Reckless Abandon (21 page)

Adrian takes his hand off the knob and walks toward me. “Look, Ember. I know that you were in love with him. I also know that he broke your trust. What I need from you is to know that you’re with me, one hundred percent. Here. And Here.” He points to my head and my chest, over my heart.

Instinctively I lunge forward and smash my lips into his, wrapping my arms around his neck and holding on tightly. Adrian’s hands press into my sides as he returns my kiss. I can’t find the words to explain to Adrian that I care about him; those words still seem assigned to someone else. People are in love with more than one person all the time—right? This is just one of those times. I need to continue on with Adrian, while begging Bo to fade to black in the memory of my heart. When we pull apart, Adrian smiles foolishly.

“I’ve got some things I have to get done in town before the party tonight. I’ll see you there, OK?”

“Absolutely.” I kiss his neck once before backing away.

Adrian leaves, but stops the door from closing behind him and peeks his head back in.

“I do love you, Blue.” He grins again and quickly shuts the door before I can respond, which I’m grateful for.

Chapter Twenty-Three

“It looks great out here, Ember, you did an awesome job!” Marley, one of the summer bartenders, admires the twinkle lights and flowers adorning Finnegan’s back deck.

I admit, the place looks amazing, a slice of heaven right on the beach. I can think of no two people who deserve this more than Monica and Josh—they’re the real deal.

“Thanks for your help, Marley,” I smile. “So where are you from?” I step down from the small ladder I’d been using to hang lights. Her black, bobbed hair nearly matches her eyes; her olive skin would lead me to believe she models full time.

“I’m from Framingham, but my family has a house here in Barnstable. I’m in law school, Columbia. When I graduated from BU, I immediately went to get my MBA without much thought—I hate it.” She giggles and tucks some hair behind her ear. “I worked in the corporate world for a couple of years before deciding to go get my law degree. I want to help struggling companies survive attempts at large takeovers.”

“That’s impressive. Do you mind if I ask why the hell you waste your time here in the summer?” I fold the ladder and tuck it behind the fence.

“I’ve been coming here since I was a kid. Now that I’m saving for an apartment in the city, I need as much extra cash as I can get. Have fun tonight, Josh and Monica are lucky to have a friend like you.” Marley walks back inside and easily picks up the slack at the bar, where I notice Adrian sitting.

I walk in and he turns to me with a smile.

“Hey you,” I lean in and kiss his cheek as I spot Rae, Bo, and Regan out of the corner of my eye. Bo’s back is to me and, admittedly, I’m thankful. “Where’s Pace?”

“An ex-girlfriend is in town.” Adrian’s mischievous grin is the only answer I need. “Damn, I can’t say this enough, you’re gorgeous.”

I playfully spin in the spaghetti-strapped, floor-length, flowing dress my mom bought me. Sometimes one must embrace their inner flower child. “Thank you. Finish your beer, I’m gonna go say “hi” to Rae and make sure Regan’s all set to go tonight for the song we wrote.” I give his shoulder a gentle squeeze. I hear him mumble, “Columbia, huh?” to Marley as I walk away.

I’m surprised Bo came, honestly. He said he would, but I thought he might bring Ainsley just for “fun.” She doesn’t seem to be anywhere around, so I smile and slide into the chair next to him.

“Hey guys, I’m glad you made it!”

“I told you I’d come.” Bo doesn’t turn in my direction, but I catch him swallowing hard when I turn in his. Rae and Regan stare anywhere else but between us.

“Well, I’m glad you did. Josh and Mon will be here soon, we should head out back.” I stand and the rest of them do the same. I see Bo catch a glimpse of Adrian, in deep conversation with Marley, and he stiffens for a moment before falling in stride behind me.

I tug on Adrian’s shirt as we walk by him. He shakes Marley’s hand and joins us outside, directly by my side. I swear everyone can see the lines of fire between Adrian and Bo, but I guess that’s just me—and Rae, who shoots me cautious gazes across the deck.

Josh and Monica arrive, along with more of our friends, and the party is a hit. Plenty of beer, liquor, and laughter flow through the crowd. Adrian rarely leaves my side; a point not unnoticed by Bo, who I catch staring at us more than once. I force a tight but polite smile every time our eyes meet. He doesn’t return them.

