RUIN (The RUIN Series Book 1) (3 page)

"I thought we'd go back to my place."

His hand snakes around my waist as the words leave his lips. We've been in this club for more than an hour and my plan to distract Doug with the numerous women all bumping and grinding against him hasn't worked at all. He's still hell bent on taking me back to his apartment.

"This is so fun," I lie through clenched teeth. This is not fun at all. I have to be at work at eight in the morning. I'm tired. I'm aggravated and I'm sick of feeling Doug's hands pawing all over my semi expensive dress.

His breath feels hot over my neck. "We'd have more fun if were alone. I'd love to screw you."

You'd love to screw me? Aren't you a gentleman? Images of a quick few thrusts before he passes out on top of me flash across my mind.

"You should dance." I point towards a group of women gathered on the dance floor. They came to get fucked, or in Doug's case screwed by a teacher. "Get out there."

"Nah." His hand moves higher racing over the bottom of my breast. "Let's go."

"I'm not going home with you." I take a step forward. "It's not happening."

He's around me in an instant, his hands latching tightly to my hips. "I'm not asking for anything but a roll in the hay."

An actual, literal roll in the hay would likely feel better than climbing all over his hot, sweaty body at this point. "You're a nice guy but I'm not interested."

"Why not?" he snaps. "What's wrong with me?"

It's a question that deserves an honest answer. I don’t have one. It's not that he's not attractive. Many women would chase after him in a heartbeat. It's not that sex with him wouldn't be fun. It might actually be better than I'm envisioning. It's just that there's nothing there. I feel absolutely no draw towards him. Jumping into bed for the sake of feeling wanted isn't something I can do anymore.

"There's nothing wrong with you," I say assuredly. "You're great. I'm just not ready yet."

"Is it because of a break up?" His bottom lip juts out in a frown. "Did you dump your boyfriend?"

I glance into his eyes and see a flash of understanding. "Something like that," I offer back. It's semantics at this point. It doesn't matter whether Parker dumped me or I dumped him. What matters is that it's over.

"That's killer." His hand darts to his chest. "My girlfriend dumped me for another guy last year. I'm still getting over it."

Who knew? Who knew that we shared a similar pain?

"Does it get easier?" I lean in closer. "Does the pain go away?"

He nods as his hand races to my arm. "Every day it gets better."

I want to believe him. I do believe him. I feel better today than I felt when I first stepped off the plane weeks ago.

"So?" The words hold way too much expectation. "My place?"

I brush my lips softly across his cheek before taking a step back. "Not a chance."

***

I exit the club onto the street and into the late, cool evening air. I shiver slightly wishing I had thought far enough ahead to grab a sweater before I left Alexa's apartment hours ago. My eyes scan the scene outside the club. It's near midnight now and the throngs of people waiting in line to get inside have only increased. The hum of their voices as they mingle and connect before ever hitting the dance floor wafts through the air. I don't know how I'm going to jump back into that. I'll need to at some point. Meeting men in Manhattan isn't as easy as it looks.

"Kayla?"

The voice that calls my name is rough and deep. It's not Doug. This voice carries more confidence. I whip around on my heel, my eyes scanning over the crowd behind me. I don't recognize any of the faces.

"Kayla." It calls to me again, louder this time.  A hand juts above a group of people standing near the entrance to the club.

I step towards the voice trying desperately to place it. I briefly dated a few men before I moved back to Boston. Right now, I can't recall any of them. Please let it be someone from work.

He steps forward, the crowd parting to let him through. I notice her first. She's a beautiful brunette, slightly taller than I am, her hand clenched tightly in his. She's wearing a fitted red dress, the neckline so low that her cleavage is on display. Her lipstick is bold. It matches the hue of the dress. She flashes a set of perfect white teeth before her gaze travels up to his face.

"Ben," I say his name for the first time.

He leans forward to brush his lips over my cheek. "It's great to see you."

I step back out of sheer need. My body aches just from the soft touch of his lips on my skin. "It's nice to see you too."

"Who is this?" The woman attached to his hand nods towards me, her voice shaded with a European accent. "How do you know her?"

