Authors: Airicka Phoenix
Kia
The fact that I’d walked up those stairs a dozen times should have helped ease me, not make me queasier. But every step I took that brought me closer to Nessie’s door only filled me with greater dread. I didn’t know how she would take my presence, or if she would welcome it. For all I knew, she could turn me away. I kept replaying everything we ever talked about those last few days at the cabin. I tried to remember everything I ever said to her, anything that might give me some answers as to why she was so upset with me. I understood the situation with Gary and the pictures was something that no doubt hurt, but why would she push me away? It made no sense. Well, I was going to find out, or at least attempt to. The thing I did know though was this would be my last attempt to reach out to her. I wasn’t going to throw myself at a door that refused to open. Not saying I wouldn’t be there when she was ready to talk, but I wasn’t going to keep groveling for a friendship that was beginning to feel one sided. I knew I would never treat her the way she was treating me and that hurt the worst.
I knocked softly on her door. “Nes
… Vanessa? It’s Kia. Can I come in?”
There
were several minutes of silence and I wondered if she was sleeping or ignoring me. But it was quickly forgotten when the door opened and I found myself peering into her blue eyes. They were cold and distant. Nothing at all like the eyes I was used to.
“Hey,” I murmured. “How are you?”
She propped a shoulder against the frame and folded her arms. “My boyfriend cheated on me and the entire school thinks I’m a whore. Including my best friend. I dunno. How do you think I’m doing?”
I grimaced. “I don’t think you’re—”
“You could have just asked me you know,” she said offhandedly. “You could have come to me and asked if it was me in that picture. Instead, you ran to my brother. That doesn’t sound like something a
friend
would do.”
“That’s not fair. You didn’t give me a choice! I tried to talk to you today. I tried! But you pushed me away.”
Heat flashed behind her eyes. “So you go to my brother behind my back?”
“I’m sorry!” I cried. “I wanted to help. I’ve been worried about you.”
She snorted. “Oh I saw plenty how worried you were, Kia. You were practically crying tears of blood.”
I frowned. “
What’s that supposed to mean?”
She pushed off the frame. “
It means you lied to me and used me just like Taylor.”
“
That’s bullshit!” I shouted, trying to be heard over her. “I never once lied to you, nor have I ever used you, especially when it came to Adam.”
“
Didn’t you?” she hissed. “I told you how I felt about my friends dating my brother, yet you still went after him and you lied about it.” She threw her arms open wide. “I invited you to spend time with me, not screw my brother while my back was turned.”
“We were going to
tell you!” I finally found my tongue to blurt. “We were waiting until after Christmas and then that stuff with Gary happened and—”
“So this is my fault? You lied to me because my boyfriend cheated on me?”
“No!” I cried. “I care about him, Vanessa. But that doesn’t mean I’m not your friend. I am. I would never do anything—”
She arched a brow. “To hurt me?
To stab me in the back?”
“
Why can’t I be your friend and be with Adam?” I pleaded.
“Because you can’t!” she screamed. “Adam can have any girl he wants, but you were supposed to be my friend.
”
“I am your friend, Vanessa!”
“Were you thinking of that friendship when you had my brother’s tongue down your throat? Did you stop to consider how I would feel about this? I told you weeks ago that I would never forgive the friend that used me for my brother.”
“I didn’t use you! Why won’t you listen to me? I love Adam. I didn’t mean for it to happen. I didn’t set out intentionally to hurt you. I didn’t even know he was your brother when I fell for him—”
“But when you did and I warned you, you should have—”
“What? Stopped loving him? Is that even possible? How do you just stop loving someone?”
She just stared at me, the hatred and anger dark behind her eyes. “I don’t know, but I’m finding it really easy.”
That comment
didn’t hurt as much as it should it. Instead, I felt a burst of anger as I stared at her wondering how she could be so detached.
“I’m not going to stop being your friend, Nessie.
But I’m tired of this game. I’ve always been there for you. I’ve always stood up for you and I have always put you ahead of everything else. But I can’t understand how you can stand there, look me in the eye and ask me to give up something that makes me happy just because it’s not what you want. I would never make you pick between me and someone you love, even if I didn’t like them, because friends stand by each other. It’s funny because up until you, I had no friends. I had no one. But even I know that you’re supposed to have each other’s backs.” I took a step back from her. “When you’re ready for a friend, I’m there for you, but until then…”
“
Fine!” she hissed, blue eyes sparking. “Go to Adam. I hope it was worth losing our friendship.” I curled my fingers at my sides. “I hope your anger and bitterness was worth it.”
Turning on my heels, I marched down the stairs. I was halfway
to the bottom before the resounding bang of a door slamming bounced off the walls. It wasn’t a physical blow but I felt it as though she’d smacked me. My gut echoed with the hollowness stretching up inside me, swallowing me up.
