Risk Taker (8 page)

“Do you ever get some time off?” Ethan wondered, seeing the anger and frustration in her blue eyes. He felt bad, knowing his curiosity had dredged up a very unhappy childhood for Sarah.

“We’re two pilots short. We’re all working every day.”

“At least you got four days of rest,” he murmured, searching her closed expression.

“Yeah, I should thank that bastard for that. At least I got four days of solid, deep sleep.”

Hearing the derision in her husky tone, he said, “I was wondering because I work with an NGO run by an Afghan Apache pilot. Captain Khalid Shaheen is the first Afghan to be trained to fly an Apache for the Army. His wife, Emma, an American who used to be an Apache pilot, helps him with their charity along the border villages. They bring in educational supplies, desks, books and teachers. Plus, they bring in donated American clothing to the children. I work with them off and on, when I can. We’re always on patrols or missions in a lot of these border village areas, and I see the poverty. In one village the kids were barefoot. Every one of them. I contacted Khalid, and he has gathered about a hundred pair of children’s shoes at his villa outside Kabul and he’s waiting for me to arrange a pickup and distribution for them.”

Deeply touched, Sarah said, “That’s very nice of you to do that.”

“I hate to see these kids suffer so much,” Ethan admitted. “I grew up in a happy family with two other brothers and a sister. After my dad retired from the Navy, he bought a small ranch in Texas. Looking back on my childhood, I never wanted for anything.”

“You were lucky,” Sarah said. She could see it in the strength of his face, his calm demeanor. Ethan wasn’t like her: reactive, getting angry very quickly over situations where weaker human beings were being taken advantage of by higher ups. Or disempowered, as she had been. “Listen, I’ll see what I can do. We’ve got extra Black Hawks here, just no pilots to fly them. Maybe my CO will let me fly a humanitarian mission for you. I can try. No guarantees.”

He smiled a little. “Somehow, Sarah, I think you get your way when you want it.”

“I don’t take the word
no
very well, Ethan. But maybe you’ve noticed that already.”

Chapter 8

S
arah felt her heart beat a little more strongly when she saw the white envelope waiting for her when she woke up at 0500. No longer did she try and tell herself it was a trick. Soon, she would ask Ethan and confront him about being the poet. She opened it, anxious to read what he’d penned to her this time.

And it is yet possible that even you could not glimpse the full spectrum of your mellifluous self,

Since you are a multilayered being

Of unrestrained rapture and passion.

(to be continued as poet can find time)

Warmth flowed through her, opening her heart once more. Sarah felt the words reverberate sweetly through her. Ethan saw deeply into her. She sighed. His words were beautiful. Accurate. She was a passionate person on a mission. Her whole existence was predicated on saving lives. It was almost an obsession, driving her. Sarah felt she had survived her past to turn around and rescue those who were vulnerable and unable to defend themselves.

The words this morning felt so right to Sarah. She knew she was going into the lion’s den when ordered over to Major Donaldson’s office at 0800 when her shift ended. Her passion to protect and defend life was her armor. Her reason for being. And she was damned if this man, her CO, was going to strip her of it.

* * *

“At ease, Chief Benson,” Major Donaldson said. He scowled up at her.

Sarah was in a clean flight uniform; she took an at-ease position in front of his desk, keeping her face unreadable. He drummed his fingers on the desk, staring hard at her. Her gaze settled on something above his head, looking at the wall behind him. Sarah knew that infuriated him. He preferred eye contact.

“I gave you a direct order yesterday on the way to that medevac mission to stop and wait.”

“I didn’t hear your order, sir.” Sarah kept her voice even, noncombative, although every cell in her body was on guard and ready to go into battle with this officer. Her heart rate picked up because she saw the anger in Donaldson’s close-set eyes. It turned her stomach. She saw Bill Caldwell’s thin, unshaven face instead.

“You said there was faulty communication? It was fine on my end, Chief Benson.”

“Wasn’t on mine, sir. I don’t know if you heard me request for you to repeat your message?” She refused to look into his eyes, feeling her entire body begin to shrink inside her flight uniform. It always happened when she felt a predatory male presence.

“Dammit, I ordered you to stand down on that flight!”

Coolly, Sarah lowered her gaze and stared hard at him. “Sir, I had authorization from the Marine lieutenant on the ground. Marine Corps HQ at Bagram. I had authorization from SEAL HQ here at Camp Bravo, and you gave me authorization. I followed procedures. All military branches involved in the medevac mission were contacted, brought up to speed on the nature of the mission and I received the order to proceed.” She lowered her voice. “It was the call of the men on that hill to make and it was left up to me, as the pilot commander on that mission, to make the decision to go or no go.” Her nostrils flared. “I decided to go.”

“Yes,” Donaldson growled. “And now I have to spend budget money I don’t have in order to replace the Plexiglas cockpit windshield on your helicopter. Not to mention the four bullet holes that have torn up the fuselage cabin of that helicopter. That costs money, Chief Benson, in case you forgot.”

