Radiance (45 page)

I’ve said from the beginning that you don’t need me.  You may want me but you’re strong together. 

Love each other hard.  Be thankful every day for the opportunity you found and take pride in the fact that you healed a relationship that was broken.  You belong together, need each other, and I am beyond honored to have been part of what you have for a little while.

I don’t mind being a bridge.  Know I take every touch with me.  Brie

Harper frowned but Elijah wasn’t concerned. 

With a reassuring smile, he said, “She’s being stubborn.  She doesn’t quite get it.  Let’s explain.”  He turned to go and paused.  Running his palm along Harper’s neck, he asked, “You’re sure?  This is the most important choice you’ve ever made.  She’s breakable.” 

Rolling his eyes, his best friend, his lover, replied, “Yes, I’m fucking
sure
.  Don’t tell me
you
doubt how I feel about her after the last few days?” 

“No.  I just wanted to confirm.  I’ll never push you again.” 

“Elijah, I rather
enjoy
when you push me.” 

He blinked.  “Remember that later.” 

“As if I’d forget.”  Harper kissed him roughly and said against his lips, “Let’s go get our woman.” 

Gabriella tried to ignore the sound of everything she’d
ever
wanted outside her window. 

Tears streamed down her face as gentle beauty drifted on the air at the hands of the world’s most dangerous man. 

Shrugging a light sweater over her tank top, she stared at the front door for a long time.

“Are you sure, Gabriella?” Vi asked softly from behind her.

“No but I so want to be.”

“Then you have to take the chance.”  The bodyguard smiled.  “Sometimes, the biggest risks have the greatest rewards.  You’re strong and you have to be a priority.  Don’t forget.” 

The blonde unlocked the door but didn’t open it. 

Brie took two steps, paused, then took another and placed her palm on the carved wood.  Closing her eyes, she whispered, “Please don’t hurt me.  Please love me.” 

Then she opened the door and stepped out on the stoop. 

Less than a dozen feet away in the small gated courtyard, Elijah played the violin while Harper’s hand gripped his shoulder. 

She approached slowly, breathing deeply to settle her mind. 

Arms wrapped around her torso, she stared back and forth between men she’d fallen completely and irrevocably in love with faster than she ever expected and harder than she thought possible for so many reasons she couldn’t explain if asked. 

Elijah brought the song to a close and lowered the violin.  His natural radiance glowed from his eyes, enthralled her yet again and made her
want
.  All of him, always.

Harper’s hand tightened on his shoulder and he had a fierce expression on his face.  After time spent with him, she knew it was fear that inspired it.  She wanted to love him, soothe him.

Both looked as if they held their breath. 

Reaching up, she smoothed the lines on his forehead.  “You should smile more, Harper.” 

“Perhaps you could help me do that.”  His features relaxed.  “You’re the only person who’s ever had the power to make us smile, Gabriella.”

The silence drew out between them.  Three days of pleasure behind them, she had to say the words. 

“You broke my heart.”

“I know I did.  I’m sorry.  Forgive me, Brie.  Let me try again to get it right.” 

Looking down at the ground, she told him, “You can’t take away the water.”  His gray eyes were lighter when she met them.  “Be sure this time.  Be certain you want
who
I am,
how
I am.  I’m still me.” 

“All I want is the woman you are, Gabriella.  I love you more than I’ve ever shown you for longer than I admitted.  I want you as desperately as I want Elijah.  Come back.  Let me love you as you deserve.  Let me show you the man I really am.” 

Moving her eyes to Elijah’s, she whispered, “You are a
beautiful
soul.  I love when you play for me.” 

“You’re the only woman I’ve ever played for, the only one I ever will.”  He blinked against tears that stunned her.  “I want to stop breathing to stop the pain.  You don’t understand how much I
need
you, Brie.  How I’ve missed you.  I need you to love me as much as I need Harper to love me.” 

Through sobs, she answered, “I can’t
help
loving you.  You’re the only men I’ve ever loved.  I don’t want to feel weaker for it.  I want to feel stronger.”

“Let us make you strong, Brie.” 

“Take our love, Gabriella.  Freely given, without condition.”

For almost a minute, she stared at them, thinking.  The sun was coming up, a light breeze lifted her hair across her face. 

Finally, inhaling carefully, she asked, “Would you like coffee?” 

“Yes.”  Harper scooped her into his arms and stared down into her face.  Startled, her arm went around his shoulders.  “You are a
stunningly
beautiful woman, Gabriella.” 

Burying his face at her neck, she felt him take several hitching breaths.  When he lifted his head, he gave her a brilliant smile. 

