Rebecca Hagan Lee - [Borrowed Brides 01] (31 page)

Faith studied the baby. Tempy hadn’t exaggerated. She
was
beautiful with her crown of ebony hair and tiny features. “She has blue eyes.”

“Black Irish,” Kevin announced proudly. “Just like her grandpa.”

“All babies have blue eyes.” Temperance reminded the proud grandfather.

“I always pictured them as being brown.” Faith told them. “Chocolate-brown, like her father’s.” She looked up at Tempy.

“Perhaps they’ll turn brown as she gets older,” Temperance attempted to reassure her daughter.

“But then I won’t be here to see it,” Faith whispered softly, tears clouding her vision. “Where’s Reese?”

“I’m here,” Reese said from his position near the fireplace away. He walked to the bed and sat down, balancing himself on the edge.

Faith held the baby out to him. “Come meet your daughter.” She thrust the baby into his arms. “She belongs to you.”

Reese opened his mouth, tried to stop her, but Faith wouldn’t let him. “I hope you’re not going to be disappointed because she’s a girl. I know you wanted a son, but she can still be your heir. David will know how to draw up a suitable contract.” The baby wriggled in his arms and Reese tried to hand her back to Faith.

“Take her, Faith,” he pleaded.

“I can’t.” Faith smiled at Reese through her tears. “It hurts too much. You’ll have to learn how to cope with her, Reese. She’s yours now. I’ve delivered her to you.” She turned away from them both.

“Faith…” Reese began.

She shook her head.

Temperance stepped forward and took the baby from Reese. “She’s tired, Reese. Let her rest. You can talk later.”

“But I lo…” He tried his best to say them, but the words stuck in his throat.

“Let her sleep.” Sarah spoke to him in Cherokee. “You can tell her what you feel tomorrow.”

“Are you sure you won’t change your mind?” Tempy asked, watching as Faith packed her trunk.

“You didn’t change yours.” Faith turned to look at Tempy. Her mother. She hadn’t meant to say that but after six weeks, she was still coming to terms with the fact that Temperance had given her into her sister Prudence’s care.

“I’ve tried to explain I didn’t have a choice,” Tempy repeated. “You had to be raised as Prudence and Edward’s natural daughter. That was the price they charged for taking you in. I accepted those terms so I could be near you. I couldn’t tell you. I couldn’t risk having them turn you out. Please, try to understand, Faith.”

“I understand why you couldn’t tell me the truth in the beginning,” Faith said. “But after they died…” Faith folded another dress and placed it in the trunk. “Everyone else knew, didn’t they? Aunt Virt, Hannah, and Agnes? You could have told
me
.”

“Yes, they knew. We all grew up together. They were aware of my so-called disgrace. I wanted to tell you after Prudence died. I ached to tell you. But I was afraid. Afraid to risk the relationship we shared.” Tears sparkled in Tempy’s gray eyes. “After nearly twenty years of living a lie, how could I tell my niece that she was really my daughter? How could I expect you to understand why I stood by and allowed someone else to raise my daughter as their own?”

“But I do understand,” Faith said.

“Now you understand,” Tempy told her. “Because you’re about to make the same mistake I made. You’re about to leave your daughter the way I left you.”

“You never left me!” Faith said fiercely. “You always loved me. You were always there when I needed you.” Faith folded another dress and placed it in the trunk.

“I’m still here.” Tempy reminded her hardheaded Black Irish daughter. “And your father as well.”

“And here is where you’ll stay. David is going back to Richmond. He hasn’t said anything, but I’m sure it’s to start the divorce proceedings.”

“Has Reese said anything?”

“No.”

“Then you don’t really know why David’s going back.”

Faith looked up from her chore and met her mother’s worried frown. “The point is he’s going for some reason. It has to be because of the divorce. I’m going with him. Joy and I.”

“Your father and I will go with you.”

“Aunt…Mother, you’re pregnant. You shouldn’t be traveling across the country. You must stay in Wyoming. Reese might need help with the baby.”

“The baby, the baby!” Temperance exploded. “Won’t you at least give your daughter a name before you leave?”

“That’s for Reese to do.”

“I named you,” Tempy confided. “I named you and I made Prudence promise to keep the name. Your daughter should have something you’ve given her. What better gift than her name?”

