Protected (Book 1 in the Ariya Adams trilogy) (23 page)

“No
, Ariya,” Caroline said. “We think they want you to mate with one of them to have a werewolf child. Vampires, they can’t reproduce, but werewolves, they, uh, they can. Their gene gets passed along in their offspring.”

I got off the couch in an uproar. “They want to what?!? No, oh
, my gosh! No! I’m not having a werewolf child. I’m not having any child! What is wrong with you all?”

“We know, we know. It’s okay. They won’t get near you.” Caroline tried to calm me
down.

I pretended to be fine and sat
down. They kept talking, but I wasn’t listening anymore. It was probably showing, and I was sure they could tell I had checked out. This was absurd. My heart started racing, because it dawned on me then that they would get me. Emma was with them and she knew how to make me do what she wanted. She’d threaten Caroline, Nick, or James until I came with her, and then they’d get what they wanted. I don’t know what the exact plan was, but I became frightened. I wanted to be brave, but being used to produce some monster child for werewolves was unappealing to say the least. Why would Emma want to help them when she’s in the bloodline? Maybe she’d give me answers before doing whatever it was she was planning on doing to me.

“I think that’s
enough information for tonight.” James must have noticed I was spaced out.

“Thank you for trusting me and telling me
, guys. I’m sorry you’re in this mess because of me.” Staring down at my hands was the only way to keep fresh tears from coming up. Stupid bloodline.

“We told you
, Ariya, we knew what we were getting into. We get to protect you and kick some werewolf ass, it’s a win-win.“ I looked up to find Nick was smiling at me.

“Well, thank you.”
Steadying my breath allowed the threatening tears to retreat.
Take that, emotions!

We all stood
, with one exception. I looked over at James, who was still sitting on the couch, even though everyone else was standing.

“I have to get back home,” h
e said. “Are you guys good here tonight?” He looked at Nick and Caroline.

“
Yeah,” Caroline replied. “We’re good.” She and Nick headed into her room. James came to stand closer to me.

“Ariya, just because you know doesn’t
mean that things can change, but I hope you can now better understand what I meant before. Why this wouldn’t’ have worked.”

“I don’t know what protectin
g me has to do with liking me. Or, was that what your job was when Nick said to get involved more personally?”

“No, absolutely not.
I was not supposed to get involved in that way at all. It’s against the rules. I just needed to be in your group of friends. Preferably, I needed to be in good with Riley, since he was the closest to you.” I nodded, feeling bad that Riley’s friendship with James had been staged and pre-planned.

“James, does wanting blood really hur
t like you said in your story?”

I hadn’t thought of them having a hard time
around me with my blood before. I should have thought to ask that question, since they are vampires.

“At first it’s difficult
, and if we are around humans and don’t feed then yes, it can be hard. The bloodlust is a curse, Ariya. It’s not a gift. While many of the things you believe about vampires aren’t true, that is one that is. It can become all we think about until we get blood. You can imagine how being around humans can be dangerous if we let go and give into the thirst fully.”

“So is that why it wouldn’t have worked then
? Is it painful to be around me?” It was a question I shouldn’t have asked, but what the heck, at this point.

“No. I can control myself around humans. For me, it’s a dull pain at this point. It’s still there, but not uncontrollable.
It’s not that. Protectors and the royal bloodline have never been mixed. Both were be-spelled by the same warlock, but kept separate in the spell, and that, in our minds as Protectors, means we are different. The originals decreed that we shouldn’t join.”

“
With Caroline, her blood is so diluted that we felt it was safe for her to use it on you to heal you after the incident with Devon and for you to use it to save her. My family though, we are full Protectors. What if we did start something and one day you wanted to turn? I couldn’t turn you. I believe what the other Protectors said, that it would be dangerous for the royal line to combine with another spelled line. And, what if you wanted children one day? I couldn’t give that to you, and it would kill me to watch you with someone else. The two of us wouldn’t make sense, since I can’t reproduce, and the line must continue. It’s better to not be involved at all from the start than to risk any of that.”

