Promise Me (7 page)

"I can't be with him like that. Not only because of the whole boss thing, but because of you know what too," I say warily and look over my shoulder to make sure no one is within ear shot.

"I know, sorry. Listen, just keep it as professional as possible and most importantly, do not be alone with him."

"Alone with whom," I hear a familiar voice say.

Alex. Damn it all to hell! Just my luck. He walks up right at this moment. Julia looks at me like she's a deer caught in the headlights. She quickly recovers, turns to him and says, "Oh, no one in particular, just girl talk, you know."

"Julia, would you give us a moment please?" He asks, keeping his eyes on me the entire time. Since I know she doesn't think I should be alone with him, I already know what her answer will be.

"Sure, no problem. See you at home, Sabrina."

Traitor. Benedict Arnold. I can't believe she just did that. I'm staring at her in shock as she quickly marches out of view until I hear her far off voice instructing her remaining staff to pack it up, or else. Coming back to the task at hand, I look at Alex who is trying to stifle a grin, but it's not working too well.

"Don't laugh, it's not funny," I say while I try to keep a straight face.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have snuck up on you both like that. That was very rude of me."

He starts to close the space between us, so I automatically put up both my hands to stop him before he gets any closer. "Alex, I can't do this. Please don't make this any more difficult than it is."

"Fine, understood," he stops and then quickly nods, "I didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable, Sabrina. The last thing I want to do is lose you."

I look at him with a raised eyebrow in confusion before he clarifies further while grinning, "As a business colleague."

He starts walking towards me again, causing me to move backwards until I reach the wall. He stops just an inch or two away from me, never breaking eye contact. "I think I may have waited too long," he says. I open my mouth to say something back to him, but he puts up his hand to wave me to stop before I even start. He's so close and for a split second I want to forget everything and just kiss him senseless. I lick my lips in anticipation, bringing his gaze to momentarily focus on them before he breaks the silence between us.

"Sabrina, it's no secret how I feel about you. I've wanted to say something to you sooner, but it never seemed to be the right time. I'm sorry if I've made a mess of things between us, but I just couldn't wait any longer."

His eyes show a trace of defeat in them. It makes me want to tell him how I wish things were different between us. It makes me want to not get on that plane in a couple of days. It makes me close the gap between us and pull his lips to mine. His lips taste like the most decadent wine I've ever tasted. One of his hands frames my face, while the other has wrapped around the back of my neck to keep me in place. Unlike the kiss from earlier, which was soft and slow, this one is full of desperation. Taking one more step forward, he pins my back to the wall. He takes his hand from my face and runs it slowly down my neck, collarbone, and over my chest until it rests on my hip. All the while our tongues are dancing, finding a rhythm of their own.

Suddenly, he stops and pulls away. "As much as I want you right now, I think it's for the best if we stop," he says and dips his head so that his forehead is resting against mine.

"I'm sorry Alex, I didn't mean to get so carried away."

Grinning at me, he puts his finger lightly on my lips. "I'm not sorry at all. I've wanted that to happen since the very first time I met you."

He takes his finger away and moves back a bit, putting some much needed space between us. "Alex, I think you deserve to know that I do feel something for you, but..."

What do I say? I don't want to really tell him about my trip or about the whole Tyler obsession, so I find myself right back at square one.

"You don't have to say anything to me. Go on your trip. How about we discuss it when you come back."

His smile never leaves his face, making it easier for me to take the temporary olive branch he offered and just nod at his request. He steps further away from me and tips his head slightly, motioning me to leave the alcove. Before leaving him, I turn and say, "Thank you, Alex." Pivoting back towards the hallway, I make my way back to my office, pick up my purse and practically run out the door.

Driving home, my mind is racing at a mile a minute. I can't believe the disaster I have just created for myself. I punch my steering wheel with the palm of my hand, wanting to kick myself over everything with Chris and Lisa, Tyler, and now, Alex.

What is wrong with me? I have the opportunity to pursue something with Alex but what do I do instead? I run like a scaredy-cat in the opposite direction like I do with every other potential relationship in my life before him. I feel a slight panic run through me at the thought of how my past has taken over my entire life, shaping a lot of my decisions. Something's got to give… soon.

I take a few calming breaths before I decide to turn the radio on. The opening bars of Van Morrison's "
Into the Mystic
" are just starting. I let the song's slow building crescendo seep into me and feel more and more relaxed with every word. I pull into my driveway as the last few lyrics flow from my speakers and sit there for a few seconds before I turn the car off, letting the song wash over me like an antidote to what ails me. Walking inside the house, I head straight to my bedroom, ignoring Julia completely. Closing the door behind me, I fall face first on my bed and mentally replay the lyrics I just heard.

I let the words soothe me until I feel my eyelids grow heavy. I kick off my shoes and wrap the blanket around me, not bothering to even take off my dress. I wish that I can make a decision for once in my life without feeling insecure or even slightly afraid of the consequences. I want more than anything to let go and… just live. Just as I'm about to fall asleep, my cell phone vibrates. I reach over to my night stand to grab it and look at the screen. It's a text message from Alex.

Thank you for giving me a chance...

I stare at it for a moment or two before throwing the phone back on my night stand in defeat. Fuck my life.