“Kia.” Gentle hands turned me.
“I need to go home.”
Without another word, we grabbed our things and he drove me.
“I’m sorry,” he said as he walked me to the front door. “This is all my fault.”
“Stop!” I whirled around on him. “Don’t. This isn’t your fault. It’s not mine either. Sure we didn’t make the best choices, but we did our best to make them right.
I’ll be there for her when she’s ready for a friend, but I can’t stick around and get punished for falling in love. She needs to realize the feeling isn’t going to go away and I’m not giving you up.”
His fingers were surprisingly warm as they tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “
Good, because I’m not giving you up either.”
It was ridiculous to feel relief at such a time, but it warmed all the places left chilled by Nessie’s absence. I squeezed his fingers once before taking a step back.
“I have homework.”
He checked his watch. “I need to go home and get ready for hockey.” He raised his head and looked at me. “Call me later?”
I nodded. “I will.”
With a quick kiss, we parted ways.
“Mom?” I let my jacket and bag hit the floor by the door. I kicked off my boots, uncaring of the snow and slush that splattered everywhere. “Joanne?”
Joanne poked her head out of the kitchen, her blonde curls tumbling around her shoulders. “Hey sweetie, you’re home late. Everything
… Kia?”
She was there before the first tear slipped down my cheek. Her arms closed around me and I was yanked into her chest.
“What’s wrong? What happened? Carol!” She called for my mother, all the while stroking my hair. “Come into the kitchen. I’ll make you some tea.”
“Jo-Jo?” Mom’s footsteps thundered on the steps and she was at the bottom as Joanne led me into the kitchen. “Kia?” Mom was instantly on my other side, her hands bruising on my arm. “What happened? Did someone hurt you?”
I was pushed into a stool and held there by my mother as Joanne bustled around the kitchen making tea.
“Tell us what happened,” Joanne prompted, moving to take the stool on my other side. She pressed a Kleenex into my hand.
Mom and Joanne already knew the situation between me, Adam and Nessie. They knew I needed to come clean to my friend before it was too late. I fully expected them to side with Nessie, to tell me I was in the wrong and I’d brought it on myself. But Mom rubbed my hand as Joanne rose when the tea kettle whistled.
“Well, I personally think you did the right thing,” Mom said evenly. “Don’t get me wrong, I adore Vanessa, but she was being unreasonable. It’s perfectly understandable to be upset that you kept it from her, but she could have
at least let you explain, what with you guys being best friends and all.”
On my other side, Joanne nodded. “I think she’ll realize that sooner or later and you guys will be friends again in no time.”
That was easier said than done. I hated not being able to phone her and hear her jabber on about clothes or the hottest guy. I missed hanging out with her. I couldn’t believe how screwed up everything had gotten in only a matter of days.
“Oh! We have something for you,” Joanne said, doing a little bounce on the balls of her feet. “We’ve been meaning to give it to you for ages, but you’ve been so busy
and we just kept forgetting.”
“That’s right!” Mom said, hopping off her stool. “I’ll go get it.”
I blew my nose in the Kleenex and bunched it in my hands. “What is it?”
Joanne beamed as she brought the teapot and cups to the island. She set everything down and continued to grin as we waited for Mom to return.
She was carrying a box wrapped in glittery green paper when she returned. She smiled as broadly as Joanne as she shoved it into my hands.
“
It’s your Christmas present from us,” she said.
Frowning at them warily, I turned to the island and tore off the paper. I gasped.
“What…?”
“Surprise!” Mom and Joanne shouted simultaneously.
“Do you like it?” Mom asked. “The guy at the kiosk swore it was the one all the kids wanted.”
I didn’t know what to say. It was beautiful.
“I love it!” I said at last. “Thank you so much.”
I put my brand new phone down on the counter and hurried to embrace them.
“You have unlimited texting, but it’s only free for talk after six,” Mom said.
I shook my head, staring at the sleek, black device. “It’s perfect.”
“Try it!” Joanne squeaked, looking as excited as I felt.
They exchanged delighted glances as I hopped off the stool and hurried up to my room. I threw myself on the bed and tore open the packaging. The phone was slim and lightweight in my grasp.
I texted Adam with my number and a whole lot of exclamation marks. I got an almost immediate response back, telling me how excited he was for me. A light knock sounded on the door, interrupting my moment of giddy happiness. Joanne poked her head inside and smiled at me.
“Hey.” She slipped into the room. “How do you like it?” she asked, jerking her chin towards the phone.
“I think it would be more fun if I had more than one person to text,” I admitted sheepishly.
“You could text your dad and Dallas,” she reminded me.
I just nodded.
She shuffled across the room and perched on the edge of my bed.