It made her heart thump hard in her chest.  Reaching up, she traced her fingers from his temple to his chin. 

“You slay me when you smile, Harper.” 

Then she sat up and hugged him hard.  He returned it as he carried her inside.  Elijah followed closely behind and when their eyes met over his shoulder, he winked. 

Vi waited in the entry with her bag when they walked into the villa.  “I’m going to give you privacy.” 

She stepped close to Brie and brushed her curls away from her face.  Firming her expression, she glared at Elijah. 

“Anything happens to her and I hold you responsible.” 

“Understood.” 

The woman with deadly skills grinned.  “Don’t let them get away with a fucking thing, pretty girl.  See you next week.”  When she started to ask, Vi explained, “Hudson is anxious to see your face and confirm personally that you’re safe and no longer being
fucked with emotionally
.”  She shrugged. “His words, not mine.” 

“I’ll call him.” 

“Good plan.  He’ll give no fucks about your privacy.”

With a laugh, she hugged the other woman’s neck.  “Be safe, Vi.  I like having my friends come back in one piece.” 

“I’ll be based in the city for a while.  I have interests there.”  Bending, she kissed Brie’s temple.  “Thank you for showing me a different life, Gabriella.  I’m glad of the knowledge.  However, I admit to being more terrified of your gentleness than an assailant with a gun.  See you soon.” 

She went through the door, the courtyard iron gate clinked into place, and she walked down the cobbled street toward the intersection.  Her high tech bag was slung over her shoulder. 

Elijah closed and locked the door when she was out of sight.

She met his eyes.  “One day…” 

“Not today.” 

Then the men she loved carried her into her bedroom and showed her how much they’d missed her.  Again.

When she’d forgotten her own name, lost buckets of fluids, and took a short nap, she woke exhilarated. 

She called Hudson while she watched Harper and Elijah sleep side by side. 

“Gabriella, your ass is spanked.  What the
fuck
is happening?” 

She grinned.  “Hi, Hudson.  I’ll be back in a couple of days.  I’ve missed you.  Catch me up on everything.” 

After a low growl, he did. 

Curling up in a chair near the window that looked out on the azure sea, she chatted with her best friend and waited for her men to wake up. 

It was the perfect way to start the next phase of her life.

She embraced the light, welcomed it, and it filled her up again.

September 2016 – New York City

Brie laughed with Riya and Tawny.  Their inner circle was in attendance to celebrate the launch of Marciella Canfield’s new grass roots programs to address hunger and homelessness. 

Her ideas were wonderful, realistic, and doable.  Brie was proud of her involvement in the marketing material designs. 

Harper and Hudson were gradually easing up on their open hostility and her best friend confided that he needed to know
Delkin
was serious about his life changes. 

It made her laugh and she kept the information to herself.

Glancing across the room, Brie looked at her men.  Harper was involved in an intense conversation with a man who didn’t look pleased with his responses.  Elijah stood closer to Harper’s back than usual and though his expression was blank, she read the tension that surrounded him.

“Bitch, those heels are hot,” Tawny told her with a raised brow. 

Sighing, she glanced at the platforms that seemed higher than the two inches they really were.  “I have to work my way up.  They’re better than
flats
.” 

“You make it sound like a dirty word.  You’ll get there,” Riya chimed in with a chuckle.  “You look incredible.” 

After leaving Croatia, Brie insisted on taking things with Elijah and Harper slow.  She lived in New York to be closer to her friends and they made a greater effort to take time off. 

Absences were usually no more than a week, a fact for which she was grateful.  Her doctors inserted a non-hormonal birth control device in her uterus to prevent pregnancy. 

She knew losing another child would destroy her. 

Excusing herself, she walked into the hall and found the luxurious ladies’ room.  Using the facilities in formalwear was never an enjoyable experience. 

Washing her hands, she took in her appearance.  Her black raw silk gown was a halter style that clung to her upper body.  It draped perfectly from beneath her breasts to the floor and was shot through with silver threads. 

The majority of her back was bare to just above the crack of her ass and when Harper presented it to her, she told him, “You
love
exposing my back so you’re lucky Elijah is so skilled with the whip or people would talk.” 

Stepping close, he’d responded, “Fuck them.  I love seeing as much caramel skin as you’re willing to expose in public so I can imagine touching it when we’re no longer required to be appropriate.” 

He’d promptly separated the robe she’d slipped on after her shower and taken her hard against the wall of her closet.  Time between them alone had done much to heal old wounds and grow the love they had for one another. 

She thought about the way Elijah entered, kissed Harper and then her passionately, and led them to the shower…again. 

