Rock Chick 01 (24 page)

In two strides, Hank was on him, his hand at
The Kevster’s throat holding him against the wall.

“Hank, it’s okay, that’s Kevin,” I said.

Hank turned to me, then looked beyond me and
said, “Jesus fucking Christ.”

Ally was also in and she was staring behind
me and then she tipped back her head and laughed.

I turned and saw that The Kevster’s living
room was filled with pot plants. Every surface was covered with
plants, and that included the floor. There was a narrow path forged
through the plants but other than that, it was wall-to-wall
marijuana. It was a pot jungle.

“Holy crap,” I said.

“Gulk,” The Kevster said.

“Hank, let him go,” Ally said.

Hank’s hand loosened at Kevin’s throat and
his other hand went to the small of his back. He was wearing jeans,
boots and a gray t-shirt that fit snug on the shoulders and chest
but sat loose at his waist. He pulled up the back of his tee and
exposed a gun tucked into his waistband next to a pair of cuffs. He
pulled out the cuffs and slapped a bracelet on Kevin, then he
yanked him toward a door and slapped the other bracelet on the
doorknob.

Kevin was coughing and explaining at the same
time.

“Dude! I had to save the plants! They were
dyin’. They didn’t do anything wrong, they’re innocent. Rosie left
them to die.
Someone
had to save the plants.”

Hank ignored Rosie and turned to me.

“I want to talk to you,” he said.

He stalked through the pot path and I
followed him into Kevin’s kitchen, which was also filled with pot
plants.

Hank glanced around and then turned on
me.

“What in
the
fuck?” he asked.

“How’m I supposed to know what the fuck? I
thought he was calling about Pepper Rick, the guy who kidnapped me.
I didn’t know anything about this.”

Hank stared at me for a beat and then looked
to the ceiling.

“What’re you gonna do?” I asked.

“I’m callin’ it in,” he answered in a
no-nonsense cop tone.

Uh-oh.

“Can we take the plants back to Rosie’s first
and call it in from there?”

Hank stared at me incredulously, as if I’d
just asked for permission to run the world and make every Tuesday
International Pink Champagne Day.

I guessed that was not going to happen.

“Okay then, can the police take the plants
and leave Kevin? They aren’t his plants, he’s just looking after
them as a concerned environmentalist.”

Hank put his hands to his hips.

I sucked some air into my nostrils and then
let it out. “How much trouble is he in?”

“Indy, do you have any idea how much this
shit is worth?”

I looked around. I’d seen pot, I’d been
around people smoking pot, I’d even shared a few joints myself in
my wild past, but I had no idea.

“Uh, no,” I answered.

“He’s in a lot of trouble.”

I was afraid of that.

We followed the pot path back to Ally and The
Kevster. The Kevster looked freaked. Ally had clearly cottoned on
to the seriousness of the matter.

“What are you gonna do?” she asked Hank.

He walked right by her and out the door,
pulling out his cell.

“This isn’t good,” I said to Ally.

“Why’d you bring a cop here?” Kevin
whined.

“He’s my bodyguard, I keep getting shot at
and kidnapped,” I told him.

The Kevster stared at me, this news always
brought the same amazed look to everyone. Then again, it was
amazing.

Then Kevin said, “Tim’s dead. I heard it on
the news. Rosie fucked us all.”

This was true, quiet, little Rosie, the
Coffee Guy, had fucked us all.

“Why did you bring the plants here?” Ally
asked the million dollar question.

“Dude, I’m a pothead. This is the best pot in
Denver, in Colorado, maybe in the world. It would be a crime to let
it die. I did my duty to the pot, I pay the price. I have no
regrets,” The Kevster was getting dramatic in the face of
incarceration. I thought that was a good way to go.

“Tell me about this guy who came today.
What’d he look like?” I asked.

The Kevster shrugged. Obviously, a future of
using the toilet with an audience made scary guys seem less
scary.

“He was one that came before, but without his
partner. Dark hair with some gray, big guy. I saw him out the
window, he looked angry.”

I turned to Ally, she raised her brows and I
nodded.

Pepper Rick.

“When was he here?” Ally asked.