After an hour, Regan suggests we move the party inside, so we can play our surprise for Josh and Monica. We’ve spent as much time as we can composing a song for fiddle and guitar that expresses their love for each other, and the love that others see when they’re in a room with them. After each practice and performance, Regan and I would sneak to my place or his and work in it.

Everyone settles into their seats in front of the stage. Adrian always leans against the back wall when he watches me play, and I don’t know why. Either way, he’s standing back there, observing me and the crowd in one glance.

Regan seductively pulls his bow across the strings, and we begin the love song we’ve worked so hard on. My fingers are raw from playing all last night, but watching the looks of gratitude on my friends’ faces, it doesn’t matter. As hard as I try, I can’t stop blinking quick looks over to Bo, whose eyes never leave my hands. The drink in his hand shifts from beer to liquor, and a dark look shades his face. We finish amidst a hearty applause. Rae hops up on stage and hugs Regan, and I notice a small smile pull on Bo’s lips. Those two are really cute together.

“Great job,” Regan whispers to me when he kisses my cheek.

“Thank you. Thanks for the extra lessons, too.” I put my guitar in its case and lean it against the back wall.

“No problem. Take a break for a few days and let those babies heal, would ya?” He playfully grabs my fingers, making me wince.

“Rae and I are gonna get going, I’ll catch up with you later.”

“Have fun, guys. Thank you for coming.” I pull Rae into a hug. “Do you have to go, too?” I ask Bo as he approaches us. I fidget with the fabric of my dress.

“We drove separately because I knew they’d be leaving early. Is it OK if I stick around a while?”

“Sure. I’m going to get a drink. Drive safe, you two.”

Halfway to the bar, Adrian catches up with me.

“That was good, Blue. Real good.” He pushes my hair aside with his nose and kisses my neck.

“Thanks. I’ve been practicing.” I chuckle sarcastically in reference to our earlier argument.

“I’m sorry about earlier. I don’t mean to push you.”

“It’s fine. Things have been stressful the past few weeks. Now that the center’s open, I’ll have less time on the road, and I won’t be so crazy all the time.”

Monica sneaks up behind me. “Like hell. Your crazy-ass will find something to overwork yourself with.” She smacks my butt and muscles her way between Adrian and me before hugging me. “You’re skinny, what gives?” She pulls the strap of my dress and lets it smack against my shoulder blade.”

I shrug. “Stress, I guess.” I haven’t been this thin since finals my junior year.

Her eyes slowly study my bone structure before she rolls them. “This party is gorgeous, you’re an awesome friend. I can’t believe you went ahead with it despite what a bitch I’ve been to you lately.”

“Don’t mention it. You’re entitled to your opinion. I’m just gonna get a drink and head outside, meet me there.” I shoo tipsy Monica away before she reveals her total displeasure about us right in front of him.

The regular Saturday night crowd pours into Finnegan’s and, suddenly, cheers and hoots erupt as a gaggle of girls spot Bo sitting at a table near the bar. One of them, a regular, spots me and runs toward me.

“Is he playing tonight?” She squeals, pointing unabashedly at Bo.

I peer around Adrian’s shoulder and study the three empty glasses in front of Bo. “I don’t think so, he’s just here for Josh and Monica’s engagement party.”

“I’ll play,” Bo shouts from the table. “Can I borrow your guitar, Ember?”

“Uh...sure.” I can almost hear Adrian’s jaw clenching as I leave the bar.

I walk on stage and pull out my guitar before heading to the mic and announcing a special performance by Bo. The moderately packed bar goes wild for him as he slides onto the stool next to me. Silently, I’m busy hoping that he, and the crowd, doesn’t ask me to sing with him. I hurry back to the bar as he warms up for a few minutes.

“Let’s go outside,” Adrian whispers into my ear.

“Just a sec. I want to listen to him. Before you get all territorial, yesterday was the four-year anniversary of his parents’ death. The least I can do is sit through one song.”

“I’m gonna go get some air.” Adrian whips off the stool and charges through the back door.