It gave her a pleasant shiver. 

In the small foyer of the restroom was a small seating area.  She perched on the edge of the loveseat there to adjust the strap of her heel.  As she straightened, a gorgeous woman lowered to the seat beside her. 

Turning her head with a smile, the woman sprayed something in her face. 

* * *

Brie’s skin felt sticky and she was completely disoriented.  She tried to open her eyes to see who carried her. 

“You have bandages on your eyes until I can flush them again.  The light makes the effect worse.” 

“Elijah…?”  They were in an elevator.

“Trust me right now, Brie.  Will you do that?” 

“Of course.  Is everyone alright?  Can you tell me?” 

“You were the target, Brie.  Tawny contained the situation.” 

“Gabriella.”  Hudson’s voice spoke close to her.  “You’re alright.  Elijah is going to help you.” 

“I know.  Go back to the gala.” 

“Darling,” Natalia sniffed back tears, “I will personally spank you if you don’t stop saying such outrageous things.” 

Elijah lifted her close and whispered, “Everyone is panicked.  Let them recover and I’ll fill you in when I know you’re safe.  Alright?”  She took a deep breath and nodded.  “Good girl.” 

“I feel…Elijah, I’m going to be sick.” 

“Excellent.  We need it out.”  She felt the floor beneath her feet and he placed her hands on a trash can.  “I’ve got you.” 

She’d never vomited so hard in her life.  The elevator stopped moving and she could tell the doors were open but Elijah stayed with her while it felt as if she threw up everything she’d eaten in her lifetime.  He gently patted her mouth and placed an open water bottle in her hand. 

“Drink all of it.  More will be necessary.” 

He lifted her again and walked quickly.  Doors opened and closed, people murmured, but she couldn’t get anything solid. 

Then she was in a bathroom.  “I’m sorry, Brie.  I have to dilute any remaining residue.  I have to put you underwater.  Hold your breath and tap my wrist when you need me to bring you up.  Do you understand?” 

“Yes.  Hurry.” 

He lowered her into lukewarm water fully clothed and braced his palm on her upper chest to hold her under.  She panicked the first time after only a few seconds and tapped him. 

“I’m sorry.  I-I can hold it longer.  Sorry.” 

“It’s alright.  We have to do this a lot.” 

It seemed like
days
but it was worse when he removed the bandages and told her to open her eyes when she was under.  He drained the tub several times, held her under the running tap as it filled, and continued to submerge her.  Each time she came up, he sprayed something cool on her skin. 

She vomited several more times during and he forced her to drink more water each time. 

Finally, he lifted her up and held her on his lap.  She registered that he was still in the shirt and slacks from his tux. 

“The lights are dimmed, open your eyes for me, Brie.” 

She did and murmured, “I-I can’t see.” 

Elijah growled.  “I need to spray your open eyes.  I’m so fucking sorry, Brie.” 

“It’s okay.” 

He held her lids wide and sprayed the cool liquid in them.  It burned like
fire
on the surface of her eyes.  Her instinct was to rub them and he hugged her arms against her body. 

“You can’t, sweetheart.”  That was when she started to cry.  “I know.  I know it burns.”  He kissed her hair.  “You’re being so strong.  Trust me.  Please trust me.” 

“Of
course
I do.  Of course, Elijah.”  She forced the words through sobs she couldn’t help.  “Keep going.” 

He nodded against her head and put her back in the water. 

She had no idea how long the process went on but by the fourth time he sprayed her eyes, she could make out other people in the room with them.  A few more treatments and she saw their worried faces clearly. 

“I can see.  I can see.” 

Hudson held a quietly sobbing Natalia and Harper’s fists were clenched at his sides. 
Hollow
stood in the doorway with his arms crossed and Tawny vibrated in fury beside him.

Then Elijah pulled her to his chest and cried brokenly against her neck.  She hugged him tightly as her stomach cramped and her head pounded painfully. 

“Thank you for keeping your head, Elijah.”  Her throat was raw from vomiting.  She brought his eyes up to hers.  “I love you.  Thank you for powering through it.  I know it was hard.” 

Harper held himself up by the vanity. 

“What else has to happen?” 

Wiping his face on his sleeve, Elijah said hoarsely, “We have to get you on an IV drip.  I need to pump a lot of fluid through your body.” 

“Can I wear dry clothes or at least take this off?  I’m freezing.” 

“As requested.”  Two of his team entered with bags.  “Mrs. Winters provided the sizes, sir.” 

Glancing past them to Natalia, Brie whispered scratchily, “Mrs.
Winters
.  Oh my god, I never get tired of that.” 

