Relentless Rhythm (Tempest #4) (33 page)

There was more than one type of bravery. And surviving was mine.

I was really good at it, and that was the way I’d decided to end my story. That was the choice Astral had made. John and Michael would come to understand that eventually.

I blocked the bitch’s hand before she could put it on me. “No offense, baby. I’ll get you off, but no touching the junk or we’re done.”

“Alright, Duffy,” she slurred in an irritatingly mood killing voice. She wobbled unsteadily in her bright red fuck me heels.

Tonight I was embracing my inner darkness, covering up in it like some scratchy bed bug infested blanket from a seedy by the hour motel.

I don’t know why I’d fought it so long. Except that with April, I’d felt
clean
for once. Now I was about to hop back into the smelly dumpster of my true life.

This is what you are
, I told myself. What you’ll always be. Garbage I was and to garbage I would return like the crack whore that spawned me.

It was stupid to make a play for Shaina Bentley when I’d gone down to Seattle the weekend of War’s mother’s funeral. Shaina wasn’t interested, and I hadn’t been either, not really. It was a dick move, doomed to fail from the start. Like everything else I’d tried to get over April. I had started to be desperate by then.

War was desperate, too, but in a serious long term way when it came to the star of
Pinky Swear
. He was here. In Vancouver. He’d come right away when I told him his love interest was filming up here, hanging out at the Mine, and getting into all sorts of trouble. He was acting like a man totally possessed, like a guy who’d finally found the real deal. Exactly the way I had been with April.

The bitch with the skirt hitched over her hips wiggled her bony ass to get my attention in the tight quarters of the Mine’s restroom stall. Sighing, I rolled on the condom. The door rattled behind me. “Busy,” I growled glancing over my shoulder and meeting an all too familiar pair of startled jade eyes.

“Shit!” she exclaimed, spinning around.

I knew it was just wishful thinking on my part, but I could have sworn I’d seen more than just a flicker of surprise in her gaze.

“C’mon, Duffy,” the skank squirmed again like she had pubic lice, which was probably the case. “What’s wrong?”

Too many things to list.
“Sorry, baby.” I peeled off the condom and tucked my rapidly deflating dick back into my pants. “I just remembered something I forgot.”

She tugged down her skirt and turned, giving me a pouty drunken look. “Oh, yeah. What’s that?”

“That I don’t want you. No offense.”

I left her behind, and saw April just exiting the adjacent restroom. I sped up and grabbed her arm, spinning her around. “What’s you’re hurry? I asked cruelly. “I thought you liked to watch? Or maybe you wanna take a more active role? For old times’ sake?”

Her cheeks flagged with red, and her eyes flashed with the kind of fire I hadn’t seen since we had our thing. I liked that so much better than the indifferent routine she’d given me earlier when she’d started her shift. I’d come to the Mine well aware that tonight was her first night back. Maybe in the recesses of my fucked up mind, I hadn’t really wanted to get laid tonight. Maybe I’d just wanted her to catch me. To be jealous maybe.

“Why the hell not?” I prodded. “Could be magic?” I brought her hand down to my dick that’d gotten hard the minute I’d gotten close enough to catch a whiff of her familiar floral scent. She yanked her arm back, looking nervous as shit as she glanced up and down the crowded hall.

“For you, maybe. I’m over it.” She turned away from me like she was the offended party, and it pissed me the hell off.

I caught her again and got her up against the wall. “I think that’s a lie. You wanna play it that way? Fine.” She squirmed against me, her hands in the center of my chest, and fuck me because I liked them there. I missed that body and that spirit of hers. Her gaze dropped to my mouth and that was all the additional encouragement I needed to be more of an asshole.

I took her mouth and from the first touch of her satiny lips, I was gone, her taste making me remember all the things I’d tried like hell to forget.

She whimpered and her fingers wadded up my shirt, not to push me away, but to pull me closer. She clung to me like she didn’t want to let me go, jumped up, and wrapped her sexy legs around my waist like a vise.

“Get a room,” some grunt in the restroom line called sarcastically, and it was like the green light switched to red. She released me, smoothed a hand over my shirt, and tried to get away.

“Nope,” I said, tightening my hold. “No way. I’ve gone without for long enough.” I shifted, threw her over my shoulder, and strode to the storage room, while she ineffectively pounded my back.

Ignoring her fists, I slammed the door with my booted foot, pinned her against the wall.

“Stop bullying me,” she panted, glaring at me defiantly. “I don’t like it.”

“Then why don’t you tell that to your husband?”

She inhaled sharply. “Why don’t you try your caveman act out on Rebecca instead?”

So this was it. Had she shut us the fuck down because of something to do with that bondage club bitch? I squeezed my eyes tightly shut for a moment knowing I should’ve told her about that hookup early on. I’d had a feeling that shit would come back to bite me in the ass.” I eyed her warily. “James told you about her, I guess?”

She didn’t say anything, the wounded look on her face gave me my answer. “Why am I not surprised? What does surprise me is why the hell you would believe anything he says. You said you trusted me. What did I ever do to make you doubt me? So I stuck my dick in her. I wasn’t the only one I can guarantee you that. And anyway that was way before you. I bet he glossed over that little detail.”