“Her father.” Faith was openly crying. “She’ll have her father. I’m giving her Reese. Don’t you see? He needs someone to love. Someone of his own. Someone he can love without fear of rejection.”

“What about you?” Temperance demanded. “What about your needs?”

“I need to know they have each other,” Faith hugged her mother. “And I need to know you and Kevin are looking out for them.”

“I can’t promise you that,” Tempy said. “You’re my child, Faith. My flesh and blood. If you go to Richmond, I go with you.” Temperance stood firm. “I won’t give you up again. I can’t.”

“You have to, Mother,” Faith replied. “You have a family here. A home. A husband who dearly loves you. And in a few months you’ll have another child to love.”

“Not as much as I love you.” Tempy brushed away her tears.

“Every bit as much as you love me.” Faith smiled at her. “This is your home now. Not Richmond.”

“My home is where my family is,” Tempy said.

“Your family will be here.”

“Except you,” Tempy said. “
You
won’t be here.”

“I have to go,” Faith explained. “You know that. I signed a contract. I have a legal obligation. I must abide by the terms of the contract, just as you honored your agreement with Aunt Prudence.”

“I was sixteen. I was forced to submit to my father’s will. But Faith, this is different. I don’t believe Reese would fight you. I don’t think he would really try to keep you from seeing your baby. He won’t enforce the terms of the contract.” Temperance walked to her daughter and put her arms around her.

“What if he does?” Faith asked. “What will happen to Aunt Virt and the others if he does? I can’t risk the house in Richmond. It’s their home.”

“Oh, Faith, my brave, darling Faith! We can hire a lawyer to break the contract.”

“And drag Reese’s good name through the mud? And mine as well? No, Mother.” Faith closed the trunk, then sat on top of it. “I love Reese. I love him enough to abide by his conditions. To give him whatever he wants.” She looked Temperance in the eye. “Reese Jordan wants his child. And he wants me out of his life.”

“I think you’re wrong, Faith.”

“Not this time,” Faith said sadly. “If he’d ever mentioned wanting me to stay before the baby was born, I’d stay. But now… It’s too late. He never once mentioned love. He never suggested…”

* * *

Reese paced the confines of the nursery, his tiny little girl cradled against his shoulder. Her mother was leaving in the morning and he couldn’t bring himself to ask her to stay. He’d had every opportunity. He’d followed her around like a puppy dog for the last six weeks, hoping for a chance. And he missed it. He’d missed lots of them, he reminded himself. He’d had the past year to rip up the contract and ask Faith to stay with him.

So why hadn’t he?

“Because I’m afraid,” he whispered in his daughter’s ear. “I’m afraid she doesn’t love me.” He’d never dreamed he would turn out to be such a coward. He’d never been afraid to risk anything before, but he realized he’d never risked his heart.

“What if all she feels for me is desire?” He gently patted the infant’s back, burping her as the wet nurse had instructed him.

He didn’t think he could survive Faith’s rejection, but then again, how could he stand to lose her?

“I thought you’d make the difference.” He confided to the sleeping baby. “I thought I was so clever. I thought she’d beg me to let her stay once she found out about you. And then when she didn’t, I was sure everything would be fine once you got here. Faith would take one look at you and refuse to leave without you. Then I’d have had her. I could waive the contract and the marriage papers and forbid her to take you. And she’d stay. We would be a family—me, you, Joy, and your mother. I’d have everything I ever wanted,” Reese explained. “Without having to say the words. Without having to risk anything. It was such a clever plan. And I was such a fool. I should have known better.” He sat down in the large rocking chair and began to rock. “Your mother is a fine and honorable woman. And she’s determined to honor that damned contract whether I want her to or not.” He kissed the top of the baby’s head. She smelled faintly of lavender, like her mother. “That’s why I’m hiding out in the nursery with you,”

Reese continued talking to his infant daughter. “I know she’ll come to see you before she leaves. She loves you very much. And when she comes to see you, I’ll be able to talk to her. I’ll be able to give her the ring I meant to give her for her birthday. And I’ll be able to tell her something very important…I have to explain how I feel. It won’t be easy, but I hope she’ll understand how much…” His voice broke. He tried again. “I hope…” The words choked him.