It wasn’t worth arguing with
him, but it was a little late not to be involved from the start. The start had been long ago, and I was past the point of no return now, although I didn’t want it to show. Caroline said James was descended from the original Protectors. He took what he did seriously. If he hadn’t changed his mind yet, he never would. There were other things to think about now. Like figuring out how I was going to survive this mess.

I had to realize that. Maybe we would slip every once in awhile, maybe we would do things and say things we shouldn’t, but at the end of the day, it wasn’t going to work out between the two of us
and that was the reality of it.

“Good
night, Ariya.” James squeezed my hand tightly before turning and walking out of the house.

He
moved so fast I couldn’t even get a response out before he was gone. That was a lot for me to take in, and after all of the revelations tonight, I just wanted to lie down.

I crawled into bed and started thinking about all of it. I was part of a bloodline that could save vampi
res. There were Protectors. James was a Protector. James was my Protector. Nick and Caroline were Protectors, too. Devon wanted me to create a werewolf bloodline. I could save dead vampires. Emma was working with Devon and who knows what other werewolves. The thoughts kept coming and coming and continued throughout most of the night.

When morning came around, I decided to go to the gym. After all, at this point, an extra self-defense class couldn't hurt. My body would need to be on top of things, especially if I was going to have to figure out how to defend myself against werewolves and vampires. I wouldn’t go down without a fight.

The group exercise room was empty when I arrived. It was too early for classes to begin yet. The punching bag had been set up already
, though, which was perfect. I walked over and stood there for a moment, staring mindlessly. Then I started hitting, kicking, anything to release the tension and fear that had started welling up within me.

Noticing that I was holding my breath
, I pushed it out forcefully.
Remember all your training Ariya
, I told myself. Relax, breath, go. Once I took a calming breath, I started up again. Rhythmically punching the bag in front of me, using the training I’d been getting since I was a child, I unleashed everything inside of me. I was starting to sweat. It was hot in the room.

Needing to
pause for a moment, my hands fell and rested on my legs. It was then that I realized I wasn’t alone in the room. My body stiffened and I prepared to attack until I saw James walk into my periphery.

“I guess leaving me alone is out of the question now, huh?”
I looked at him a moment before putting my hands on my hips and facing the punching bag again.

It had been silly of me to think that with a monster werewolf on the loose I would hav
e some quiet alone time. I understood things more clearly, now that I knew the whole story.

“Sorry.” He
looked like he truly meant it.

I
finally understood why they were trying to keep things from me now. It wasn’t to keep me out. They had hidden my bloodline from me to keep things as normal as possible. I felt bad, I had been so angry.

“What are you doing
here so early?” he questioned.

“I couldn’t sleep and I’m going to take my self-defense class more than one day a week now. It couldn’t hurt
, right?”

“You d
on’t need to be worried.”

He was so sure
, it made me sad to know I’d probably be betraying him if Emma wanted me to. I’d choose them over my safety. I went back to kicking the punching bag, and he walked around to hold it in place for me.

“Let it out
, Ariya. If you keep your feelings in, they can crush you.”

“It was my grandfather’s wish
, you know. That I work so hard at learning self-defense. He wanted me to be able to protect myself. Apparently, he was the same way with my mom until she had me.” I stopped kicking. “He knew about us, didn’t he?”

I realized he must have if my grandmother knew what she was. It’s not like she would be able to hide that forever
, could she? That’s why he refocused on me when I was born. The story was that once a child was born she had the power, not the mom.

James replied, “Your grandmother told him before they were married. He’s the reason she didn’t turn
, you know. She didn’t want a life without him. It was the truest love I’ve ever seen.” He seemed in awe when he spoke of them. So, James had known them.

“What happened to her
, James?” He was quiet. “Please? My whole life I was told she had a heart attack. We all thought my grandfather went crazy when she died. Was it bad?”

