Restless Billionaire (24 page)

 
          
That
evening, like an automaton, she got dressed to go to the hotel in a long
stretchy black jersey dress. For the first time she’d noticed that she couldn’t
get into her jeans anymore. She put makeup on her eyes purely to disguise the
shadows underneath and to feel like she had some armour on. Slipping into flat
sandals and draping a long shawl around her shoulders that she could pull over
her head and belly to disguise herself, sari-style, she left the house for the
hotel.

 
          
Despite
her disguise, the minute she walked into the foyer of the luxurious hotel, a
man stepped forward and said obsequiously, ‘Miss Adani?’

 
          
She
nodded. And he gestured with a hand. ‘Please, allow me to show you to Mr Wolfe’s
suite.’

 
          
Of
course, she realised a little hysterically. It wasn’t as if she’d ever gone to
or come from his suite by the conventional route the first time around.

 
          
They
ascended in a lift marked
Private
and
came to a smooth halt all too soon. Aneesa’s palms felt sweaty and her heart
was beating unevenly. She prayed she wouldn’t faint again.

 
          
The
concierge, or manager, ushered her out and opened the door to the suite. ‘Have
a good evening, Miss Adani.’

 
          
And
then the door was shut behind her. Aneesa let the shawl drop from her head to
her shoulders. Déjà vu washed over her with bittersweet nostalgia. The suite
was much the same as it had been that night. It appeared to be empty, only one
or two lamps throwing out little halos of golden light.

 
          
She
could see though that there were lights coming from the terrace, and the
sliding doors were open, sending the evening breeze drifting through. The
evening was a dusky opalescent colour outside and Aneesa could see the
ubiquitous Indian kites floating against the darkening sky as people practiced
off their rooftops.

 
          
A
sudden feeling of anger gripped her. Why wasn’t Sebastian meeting her
downstairs in more anonymous surroundings, under brighter lights? She hated him
for bringing her back into this seductive world. And where was he anyway?
Aneesa suddenly needed air, needed to breathe before she saw Sebastian and
faced the final demise of their relationship as lovers, before it became about
the logistics of parenting from their respective countries and homes.

 
          
She
made for the terrace and assumed he was in the office room, perhaps catching up
on a call. She walked straight outside and went to the ornately carved stone
wall. Gripping it, she took a deep breath, much as she had that night all those
weeks before.

 
          
And,
exactly like that night, a voice from behind her drawled seductively, ‘Please
don’t tell me you’re thinking of jumping.’

 
          
Aneesa’s
heart stopped, and started again with an uneven beat. This time she didn’t
whirl around in shock and surprise. She stayed where she was for a long moment,
and then steeled herself before turning to face Sebastian, and when she did
she
nearly fell down all over again. He was devastatingly
handsome, even dressed in just a white shirt and dark trousers. But it was as
if she was seeing him for the first time.

 
          
She
smiled bitterly in reaction. ‘I had no intention of jumping that night, and I
certainly have no intention of jumping now. No man is worth that.’

 
          
He
strolled towards her then with hands in his pockets, making her want to take in
his lean hips. She fought the urge to look.

 
          
‘But
what you’re implying with that statement is that you’ve weighed up the
possibility and found it lacking …’

 
          
Aneesa
snorted and felt a little bewildered. Why was Sebastian being so … seductive?
Why wasn’t he being all businesslike? Something caught her eye behind him …
and why was there a table for two set for
dinner complete with a softly flickering candle and an ice bucket with
champagne?

 
          
Pain
gripped her so hard she saw stars. She garbled out, ‘Oh, God … I’m sorry. You
have a date. You were out here preparing and I came out …’

 
          
She
went to walk back inside but suddenly Sebastian was there, gripping her arm.
Her shawl fell to the ground.

 
          
‘No,
no one else is coming here, Aneesa, it’s just you and me.’

 
          
‘But
…’
Her
voice wouldn’t work. She swallowed. ‘Why? Like
this? I thought you just wanted to discuss arrangements.’

 
          
He
dropped her arm from his grip and for the first time she saw a crack in his
composure. He ran a hand through his hair. ‘I guess I do … in a way.’

 
          
Aneesa
felt seriously overwhelmed and was afraid that, much like last night, she’d end
up doing or saying something to give herself away spectacularly.

 
          
Sebastian
looked at her so intensely though that she couldn’t think straight.

 
          
‘Do
you remember after we made love last night … do you remember saying anything?’

 
          
Aneesa
forced her sluggish brain to work. What on earth could he be—? She froze. Every
part of her body froze. She remembered now, in chilling detail. She’d whispered
the fateful words. She’d thought she’d just said them in her head. But she’d
said them
out loud
. No wonder he’d
left so fast this morning.

 
          
She
tried to back away but couldn’t because the wall was behind her. She
alternately shook and nodded her head, her brain imploding. ‘I … I’m not sure
what you mean …’

 
          
Sebastian
was grim. ‘You said you loved me.’

 
          
Any
hope of retaining dignity fled in an instant. Aneesa gulped. ‘Well … I may have
… I mean, I don’t remember but perhaps afterwards … but it didn’t mean
anything.’

