Regius (4 page)

"It's like coming home in
the winter when it is cold outside. You step through the door and
you're hit by the warmth and safety the inside has to offer."
Vervaine murmured, answering my thought precisely. She smiled when
I looked surprised at her very accurate description. "It's mutual;
I feel the same when I'm next to you." Sitting up, I ruffled my
hair and smiled back at her through my morning yawn.

"I want to second guess
it." I admitted, stretching my back comfortably. "It's not natural
to feel so connected to someone you don't know at all." She pointed
her short blade at the mug of coffee she'd prepared for me before
returning the sharp edge to the wood.

"If it hadn't been for that
connection, I'd have never touched you glove free." She agreed. I
remember how surprised I'd been when she'd entered my personal
space so suddenly the day we'd met. But that was just it; it had
been surprise, not fear. "I don't understand why they are still
being so cautious about you." Vervaine murmured, a slight frown
appearing between her brows. "You can't see like I can." Sipping
the coffee, I nodded. It was true, I couldn't.

"What has them so sure I am
part Seer? Besides the fact that my father claimed me to be when he
handed me over to the Altors and that I have shown some
characteristics similar to you?"

Vervaine was different from
everyone else. She looked and acted like any other human at first
glance. However, when you spent enough time with her, you noticed
that she was inhumanly all-knowing. Just not cold like the
Regius.

"You have recurring
nightmares, displayed signs of delirium when the blue blood cell
kicked in and from what Datura has told me, every time something
bad happens, you get a warning feeling beforehand in the pit of
your stomach." Planting the blade into the grass, she tossed the
small carved block of wood in my direction. Catching it, I saw
she'd sculpted an eye. The symbol of the Seer. "I get that exact
same sensation right before I get a vision. While you can't see
like I can, you do display certain behavioral traits that only
appear in Seers."

"That is thin though." I
argued. "Recurring nightmares can happen to anyone, especially
those who've gone through something traumatic."

Vervaine shook her head.
"No, that is where you are wrong. Ask anyone who says they suffer
from the recurring nightmares to describe each nightmare every time
they have it. You'll notice distinct differences between each.
Whereas you, I am sure you always dream the same set of nightmares
that while they may be different from one another, aren't different
on their own. One scene will always unfold exactly as it did
prior." Unfortunately, she was right.

Since she seemed willing to
talk, I figured it couldn't hurt to ask her a question.

"Do you have certain
moments in your life you can't remember at all, no matter how hard
you try?" Maybe that wall in my mind could be explained through the
alleged Seer within me.

She shook her head, almost
making me feel upset that I was yet again the odd one, but then she
spoke. "You cannot remember certain parts of your life because
someone made sure you couldn't."

Clenching my hands, I felt
goose bumps break free as I tried to wrap my mind around the idea
of someone purposely stripping me of that right. She knew why and I
had to stop myself from screaming at her in anger because she
hadn't told me sooner. That wall was like nothing else in my life.
I could have been completely satisfied in Lithium Village if I
hadn't had that constant reminder of, ironically, not being able to
remember. I'd heard so often that it was normal for your childhood
to fade, that details became blurry and that everyone didn't
remember those years clearly. But my case was different. I didn't
even have a blurry memory. I couldn't even remember what my father
looked like.

"Who?" I gritted out,
trying to keep my anger in check. "Why would someone do
that?"

"You should feel upset."
Vervaine nodded at my current state. "They stripped you of things
that were personal to you, and while they did this partly to
protect you, it was also a lame attempt to anger my
mother."

"Sage."

She nodded. "What you
believe to have been your first encounter with Rhamnus, wasn't.
You've met before. It was a year before my father brought you to
the Lithium Village boarding house."

"The day I supposedly
entered my induced coma?" I asked.