Despite barely making eye contact with me all night, the second Bo starts singing a song of his that must be new, he locks eyes with mine through the now-crowded bar. My pulse matches the speed at which goosebumps spread across the surface of my skin. Three songs later, his eyes haven’t left mine, and I’ve lost track of time. He’s singing to me, I know he is—my body knows he is. Adrian’s fingers on my shoulder startle me.

“Shit, I didn’t hear you come up behind me.” I gulp my beer.

I engage Adrian in quiet conversation, my back turned to the stage. Suddenly, a familiar nineties tune echoes from the stage and pulls a lump to my throat.

“Pearl Jam...seriously?” I whisper as I turn around to find Bo looking directly at Adrian and me as he sings “Better Man.”

My jaw drops as I stare at the stage while Bo sings about people convincing themselves they’re in love with someone all wrong for them. I didn’t notice Josh and Monica reenter the bar, but they hear the song too.

“Oh, holy shit.” Monica shakes her head and tips back her beer with a mocking grin. Adrian’s fists are clenched. I hop down from the stool, pulling him outside.

“Don’t worry about him, Adrian. He’s had a shitload to drink.” I walk onto the beach, putting as much space between Adrian and the bar as possible.

“Fuck him, Ember. He sang that song deliberately to piss me off.”

“Like you’ve never tried crazy shit over me before. Recall orchestrating a work merger?” I roll my eyes and walk down the beach.

After a few minutes of strained silence, I can tell Adrian’s calming down. He’s holding my hand, and his breathing has returned to normal. We turn and take a few minutes to walk back to Finnegan’s. Once we get there, Josh, Monica, and a few of our other friends are outside drinking under the twinkle lights. Adrian heads inside for a beer and I pull Monica aside.

“Sorry for the almost-drama at your party.”

“It’s fine. That was some crazy shit.” She giggles behind her beer.

“Yeah. Crazy is right. Where is he now?” I try to peer inside, but see no sign of him.

“He left after that last song. He threw his keys at Josh and walked down the road. He’s probably headed for Lost Dog.”

“Oh, that’s just great. There’s no fucking way he can go home tonight. He was drunk before leaving here and now he’s headed
ther
e
?
”

I cut the rest of my thought off as Adrian returns with beers for both of us. I manage to push thoughts of Bo out of my mind for the next hour. We all enjoy the warm July breeze and tease Josh and Monica about perceived married life. None of us are married; they’re heading out into uncharted waters.

Adrian’s been distant since our argument this morning. I have, too. His accusations and assumptions hurt. I’d never cheat on anyone. That he questioned my character has weighed heavily on me all day. It’s weighed on him, too, according to the amount of beer I’ve seen him put away tonight. I stop drinking since it looks like I’ll be driving everyone home.

Two hours later, I’ve deposited Josh and Monica at her place and returned to get Adrian from Finnegan’s, when I receive a text from C.J.

C.J.: Bo’s here. Dude’s in bad shape—he needs to get home.

I growl and punch my steering wheel. I knew this would happen, and I’ve used the entire night trying to plan how to deal with it. I text Regan.

Me: Hey, are you guys in town or in Concord or what?

Regan: Concord, why? Everything OK?

Me: Not really...don’t say anything to Rae but Bo’s drunk and can’t drive home. I’ll figure it out. Seriously, don’t say anything to Rae.

Instantly, my phone rings. It’s Regan.

“Ember, what’s going on?” I can tell he’s gone outside by his breathlessness.

“Bo drank a lot tonight. I don’t know if he’s planning on driving home to Concord, but C.J. texted me and said Bo’s in rare form at Lost Dog right now. Adrian’s gonna be pissed.” I mumble the last part under my breath.

“Listen, I’ll tell you where my spare key is. Take Bo there, if you’d like. I actually just left Rae’s.” Regan dictates where I’ll find his spare key before we hang up, and I prepare to deal with Adrian by resting my head on the steering wheel.

After a few minutes I return to Finnegan’s, resolved that I have to take Bo back to my place. I can’t leave him alone in a stranger’s apartment—not in the state he’s in. Adrian is once again chatting up Marley at the bar. Ordinarily, his attention to her might irritate me, but right now I have other issues stalking my nerves.