Real Vampires Don't Wear Size Six (6 page)

BOOK: Real Vampires Don't Wear Size Six
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“Not the asshole who drove me to the middle of nowhere and dumped me so a vampire could ruin my life?” Penny’s voice rose and I looked around, afraid the guys in the nearby house would hear us. Luckily they were into loud music and a game that required a chant that drowned out Penny’s whine.
“Just look at this guy and listen.” I aimed her at Josh and we both tuned in to his mental ramblings.
“Beer pong. Cole’s turn. Need to give up beer. Look what happened at Ugly Chick party. Hated it. Got drunk and took girl to Mount Bonnell. Drove down the hill. Supposed to leave her. Rules of the party. Couldn’t do it. Not to any girl and she was nice. Liked her. Damn, I was sloshed. Got lost, couldn’t find way back up. Lost her. Tried to call, tell her, but no cell signal. Finally got up there, but she was gone. Guess she got signal, ride home. Must have better cell provider. Need new phone. Droid.”
Josh sighed and the chanting stopped for a moment. Then a new one started.
“Bucky. He’ll win. Next year I’m prez. Stop Ugly Chick thing. Makes frat look bad. Never shoulda left that girl. Bet she freaked. Gotta quit beer pong. Makes me hurl and act stupid. May hurl again. Damn beer.”
Penny turned to me. “He went back to look for me.”
“Seems like maybe Josh is basically a nice guy when not under the influence. Might even have boyfriend potential if he wasn’t a mortal.” I let her go but kept a close eye on her. There was still the bloodlust problem and we both had our fangs down.
“He
is
cute and smart. He’s a junior engineering major and makes the dean’s list.” Penny dragged her eyes from his bleeding lip down his body. “Does that mean my days of having a human boyfriend are gone forever, Glory?” She looked at me, her eyes filled with tears.
“Afraid so, hon. The only use you’ve got for mortals now is for feeding. And, personally, I don’t think that’s fair to them. That’s why I stick to the synthetics.” I glanced at him. He had a great blood type but was soaked in beer. Even if I was starving, which I wasn’t, I wouldn’t go for him.
“Guess you wouldn’t want to let me use him as a guinea pig then.” She approached him, ran a finger through the blood on this lip and tasted it. “Pretty delicious, even with the beer aftertaste.”
I sighed. Maybe Josh here owed her a meal, but I wasn’t going to let it happen. Just then a group of frat boys emerged from the house.
“Hey, Josh’s car is here, but I don’t see him. Wonder what happened?” There was a bit of discussion as to whether he’d been drunk enough to wander away and fall asleep somewhere and I could see a search party forming.
I grabbed him and looked him in the eyes. “Josh, go back to your car, tell your buds you got sick, hit the tree and scraped your face. Now you need a ride home from someone who isn’t drunk. You won’t remember seeing us.” I was about to shove him toward the parking lot when Penny grabbed him and took a turn with the eye thing.
“Tomorrow night you’ll call that girl Penny and apologize for the Ugly Chick fiasco. You think she’s cute and smart and you’ll ask her out. Now go!” She aimed him so he wouldn’t hit the tree and gave him a push with her boot on his backside. Then she followed me as we ran down the street toward my car.
“A date? You’re not going.” I glared at her when we were safely away from the house. We could hear the guys exclaiming over Josh’s reappearance from down the block.
“Why not? If this whammy thing works and he’s really going to do what we told him. Which I doubt.” Penny flipped her hair back over her shoulders in a gesture that I bet her sister had taught her.
“Oh, it’ll work all right. Vamps have the power to plant suggestions with mortals. I assume he has your number.” I stopped next to my convertible and unlocked it with a click of the remote.
“Yes, so why not let him be my practice mortal?” Penny climbed into the passenger seat. “So I won’t go nuts when I finally get to see Jenny.”
“You can practice a thousand times and I still won’t let you tell your sister about our world. Not till I know more about her and whether she can be trusted to keep our secret.” I sighed and got in the car. “We stay off the grid, Penny. Besides, it’s too soon for you to go testing yourself. When he calls, you can turn him down. Call him an unfeeling bastard for dumping you up there. It’s what he’ll expect.”
“No way. He’s the perfect candidate to test whether I can be with a mortal without draining him dry.” She grabbed my arm as I started the car. “Of course you’ll have to go along as chaperone.”