Her anger spiraled, and she glared across the desk at the hard-set major’s face. “Sir, with all due respect, I had authorization. I did not disobey any direct order. I can’t help it if our digital radio went on the fritz. It’s computers and software. We were in a lot of turbulence flying to that rescue. Everything was being bounced around. You know yourself that computers can’t always take a beating.”

He studied her in the silence.

Sarah knew she was right. She’d been in the military too long not to know how to play the game. He could play games, too.

“You’re a risk taker, Chief Benson. And that’s a problem. You’re like a pit bull when it comes to a mission, never using common sense when it’s required. That hill was being overrun. You should have backed off and waited until it was secured.”

Eyes blazing, Sarah bit out, “Sir, I’m a medevac pilot for a reason. Men’s lives depend upon me and my crew getting there as fast as possible. I couldn’t care less how much lead is coming our way. As long as I judge the situation as safe enough, that my crew isn’t in jeopardy, I’m going in.” Her voice turned steely. “I won’t
ever
leave a person to bleed out when me and my crew can make the difference,
sir.
”

Sarah understood that Donaldson couldn’t bring her up on charges. He had given her initial authorization to fly into that hill situation. And if he tried to hang her on the second order to stand down and wait, she’d get a lawyer, go to trial against him and have Bagram’s authorization to trump the major’s second order that she’d disobeyed. And then his ass would be on the line and he could kiss his colonel’s leaves goodbye.

“Well, Chief Benson, besides being on the flight rotation, your day off that was coming due tomorrow is canceled. You are going to be available as a free-floating pilot that someone else here on base might need tomorrow. You’re on standby.”

Sarah almost smiled. She had just such a flight in mind. “Yes, sir.”

“Dismissed.”

* * *

Ethan was surprised when he saw Sarah show up at SEAL HQ at 0900. She’d wandered into the compound and asked for him. Beau, one of the SEAL shooters, had brought her to where he was, inside working on another mission in the big room.

“Hey,” he said, standing when he saw Sarah, obviously distressed. Ethan pulled out a stool from beneath the planning desk and gestured for her to sit down. He noticed Beau grinning. Let him think what he wanted.

“Hi,” Sarah said. She took off her green baseball cap and stuffed it in her large thigh pocket. “I didn’t know how to call you guys, so I hope it’s okay that I just ambled over here for a face-to-face?”

“Sure, no problem. Would you like some coffee?” He gestured to the small table in the corner with a pot on a hot plate.

“No, thanks.” Sarah pushed her fingers through the loose hair that fell around her shoulders. “Never been in SEALdom,” she said, looking around the huge room. Sarah saw an older man come out of his office and give her a quick perusal. And then he turned and went back into his office.

“Yeah, this is Grand Central Station,” Ethan joked, sitting down and facing her. “How did the talk with the major go this morning?” Ethan had been concerned for her sake, having seen her in action. He was sure some COs would tear their hair out over Sarah’s boldness.

“Well.” She sighed, resting her hands on her thighs. “It’s good news for you.”

“Oh?”

“My CO is pissed off at me, so he’s taking my day off tomorrow and assigning me to standby flight status. That means as a pilot, me and my Black Hawk are at anyone’s disposal.” That same tug-of-war went on inside her. She wanted to be with Ethan. And yet Donaldson had just given her a warning. She had to keep her head in the game. “Do you have tomorrow free so we can take those shoes to the kids in that village? If you do, I need to write up a flight plan so the major can sign off on it and then get it over to Ops, so I can be assigned a bird.”

Surprised, Ethan considered her request. Sarah’s eyes were clear, and he could see the feistiness was back in them. She didn’t look any worse for wear after confronting the major. A slow smile tipped the corners of his mouth. “So, the major is punishing you for doing the right thing?”

“It’s in his DNA,” Sarah muttered defiantly. “Oh, and more good news. I called Bagram earlier and those two Marines survived. Both are being transferred to Landstuhl Medical Center in Germany shortly.”

He couldn’t help but grin. “That makes my day.” And it did. Two families who were on tenterhooks, knowing their loved ones had been wounded, would now be informed they were not only going to live, but make recovery.

“Yeah, did mine, too.” Sarah pushed her hair away from her cheek, holding his gaze. Just being around Ethan lifted her spirits. “So? I’m offering you me and my helo. Are you going to take advantage of it or not?”

Ethan grimaced. “I don’t know. I’ll have to talk to our chief. He runs the platoon and only he can give me orders to take a day off. I’ll ask him a little later.”

He pointed to the papers beneath his elbow. “Right now, I’m in the middle of planning an op for an upcoming mission and the chief’s expecting it yesterday.”

She raised one brow and nodded. “It’s the same everywhere, isn’t it?”

Ethan gave her a half smile. “Yeah, I guess it is.” He looked at his Rolex. “How about I meet you at noon over at the chow hall? I should know what’s up the master chief’s sleeve by then and I can let you know his decision.”

