Read My Lips (24 page)

I’m grateful to the internet and my vagina is, too. I read about menstrual cups online and there are some great communities dedicated to them where women can ask questions, get advice, and share their experiences. The Diva Cup has changed my period from something I hate, dread, and fear into something I can handle and feel prepared for. It would have been scary to start using one on my own and I might not have. It’s led to a better relationship with my vagina. And it really sucks that I can talk to hundreds of women online about it but only a few face to face.

—
B
ECCA,
30, Illinois

In a study designed to investigate women’s attitudes about these products, several gynecologists surveyed the patients in their clinic regarding their thoughts and opinions after reading a brochure for the product.
³
A total of sixty-nine patients completed the survey, of which 52 percent (thirty-six women) said that they would consider using the cup. The women found the cup appealing because it was better for the environment, required less-frequent changes, and eliminated the need to buy or carry supplies. In contrast, some women voiced concerns that the product would be messy, and others were uncomfortable about the fact that it required the use of one’s hands to insert and remove. Nevertheless, it is important to keep in mind that these responses were from women who had never used the product. The reactions may have been quite different after the women had an opportunity to try menstrual cups for themselves. Have you given the product a try? Want to share your experiences? Let us and other readers know about your experience on our blog (
www.readmylipsbook.tumblr.com
) or Facebook page.

Menstrual sponges appear to be less popular than menstrual cups (at least they seem less widely available for sale on the Internet), but women have been using natural sponges for menstrual flow for ages. The key is that natural sponges are used—we’re not talking about inserting kitchen-sink sponges inside your vagina, which would be unsanitary and potentially dangerous to the vagina and reproductive organs. Rather, sea sponges seem to be the sponge of choice when it comes to period flow. Of course, sponges are, well, spongy. Some women we’ve talked to have experienced period blood leakage when using menstrual sponges. Also, they need to be cleaned and preferably sterilized—such as in boiling water—after use, which can take time and is not always convenient (like if you’re wanting to change your sponge while at work or school, or in a public restroom). Also, sea sponges commonly degrade over time and likely need to be replaced every few months if not more often.

PROMOTING PERIOD PRODUCTS

In 2010, Kotex won over a lot of fans—women and men alike—by making fun of typical feminine-product advertisements that depict periods as times for dancing, long walks on the beach, hearts, and rainbows (without actually ever showing a vulva diagram or even an actual tampon). Their slogan was, “Why are tampon ads so ridiculous?”

Well, they were not the first ones to ask this question. There are at least two analyses of tampon ads that were conducted to assess exactly what messages women receive from these types of advertisements. The first analysis from Dr. Debra Merskin
⁴
used feminine-hygiene advertisements from ten years’ worth of teen magazines. She found that the majority of advertisements did not include a picture of a woman, and when they did, the woman was stationary (as opposed to engaging in an athletic or scientific activity). Most of the advertisements emphasized the comfort, ease, and bulkiness (or lack thereof) of the product. The advertisements addressed feelings of fear, secrecy, and freedom associated with menstruation/menstrual products.

In a later study, Drs. Simes and Berg
⁵
conducted an analysis of the content from two hundred women’s magazines. They identified several themes throughout the articles, including silence and shame, embarrassment, ways to get caught (smelling like your period), ways to avoid getting caught (smelling fresh), and being constantly “dirty” while menstruating. Although the themes identified by both researchers were similar, one suggested that the ads were designed to dispel these negative perceptions, whereas the other suggested that these advertisements promoted women’s negative feelings about their periods and their bodies. What do you think?

Menstrual cups and sponges can be safe and “greener” alternatives to tampons and pads. However, because they are used over and over again in the vagina, they must be properly sanitized in between uses. Read the package insert that comes with your product for the most accurate and up-to-date directions regarding cleaning and sanitizing your cup or sponge. Some cups and sponges can be sanitized by boiling them in water for five to ten minutes and then left to air dry. Generally speaking, it is not recommended to use soapy products that may leave a residue on the cup or sponge, as the residue may irritate the vagina. Other cleaning agents that are generally NOT recommended for cup or sponge cleaning include tea tree oil, bleach, vinegar, peppermint castile soap, oil-based soaps, rubbing alcohol, hand sanitizer, dishwashing fluids, or soaps. Some of these may irritate the vagina, and some of them may compromise the integrity of silicone menstrual cups. Again: when in doubt, check your package insert or check with your healthcare provider for recommendations about cleaning agents or products that may be more likely to irritate the vagina so that you can avoid them.

THE SCENT OF A WOMAN

Recently, Always came out with a line of pads that included individually wrapped wipes for use between pads. As women, we have heard the message a million times before: your menstrual blood is dirty and needs to be covered up, and your vagina needs to be cleaned. It is an upsetting message given how natural menstrual blood is. Of course, we understand that people can get a little squeamish around blood, so we sympathize if menstrual blood brings about some of these feelings for the blood-phobic.

These handy little wipes do not only play sidekick to menstrual products. Advertisements encourage women to use an array of different products to get that “fresh feeling,” including wipes, foams, and sprays. On the go? No problem! These products come in single-serving packages to take on the town with you in case you find yourself in a situation where you need your genitals to smell like fruit.

Okay, okay. We know a lot of people critique these products for making women feel bad about their genital smell. Rightfully so. We hate that women feel the need to conceal the natural scent of their genitals with the same scents that we would find in an air freshener. Still, if you are one of the women who use these products, we want you to know that we understand. With all these messages out there, it can be difficult not to feel self-conscious about one’s genital odor.