“This morning, it wasn’t even light yet.
Bangin’ on the door, bangin’ on the windows, shoutin’. Freaked me
out, I didn’t leave my bedroom and your card was on my fridge. I
waited for, like, ever. Then I had to pee and I grabbed your card
and the phone on my way to the bathroom. I called you after I
peed.”

That was a bit too much information.

Unfortunately, Pepper Rick was probably long
gone. I had to call Lee anyway, he was hunting and this was
information about his prey.

I walked outside and saw Hank talking to a
couple of uniforms, one was Jorge Alvarez who was soon supposed to
sit the detective exam and, according to Malcolm, would likely be
Chief of Police one day.

His partner was Carl Farrell who Ally had
made out with after an F.O.P. hog roast. Carl had a bachelor’s,
majoring in biology and political science and was now studying
forensics. Carl was tall, big, blond-haired and blue-eyed. Carl’s
hair was always a bit of a mess, Carl had a killer, dry sense of
humor and Carl had a way of looking at you like he knew what you
looked like naked. In other words, Carl was very sexy. If I hadn’t
been so hung up on Lee, Ally’d have had competition for Carl.

I waved to Jorge and Carl as they walked
inside. Jorge shook his finger at me mock-angrily. Carl grinned,
then winked as he walked by.

Hank headed toward me.

I was about to call Lee when my cell
rang.

I flipped it open.

“Hello?”

“Hello yourself, woman. You comin’ to get me,
or what?”

It was Tex.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“They’re lettin’ me out and won’t let me walk
or take a taxi.”

I thought about this. He was at Denver Health
and it was at least five miles from his house. Crazy Tex roaming
the streets whacked out on pain killers did not sound like a
peaceful afternoon for Denver.

Two more cop cars angled in, followed by a
Channel 9 News van.

Great.

The pot jungle was going to be big news.

“When are they releasing you?” I asked
Tex.

“Ten minutes ago.”

“I’ll be there as soon as I can.”

I flipped the phone shut and Hank stared at
me. “What now?”

Ally came out of the house just ahead of
Jorge, Carl and The Kevster.

Or, I should say, Ally sashayed out of the
house with a knowing smile on her face and Carl followed staring at
her ass, a knowing smile on his face too.

Another cop car angled in and Channel 7 News
jockeyed for a parking spot. Jorge tossed Hank his cuffs as he
passed us, escorting Kevin to the squad car.

“Come visit me, Rock Chicks,” Kevin shouted,
luckily not holding any grudges. “Bring brownies!”

“You take him brownies and I’ll kill you,”
Hank said.

I ignored his threat. “Do you have to stay
here?”

“No, I briefed Jorge. They have it covered.
We’ll go into the station later to give our statements.”

“Good, we have to go get Tex from the
hospital. They released him ten minutes ago and he needs a
ride.”

Hank was shaking his head again.

“We’re not goin’ to Tex’s house. There’s
strong physical evidence that suggests he has tear gas and
grenades. I don’t even want to think about what we’ll find in
his
house. I’ll have to call the ATF and those guys are
nuts.”

“Then don’t come in,” I suggested.

“Indy –”

I pulled out my trump card.

“He took a bullet for me.”

That did it.

“Lee owes me big time for this,” Hank
muttered as he walked to his SUV.

My cell rang as we pulled away from the
curb.

The display said, “Lee calling.”

“Hey, I was just gonna call you,” I said.

“The office phoned, you’re all over the
police-band.”

Oopsie.

“I kind of led Hank to a house full of pot
plants and he went all cop on me.”

Silence.

“Lee?”

“Why aren’t you at the condo?”

“Duke called, he opened the store. There was
a Mini-We-Want-Rosie Riot. We settled that and then The Kevster
called and told us someone was at his house, scaring him. I thought
it was my kidnapper, Pepper Rick and it was. That’s why I was gonna
call you because he was at Kevin’s early this morning banging on
the door. I thought you’d want to know.”

Silence again.

“Lee?”

“Where’s Hank?”

“He’s driving, we’re on our way to get Tex
and take him home. The hospital released him.”

“Let me talk to him.”

I looked at Hank. Hank looked unhappy.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”

“Why?”

“I think he’s kinda mad at you.”

“Let me get this straight, he’s supposed to
be lookin’ after you and he takes you to a house where your
kidnapper was, just hours ago, and
he’s
mad at
me
?”