"This is Kayla." His hand drops hers. "We met a few weeks ago."

She stares at him. "Where did you meet?"

His eyes don't leave my face. "It was on a flight from Boston."

I instantly see relief wash over her. "You're visiting New York?" Her hand reaches to skim over my arm. "You like it here?"

"I live here now." I don't move even though her touch is making me incredibly uncomfortable. Her reaction to his vague response about us meeting on a flight quieted something within her. She was jealous. I could sense it within her eyes but it's gone now.

"Really?" She claps her hands together as if that's the best news she's heard all day. "Do you need a guide to show you around?"

Great. The girlfriend of the best fuck I've ever had wants to be my bestie. I shouldn't have gotten out of bed today.

"Kayla has lived here before." His tone is low.

I turn my head to look at him. He's exactly as I remember him save for the stubble that's now covering his jaw. He's dressed differently though. Gone are the designer suits. Tonight he's dressed in a black sweater and jeans. I'm not sure I would have recognized if I spotted him in the crowd.

"I'm Mickey." Her hand darts into mine. "It's nice to meet you."

"Kayla," I say my name even though I know she's well aware of it. "It's good to meet you too."

"You'll come inside for a drink, yes?" She motions towards the entrance of the club.

I glance at it briefly before I shake my head. "No. I'm actually on my way home. I was already inside."

"That's a shame." Her overzealous pout isn't lost on me. There's another wave of relief washing over her. She wants Ben to herself. I can't blame her.

"Have fun," I say without any meaning at all attached to it. She's going to go into that club and dance with him, then she'll get into a bed with him and experience all the pleasure I felt. Damn her. Damn my life right now.

"Another time, yes?" She leans forward before her lips brush against my left cheek, and then the right.

"Sure thing." I look towards the street in search of an available taxi. "I need to be going."

Ben's hand reaches for my elbow just as I turn to leave. "Let me hail you a cab, Kayla."

"That's not necessary," I quip. I don’t want to prolong my internal agony for another moment. It's torturous knowing my moment with him has passed. I don't want to remember the way his body felt as he took me in that bed. I can't think about the way his lips tasted as they pulled my desire to the surface.

"I insist." His breath roams across my shoulder. "I'll find you inside, Mickey."

With an animated sigh she turns to rejoin the group. Her silence is a clear indicator that he'll need to do damage control once he's said goodnight to me.

"You don't need to do this," I say as I walk towards the crowded curb.

He leans into me, his hand circling my waist. "We'll have more luck if we walk a block over."

I study his face, taking in the smooth lines. His dark eyes are warm. His mouth is curved into an easy smile.

"Are you settling into life in New York?" He pushes his hands into the front pockets of his dark jeans as he slows to walk at my pace.

I nod, "I am." I don't see the benefit in adding more details. He's being a gentleman. I knew it was part of the fabric of who he was the moment he held the door of the car open for me at the airport.

"You found a place to stay?" It's a question that isn't grounded in curiosity about my current address. The way his eyes are darting over the faces of the people we pass speaks of how little he's invested in my answer.

I motion towards a cab barrelling down Lexington Avenue. "I'll grab that one."

His hand is on my elbow before I can take a step towards the street. "Not yet."

"Not yet?" My heart quickens in my chest. "Why?"

He stops mid step, leaning in close to me. I feel his lips brush over mine in a lush, intimate kiss.  The moan the escapes him flows into my body.

On that crowded street in the center of the city, with people rushing around us, I pull my hand into his hair, and kiss him back. It's everything I remember from my first night back in the city. My sex clenches when his tongue pushes between my lips. My body aches when his hand floats along my back to the curve above my ass and my heart stops when I feel his hard cock press into my stomach.

"Come back to the hotel with me." The words fall from him in a heated rush as his lips trail over my neck. "I need to taste you."

I exhale sharply, my breath flowing out in jagged spurts. "I can't." I shake my head.

"You can." His mouth is on my skin again, trailing along my cheek. "I want to be inside of you."

"Mickey," I say her name. "You have a girlfriend."