Reese cuddled the baby closer, hiding his face against her tiny body, afraid she’d be frightened by the sight of his tears.

* * *

Faith found them asleep in the rocking chair. As she eased the baby out of Reese’s arms, she noticed the dampness on Reese’s cheeks. He had obviously comforted his daughter, soothed away her tears, by rocking her to sleep. Faith smiled at the thought. He would be a good father. His daughter would never lack for love.

Faith tiptoed to the cradle, half-hoping Reese would awaken.

There was so much she wanted to say, so much she wanted to tell him. But she couldn’t. She wanted to stay. She wanted him to ask her to stay. She wanted to beg him to let her stay. And love him, even if he couldn’t pretend. Even if he couldn’t return her love. She kissed the top of her daughter’s head as she tucked her into the cradle.

“I love you so much,” she whispered. “I love you both so much, but I can’t stay. I can’t ask him to marry me. He doesn’t love me. There was someone else. Someone named Gwendolyn, a long time ago. She hurt him badly, and now, he won’t allow himself to love anyone else. He’s afraid to trust.” Faith gently swung the wooden cradle back and forth. “Your daddy is afraid to love me. But he loves you very much. As much as I do. So you promise me you’ll take good care of him. Grow up and be happy. I wish I could be with you. I hope you’ll forgive me one day. And I hope…” Tears clogged her throat, making her words inaudible. “One day you’ll read this and understand how much I love you, how much I love your daddy.” She slipped the envelope into the cradle next to her daughter’s tiny fist.

Written in Faith’s clear, precise handwriting on the outside of the envelope was one word. A name.

Hope.

Faith kissed her daughter one last time, then on impulse lightly brushed Reese’s ebony hair with her lips.

She hurried out of the nursery, down the stairs, out the front door, and into the buggy. Tempy and Kevin would drive her to the railway station. She’d decided not to wait for David. She would be in Richmond when he got there, ready to learn the terms of the divorce.

The mail train to Omaha left the station at nine. And when it pulled out, Faith planned to be on it.

* * *

Reese discovered the note when he woke sometime after midnight. He felt no qualms about ripping it open and reading the contents.

She was gone. Reese sank back down into the rocking chair. He’d missed his golden opportunity. She’d come to the nursery, then left without waking him.

For the first time in his adult life, Reese couldn’t think what to do. Reese Jordan, the master strategist, the man with a proven plan for obtaining his goals, was lost. And all because Faith had left him.

Reese got up from the rocker and began to pace the confines of the nursery. He couldn’t believe his stupidity. He’d worked so hard to win her, then pushed her away. He’d pushed her away when what he wanted most of all was to have Faith share the rest of his life. Reese had to get her back. He had to think of something—some way, some plan—to keep her.

He crumpled Faith’s note in his fist, then tossed it into the fire. Hope wouldn’t need the letter. She’d grow up knowing
exactly
how her mother felt. He hurried out of the nursery and went racing down the hall.

* * *

“Get up!” Reese stood next to David’s bed. He reached down to shake his cousin’s shoulder once again.

“What time is it?” David struggled out from under the covers.

“Never mind that. Get dressed and get the buggy. I’m going to get Grandfather.”

David sat up on the side of the bed, reaching for his trousers. “Where are we going?” He pulled his pants into place.

“She’s gone,” Reese told him. “But I’m going to bring her back. We’re going to the telegraph office in Cheyenne.”

“Now?” David glanced at the clock.

“Can you think of a better time?” Reese countered. “She’s already got a head start.
Hurry!
” Reese slammed the bedroom door, the sound of his booted feet echoing through the hall as his shout ripped through the silent house. “And David, don’t forget to bring the baby—and the nurse!”

* * *

“I don’t want to go to Wichmond,” Joy protested irritably, shifting on the hard bench seat. “I want to go back. I don’t want to leave Brutus. Or, Sam. Or, Weese,” she repeated for what seemed like the thousandth time.

“Neither, do I, angel, but we have to,” Faith explained, her voice tight.

“Well, I don’t like it,” Joy said.

“It’s just for a visit,” Tempy promised. “If you don’t like it once we get there, you can come back with Uncle Kevin and me.”