She nodded her head slowly.

“It happened the first night I saw you at PTU,” I said softly. “I never gave her a second thought. Just like all the others. Except for you. I haven’t had anyone since we were together. I don’t want anyone else but you, Kitten.”

Her face softened a bit. “But what about that woman just now?”

“Nothing happened. But what was I supposed to do, April? Stay celibate the rest of my fucking life? After the way it was with us I’m probably destined for disappointment anyway. I waited here for you for hours praying you would show. All I got for my trouble was a ‘Dear John’ text.”

“What are you talking about?” she whispered, her body still as if she was afraid to move, afraid my answer might break her into a million pieces.

I froze. Her question seemed genuine. “The one you sent Mel. She showed me on her phone. The one that said all the bullshit about us being a mistake, and that you were going back to your husband.”

“I didn’t send any text.” She spoke the words. I heard the truth in them, and I put it all together in a flash, the trail of bread crumbs leading directly to the two people who I knew had screwed us. “James made it so I couldn’t go anywhere or contact anyone the night he got back. The night George died. He broke my phone. He probably sent the message before that, but I guarantee you Mel knew it wasn’t from me.” She pulled in a shaky breath.

“Ok, that explains a lot. But why haven’t you tried to contact me since then?”

“Why haven’t you?” she threw back.

“I did… to that stupid broken phone.” My eyes burned with lingering accusation as I pushed her further, knowing in my gut there was still more secrets she was keeping from me. “And why did you treat me the way you did at the funeral? The way you were with me I figured you’d made your choice. I just assumed you weren’t willing to take a chance on a messed up guy from Southside.”

“I think we both got things wrong,” she said sadly, her hand betraying her feelings as she softly touched my face.

“No. I think it’s only you who has it wrong.” I covered her hand on my face, trapping it there, and took the other brushing my lips back and forth against her palm. When I pulled back, I noticed her bottom lip was trembling. “Why are you so upset if we don’t mean anything? Why do you kiss me the way you do? You burn for me the same way I burn for you. Your body gives you away, Kitten. Tell me I’m wrong. Tell me you respond to him the way you respond to me?”

She lowered her eyes, and a sliver of warmth thawed the frost in my chest.

“Want me to show you again?” I pushed. “Show you how crazy it gets the minute I put my mouth on you?”

“No.” She withdrew her hands and that timorous look I loathed took over her features again. “You can’t... We can’t. They’ll see. I tried to tell you from the beginning, but I was selfish. I wanted you so badly.”

“Who’ll see, Kitten?”

“James’ men.”

“You mean those security guys who escorted me away at the funeral? The ones who’ve been watching you like a hawk all night.”

“They aren’t security guards. They’re his lieutenants.”

What the fuck?
Recognition slowly sunk in, the last piece to the puzzle finally sliding into place. “He’s mafia?”

She nodded.

Holy fucking shit.

“He was pretty low level when we got married, and I was too naïve then. But things changed after his partner disappeared, and he took over PTU. The kind of guys he hangs around with now.” She shook her head. “They’re the real thing.”

Bloody hell.

It probably literally
had
been bloody for James’ missing partner. The thought of April living with a dangerous guy like that made ice re-crystalize in my veins.

“Shit, April. Why didn’t you say something sooner?”

“Really?” Her brows rose. “You think that would have been wise? Keeping your mouth shut is the first lesson you learn in this business. And now James hates you so much that they have instructions to kill you if they catch me with you again.”

I ran my thumbs over the furrow between her brows, but it didn’t smooth out. This was one helluva a fucked up mess.

“I’ve never stopped caring, Dizzy Lowell. You relentlessly pursued me until I gave in and started to dream, to hope again even. But James is smart and sadistic. He’s not afraid to use the people I love against me. He won’t hesitate. My mom. My brothers. You. You’re all at risk. I can’t ever be sure he wasn’t involved somehow in my stepfather’s accident. George had started asking a lot of questions about James’ business.”

“Fuck.” No wonder she was scared. I pulled her into me. I was scared as shit, too, but I couldn’t let on. I kissed the top of her head, running my nose along the silk strands filling my lungs with her scent, trying to calm down so I could think. “I’ll figure this out, April. But one thing I need to know. Is this for real? Do you want to be with him or me?”

“Being with you is impossible.” She pulled back to look deep into my eyes. “But it would be a dream come true.”

Bang. Bang. Bang.

Shit
. We jumped apart. Someone was beating on the metal stock room door.

“Mrs. Reynolds? Everything ok in there?”

“Yes, yes. I’m sorry, Smith. I accidently closed the door.” Her expression turned grim. Nothing remained in her eyes now but fear and resignation. “You’ve got to hide,” she told me. “That’s one of James’ men. They can’t find you with me.”

I would’ve said what the hell, had it just been me. I’d never been afraid to gamble, but I had to play this thing smart. For her sake and her family’s.

So before I hid, I pushed all my chips to the center of the table. “I love you, April.”

“I love you, too, Dizzy.”

“Don’t give up hope. Be careful. Be safe, and trust me. I’ll figure out a way to get you away from him. I won’t let you down.”

She nodded, but I could tell her faith was weak. I was just going to have to believe enough for both of us.