I feel his hand clench into a fist on my back. "No. She's not that."

I push against him to no avail. My hands rest on his chest. "She's your girlfriend."

"No," he repeats the protest. "Mickey is just a woman I sometimes…"

I don't want to hear the word. I don't want the image floating into my thoughts the next time I'm in the bed touching myself while I think about him. "I need to go home."

"Let's go for a drink." He pushes his hands into my hair. "Please don’t go. I've thought about you for weeks. Tonight is the first night I've been out since then. It's fate that we're here together."

I want the words to have truth woven into them. I stare at him. He knows what he's doing to me. He knows that his hands bring up needs that only he can satisfy. He sees the untethered desire that I feel for him floating over my expression. It's there. It's not hidden or veiled beneath anything.

"Kayla," he says my name into my lips. "I can't let you go yet."

I lean forward knowing that I should get in the next taxi that passes by us. I push my lips into his fearing that after tonight I'll never see him again. I cup his cheek in my hand as I give in to the desire and the desperate need that is inside of me to taste him one last time.

"What the hell are you doing, Ben?" I hear her voice behind me. It's shrill, it's loud and it penetrates the one moment in time I want to last.

"Shit," he says through a nervous chuckle. "Let's get out of here."

He reaches for my hand, pulling it into his. I fumble with my clutch trying to keep up with him as we both laugh out loud at Mickey's curse filled rant wafting through the air behind us. I turn to look back. I feel my heel catch in a sidewalk grate. My hand escapes his, as my purse flies into the air and my face hits the pavement with a dull and empty thud.

"Kayla. Kayla, can you hear me?" A woman's voice tears through the immeasurable pain in my head. It sounds as though she's screaming at me. What the hell is her problem?

My eyes dart open and I'm instantly aware that I'm not in bed at Alexa's. This room is bright. The large light above my head is shining directly into my face.

"Kayla. Kayla Monroe?" She repeats my name. "Do you know your name?"

If I didn't, I'd guess it was Kayla Monroe just by her incessant need to repeat it over and over again to me.

"Yes," I whisper through a swollen lip. "I'm Kayla."

Her hand brushes over my forehead. "Don't move. I'll get the doctor."

"The doctor?" I try to raise my hand to touch my forehead. It's burning. I feel as though I fell asleep with my face inside of a frying pan. "What doctor?"

I sense movement beside me. Where's Alexa? I need her.

"Kayla?" It's a man now. His voice is deep and gentle. It's familiar.

I turn my head slowly towards him. I remember him. He's handsome. We kissed. "Ben," I say his name. I remember his name.

"You're going to be fine." He leans down to run his hand over my lip. "Nothing is broken. You didn't need any stitches."

"Why are you here?" I try to look behind him for another familiar face. "Did I get hurt?"

He nods slowly, his eyes darting beside me to a nurse standing next to the bed. I don't flinch as she grips my wrist to take my pulse.

"Her pulse is ninety-two." I listen as she shuffles with papers. "She's stabilizing."

"Give her four hundred milligrams of ibuprofen and get someone from admitting down here," Ben directs her. "She needs to be monitored tonight."

Why is he saying those things? I turn to watch her walk quickly past one of the curtains that surrounds the bed. I'm in the hospital. I try to sit up. I can't be here. I need to be at work in the morning. I need to tell Alexa where I am so she doesn't panic.

"I have to go." I try to swing my legs over the side of the bed. "I need to go home."

"You can't leave." His hands push me back down. "You're seriously hurt."

"I want to talk to the doctor." I feel my lip quiver. "Go get the doctor."

He shakes his head slightly. I watch him take a heavy swallow. "I'm your doctor."

"What?" I bolt back to a sitting position.

He steadies my balance with his hands on my shoulders. "You fell, Kayla. I brought you here. I'm your attending physician."

"You're not a doctor," I blurt the words out quickly without any thought. I don't know who he is. Could he be a doctor?

"I'm a doctor." He points to the identification badge clipped to the front of his sweater. "I work here."

My eyes scan the badge. I can't focus on the writing. It's blurry. "This isn't real." I feel panic race through me.

