Returning Injury (6 page)

Rebecca thought that it would be nice to have him around for a while, not because of the coyotes but because she missed him. He would also help ease her mind about Roy. But her dad didn’t know anything about Roy, and she wanted to keep it that way. Plus, she needed time to herself to get her work done. “Dad, I’m fine. I have a ton of work to do and I’m staying safe. I honestly don’t go far from the house. I’ve heard the coyotes, but I haven’t seen any since Jack left. Lily and I will be fine. But thanks for the information. I will use it if I need to. I love you, Dad.”

“I love you too, honey. You call me if you change your mind or if you need anything, okay?”

“Okay, I will.” She hung up the phone.

Rebecca was raised by her father and grew up on the wrong side of the tracks. She lived in a tough neighborhood, went to the toughest schools, and had the toughest friends. Her friends were like
her; some of them had hard home lives and not much money, but she always felt safe and happy and loved by her friends.

Because of her father and her friends, Rebecca didn’t learn about the submissive role of a female. She didn’t know that a girl couldn’t beat up a boy if he deserved it; she didn’t know that a girl couldn’t be ready to throw down if she needed to. She liked being a little rough around the edges.

Although Rebecca felt tough and feisty at times, the last time she got together with her old neighborhood friends, she was reminded that she was usually the one in the background, watching.

“The follower,” they teased, “not feared… or tough...”

“Oh, yeah,” Rebecca laughed and flexed her muscles. “Did you have the nickname ‘Rocky’ when you were in junior high?”

They all rolled their eyes and laughed at her.

It was true and it suited her just fine. She had never been loud or a fight instigator; she was usually behind the others keeping quiet. But Rebecca did have her share of problems. She had been provoked into fights and had been sent to the principal’s office a few times for doing things like ditching class to drive a sick friend home or starting a friendly food fight in the lunchroom. It was during that last visit with her friends Cecilia, Rachel, Vicki and Lupe that she realized they had taught each other to be strong. She felt honored to have such strong and loyal friends.

Rebecca knew her dad trusted her, though he rarely knew what she was doing. She had the feeling he knew that she could be a little impish, but he didn’t know that she often stayed out all night and occasionally smoked and drank with other kids from the wrong side of town. He was disappointed in her at times, but never angry.
Rebecca’s dad had two rules for his girls: graduate from high school and don’t have sex until after you graduate from high school. Rebecca was sure she could follow both rules, but she was never too sure about her older sister Lisa.

Rebecca’s life revolved around her friends, fun and a little bit of trouble, while Lisa’s life revolved around boys, makeup, bras and panties, high-heeled shoes and designer clothing that they never could afford. Lisa was in love with a new boy, heartbroken and fighting with a friend every other week. Lisa shared her life’s dramas openly with their dad, whereas Rebecca kept everything to herself because she didn’t think she had much worth sharing. Rebecca laughed remembering when she got her period and how all her friends got together to teach her how to use a tampon. She was the late bloomer of the group.

Rebecca would love to plan another get together with her old friends. Class reunions just never came often enough.

The phone rang again. It was Jack’s mom calling to tell her that she had seen the same coyote special on TV. She said she believed that both of the attacks in the United States had been on children, and the Canadian woman had also been small.

Rebecca became even more afraid of the coyotes.

She thought about when Jack’s parents and Rebecca’s dad had helped them move into their country home. They claimed they came for moral support, but they really came to see the house. Jack’s mom had fun bossing around the movers, which was fine with
Rebecca. Their dads enjoyed looking over the utility room, hanging pictures and spending time outside in the country.

When they found what was left of a freshly killed porcupine, they became aware of the coyotes in the area. Then when Lily joined their family, Rebecca’s dad was immediately uneasy. Jack and Rebecca wished that they had paid more attention to his concerns.

Rebecca leaned over and kissed Lily’s head again, then reached for Angie’s packet to pick up where she had left off. She pulled out a sheet of paper with disturbing photographs of women in pornography. Below the four photos of women in bondage were four photos of the prisoners from the Abu Ghraib prison scandal. The photos were the same: a woman being peed on and a prisoner being peed on; a woman lying on the cement floor tied up in bondage and blindfolded and a prisoner tied up and blindfolded in bondage; women naked in a pyramid and prisoners naked in a pyramid. Rebecca was disgusted, “I guess if you’re a woman you are supposed to like this kind of treatment, but not if you are a prisoner of war.”

Lily sat up quickly startled by the sound of Rebecca’s voice. Rebecca pet Lily. “I’m sorry, honey. Mama’s just talking out loud.”

At the bottom of the sheet it said, “There was such outrage about the prisoners. Where is the outrage for what is happening to our daughters?”

“That is so true…” again Rebecca exclaimed, wondering how the women in pornography and prostitution felt after seeing the Iraqi prisoner photos. She wondered if they made the connection. Rebecca thought about the constitution and the first amendment.
She was certain that the first amendment was never intended to protect people who wanted to hurt children and young women.

