Rocky Mountain Freedom (4 page)

“I’ll do what I can to help you make it happen.” He turned and caught her by the hand as she finished loading their glasses into the dishwasher. She let him tug her against his body, slipping into his arms like she was coming home. His strong fingers curled under her chin and lifted her head so their eyes met. “Last question, though. You really want to spend that much time together, darling? You did run out of here without much warning. I actually figured I’d never see you again.”

And…the moment had arrived. Ashley wasn’t going to cut him any slack, not on this topic. “Travis Coleman, you know damn well why I left, and it wasn’t anything to do with you and me.”

His entire body stiffened. He caught her by the forearms and gently separated them. “I suppose you’re right.”

Cool air surrounded her as sorrow chilled her further. “I didn’t mean to bring up old arguments. I think you and I can work together fine.”

“Nothing but business, is that what you’re saying you want?”

It wasn’t, not by a long shot, but the ball was in his court at the moment. If he wanted to continue to ignore the suggestions she’d made so many months ago, it was his life. “If that’s how
you
want it. Whatever works for you.”

Travis kissed her forehead before pacing across the living room and picking up the remote. He clicked on the TV and settled on the couch without so much as a glance her way. “You give me a call when you’re ready to start.”

So. It was going to be like that. All business.

Ashley took a deep breath. “I’ll be ready to go in the morning. May as well get started.”

He stared at the screen as he flipped channels. “Six a.m. Show up here, and you can ride with me.”

He was probably hoping to trigger a few emotions with his attitude and actions, but frankly she was more amused than pissed off. He was deliberately being an asshole? Fine by her. She had no intention of getting caught in any game she couldn’t win, so until she figured out her strategy, pretending he’d chased her away was as good a solution as any.

She didn’t bother to say goodbye. She grabbed her coat and let herself out. Maybe after a good night’s sleep she’d know better how to deal with the stubborn-as-a-jackass Travis Coleman.

Chapter Two

He forced himself to stay seated until her van door slammed shut.

Pig-headed, fucked-up shit that he was.

Once he knew for sure she was leaving, he was on his feet and watching out the window as she slowly backed up and got her van onto the gravel, headed west.

She was right. The trouble hadn’t been between the two of them. The trouble had been all his, and no matter how much she insisted on listing solutions, there
were
no easy answers.

It was better she admitted that right off the bat.

And yet as her taillights moved away from his trailer, he couldn’t help but wonder if he was being an idiot. Ashley was fire and ice. A goddess in and out of the sheets, with a
live it to the limit
attitude one hundred percent of the time. They had fit, goddamn it. Fit in a way that he’d never had with anyone else. When he was with her, he’d been incredibly happy.

Except for one wretched urge.

If he shoved that broken part of him into the hole it deserved, he could happily spend his time with the woman who loved as hard as she played.

So why hadn’t he tried sweet-talking Ashley into spending the night? She would have stayed. He was certain of it. He was still staring when she hit the four-way stop. Instead of turning left into town, she headed right. The only thing down that road was a dead-end at the creek, and she knew it.

He killed the television and paced the living room, monitoring the crossroads closely to see if she turned around and came back. The wait gave him plenty of time to fight with his demons and decide he’d been an idiot to simply let her walk out of the house.

When she hadn’t returned within thirty minutes, Travis gave in. He figured he knew her enough, knew himself. He grabbed his hat and coat and was out the door, starting up the ATV and going round the back way, across the fields.

He parked at the final fence post, not bothering to manhandle the gate open. Just left the trike there and jumped the stile. He followed the creek, winter leaves and deadfall crackling underfoot as he moved. The frogs in the stream stilled as he approached, resuming their courting songs before he’d passed more than a few steps away.

The bright rainbow colours of her van shone through the trees, and he smiled. Yeah, she hadn’t gone far. He should have known she wouldn’t bother getting a hotel room somewhere in Rocky when she was driving that beast of hers.

Before he’d stepped from the trees, he’d already heard the sound of guitar strings, soft and low, merging with the trickle of the creek. The scent of wood smoke was the final touch, and damn if he didn’t have a knot in his throat. Familiar memories. Good memories.

She had the van side door open wide, and tiny prayer flags hanging along the opening flapped in the light breeze. A few feet away Ashley sat in a folding lawn chair beside a portable hibachi. She’d built a small fire in the raised metal bowl, a waft of smoke rising and curling around the rustic campsite.

He walked as carefully as he could over the spring-moistened leaves, but they still crunched an announcement. She lifted her face toward him, a far more welcoming smile greeting him than he deserved after being a jerk back in his trailer.

Her fingers didn’t falter on the strings. “You come to give me hell for trespassing?”

“More like hell for not inviting me to join you.” Travis stepped closer to the makeshift campsite. He spotted a second lawn chair leaning against the wheel well, and unfolded it, settling himself next to her to listen to the music and the sounds of the water.

Ashley ignored him, staring instead into the trees sheltering them, spring buds trembling in the breeze. Above them, the azure sky faded before changing to the purple tones of dusk.

Travis slowed his breathing as he mentally ran through all the reasons this was a bad idea, but the same damn conclusion kept returning time and again.

He didn’t want to hurt her, but damn it, he
wanted
her.

She finally put the guitar aside, leaning it against a stump she’d dragged over to use as a side table. She stirred the coals with a small chunk of two-by-four then laid the piece of scrap lumber on the glowing embers. Dusky red flames slowly licked the soft white wood.

Tendrils of heat slipped over his body as well—burning him with a need that only she could quench.

“Invite me to stay the night, Ashley.” He caught her gaze over the fire and refused to look away.