"I'm Dr. Ben Foster."

"Foster?" I shake my head certain that I misheard him. "As in the Noah Foster?"

"No, Ben Foster. I'm not Noah. Noah is a photographer. You probably saw a story about him online or in one of the papers," he says gruffly. "My name is Ben. You and I met several weeks ago. You may feel temporarily confused because of the impact of your fall. That will…"

"Do you know Noah Foster?" I interrupt him.

"Do you know him?" It's a challenge woven into a nervous chuckle.

My eyes don't leave his face. He knows Noah. I see it now. That's who he looks like. "I know him," I offer quietly. "He loves my best friend."

"Noah is in love?"

I nod slowly. "You're related to Noah, aren't you? You look like him."

His expression doesn't change but his eyes give something away. "You need to rest."

My hand darts to my mouth and I wince at the brush of my fingers against my swollen lip. "You're him, aren’t you?"

I see the resignation in his expression the moment the question leaves my lips. "I'm who?" he asks, frustrating lacing his tone. "Who do you think I am?"

"You're Noah's twin brother."

He scrubs the back of his neck with his right hand. "Yes. Noah Foster is my brother."

"I live with him," I offer although the moment I say the words I realize the implied meaning in them.

"You what?" His brow cocks with the question. "You live with my brother?"

I pull my hands together as I see the nurse push the curtain aside again. This time she's holding a rectangular tray in her hands. She reaches to hand me a paper cup containing two small pills. I tenderly take it, popping both of them into my mouth. She replaces the cup with one filled with water. I grimace as the liquid touches my open lip before I swallow it. The bitter taste of blood floats over my tongue.

"I need you to call Noah," I say as much to the nurse as to Ben. "He'll be worried about where I am. I mean, Alexa will be worried."

Ben's hand flies over me towards the nurse. "I'll handle this."

She hesitates before she turns on her heel, walks towards the curtain and disappears behind it. I lean back instantly aware that I have to explain to Alexa that I had a one night stand with Noah's brother. He's the brother that she's been longing to meet for months and I hooked up with him.

"I can't believe you're Noah's brother," I mutter the words. "They were just talking about you tonight."

"Who was talking about me?" He doesn’t raise his eyes to meet mine. He's holding a tablet in his hands, his fingers jutting over the screen quickly.

"Noah and his fiancé." My eyes sting with tears. My head is throbbing, my lip feels bigger than my entire face and I know that tomorrow my new job will be in jeopardy because Vivian won't have anyone to run to the corner deli to get her a sandwich.  "Can I please just go home?"

"Wait." His index finger taps my hand. "Did you just say Noah is engaged?"

Why am I the one providing all of this information to him? Shouldn't Noah be sharing the news of his impending marriage with his twin brother? I don't want to be caught in the middle of this. It's bad enough that I have to explain to Alexa and Noah that I crawled into bed with Ben without knowing his last name. I'm ashamed, I'm embarrassed and I want to get this entire mess out in the open as soon as I can.

"When is he getting married?" His fingers brush against my forehead. "What's she like?"

I can't do this. I feel as though I'm betraying Lex. I'm giving this man information that should be coming from her. "You should talk to Noah."

His hand leaps to his own forehead. His index finger traces a pointed path along his brow. "I haven't spoken to Noah in years. I can't talk to him."

My loyalty isn't to him. Once I walk through the doors of this hospital and back into my life, our connection will cease to exist. I'm a one night stand with a complication in the form of a head wound. "I can't talk about Noah to you. I need to call him and Alexa now."

"Is there someone else you can call?" he asks, pulling on the collar of his sweater.

"No," I concede. "I'm staying with them. They'll be worried about me."

He exhales audibly. "Let me think for a minute."

I sense immediately the anxiety that has overtaken him. It's the same reaction Noah had at the restaurant when Alexa pressed him about his brother.

"Just please let me call them." I sit up swiftly again, my hand bolting to the edge of the bed for stability. "Can't they take care of me tonight?"

The darkness around his eyes lifts. "No, but I can."