 
          
A
muscle in his jaw twitched. ‘So it was just a helpless transitory emotional
response to a physical act? Is that what you’re saying?’

 
          
Aneesa
gulped again. Sebastian looked so formidable. And then she seemed to regain
some sanity, or at least equilibrium. ‘Why, Sebastian? Why do you even care
what I might have said? You’ve made it very clear all along that nothing would
come of this relationship except two adults having a baby. From the moment I
arrived in England you fought my presence.

 
          
‘So
what on earth does it matter to you what I might have said, or what I might
feel? You’re leaving tomorrow.’

 
          
‘Am
I?’ He laughed but it sounded pained. ‘To be honest, I don’t know if I’m coming
or going and I’ve been feeling like that for a long time now….’

 
          
He
brushed past her then to rest his hands on the stone balustrade, and dropped
his head between his shoulders. Something about him looked so tortured in that
moment that Aneesa had to fight back the urge to put out her hand to touch him
in comfort.

 
          
His
head came up and his eyes speared hers. ‘But I’ve also been feeling alive, and
connected
, for the first time in my
life.’

 
          
He
stood tall again and Aneesa felt curiously weightless. He reached out a hand
and curled it around her jaw, fingers around her neck under the heavy fall of
her hair. She could feel a slight tremor in his hand and her heart tripped.

 
          
‘I
never … wanted to create a family. I never wanted to marry. I never wanted to
fall in love. I had no frame of reference for all of those things that most
people aspire to, and take for granted. I’ve always been terrified that
something of my father’s twisted genes was lying dormant in me and that basic
happiness was something I could never have, as if I was jinxed in some way.

 
          
‘But
seeing Nathaniel get married, and Jacob come home to try and make amends …
seeing him come to terms with the past, and the way he’s trying to bring us
together again, has changed my perspective. Hearing you say you love me last
night—whether you meant it or not, it freed something inside me. I hadn’t
allowed myself to think that you could possibly have feelings for me. You’d
only come to me because of the baby …

 
          
‘These
past few days, being with your family … It’s so … easy. They’re easy. Love for
them is freely given and taken. You have no idea what it’s like to witness
that, to experience it as a reality, not just an elusive concept.’ He smiled
bleakly. ‘Well, you do. You’ve grown up with it. It’s why you’re so open and so
… honest.’

 
          
Aneesa
felt like cringing amidst the shock at what he was saying. He had to be
referring to her constant nagging and questioning to get him to open up and
spill his innermost secrets.

 
          
He
seemed to struggle with something, his hand still on her jaw, and finally said,
‘My family … you’ve seen something of what we experienced. It’s not an excuse
but perhaps it’s how I can explain to you why it’s taken me so long to realise
the most important thing of my life.’

 
          
Sebastian
put his other hand on her jaw now and stepped in close. Inexplicably tears
started to fill Aneesa’s eyes and she wasn’t even sure why she was crying.
Sebastian smiled. ‘Your eyes … do you know that they are like two worlds of
emotion? The first night we met I was in awe of how expressive they were.’

 
          
Aneesa
struggled for control, but couldn’t speak.

 
          
‘Last
night, I felt our baby move …’

 
          
Aneesa
frowned. She’d felt flutters for a few days now but had put it down to
Sebastian’s effect on her.

 
          
‘…
and
for the first time I really felt connected to him …
or her. This baby is mine,
ours
. And
I don’t want it to be brought up on two different continents, being shuttled
back and forth on holidays.
Isolated.
A lonely child.’

 
          
Aneesa
sobered up, her tears cleared. She had a feeling she knew exactly what
Sebastian was getting at now, what he meant by ‘the most important thing.’ He
wanted to do the right thing, take care of them, because now he felt he could
deal with it.
And because she’d stupidly revealed that she
had feelings for him.
She took down his hands.

 
          
‘Sebastian,
I know you’ve been through a lot with your family and I’m so sorry that you had
to go through that. But believe me, with the greatest will in the world, a
relationship that’s not based on love is not going to be the best thing for
your child.
Our child.
I’m sorry if that sounds
impossibly idealistic to you and I can see that you’ve had some revelations,
but please … don’t make us do this.’

 
          
She
looked away because those damn tears were coming back. She felt rather than
heard a movement and looked down when she felt her hand being tugged into
Sebastian’s. He was on one knee at her feet and the tears sprang in earnest.

 
          
She
shook her head. ‘Please, Sebastian, don’t … you don’t know how cruel it is.’

 
          
He
looked up at her. ‘What would be cruel is if you were to turn your back on me
and deny me the only chance of happiness I’ll ever have.’

 
          
He
gripped her hand tighter. ‘You may or may not have meant what you said last
night, but all day I’ve been praying that you did. Aneesa … I’m in love with
you. I’m so fathoms-deep in love with you that I’m drowning. I’ve been falling
for you since the moment our eyes met that evening, when you looked at me and
made my world go spinning in the other direction. But I had no idea what was
happening. Not until we came back here … and I saw what love is, and recognised
it for the first time in my life.