‘How are you … really?”
I shrugged.
“I wish she would talk to me. I just want to know if she’s okay. The stuff that’s been happening at school … I’m scared for her. Someone is really trying to hurt her.”
Joanne nodded, her face somber. “
Your mother and I will contact the principal and her parents. We’ll see what we can do to help.”
But it wasn’t enough. The person responsible needed to be caught and punished.
I just had no idea how to accomplish that without donning a cap and tights. Even then, I wasn’t coordinated enough to pull off being a superhero.
“Do you think I should talk to her parents?” I asked.
“No,” Joanne murmured. “Let us handle that, okay? You just figure out what you’re going to do.”
I
missed the days when my biggest concern was whether or not to do those extra chapters in my textbooks. Doing Algebra seemed a whole lot easier than the task assigned to me.
Adam
I ignored the buzz of my phone in my pocket. I had a feeling it was Kenny and I wasn’t in the mood. I had bigger problems.
“Why
didn’t you tell us someone was attacking you?” Mom exclaimed for the third time to a stubborn and pissed off Vanessa.
“
This is very serious,” Dad added.
“Why would you keep this a secret?” Mom
continued.
It was the same questions over and over again. I personally didn’t understand why they kept asking
them. She hadn’t said a word since they got home and dragged her downstairs for a family meeting. Yet they kept pushing at her. I knew she could sit there for hours in that defiant, mute silence. She was very good at it.
“Vanessa, say something!” Mom pleaded. “Why can’t you see how afraid we are for you?”
Vanessa laughed, the first real sound she’d made in hours. “Afraid for me or afraid of what this will do for your business, because I didn’t see a whole lot of concern for me when you turned your backs on me.”
Mom gasped. “We have never turned our backs on you, Vanessa. We have always been here to support—”
“To support what you want from us. To support an endless parade of clubs and activities so you don’t have to be parents. That sort of support?”
“Watch your tone!” Dad growled.
Van ignored him. “It’s easy to pretend you’re good parents when you’re never home. You lock yourselves up in that stupid office and have no idea what we go through. You don’t care.”
“That’s enough.” Dad shot to his feet. “I won’t listen to this. We pay good money to make sure you guys have the best—”
“The best of what? An empty house? Tireless hours of dance and piano that I never wanted? The only time we see you is on Christmas.
Only
Christmas and even then, you treat me like I’m some dog you picked up off the side of the road because I don’t fit your mold. Well, I will never be what you want. I would rather die.”
The muscle in Dad’s jaw flexed as he stared at Vanessa. Mom looked horrified.
“You really hate us that much?”
The smile that curled Vanessa’s mouth was bitter and as sharp as the edge of a razor. But tears spilled down her face.
“Yes. I hate you.”
I could see the slash of hurt twist across Mom’s face before she looked away and rose to her feet. She smoothed shaky hands down her skirt.
“We’re your family, Vanessa. As much as you may wish we weren’t, we are. We will do everything we can to make this stop—”
“Don’t do me any favors.” Vanessa got to her feet, hands balls of anger at her sides. “I didn’t need you
the day they kicked me out of Vina and I don’t need you now. Why don’t you just go back to your precious office and your precious son who you worship like a god?”
“How dare you!” Dad’s face pulsed a violent and disturbing shade of red. “You ungrateful little—”
Mom took his arm and dragged him from the room without a word. I watched them go before turning to my sister.
“
What is your problem?” I asked, genuinely curious. “What have any of us ever done to you?”
She laughed. “That’s just it, big brother. You have done nothing but make my life hell. You have taken everything from me. You made me this person.”
I shook my head. “No, I didn’t. You could have had everything—”
“If what? If I
was a sheep like you, Adam? If I groveled at their feet for every little scrap they could see fit to throw my way? I have pride.”
“That’s all you have,” I murmured. “You’ve managed to push away everyone
who cares about you.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Let me guess, you’re talking about Kia.”
I nodded, not bothering to deny it. “Yes, but also Mom and Dad and me.”
“I would st
ill have Kia if you could for once keep your hands off what isn’t yours. You already took Mom and Dad and Taylor. I suppose it was only a matter of time before you took Kia, too. You could never stand to see me happy.”
I frowned. “Do you hear yourself? Do you hear how crazy you sound? Jesus, Vanessa. This isn’t a
conspiracy. No one is out to get you. Kia is probably one of the most loyal people I have ever met in my life. She would have gone to hell and back for you. She still probably would. But you’re so consumed by your hate that you don’t see that.”
“Oh for
God’s sake Adam. Shut up. Don’t lecture me on morality when you have none.”
I threw up my hands. “Fine. You win. You’re completely alone.
How does it feel?”
More tears rained down her cheeks, but she kept smiling. “Like my life.”