds it seemed. I couldn’t help it. Every moment with Halen was precious and needed to be captured.

Lexi put her doughnut down on the couch then lowered herself to sit. “Of course he does, she’s the most loveable person ever born.” Lexi glanced at her watch. “Where is everyone?”

I looked around the abnormally quiet house. “I don’t know. I texted Smith to let him know we were on our way. Maybe they went to get an early dinner?”

“It’s weird being here, just the three of us.” Lexi rubbed Dagger’s belly with her foot.

I took my sleeping daughter out of her car seat and snuggled down on the couch next to my fiancée. “Yeah. It is.”

Lexi’s eyes filled with tears. “Pretty soon it’s always going to be like this.”

We were all moving into separate houses soon. We were all on the same property, but there were a few acres between all of our places. We’d spent the last year crammed together, first the tour bus and then this beach house. “I’m sure we’ll see each other all the time, Kitten.”

She nodded, biting her lip. “It just won’t be the same, you know?” She reached out and rubbed her knuckle softly against Halen’s cheek. “I won’t know what time Luke gets home, or if Smith is having a rough day. Dylan won’t force me to eat disgusting granola for breakfast and Bryan won’t help me feed it all to the dogs. I won’t hear Landry playing the drums or see the look in Jacks’s eye while he watches her. It’ll be lonely.”

I cradled Halen in the crook of my arm and put my other one around Lexi. “Well, then we’ll just have to fill the house with kids to make sure you never feel alone.”

Lexi leaned her head back against my arm and narrowed her eyes. “If you weren’t holding our infant daughter, I’d punch you.” She gestured down to her lap. “I still have stitches in my girly parts, and you want to talk about more kids? No sir.”

I ignored her comment and grinned. “There are still a couple of hours before she needs to eat. Why don’t you try to get some sleep?”

Lexi’s body tensed up at the thought of breast-feeding; it hadn’t been going so well. “It’s too quiet in here, and now I’m all freaked out about having to try again.”

Too quiet meant there was no one else around to make sure I did everything right while Lexi slept. She was sort of insane with new mom anxiety right now. Apparently it was normal. “Kitten. You don’t have to do anything. The hospital sent formula samples home with us. And Dylan bought you that breast pump…”

She shook her head. “I said I’d give it a shot, and I will.”

The front door opened and the house filled with noise. Lexi grinned, leaning her head back against the couch. “That’s more like it.” She was asleep within seconds.

We all sat in the living room, passing a sleeping Halen around and talking quietly while Lexi slept. When my girls had finally woken up, Lexi and I retreated to our bedroom so we could feed Halen and then get her ready for bed. Which didn’t make much sense to me, because it looked like she was always wearing pajamas, and it wasn’t like she had done anything to get dirty. But hey, wouldn’t argue with a hormonal new momma. I’d learned that the hard way in the hospital when I’d suggested Lexi swaddle her a different way. “Why don’t you go take a nice long shower and relax? I’ll get her ready for bed.”

Lexi looked longingly toward the bathroom. “You sure?”

“Absolutely.” I was pretty sure my fiancée assumed I was incapable of taking care of our daughter by myself for more than three minutes. Which wasn’t the case. She’d just never given me the chance to shine.