“You’re kidding, right?” I gave her a look and Penny let me go to fasten her seat belt. Chaperone. Nothing like making me feel every one of my advanced years.
“I’m going to see my sister eventually, Glory. So I guess I have to prove to you that I can be around mortals without endangering them. Better to practice on Josh than on Jenny, don’t you think?” She lifted her chin as I headed toward Sixth Street.
Brainy brat. “I suppose. But sounds like you’re trying to call the shots.
I
decide when things happen in this mentoring business, not the other way around.” I stopped at a light and gave her a serious look. “You don’t have a clue what you’re getting into.”
“I’m not a kid.” Penny crossed her arms over her chest.
“To me you are. In vampire years you’re an infant.” I grinned as I drove down the street with the top down on my red convertible, happy that I’d gotten in the last word. It was a really snazzy car for a poor shop owner and I loved it. I’d gotten it after working on a video for a billionaire and the Energy Vampires, a group of local vampire gangsters who I had owed a favor. The EVs weren’t to be trusted, but I’d
needed
the car and for once the creeps had kept their end of a deal.
It was a Monday night and my shop was closed but Rafe’s club was open. N-V was doing well and Monday was a night with a DJ. Teens could get in but not drink alcohol, of course. I decided to stop and see if Jerry had been right. If Rafe and I did have more going than friendship. And I could introduce Penny to him. It wouldn’t hurt to have help keeping an eye on her. We’d be around lots of mortals in the club and Penny could show me if she had a handle on her self-control. I found a parking place along the busy street, even though it was after one in the morning.
“You ever been in the new club N-V, Penny?” I smiled at her as I turned off the engine.
“No. You mean we’re going in there? I don’t exactly look right for the place.” Penny frowned down at her clothes. “When I woke up a vampire, I decided maybe I should go Goth but haven’t had time to shop. Damian had someone go to my apartment and grab this stuff. I may be fashion challenged, but I’ve been around Jenny enough to realize I’m not exactly rocking this look.”
I grinned, loving this opportunity. “Well, then. Lucky for you, my shop is just down the street. And
real
vampires try to avoid looking like a stereotype. We let the fakes have the Goth look. If we hurry, we can get you fixed up and still get in before the club closes. I want you to meet one of my best friends. He’s the owner of N-V.”
“Your shop. Vintage Vamp’s?” Penny climbed out of the car and looked around. “Let’s go. I love old clothes.”
Like I couldn’t have figured that out. But Penny would soon learn that my taste was less Salvation Army and more upscale retro. I unlocked my front door, punched in my alarm code and turned on the lights. Penny hurried to the black clothes; I hurried to the warm autumn colors. If I had to whammy her to prevail, I would. This girl was not going to be the poster child for bad vampire stereotypes.
“Go wash your face and brush your hair first while I pick out something for you to try on.” I pushed her to the back room. “Bathroom’s in there. I’m taking you to my hairdresser as soon as I can get you an appointment. Who’s been cutting your hair?”
“I cut my own.” Penny frowned. “You want me to wash off my makeup?”
“You have beautiful skin. You don’t need base or powder. And black lipstick is horrible on fangs. I have some mascara and a nice coral lipstick in my purse. That’s all you need.” I grabbed a green silk blouse and black pants in a size I figured would fit her and took them into the back. Shoes. The combat boots she had on were not made for dancing unless on someone’s grave.
“Green? I like green. And I thought you wanted me out of black.” Penny snatched the clothes and pulled off her old ones to reveal the saddest bra and panties I’d ever seen. We definitely needed a trip to Wally World for some better ones. But not tonight.
“Black pants are a staple. Those should fit. Try them.” I darted back into the shop and grabbed some black flats. “The boots have to go. See if these work. Unless you can wear heels.”
“No, I fall down. Flats are fine. How are you getting the sizes right?” Penny’s skin and hair had come alive as soon as she put on the green. And the black pants fit as if tailored just for her.
“I’m in retail and have waited on a lot of women. I can guess pretty accurately.” I grinned. “And you forgot to block your thoughts. You should hear them, very chaotic. Don’t be so uptight about shopping. A size is just a number. So what if you buy a sixteen one day and a fourteen another? Some brands run large, others run small.”
“Yeah, and I’m this size now, forever.” Penny sighed. “Guess I’ll just have to deal.”
“Yes, you will. Ready?” I put my arm through hers. “You can’t see yourself, but you look fabulous. Josh would so not take you to that awful party looking like this.”