VULVA IN A BOTTLE

Do you wish that your vulva smelled more like roses and less like a vulva? Perhaps this is because so many companies have pushed women to consider using flower-scented products to cover their natural feminine odor. However, what would you say if we told you there is a company that sells a product (of oil/lubricant consistency) that smells like a vulva? In fact, it’s called Vulva. This is not a back-alley pervert product, either; it is marketed as classy and exotic, and selling for approximately 25 euros for two milliliters, it is also kind of pricey. Bottom line? The next time you are feeling self-conscious about your vulva smell, try to remember that some people would pay for just a sniff!

With so many of these products out there, do you ever wonder how many women are actually supporting this multi-million-dollar industry? Wonder no more! In Dr. Czerwinski’s survey, she also asked about the use of other “feminine” products.
¹
She found that older groups of women were actually more likely to use products than the younger women in the study. In the study, over 20 percent of women in the fifty-seven-and-up age group used feminine deodorant sprays and 40 percent used wet wipes. This is compared to only 8 percent of women in the under-forty-one age group who reported using feminine deodorant sprays and 26 percent who reported the use of wet wipes. In another study conducted several years later by our colleagues at the Indiana School of Medicine, Drs. Ott, Ofner, and Fortenberry found that these rates were actually much higher in the younger populations they studied.
⁶
They found that in a group of fourteen to eighteen-year-old women, 29 percent reported using feminine sprays and 27 percent reported using feminine wipes. Although they did not find that women who reported recent use were more likely to be diagnosed with an STI, they did find that the young women who reported an STI in their past were 1.7 times more likely to use feminine wipes. So, it remains unclear from this study whether product use was the cause or the effect.

That said, using these products may make it more difficult to diagnose a vaginal health problem. After all, some vaginal infections have a characteristic odor to them (such as a fishy odor) that can clue a doctor or nurse into what may be causing a woman’s symptoms. If a woman covers up her vaginal odor with scented feminine-hygiene products, it may make it more difficult for her healthcare provider to realize that there’s a problem or a possible infection that needs to be treated.

As such, whether you use feminine-hygiene products or not, consider steering clear of them before you go to the gynecologist. We know that they are tempting if you want to smell super special for your gynecologist, but remember that he/she is only concerned about your health and can miss something if you have recently used one of these products. If you use feminine-hygiene products at all, be sure to tell your gynecologist so that he/she can stay informed. The more he/she knows about the things you do with your vagina and vulva, the better his/her help and advice will be.

We are not here to tell you what to do or make you feel bad about your choices. What we do want to do is give you all the information that you need to make an informed choice.

DOUCHE OR DON’T?

When Vanessa was in fourth grade, her babysitter broke the news to her: it was time to start douching. A little unusual? Although it does seem outside of the typical realm of babysitting duties, many women receive similar recommendations from the women in their lives. One study found that most women who douched learned about it from their mothers (45 percent), other female relatives (11.1 percent), friends (15.7 percent), or advertisements (11.7 percent).
⁷
Whether by commercial, magazine advertisements, family members, or (in Vanessa’s case) babysitters, the fact is that many women learn from someone or somewhere that they are not naturally “clean” down there, and douching is recommended as the solution. It’s too bad that these messages of vaginas being “dirty” or needing “cleaning” continue to be shared with women.

I wish women didn’t feel so ashamed about the smell of their vaginas. So many of my friends tell me that they can’t enjoy oral sex because they are always paranoid that they smell or taste badly or that they feel pressured to cum.

—
J
ACQUIE,
28, Canada

Although people can douche in more ways than one, douches often look like a bag with a tube and nozzle attached. In order to douche, women typically fill the bag with water and insert the nozzle into their vaginas. Lift the bag up and—voila!—you have a steady douche. Some women use water, while others use marketed products, and a little over 5 percent of women use “home remedies.”
⁷
Some of these self-made concoctions have included Lysol, hydrogen peroxide, tea tree oil, vinegar, yogurt, and Coca-Cola (yes, Coke)—none of which are recommended as they could cause vaginal irritation or other health problems.

Who Douches?

How many women do you think douche regularly? Take a guess. According to some of the latest national data (meaning that it includes people of various backgrounds, ages, geographic locations, etc.), just over 25 percent of women douche regularly,
⁸
down 10 percent from a decade earlier. These are averages and vary based on age and race, with about twice as many women in their twenties and thirties reporting douching than younger women. This may be because younger women are less interested in douching, have not started douching yet, or maybe even are not able to douche regularly if they are worried that a disapproving parent could catch them in the act. Most women who reported douching did it once or twice a month.
⁷

Why Douche?

Every woman who douches probably has her reasons, but the most popular ones are to clean-up after periods or before/after sex, general hygiene, odor control, or just because it is what they think women do.
⁷

On one hand, without any information, it seems to make sense. Without washing, the rest of our body can get pretty stinky. We even wash out our mouth and clean our ears. Why would our vagina be any different? Well, we’ll tell you why. The vagina is a pretty magical place. It prepares itself for both sex and childbirth. In fact, one of its simplest tricks is its ability to keep itself clean (one of the few things that pussycats and pussy actually have in common).

Okay, so the vagina cleans itself. But the cleaner the better, right? Actually, no. The process of douching may remove normal vaginal flora (bacteria). If it seems that bacteria are something you normally want to get rid of, think again, as some bacteria are “good” in that they help to keep our bodies healthy. And anyway, your vagina is not a dirty kitchen counter. It is more like a wild flower; it is built to regulate itself and shouldn’t be overwatered (and definitely not treated with Lysol or other kitchen disinfectants).