Pretty Pink Ribbons (39 page)
“What is that?” I yell, pointing toward the large white thing stretched across the ground.
“I don’t know,” my tandem instructor responds. The closer we get, the larger the white thing gets, and slowly, little red dots show up against the white background. My eyes squint, trying to see what it says, but I just can’t—we’re too far away. Clouds are flying past us but I feel like I’m floating, and despite all of the wonderful things that I know I’m missing, I can’t seem to take my eyes off that darn white thing.
A feeling deep in my gut tells me that something is going on, and that whatever this is, it’s important. So I keep my eyes on the big white thing. As we get closer, the red dots begin to form shapes and the shapes soon become words.
Oh. My. God.
“Get me down there, Dave!” I yell, my heart fluttering in my chest. He chuckles in my ear and it doesn’t take me long to realize that he knows exactly what this is. He was probably in on it.
“We’re falling as fast as we can,” he hollers in my ear. I can feel chest bounce, presumably with laughter.
“Faster, Dave! I need down there now!” My body is trembling with excitement. My heart is slamming against my ribcage, and it isn't because I'm free falling toward the ground.
WILL YOU MARRY ME? is plastered in large letters on an enormous white banner, and my mind works furiously to try and figure out how I can get that thing home.
“Congratulations,” Dave says, patting my arm.
“Don’t congratulate me yet. He still has to say the words!” A giddy laugh bubbles from my throat. He directs me on how to land as we glide toward the ground. My feet slip when we the hit the grass, but Dave grabs ahold and manages to keep me upright. The chute floats down around us, but my eyes are locked on the gorgeous man kneeling next to the banner. His beautiful blue eyes are focused on mine and I stand there, completely still, numb with happiness as everyone works to free me from my harness.
“You’re good to go,” Dave whispers, nudging me in the arm. My feet are moving and before I know it, I’m standing in front of the only person who owns me, heart and soul.
“Hi.” Levi’s magnificent smile lights up his entire face, and I have no choice but to smile back.
“Hi.” My giggle turns into a broken cry and my hand flies to my mouth. Tears burn the back of my eyes as I wait for him to say something else.
“How was your jump?” he asks, sounding calm and unaffected, the exact opposite of how I feel.
“It was amazing,” I whisper, removing my hand from my face. “I had the best view in the entire world.”
“I was hoping you’d say that.” Tears trickle down my face and I let them, because they are happy tears. Levi swallows hard, dips his hand into his pocket and pulls out a black velvet box. “Laney Jacobs, you are the most amazing person I’ve ever met. I’ve loved you for as long as I can remember, and I’m going to love you long after I leave this earth. I can’t imagine going through this life without you by my side. Will you marry me?”
“Yes,” I gasp, catapulting into his arms. “Yes.” My mouth fuses to his, my hands tangling in his silky hair. His arms wrap around me, his warm hands cradling my neck. He pulls back and my mouth follows his, so he kisses me again, swallowing my laugh.
“You’re going to be my wife,” he says, his eyes bright and brimming with tears.
“I can’t wait,” I whisper, grabbing his tie and pulling him back to me. Everyone around us is clapping and cheering, and a warm sensation crawls up my chest, infusing my neck.
“Wait,” Levi says, digging into his pocket. He pulls out a tattered piece of paper and then looks around. “I need a pen! Who’s got a pen?” Someone tosses a pen at us and Levi catches it midair. Holding the paper against his thigh, he makes a mark and then hands the paper to me. My eyes dart to the words and then back to him, my breath catching in my throat.
“My bucket list,” I breathe, my eyes darting back down. “You’ve had this the whole time?” He nods his head and I take the paper from him, my eyes skimming over the words.
“There are only four things left,” he says. My eyes snap to his and he gives me a devilish grin.
“I can’t wait to check them off,” I say, earning another kiss from—“My fiancé.” I smile when the word rolls off my tongue. “I liked the sound of that, although I’ll be happier when I have your last name.”
“Me too, baby. Me too.” Levi steps away, and for the first time I notice all of our friends standing off to the side. Luke, Benny, Mia, Harley, Tyson, Max, Mason and Quinn are all smiling widely, and I wave at them before looking back down at my list.
One year ago I was on the brink of death, and I feel so incredibly lucky that I’m here now. Honestly, I don’t remember my time in the ICU, but Levi and everyone else has told me stories about how scary it was. By the time I woke up, the pneumonia was gone, but I was still being treated for the sepsis. I was told it was touch and go there for a while, and that there was even a moment where they thought they had lost me. I don’t like to hear that story.
It especially hurts to hear about how Levi was ripped from my room, and Mia and Benny told me that he’d been an absolute mess afterward. Apparently, he became a complete introvert, refusing to leave my side. Mason had to bring him clothes and practically forced him to take showers. He didn’t eat and barely slept, and the thought of him going through that breaks my heart.
I’m glad everyone was there for Levi when I couldn’t be. We’re incredibly blessed to have such an amazing support system. Luke, Mia, Benny, Tyson, Harley and Mason have been there with us every step of the way, and Levi and I couldn’t ask for a better group of friends.