Stomping across the room, Harper lifted her from Elijah’s lap and held her soaking wet body against him.  “Everyone get out so we can get her in dry clothes.”  Closing his eyes, he added more calmly, “Please.  Please give us a minute.” 

When the door shut, Harper stripped her dress away with shaking hands.  She didn’t know where her shoes were. 

“Harper…?”

“We just…we have to fucking warm you up.  Let me focus.”  She heard fabric tear and placed her hands over his.  “Getting a fucking gown off shouldn’t be so goddamn
difficult
!”

“Harper.” 

“Stop being fucking understanding for a second so I can…” 

“Harper.  It wasn’t your fault.  I’m fine but even if I hadn’t been, it
still
wasn’t your fault.” 

“You could have been blinded.  Taken.  Killed.” 

“I wasn’t but you didn’t
do
anything, Harper.”  Wrapping her arms around him, strange shivers wracked her frame.  “Take a deep breath and help me undress.” 

He nodded and got her out of the gown.  As she bent over to strip the wet panties away, she vomited water. 

“That’s not embarrassing at all.” 

“Slow, Brie.  Slow.” 

Elijah finished undressing her while Harper rubbed her down with warm towels.  Wringing the water out of her hair as much as possible, they worked a soft t-shirt over her head, pulled stretchy pants up her legs, and sat her on the counter to put warm socks on her feet. 

She glanced at her reflection and gasped.  Her eyes were almost solid red and the skin around her eyes, nose, and mouth looked as if she’d burned to the point of blistering.

“I…will it heal?” 

“Yes.  Yes.  Don’t worry, Brie.”  Another bottle of water appeared and she took it.  “Ready?” 

She nodded and Harper took her off the counter and into the main room of the hotel suite. 

Throughout the night, they cycled several bags of fluids through her and carried her to the bathroom to vomit or pee. 

When the sun came up, she was sore all over and exhausted. 

She croaked, “I’m
pissed
my night of debauchery was cancelled.  Otherwise known as a day that ends in
y
.  I had so many lovely things planned.” 

Elijah gave a hesitant laugh and kissed the top of her head.  “Your debauchery has been rescheduled.  Rest.” 

Brie drifted off and smiled when she opened her eyes to Tawny crouching in front of her. 

“Hey, Red.  I hear you saved my life and shit.” 

“Shut the fuck up.  I just needed my drinking buddy.”  Her green eyes took in the skin of her face.  “You look
fucked
up.” 

“How’s the person who sprayed me?” 

“Breathing through a tube.  Ask me if I feel bad about it?  You don’t have to ask.  I don’t.”  Tawny picked up her hand.  “Let them get you behind walls for now.  Don’t fight them even though you’ll hate it sometimes.” 

“We’re going to Washington?”  She looked at Harper and he nodded.  With a heavy sigh, she murmured, “I wish I was more like you.  More like Elijah.” 

“No you don’t, Brie.  Don’t ever wish that.”  The redhead leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her hair.  “If people like you and Riya weren’t around, people like us would suffocate and eventually die.” 

“I don’t know anything.  I can’t even help.  I’m also like a newborn calf stumbling around, loving everybody, and making friends.”  She swallowed hard.  “What would have happened if you hadn’t gotten to me so fast?” 

“I did so we’re not going to fucking discuss it.”  She gave her a smile.  “Hang out, sketch, get your fucked up skin under control…” 

“Thanks for that, really.” 

“No worries.  I’m here to boost esteem.”  Tawny stroked her fingers over her hair.  “I’m sorry, Brie.”  Then she left the room.

A minute later, Elijah placed her in Harper’s lap and kissed her gently before following Tawny out into the hall.  Glancing up, she met silver eyes that stared at her with true pain. 

“Harper…is everything okay?” 

“No.  It isn’t but it will be.”  He held her close and she felt him shaking.  “I’m sorry.  I’m so sorry, Gabriella.” 

She hugged him.  “Listen.  I love you, I love Elijah, and I love the life we’re slowly building together.”  Leaning back, she looked into his eyes.  “Every risk, every threat, is worth it to be able to touch you, to talk to you, to share my love with you.” 

He kissed her carefully.  “You are magnificent.” 

“So are you.  In every way.”  Sighing, she added, “I have to pee again.  Damn it.” 

* * *

Hollow hugged Tawny tight enough to hurt.  “So fucking glad you noticed the girlfriend missing.  Goddamn grateful you diluted it before the acid in the compound had time to work.” 

Then she was crying against his chest and he knew how deeply she felt things wasn’t something most people would ever know about this woman.