Ethan wanted any excuse to spend time with Sarah. Her eyes turned warm, her cheeks flushed and he sensed her happiness even though she wasn’t smiling. Sarah was a complex person with a lot of depth and secrets.

Yesterday’s talk had made him feel like a jerk. He hadn’t wanted to see the tortured look on her face as she’d recounted her painful childhood. Somehow, Ethan wanted to make it up to her. And he sure as hell wasn’t going to ask her any more personal questions for a while. She deserved happiness, not going into that vat of misery again. He could see her seriously thinking about his request.

Sarah slid off the stool, leaned down and retrieved her baseball cap. Straightening, she asked, “I’ll see you then?” She put the cap on, drawing the bill down until it was almost level with her eyes. She felt a thrill move through her as she looked at Ethan.

“I’ll see you out,” Ethan said, gesturing toward the door. He was walking on air but keeping his game face on.

Sarah had already chosen the last table against the wall and gone through the chow line when she saw Ethan arrive. He spotted her immediately out of hundreds of people. Amazed, she nodded toward him, letting him know she saw him, too. Of all the black ops types presently in the chow hall, Ethan stood out. Sarah wasn’t sure why. Maybe because he was so tall? His solid confidence? Or maybe the weapons he carried? He was the only man with a SOG SEAL knife in a sheath on his lower left calf and a drop holster on his right thigh with a SIG Sauer 9 mm pistol in it. That SIG was a calling card to everyone that he was a SEAL.

She enjoyed watching him. His movements were economical and fluid, his body honed into a male version of gracefulness.

As she sat there, her entire body began to come to life, as if hidden coals of feminine hunger were awakening, blazing brightly within her. Ethan’s maleness, his rock-solid self-assurance, turned her on. It didn’t hurt he was damn good-looking even though, like all black ops types, he wore a beard. They had to in order to blend in with the Muslim male population.

Ethan smiled at her as he took the bench so his back would be against the wall. That way, he could see the entrance and exit points in the building and observe what was going on. SEALs did not like to be caught off guard. “Sorry I’m late. Last-minute stuff I had to talk over with Master Chief Gil Hunter.” He sat down. His tray was piled high with carbs and protein.

“No worries,” Sarah assured him. “I have some bad news for you. My CO isn’t going to let me land, stay behind and help off-load those shoes for your kids in that village. I can only drop you and the shoes off and then I have to leave. I can come back and pick you up when you make the call.”

He saw she was bummed out. “You have a copilot, but it requires both of you in order to fly that bird.”

“Don’t go there. I want this to be an enjoyable lunch. Okay?”

His mouth twitched as he picked up a slice of bread and buttered it. “Fair enough. I have good news. The master chief is willing to give me the day off. He says it’s a good nation-building exercise.” He saw the dejection in her eyes. “You know, SEALs are famous for doing work-arounds? If we get stopped from doing something one way, we just figure out another way to accomplish it.”

Sarah watched him dig into the chicken parmesan on his tray. Ethan had three chicken breasts piled high. Sarah knew the heat and long missions for any black ops men were brutal. They burned up thousands of calories in a day, she was once told by a Special Forces captain. “Okay,” she offered, confused. “What does thinking outside the box have to do with me and my predicament?”

Grinning, Ethan said between bites, “I’ll make a call to Captain Shaheen. Tell him the situation and suggest he call your major and ask for a free-floating pilot. His NGO owns two CH-47s. If he can get your major to let you fly one, then he shouldn’t have a problem with it. That way—” his eyes gleamed “—you can fly in with us from Bravo to the village.”

“I am CH-47 qualified,” Sarah told him, excitement rising in her. Then she frowned. “But Captain Shaheen doesn’t want that bird on the ground any longer than necessary, either.”

“His wife, Emma, is the other pilot. She can drop you and me off at the village and fly in later and pick us up.” Ethan liked the idea of having an entire day with Sarah. A slight glint flared in her eyes.

“If you can pull this off, Ethan, I’m good to go. I love kids. It would be nice to be among them.” And it would. Sarah doted on children with good reason. She told herself she wanted to do this just for the children. And knew she was lying in part, because she also wanted to be around Ethan.

“I’ll make it work,” he gloated, meeting her tentative smile. He motioned to her tray. “Are you not hungry?”

Sarah picked up her fork, a feeling of tension washing through her. “A little.” Ethan was easy to be around. He didn’t threaten her. “It’s your turn,” she told him with a dark look.

“To do what?”

“To tell me about your childhood. It sounded wonderful from what little you shared with me yesterday.”

“Yeah,” he said, shrugging. “I was born in Anchorage, Alaska, where my dad, who was in the Navy, was stationed. After he retired, he bought a small ranch in Texas. My mother, Rose, is a grade school teacher. Me and my two brothers and sister were raised to work hard and play hard.”