My eyes drift over to Levi, who is talking animatedly with his hands. Everyone is standing in a circle, hanging on his every word. My gaze slowly makes its way around the circle. Harley’s hand is rubbing circles around her swollen belly, and Tyson’s arm is wrapped firmly around her waist.
Benny and Mia . . . well, they’re Benny and Mia. They still fight all the time, but when they think no one is looking, they’re really quite sweet to each other. Mia finally got a place of her own, and Benny jumps at any chance he gets to go over there and help her out. I just know something is going on there, but I haven’t quite figured it out.
My baby brother is still a workaholic. I’ve tried to set him up with a few of the nurses from the treatment center, but he won’t have any part of it. It seems he’s forever the self-proclaimed bachelor.
Mason is standing next to Quinn. He thinks that no one notices, but we all see the way he looks at her. I met Quinn shortly after being released from the hospital. Harley introduced the two of us, and we became fast friends.
Speaking of the hospital, I never finished my last few chemo treatments. Once my body was stronger, I went straight into radiation, which was every day for six weeks straight. It was exhausting, but for me it didn’t hold a candle to the chemotherapy. I’m lucky, I guess, because I’ve heard some horror stories about the side effects people can have. It took a while for my body to feel normal again, but I eventually did get there.
I’ve started the process to get my breast reconstruction which is so much more than simply getting a breast implant. I’ve had to wear an expander for nearly a year to help stretch out my skin, and I’d be lying if I said it hasn’t been painful. But the pain will be worth it. Levi has told me time and time again that he loves me no matter what, but I want it for me, not for him. I hate wearing mastectomy bras and I want to feel normal again. Well, as normal as I can feel. I’ve done my research, met with my doctors, and I know that it’ll never look perfect, but anything is better than this horrible scar over my sunken chest. At first I was worried about the cost of the surgery. I have better insurance now, but I didn’t want to get into money trouble like I was.
It wasn’t until several weeks after my release from the hospital that I realized Levi had paid off all my debts. I didn’t even have it in me to be mad, because I knew where he was coming from. I would have done the same thing if the roles were reversed.
So, I did the only thing I could do . . . I thanked him and promised him sex anytime he wanted it. Let’s just say he’s been cashing in on that nearly every day, but I’m not complaining. In fact, you’ll never hear me complain again. Life is precious and I’ll never take it for granted, because I’ve learned just how fast it can all be taken away.
Closing my eyes, I tilt my face up to the sky, my bucket list clenched in my hand. I thank God for this second chance at life he’s given me, for my brother and the incredible friends I have, and for Levi.
Always for Levi.
THE END
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Books
Pretty Pink Ribbons
I am currently co-writing a book with BT Urruela and we are extremely excited about our collaboration. We expect to release
A Lover’s Lament
in fall 2015. You can check out both of our webpages and social media links for further information.
In a matter of seconds my entire world changed, and it was in that moment that I stopped living and simply began to exist.
In my grief, I sent a letter to a stranger. I hoped in writing it, I’d find some peace from the nightmare I was living, some solace in my anger.
I didn’t expect him to write back. I wasn’t prepared for his words, and I certainly wasn’t ready for the impact this soldier would have on my life. A deep-rooted hate transformed into friendship and then molded into a love like I’d never known before.
Sergeant Devin Ulysses Clay did what I couldn’t: he put the shattered pieces of my heart back together, restoring my faith in humanity and teaching me how to live again.
But now that I’m whole, I have a decision to make. Do I return to my life as I knew it and the fiancé I’ve left waiting, or do I walk away from it all for the man I’ve never actually met—the man who doesn’t even know that he holds my heart in the palm of his hand.
* * *
I’ve been living in hell, but you won’t hear me complain.
These men depend on me, as I do them, and this brotherhood is the only family I’ve ever known.
The Army saved me from a callous mother and a life on the wrong side of the tracks that was quickly spiraling out of control. So unlike most of the men in my platoon, going home wasn’t something I longed for.
I was content overseas, spending my days defending this country that gave me my life back. Fighting became my new normal . . .
until her.
A letter from Katie Devora—a letter that I almost didn’t open. Her words put a fire back inside of me that I didn’t know I’d lost. She gave me hope during a time when I was fighting every day to stay alive, and now it’s time I fight for her.
Pretty Pink Ribbons
holds a very special place in my heart because at the age of twenty-nine, my sister Casey was diagnosed with Stage III Invasive Ductal Carcinoma. Although six years has passed and she is now considered cancer-free, that moment in time is forever ingrained in my mind. There are several people who recognized the importance of this story and encouraged me, plotted with me and helped me get the story to where it is now.
Tom, aka the most wonderful husband in the universe—I absolutely could not have written this book without you. Thank you for making dinner, stepping in to do the dishes and vacuum the floor, and thank you for the countless times you got up at the break of dawn with the kids because I stayed up way too late writing. Thank you for understanding and encouraging my passion for writing and for this story. Thank you for being the best husband and father in the entire world. I’ve told you before and I’ll tell you again, every single good quality I write in a man is written about you. You are, hands down, my number one book boyfriend.