“It was.” He sighed and ran his hands through his hair
, letting go of the bag. “The Protectors have always kept the secret of who the child with the gift is. Around the time your grandmother was due with your mom, there were rumors of werewolves getting closer to figuring out who they should be targeting. We couldn’t understand why or how they knew who we were protecting. We have always prided ourselves on our ability to cover our tracks.”

“
When your mother was born, my father, who is known as one of the greatest Protectors, took her away to hide her. Your grandmother no longer had the gift at that point, so we needed to protect her baby with our best. One night the werewolves attacked your grandparents’ house, thinking she hadn’t delivered yet, and that they were stopping the bloodline. It wasn’t a true surprise, but we weren’t as prepared as we should have been. We thought she was safer since she didn’t have the gift. We didn’t know how it was possible for the information to have been leaked. There were a handful of us there still, a few were with your grandmother. I was pushed aside and so I grabbed your grandfather.”

“You were
there?” I couldn’t believe it.

I knew he was older, Caroline had told me he was 250
, for crying out loud. I knew he was a Protector, too, but I hadn’t really grasped how intimately he must know my family.

“I was her P
rotector.” My heart fell. Poor James. He looked devastated. “I was just about to escape with him, and turned to find that the others with your grandmother had fallen. Your grandfather had to watch your grandmother get killed by a werewolf. He tried to fight me, but my concern was with getting him out. He was innocent and life needed to be saved somewhere.”

“
I had failed with protecting your grandmother, so I would save him if I could. Many protectors were staked that night and killed for good. We couldn’t risk saving so many and revealing where your mother was, so they had to get left behind. We got away, but something in your grandfather snapped. Your grandmother couldn’t defend herself and he told me that no one in his family would ever experience that again. When my father brought your mother back, when we thought it was safe, your grandfather had made it his mission to teach her everything about self-defense. When you were born he knew the gene had passed and you needed the training as well.”

Tears fell from my eyes. My grandfather, who we all thought was crazy, had only wanted to protect us. He was truly in love with my grandmother and had watched her die in front of him
, and there was nothing he could do.

James came out from around the punching bag, “Ariya,
it’s okay. He truly loved you.”

That sent me over the edge. I had judged him for so many
years and he only had my best interest at heart. I stepped into James chest and buried my face. I was in a full-out breakdown. All the information I had learned over the past few hours had been overwhelming. I couldn’t even find comfort in understanding having a breakdown was normal for me with my family’s history, because it meant I was supposed to be a vampire and couldn’t control the emotions.

James wrapped his arms around me. He held me tight
ly and, for a moment, everything felt okay. I wanted so much to stay safe with him, but I wouldn’t be able to. Emma would have her way eventually. Whatever her plan was, she was going to win. I was going to fight it all I could and I wasn’t going to get my friends killed. I would stay here and be comforted while I could be. James had started stroking my head and was repeating that it was going to be all right.

I pulled away after a few more moments. I sniffled and wiped
my eyes and nose with my hands.

“Sorry,” I said.

“You don’t need to apologize. I’m sorry you’re getting overwhelmed with all of this. It’s why I was trying to keep it from you. All of us, we didn’t want you to be hurt.” He brought his hand up to my cheek, wiping a tear away that I had missed.

“It’s better to know. I just have to process everything. My class is going to start
soon. I’d better go stretch out.”

He looked as if he was going to pull me into him again
, but started backing up and walked away. I turned my focus to my breathing and stretching and spent the next hour focused on making sure my movements were swift and sure throughout my class. They would probably come in handy soon. Concentrating on my movements made it so that I could go a whole hour without thinking about vampires, Emma, and the dangers ahead.

Everyone but James was at the house when I got back from my class, including Emma. She was the last person I wanted to see. It had been easy pretending she and Devon weren’t working together when she wasn’t around. I was going to have to focus on keeping a scowl off my face while she was here. She smiled a bit too brightly when I walked in.

“Ariya!
How are you feeling after all the news? Come sit down. Remember, I’ve been through this and I can do it again and get you through it. It’s a lot to take in.”