The sound of Julia's light tapping on my door wakes me up. I don't want to move, so I just tell her to come in. She walks over to the bed and takes a seat beside me.

"That bad?" She asks.

"You have no idea."

She lifts up my blanket to take a peek and sees that I'm still wearing my dress from the night before. "What the hell happened?"

I give her the recap after she left me high and dry before adding, "Thanks so much for throwing me under the bus." She flips her blonde hair and bats her lashes, giving me her best "who me" look.

"How was I supposed to know you'd end up shoving your tongue down his throat all on your own? Which, by the way, nice job," she says and then lifts her hand to give me a fist bump. When I don't raise mine to meet hers, she looks disappointed. Not one to give up so easily, she reaches over to my arm and forces my hand into a fist to meet hers. "That's better."

"Julia, my head feels like it's going to explode. I'm leaving tomorrow for my ten year reunion which will bring me face to face with Chris and Lisa, and maybe Tyler. If all that stress wasn't enough, now I have Alex to worry about."

I prop up on my elbows when it dawns on me that Julia is still in her pajamas and it's a weekday. She's usually up and about, if not, already out the door by this time.

"Why are you still home anyway?"

"I'm taking the day off, and so are you missy."

Before I can argue my way out of whatever she has planned, she quickly dismisses me and says, "I don't want to hear it. My best friend needs me today. I've already called the gallery for you to let them know you'll be taking an extra day today. As for me, well, what good is being the boss if I can't take a mental day when I need to."

I'm relieved that I don't have to go anywhere today. I drop back down into my bed and curl myself up in a ball under the comforter.

"Um, what are you doing? Just because I said I called the gallery for you doesn't mean I intend to watch you sleep the day away. We have plans today."

"I'm going to sulk."

"No, you're not. Get your ass up and in the shower. We have a spa appointment at The Biltmore in about an hour, on me."

Right before she stands up, she slaps me on my behind and starts to run out of my room before I can retaliate. I stay put, going over in my mind everything from last night with Alex. It's like a twisted cosmic joke that in all the time I've known him he decides now is the right time to make his move. If not for the fact that I am leaving tomorrow, I'm fairly certain I would throw aside my reservations about pursuing a relationship with my boss. I glance over at my cell phone and I feel tempted to text him back something flirtatious but common sense holds me back. At this point, encouraging this situation further would not be wise on my part so I resist the urge. Instead, I reluctantly kick the comforter off of me then traipse out of my room and into the shower. Once I'm done and wrapped in my robe, I amble my way into the kitchen where Julia is waiting for me with a fresh mug of coffee.

"Thanks."

"You're welcome," she says as she leans against the counter.

"So, The Biltmore, huh?"

"Yup. Then, after a day of pampering, we're going to Frankie's for your favorite pizza. Then, come home and watch as many
Felicity
episodes as it takes to cheer you up."

"I love you," I say while smiling at her and take a seat at the table to drink my coffee. She walks towards me, pinching my right cheek and says, "Ditto."

We sit in silence for a few minutes, until she gets up and makes her way back to her room to get dressed. Taking my last sip of coffee, I get up to grab a refill and catch a glimpse of the invitation for the reunion that is being held up by a magnet on our refrigerator. I peel it out from under the magnet carefully and put it on the counter in front of me. Just like all the times before, my heart starts to beat so quickly that I can almost feel the blood running through my own veins. My eyes scan over the embossed words slowly. The whole time thinking of what I would say to him all these years later.

"He's going to be there. I can feel it," Julia says when she makes her way back into the kitchen. She perches her chin on my shoulder so she can look at the invite that's lying on the counter in front of me. "Come on, go get yourself ready for the spa. No talking about dickhead, the whore, Sawyer, or Willy Wonka for the rest of the day. And that's an order," she demands as she reaches around me and snatches the invitation. My lord, she has nicknames for everyone. I shake my head and do as I'm told while she tacks it back to the refrigerator door.

Our morning at the spa was luxurious and relaxing. Julia and I both received an aromatherapy massage, followed by our favorite mango manicure and pedicure. When we settle back into her car a couple of hours later, I'm fairly certain I've never felt more relaxed before in my life. So much so, that while she weaves in and out of traffic, it lulls me to sleep. A soft nudging from her alerts me that we've arrived to what I thought was going to be Frankie's, but as I open my eyes, we're actually in front of a boutique in Coconut Grove.

"What are we doing here?"

"Happy Birthday and Merry Christmas, roomie," she says and grabs her purse from the backseat.

"My birthday is not for another two months and Christmas is in December, in case you forgot."

"Oh, I didn't forget. But you're getting all your presents early. You need them today more than you will two months from now," she explains and steps out of the car into the blazing Miami afternoon sun.

I'm still in the car staring at her as she rounds the hood and stops to look back at me. She puts both her hands on her hips and pouts, effectively making me roll my eyes and get out of the car as well.

"Julia, this is too much." The spa alone must have cost her a nice chunk of change.

"Sweetie," she says and takes both my hands in hers. "You need this. Please let me do this for you. I know that if the tables were turned, you would be doing the same thing. God knows, you've helped me through some crazy break ups in the past. Besides, what's the point of making money if you can't spend it while you're still able to enjoy it? Now, come inside and let me buy you a dress that will blow them away."