"Indeed. You were hit by a
car when you tried to run from the tracker. He was after you
because Sage ordered it. I'm not quite sure what she wants with
you. She was once very determined to try and get me back, but when
she figured out that my father wasn't going to make that possible,
it's as though she needed to take her anger out on something to
make up for my loss. I'm very afraid she made you and Kalmia the
receiving end of her wrath."

"You're telling me that my
entire life was messed up because Sage threw a hissy fit?" If that
was true, then I would maybe have to stop believing that there was
good in everyone.

Vervaine sighed. "Let’s
walk while we talk, yes?" Feeling a flash of uncertainty wash over
me, I looked longingly back at the crack in the earth. "You'll
sense it when he returns to this realm. And if you don't, I
will."

Albeit a bit reluctant
still, the idea of stretching my legs wasn't a bad one. We both
stood and started to walk side by side through the meadows, miles
of green surrounding us. The sky was nearly the same shade as her
hair and although our subject of conversation was uncomfortable for
me, Vervaine seemed to enjoy the human connection I offered her.
Maybe it was that feeling of home Seers had around one another that
made it okay for her to speak with me so openly. I'd never seen her
so willing around any other people.

"I'd say you should just
blame Sage, but that isn't the entire truth and you know that,
Calycanthus." She murmured.

"Cali is fine."

"Thank you." She smiled at
me. "I'm telling you all of this even though the Elders
specifically ordered us not to reveal anything."

"Then why are you?" Linking
my hands behind my back, I decided to soak in the connection of
warmth, stabilizing my emotions through it, making all of these
revelations easier to absorb.

"They don't understand
what it's like. For a Seer
not
to know." I saw her wince, the pain engraved on
her face telling me that she knew
exactly
how I felt when it came to
the lack of memories. "While I choose not to use my gift so it
cannot consume my being, if I, like you, were to think back to a
certain moment in my life and run into a wall, blocking my
access..." She shuddered. "I don't know how you do it, Cali.
Although we have some Altor in us, we aren't entirely so. The Seer
is stronger than the blood of a soldier, it is dominant and I know
it is as present within you as it is in me, even if you can't
see."

"Thank you." I murmured,
filled with gratitude for her being willing to soothe an ache of
mine.

"It's part of us. When we
don't understand, we will ask questions until we do." She said. "We
can be patient, but we expect an answer at one point or another.
But, like in every situation, patience does run out."

"And mine-"

She cut me off by placing
her gloved hand on my shoulder. "Ran out long ago." She finished
for me, nodding in understanding. "I can feel your
frustration."

"You read people well." I
mumbled.

"You could too; you just
have to allow yourself. You don't need foresight to tap into the
Seer side that allows you to pick up on how people around you feel
and guess accurately what they are thinking." She squeezed my
shoulder tightly then. "Don't shy away." Her voice was firm all of
a sudden, instructing me not to back away from what she was
allowing me to sense off of her. Tapping into her wasn't as hard as
I thought it would be once I'd received her permission. Although I
was probably untrained in this skill I could apparently use, it's
not like I'd never tried to read people and obtain an accurate
guess. I always wrote it off as being particularly good at reading
body language, and maybe that was part of it.

Focusing on Vervaine, my
brows knitted together as I concentrated on her hand, my eyes
closing when I pictured her in my mind. I felt heavier all of a
sudden, as though I was carrying something with a lot of weight. My
perception of the world surrounding me shifted, it moved slower
than I normally would look at things. But all of those sensations
were nearly lost when an overwhelming amount of loneliness washed
over me, nearly powerful enough to knock me right off my
feet.

My mouth parted, a choke
escaping my throat as I couldn't stop myself from tugging Vervaine
closer, wrapping my arms around her and holding her close. She
stiffened; her entire demeanor cautious and afraid as I guided her
head to my shoulder to make sure my cheek wouldn't connect with
hers.

"What are you doing?" She
whispered shakily.

"I'm hugging you." I rubbed
my hand between her shoulder blades, still severely upset with how
much loneliness I'd tapped out of her. I breathed out when I felt
her arms come around my waist, her movements shy as she returned
the hug.