“Thanks, Glory.” Penny hugged me. “Let’s go. I’ve been dying to get into N-V but didn’t think I’d get past the doorman.”
“Well, now you will. Even if you’re under twenty-one, you can whammy a mortal doorman. And if a paranormal is at the door, you just walk on up and they’ll know you’re a vamp by smell. Since Rafe and Nadia own the club, we’re always welcome. Nadia is a vampire and Rafael Valdez is a shape-shifter.” I added a gold jacket to my outfit to tone down the slut factor.
“Shape-shifter?” Penny waited as I punched in the security code and locked the shop door behind us. “You mean they’re real too?”
“Oh, yes. Weres too. Rafe can change into any form he wishes. So can you when you get the hang of things.” I started down the sidewalk. “I didn’t like to shift at first.” I laughed. “Well, for the first four hundred years actually. But it’s such a great defensive tool I had to get over it. Now I can do it when I have to. It does take a lot of energy. We’ll work on it.”
“How totally cool. I can’t see why anyone wouldn’t want to be a vampire.” Penny paused as we got to the block where the red neon proclaimed we’d arrived at N-V.
“Don’t kid yourself, Penny.” I gripped her hand. “Just a couple of hours ago you were crying about those morning coffees with your sister. And now you’ll never give your parents grandchildren, will you?”
“Geez, Glory, rain on my parade, why don’t you? I was trying to make the best of it.” Penny jerked her hand from mine. “Let’s go. It’s late and I want to see the inside of this place.”
“Fine. But also remember this is a test. You’ll be surrounded by mortals. Let’s see you rock that self-control you’re so sure you have.” I stalked up to the door, then smiled at the shifter standing there. “Hi, Trey, Rafe working tonight?”
“Sure is. Come on in.” He sniffed. “Your friend here should probably show some ID but I’ll stamp her hand since she’s obviously not going to be drinking alcohol anyway.” He reached out. “Hi, pretty lady. I’m Trey.”
Penny flushed and let him take her hand. “Penny. I’m new at this. Can you really tell what I am from my, um, smell?”
“You bet.” Trey grinned. “You want some lessons in how to tell the difference? I’d be glad to tutor you. I’m off on Wednesday nights. Call me.” He pulled a card from his jeans pocket and handed it to her.
“Thanks.” She tucked it into the black clutch I’d found for her.
“Anytime.” With a wink he glanced into the club. “Oops, here comes the boss man. Talk about sense of smell. When Glory is in the vicinity, he knows instantly. Right, Glory?”
I patted Trey on the shoulder, really happy with him for making a pass at Penny. She was positively glowing from the attention. And Trey was a hot guy. It had certainly taken her mind off the whole vamp issue and the mortals crowding around her. Her fangs were nowhere in sight.
Still, I’d keep a close eye on her while we were here. I wasn’t sure I’d been wise bringing her to a place with so many temptations. But I had made her down an extra bottle of synthetic from my back room fridge before we’d left the shop. Hopefully that would help her stay under control.
“Yes, you’re right. Penny, Rafe was my bodyguard for five years. He’s pretty well programmed to sense me from blocks away. Guess it’s a hard habit to break.”
“Impossible to break.” Rafe snagged me around the waist and gave me a squeeze. “Good to see you here. Who’s this?” He smiled at Penny.
“Penny Patterson. I’m mentoring her for the council. To make up for the recent debacle with the red eyes.” I gave Rafe a nudge. He was part demon himself and could make his own eyes red when things got dicey. “But I’m happy to help out a fledgling.”
“Hi. You must be the former bodyguard.” Penny was gazing around the club as we moved inside. It was pretty spectacular with deep purple walls, those red neon N-Vs and lots of chrome and strobe lights, along with loud music and a throbbing beat. The place was packed.
“That’s me, Rafael Valdez, at your service.” He shook her hand. “I mean it. You need anything. Can’t find Glory and need help, come here. If I can’t help you, someone else here will. I’ll pass the word. Paranormals stick together.” He said this quietly and there were no mortals near enough to hear him over the music.
“Place seems to be doing well.” I was very conscious of Rafe’s arm still around my waist. I should move away. Put space between us. The fact that I hadn’t rebuffed him from the get-go bothered me. Maybe Jerry had been wise to give me space. I needed to get my Rafe attraction settled once and for all.

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