Just the sound of her voice was causing my body to
react negatively. Closing my eyes for a moment allowed me to work on calming my heart rate down, as I was sure the vamps in the room could hear it speed up.
Get a grip, Ariya!

James walked in the door behind me a minute later. I assumed he had been following me to make sure I was okay. I smiled a small smile at him. It was so hard to
suppress my feelings for him, especially knowing that some part of him felt something, too. Whatever it was between us, it wasn’t going to just disappear overnight. After he was so wonderful today, I could probably extend that to a couple more months of being love struck. I should have known having him being the one comforting me would only cause more distress, but comforting from him was exactly what I had wanted.

“I’m okay,
” I responded to Emma’s question, which I realized I still hadn’t answered. However, she had stopped paying attention to me. She walked up to James and squeezed his arm. He pushed by her with only a small acknowledgement that she was even there.

“I’m going to go hop in the
shower. Will you all be here awhile?” I realized I had to sound somewhat interested in speaking to her and spending time with my friends.

“Of course!
I thought it would be great to get to know each other better. Just you and me today, Ariya? What do you say?”

Emma had taken full advantage of my question and somehow twisted it to have meant me asking if she
specifically would be here awhile. This was a situation where I could agree or raise suspicion. Actually, I doubted anyone would be suspicious about why I wouldn’t want to do something with her. It’s not like my feelings for James or Emma were a secret.

“That sounds great. I’d love to hear more about how th
ings were when you were human and your transition. Is that okay?”

I turned to look at Caroline and James. Caroline was frowning and not bothering to hide it. James just looked confused and worried. I’m sure his concern stemmed from me talking about transitioning. That clearly was a subject that was not
open to discussion with him.

After a moment
, his expression went void again. “Whatever you want, Ariya.” James sounded tired. I didn’t know vampires got tired.

He sat down on the couch
, but Caroline got up and followed me into my room. I knew she was not going to be as much of a pushover as James just was.

“What are you
doing?” she asked. “I thought you didn’t like her?”

“I don’t know
, Care. It seems kind of cool to get to know your great, great grandmother. I want to hear about how things were for her. I want to get some perspective. I know you don’t like her and I probably will end up not liking her either, but while she’s here, I might as well chat with her, right? She isn’t going anywhere. Plus, that will give you all some time off to stop having to watch over me. I’ll be with one of you, and you and Nick can enjoy some time together and James can – “

I had no idea what James did in his free time
, actually. We hadn’t talked about it. “Play hockey or something,” I finished.

She didn’t look convinced
, so I pushed it further. “The emotions thing is really starting to take its toll and I want to hear how she dealt with it.”

Caroline frowned at me
, but seemed to accept that answer. “All right. I’ll see you when you get back then, I guess. You need to remember, Emma isn't one of us, Ariya. I know nothing about her and I don’t trust her.” She walked out, shutting the door to my bedroom behind her.

Caroline was f
rustrated now. If only she knew how right she was. I sighed. I wanted to enjoy these moments of peace and quiet to myself. I had this gut feeling that the bad that had been creeping toward me was close. With Emma requesting some quality family time, it was probably coming in the next few minutes. Would she try something with me, was that the point of this outing?

I showered slowly
, enjoying the loosening up of my muscles after such a hard work out. Reluctantly stepping out, I dried off and sat on my bed to comb through my wet hair. I was in a trance and barely heard the knock on my door. My robe was all that was going to serve as cover at the moment. I was expecting it to be Emma, telling me to hurry up. Instead, it was James. He tried to hide the surprise at the state I answered the door in, and I felt my cheeks flush.

“Ariya, sorry
, uh sorry.” It felt good that he was reacting to me. Ridiculous distraction! Why was he able to do this to me? “I just, are you sure you want to spend time with her?” he said, going back to strictly business self.

“Yes
, James. It’s fine. I’m not a child. I can make my own decisions. You all aren’t far and I doubt anything is going to happen when I’m with a vampire. It’s fine.” He was staring hard at me, trying to get more out of me or possibly figure out the purpose behind my decision to spend time with Emma.