"Everyone is always so
careful."

"Because you have people
believe they should be." I explained. "They are afraid that coming
near will harm you. But it doesn't, does it? Only if skin touches
does a vision trigger. They don't need to be as careful as they
are."

She let out a short
chuckle, her hands fisting into the shirt on my back. "But if I
allowed it, then it would be like a constant tease of what I can
never have. Removing myself completely makes it easier for me to
pretend that my life is normal." She pulled away slowly, giving me
a pained smile. "Do you remember your first encounter with
Datura?"

Although I did a double
take at the sudden subject change, I didn't guide her back to her
issues and curiously followed her as she started walking
again.

"He asked me if I was an
intruder or a guest."

"And?" I frowned at her
question, trying to remember that moment exactly to understand what
it is she wanted me to find.

"Who am I?" Datura asked.
"And I had hoped-"

My eyebrows shot up in
shock. "He was surprised that I didn't know him." Picking up the
pace, I finally caught up with her and then halted us both in our
steps so she could give me her full attention. "When I saw his
picture, he looked familiar, but I decided to just write that off.
Was I wrong? Have I met him before?" I pressed.

"How did you ever manage to
deny the truth of your feelings for him, when every time he is the
subject of conversation, you become so very passionate?"

I waved that away
flippantly. "Yes, we've established I don't know how to prioritize
my wants and thoughts. Now go back to answering my
questions."

I blinked in surprise when
she laughed. Vervaine didn't laugh often. Yet she should, it looked
good on her. "He was your Solenum before you met Solenum." That
stung. So much so, I stumbled back and away from her, gulping
audibly and feeling light headed.

"He knows you didn't
purposely forget him, Cali." Vervaine murmured, the laughter gone
when she realized I hadn't taken it as well as she thought I
might.

Wincing, I placed my hand
over my chest when it started to tighten. "But I forgot him
nonetheless." Tearing my eyes off the ground, I looked back up at
Vervaine. "Who took my memories?"

"The Elders did. The
Rangers sell many types of products and substances that can mess
with the body and the mind." She paused. "Even with the soul
sometimes. In your case, a powder that is said to have been
scrapped from a tree as black as coal located deep down in the
Sunken Cities is what stripped you of a specific set of memories
when they made you inhale it." When she noticed I was light headed,
she gestured for me to sit down and had the kindness to sit as well
so our eyes would remain level. She took my hand in her gloved one.
"Because of the numerous harmful encounters you've had with the
Regius during your younger years, and the possibility that you may
or may not be Sage's as well as Kalmia's, the Elders
feared
that if you were
privy to such dark memories, you might harness them in the wrong
manner while growing up. We don't process things the same way when
we are children."

"They thought I'd become a
danger to myself and everyone close to me." Some of the anger
faded. I knew that I'd be upset about them having made decisions in
my stead forever, but unfortunately their reasoning was logical.
Exhaling loudly and tiredly, I pursed my lips up at Vervaine. "Is
there a way to remove the barrier? I assume you risked telling me
because I'm no longer at an age where I may harness the knowledge
to do harm."

"There is..." I blinked at
how fragile her voice had just sounded. Her hand clenched mine
tightly and her breathing sped up. "I can destroy the barrier." She
wasn't afraid, but neither was she the picture of comfortable.
"Seers can do more than see the future or the past, or get a good
read on people. It's said that when two Seers touch one another's
cores, they have the ability to create barriers that can keep them
out of harm's way. We believe the barrier placed around the Rangers
Alley and that which keeps the souls within the Valley were created
by Seers." Vervaine pulled her hand free from mine only so she
could pull off the thin black glove gingerly. "If we can do this,
it's because the power of foresight is wanted by many. It's the key
to knowledge. Many a King, Leader and Elder have been known to prey
on the Seers at one time or another throughout the centuries.
Barriers can keep the enemy outside."