He couldn’t stop his hunger from tingeing his words, curling around them both in imitation of the thin blue-grey line of smoke rising from the wood. His craving was more in line with the red-hot coals glowing in the bottom of her makeshift fire pit.

She lowered her voice, whispering softly like an echo of the running water. “I don’t want to see you dead.”

They were the same words she’d spoken so long ago, but maybe because he’d gone without her for four months he was more willing to listen. She’d had only one damn request back before things had gone to hell. One ultimatum.

After all this time he still didn’t have a solution. “I don’t want to be dead either.”

Suspicion stained her next question. “Are you going to stop fighting like I asked? Find some other way to deal with the…needs…you get?”

Fuck it all. “I can’t promise that.”

She sighed, once again avoiding his gaze. “Then the answer is no. We’ll hang out together around the ranch, but I’m not fooling around with you, or doing anything else.”

She picked up the guitar, and this time the tune drifting from under her fingers wasn’t light and relaxed, but discordant and edgy. As if she was playing her mood on the strings.

Dammit. “You’re serious.”

She tilted her head, and her hair fell in waves around her shoulders. His body tightened as he looked her over, admiring the soft curves he knew so intimately.

The determination in her expression was new. The touch of pain in the depths of her eyes. She’d always been stubborn, and willful, and hot-tempered, but this was more like a solid wall he wasn’t going to be able to climb. Miles from the light and happy-go-lucky woman he’d spent time with in the past.

“Travis, I
can’t
. I still want to have fun and enjoy life, but I promised myself I wouldn’t fall back into the same old habits. I’m changing for reasons that are important to me. So, do I want to spend time with you? Hell, yes, but not if it means there’s a chance I’ll have to go identify your cold, dead body when a situation gets away from you. I can’t…I can’t take the thought of that. And I won’t.”

“But you have no problem shadowing me all hours of the day and night for the coming months.”

Her fingers crushed the guitar strings and the tuneless
twang
scraped his nerves. “If you want to change your mind and tell me no, I’ll understand.”

“That simple, huh? You’ll find someone else.” Travis fought to keep his anger from building. She wasn’t saying anything ridiculous, only not what he wanted to hear.

She laughed softly, the music resuming—this time a far more melodious refrain. “Life’s pretty simple when you come down to it, Travis. We do things to make ourselves happy. We try our best. When situations change, we change with them. I want to use you and the Six Pack ranch as my models, but if you say no, then I’ll look elsewhere.”

Nothing was simple. “You make it sound like I’m being childish.”

“Never said that.”

Travis rose to his feet, frustration poking him hard. Only what he’d seen played out in his family over the past few months kept his lips sealed before he said something he’d regret. It’d been all too clear what hastily blurted words could do to a relationship as he’d watched one of his younger brothers cut himself off.

She’d mentioned wanting to move in a new direction, and he could appreciate that. He wanted the same thing, but damn, pulling back on the issue of them as a couple was going to kill him.

He took a few steps away before forcing himself to speak softly. “I want to help you. Come by a little earlier in the morning, and you can have breakfast with me. Use the shower if you’d like. I promise to keep my hands off.”

“I appreciate it. Night, Travis.”

The rosy glow of the fire shone on her pale skin, turning her into a kind of pixie or goddess of the flames. He turned his back and walked away.

Because that was all he could do.

Her throat tightened as Travis left, but in the middle of her sorrow she was happy, in a kind of far-too-grown-up way.

It hurt to turn him down, but it hurt less than losing him would. The ache in her heart was still fresh and raw, and she stared into the fire and soaked in its warmth until she could push the pain aside.

Ashley settled her junk back into her van for the night. She’d taken out the front passenger seat and turned the area into storage for her guitar and a small plastic dresser for her clothes, leaving her enough room in the back for a mattress, a tiny kitchen and her computer.

With a set of solar panels on the roof to charge her batteries, and a small portable toilet for emergencies, she was totally independent—high-tech, low-tech camping at its finest.

Except for the shower. She’d take Travis up on that offer happily.

Crazy birdsong woke her. Ashley pulled on sturdy jeans and yanked her hair back into a ponytail, shoving it under a wide-brimmed hat she’d picked up at a market in California.

The scent of eggs and coffee made her stomach rumble as she knocked on his door at five thirty sharp.

“It’s open,” he called.

Ashley stepped in, the warmth from the wood stove enveloping her like a morning hug. “Hey, Travis. I brought some muffins to add to breakfast.”

“Sounds good.” He nodded toward the table. “If you hurry, you can shower before it’s ready. You got about ten minutes.”

“That’s all I need. Thanks.”

She scooted down the hall and washed up quickly, far too comfortable in his home. And yet—the familiarity wasn’t a bad thing. They had a past, there was no denying that.

It was the future she wasn’t so sure about.

Fed, watered and wrapped up warm against the weather, Ashley climbed on the ATV behind Travis, slipping her arms around his torso. She settled her camera bag against her back. Tightened her hat straps under her chin. “Where we headed first?”

“Barns. I need to find out what’s been happening all night.” He got them moving, the soft sounds of nature eaten up under the ATV motor. “If there were a lot of calves born, then the regular chores need doing first. If it was slow, Blake will already have everything done and we might be headed into the fields.”

“Sounds fine to me.” They rolled over a hill and the wind struck them, far colder than it had been in the creek-side ravine. “Damn, that’s a nasty wind.”

“Still April. We could have snow next week.”

“God, don’t remind me.” She rested her chin on his shoulder to hear him better as they raced forward, the ATV engine rumbling over their voices. “I enjoyed my time in California, especially being there during the cold snap that usually hits here in January.”