Yikes.

“I guess the feeling’s mutual.”

More silence.

“I kinda talked him into it.”

“Yeah, I suspect you’re good at that.”

“If it makes you feel better, he’s already
threatened to kill me.”

I heard the sigh before, “Be safe, for
Christ’s sake.”

Then he hung up.

When Hank swung in the SUV, Tex was at the
Emergency Room entrance, sitting in a wheelchair, his arm in a
tight sling, a stocky guy in scrubs and clogs standing behind
him.

Tex pushed himself out of the chair as we
walked up to him and he shot a filthy look at the guy in
scrubs.

“Fuckin’ wheelchairs. Fuckin’ orderlies,” Tex
groused.

“I’m not an orderly, I’m a nursing
assistant,” Clog Guy said and from the look of him, there was no
way I’d disagree. He could be anything he wanted.

“Whatever,” Tex muttered and his eyes settled
on me. “What’d I miss?”

I ran it down for him with a little more
detail than what I did for Lee, the riot, Kumar’s prehistoric
mother-in-law, the Kevster call, kidnapper sighting, pot plants,
police and two news vans.

“Fuckin’ A, darlin’,” he said to me.

“Fuckin’ A,” I replied, “now what?”

Tex lumbered to the SUV. “Now, we feed the
cats.”

Pandemonium at the Gay Bar

We went to Tex’s house, he changed clothes
and we fed his gazillion cats and cleaned out five litter trays. It
wasn’t the most pleasant job I’d ever done in my life but the
kitties were appreciative. Tex made us stay long enough to give
them cuddles, dangle feathers and jiggle laser lights because,
according to Tex, it was important to keep their minds and bodies
active.

Luckily, there were no stockpiles of firearms
and explosives on display.

When we started to leave, Tex followed.

Hank stopped and turned.

“Where are you goin’?” he asked Tex.

“With you,” Tex answered.

“I don’t think so,” Hank replied.

“You think
you
can protect Little Miss
Calamity here all by yourself?” Tex scoffed, jerking a thumb at
me.

Er, excuse me? Little Miss Calamity?

“You have your arm in a sling,” Hank
returned.

“Listen man, I been on this block for twenty
years without leavin’ except to go to the fuckin’ dentist when I
had a toothache in 1998. I got off it last night and for the first
time in years, I feel free.”

Hank considered this.

Hank was a tough guy but he’d always been
somewhat of a soft touch. The only fights he ever got into where
when people were teasing the unpopular kids at school or saying
shit about girls that he knew wasn’t true (these girls were usually
Ally and me). When he was a kid, he used to bring home the lame
dogs and damaged birds. I always thought that Hank got into the cop
business far less to serve than to protect.

“Lee owes me big time for this,” he repeated,
giving in.

We walked down to Kumar’s and stocked up on
junk food and got the makings for a late lunch. Then we went to the
station and gave our statements about the happenings on to The
Kevster’s pot farm. Then we went to my house.

Stevie and Tod were in the front yard mowing,
weeding and pruning. Kitty Sue was taking in the sun on my front
porch in my old, weathered butterfly chair that once had a
bright-turquoise canvass seat that was now a bluish-gray. Marianne
Meyer was sitting on my front step playing with a baby and Andrea
was chasing after a toddler who was streaking across my side of the
lawn while two more of her kids were rolling around in the grass
looking like they were trying to kill each other.

Hank parked across the street from my duplex
and we all walked up to the house. Everyone stared at Tex, for,
even without the night vision goggles, he was a sight to see.

Then Marianne’s attention focused on me.

“Well?” Marianne asked.

“Well, what?” I retorted.

Marianne threw up her hands. “Does Lee have
the bow off your panties?”

Grr.

Tod and Stevie came up, saving me from having
to answer.

“Kitty Sue told us you were kidnapped last
night,” Stevie noted with concern.

“Again,” Tod put in.

Before I could say anything, Kitty Sue called
from her chair, “Why didn’t you tell me Tod was performing tonight?
You know I like to see Burgundy do her thang.”

“What’s this about panties?” Tex broke
in.

“Do you think we could turn the hose on the
kids? It’s so hot and they’d love it,” Andrea shouted from across
the lawn, struggling to get a pair of shorts on the streaker.