Next Rebecca read Angie’s article, “Pornographic Material Needs Warning Label.”

Pornographic material can be as destructive as cigarette smoking. The sale, distribution and use of it put everyone in danger, including men. This destructive pollution relies on men to make their industry billions of dollars. In exchange, the men are losing their families, becoming impotent and losing the sense of reality of women and how they want to be treated.

The same way cigarette advertisements go after children, pornography goes after men. They start with the bait: Women.

Some women who are forced and others who have such low self-worth feel their bodies are the only way to survive in this country. The same message is created by this industry. Then, they assure men it’s okay to participate by backing it with false information about men and women concerning sex. Everything from soft-porn magazines to hard-core pornography is filled with these harmful messages, and men accept it and believe in it.

This industry encourages men to lie to their wives or stay single, knowing that a man’s wife is less likely to put up with pornography in the home; therefore the enterprise loses a buyer and loses money. So while men are trying to convince women to “get with the times” or “I only have it for the articles,” women must understand that men are being victimized, too.

An obsession with pornography isn’t completely the man’s fault. Not only does pornography cause a hormonal change, there is also a chemical reaction in the brain causing the inability to differentiate between reality and fantasy, and, in a lot of men, it’s an addiction. It starts with a soft-core magazine that leads to an uncontrollable hunger where satisfying it becomes more and more difficult.

Like cigarettes, we need warning labels on all pornographic material. WARNING: Pornography may cause an illusional way of looking at women, children and sex. It may cause impotency and addiction. It can also lead to the destruction of your family or the inability to have one.

In addition, we need hot lines and support in every state to help men realize it’s a problem before it’s too late.

Rebecca liked the different angle in the article, that men were also victims of pornography. She loved the idea of a group of great, strong men getting together and suing the sex industry the way people sued the tobacco industry. They could argue they were never warned that looking at pornography could become an addiction, or cause a loss of money and time. They didn’t know they could lose their families, lose their ability to have an erection without pornography or lose touch with reality when it came to women and children.

She thought about how laws were changed to protect nonsmokers so maybe laws could be made to protect women and children, especially considering that pedophiles and rapists often use pornography before committing violent crimes against women and children. Clearly, laws can be changed, amendments can be made.

Rebecca and Lily were worried by a sudden gust of wind that sounded like sand being thrown against the windows. It was raining again. The rising wind was like nothing Rebecca had experienced before and she was scared. Fearing the windows would come crashing in, she grabbed the remote and closed all the blinds to the big living-room windows. The blinds would at least block the glass
from spilling into their home. Lily was also upset. Rebecca turned up the stereo and tried to relax.

She thought about that card she received from Roy that was still in her office: To: Rebecca, An Angel in my Heart. From: Roy. The memory of when she received the flowers and card made her smile. It wasn’t all bad. She actually had a couple of great memories of Roy.

Rebecca had stayed home from work because she wasn’t feeling well; she told her boss she would work from home. There was a knock on her door. When she opened the door, flowers and a white paper bag were sitting on the floor. She bent over to pick them up, and there was Roy with a surgical mask covering his face. “Is it safe to come it?”

Rebecca laughed. “Yes, it is.” She held up the bag, “Chicken soup?”

“Chicken soup.” He lowered his mask and followed her inside. Roy also had two movies so, needless to say, she didn’t get any work done. But she did have a lot of fun with Roy. He stayed with her most of the day and never made a pass. He waited on her, teased her and let her nap.

It was ironic, but that was her favorite memory of him and probably the exact day he took the key to her apartment. She tried to remember. She knew she had fallen asleep during one of the movies, and she left him alone when she went to the bathroom. Roy had only been in her place two or three other times before he started stalking her.

Rebecca remembered the time they had gone out for lunch; he had a wandering eye, he was moody and inconsiderate. When they got to her place to watch a movie, she was annoyed and didn’t want him there. Before they started the movie, he used her bathroom. She went in after him, closed the door and saw his footprints on her freshly cleaned rug. She could clearly see his footprints facing the toilet where he stood while peeing. With his footprints irritating her so much, she knew she had bigger issues with Roy, and she told him she wasn’t feeling well and he had to go. After he left, she shook out her rug and knew she had to end it.

But Roy convinced her to go out with him one more time. So they went to a trendy restaurant, then for drinks to a bar with a band. They both knew a couple of guys in the band. The evening started off nicely, and she was glad she’d given Roy one more chance. But later in the night he seemed nervous and troubled, almost angry for no apparent reason, and Rebecca knew it would be their last date. She had had enough of her erratic dates with Roy. She told him she had to get going. He didn’t want to go but agreed to take her home. On their walk to the car in the bar parking lot, Roy pulled out a single cigarette and started smoking. The shock of Roy smoking made her laugh. “I didn’t know you smoked.”