Ryder (12 page)

Well, he is well and truly on his way into my heart.

“Ryder, do you have a daddy?”

“I did but he died and lives with the angels now. Why do you ask?” I hold my breath waiting for her reply.

“Because I don’t know my daddy.” she says sadly and I can feel my eyes well up.

“Aww Angel, you don’t need a daddy to be you. Your Mama has done an amazing job raising you into the little lady that you are on her own. I know that I am not your daddy, Demi, but I would like to be in you and your Mama’s life. Do you think that’s cool?”  I put my hand over my chest and press, trying to relieve the ache that is there. Why hasn’t she brought this up before?

“That’s way cool. I gotta tell Mama” She jumps off his lap and starts towards me but stops when she sees me. Ryder stands and Rafe and Lucy turn in their seats to see me standing behind them. I look down at my daughter, who has never asked about her dad before but sees fit to bring it up now. Does she see Ryder as a father figure? She has spending time with Ryder and his brothers sparked something in her?

“Why are you crying, Mama?” I bend at the waist to pick her up I kiss her cheek and smile at her.

“Why haven’t you asked about your daddy before now?  Has something happened in day care, Demi?” She shakes her head and her hair is flying around in all directions.

“I see Blake’s daddy all the time and my daddy never picks me up, Mama, just you or Auntie Quinn.” Shit. Before I can answer, Ryder is at our side. He places one hand on my lower back and one hand around Demi’s back.

“Angel, would you like me to pick you up from day care one day? Maybe when I don’t have class I can pick you up and we can go for lunch or maybe go to the park?” He looks at me with a smile on his beautiful face, “That’s if it’s ok with your Mama?” Demi’s head is nodding yes vigorously and I laugh.

“Ok, we will set up a day; that ok with you baby?” I ask Demi and she doesn’t answer she just kisses Ryder’s cheek and wriggles free and runs towards Rafe and Lucy.

“Yay, Uncle Rafe, Mama said that Ryder is going to be my new daddy and pick me up from day care” My eyes go wide and my breathing stop. Where the hell did that come from?

Rafe’s eyes go as wide as mine and he looks between Ryder and me. Fuck me he is going to bolt. Before I lose him before this can even get started, I have to step up and fix this. I leave Ryder standing there, staring at my daughter and I walk over to where she is sitting with Rafe.

“Baby girl, we didn’t say Ryder was your new daddy, now did we?” She shakes her head no with a sad face and it breaks my heart. I try to smile but it is forced. I am too scared to look at anyone but my daughter who is also trying to smile but it isn’t working. I take a deep breath and know that tonight’s date isn’t going to happen. I take another deep breath and stand and turn to face Ryder who is standing there watching me, unmoving.

“Can we do this date another night? I’m not feeling up to it now” I’m giving him an out and if he takes it then I know that I won’t hear from him again. It will hurt, but its best for this to happen now rather than later.

“Why?” is all Ryder says. Looking at Demi and then back to him I reply.

“You know why, we don’t have to do this tonight, Ryder ok? I get it. It’s a lot to take in. I’m just going to give Demi her bath and get her ready for bed.” I turn towards Rafe and Lucy, “I’m sorry guys for tonight. I hope you can salvage what is left of the evening. Demi come on, baby, let’s get you ready for bed.” Demi looks at me confused and so does everyone else.

“Why, Letty? Why do we have to end tonight? My brother and Lucy can bathe and get Demi ready for bed and we can go out on our date. I don’t get why you are ending our night?”

Did he not just hear what my daughter just called him?

“Ryder, please don’t make this harder on me or Demi. I know that you care for her … for us but are you really ready to be her dad? Shit, you are twenty years old for crying out loud.” I lift Demi up and sit her on my hip, waiting for Ryder’s answer. His eyes flicker between Demi and me. The longer he takes to answer the lower my heart sinks. I close my eyes and kiss Demi’s head and take a deep breath before asking everyone to leave us, when I feel strong arms wrap around Demi and me. I turn my head to see Ryder placing a kiss to Demi’s head and he looks me square in the eyes. His gaze is so intense my heart skips a beat.

“I want to get to know you both, Letty. What part of that conversation did you not get? Ok I may not be ready for Demi to call me her dad, but maybe someday I will have that honor. Now, Angel, why don’t you go and show Aunt Lucy where your bath toys are so I can take your mom out on our date?” Just like that our ‘dad conversation’ is over. It’s one of the things I love about Ryder he doesn’t dwell on things and … where the fuck did that come from?

I love Ryder Phoenix.

No, that can’t happen after such a short time, surely? Shit.

After showing Lucy where everything is that she needs to get Demi ready for her bath and bed, Ryder takes my hand and leads me to his car.

“Where are we going?” I ask as we pull away from my building. Ryder looks over to me and smirks, my body starts to heat up waiting for his answer.

“We are going to a nice little Italian restaurant that my mom loves. She said it was a nice romantic place to take you and the food is amazing so it’s a win, win situation I say.” I’m gobsmacked that he has talked to him mom about me; I wonder if he has told her about Demi.

“Before you ask, baby, yes. I have talked to my mom about you and she can’t wait to meet you, plus she is excited to meet Demi. There is one thing you need to know about Mama Phoenix and that is that she is loyal to a fault when it comes to family and as you are with me, she will see you and Angel as family.”

My heart stutters at his words. I have never had a family this big and now I am being thrown in at the deep end with the Phoenix family. We talk a little about Ryder’s family, his school course and the band. I tell him that I have seen Inside Noise play a few times but never had the courage to talk to them. Before I know it, we are pulling into a parking spot and Ryder is jumping out of his door and walking around to mine.

I take his offered hand and we walk into the restaurant where a very pretty redhead girl greets us and her smile widens when she sees Ryder.

“Hey Ryder, long time no see baby. Where have you been?” Wow, does she not see me or is she just being an ignorant bitch? Fuck this shit; I have had enough of this.

“Hi, we have a reservation under Ryder’s name and I would really like to hurry up and eat my food so I can take my man home and have him for desert. Now, can you show us to our table, please?”

Holy shit, that felt good.

Chapter 14

Ryder

“Hi, we have a reservation under Ryder’s name and I would really like to hurry up and eat my food so I can take my man home and have him for desert. Now, can you show us to our table, please?”

Fucking, holy shit. Is it wrong that Letty just totally turn me the fuck on? My dick is hard as nails in my pants right now. That was some sexy as fucking shit that just came out of her beautiful mouth; I place my arm around her waist, resting my hand on her slim hip and kissing her temple.

“I believe my girlfriend wants to eat so we can get out of here.” I use my fingers to turn Letty's head to me so I can reach her lips. I hear the hostess stomp her feet and tells us to follow her. We follow but I keep my grip on Letty; there is no way I am letting her go. She is mine now. We reach our table and the hostess tells us our waiter will be with us shortly. I take Letty’s hand over the table.

“Sunshine, I know it’s fast, this thing that is happening between us but I am ok with it. It feels right, natural. Tell me you feel it too?” I pray that she feels what I’m feeling.

“I do feel it, Ryder. I do, believe me, and it frightens the shit out of me.” I go to speak but she holds her hand up to stop me, “I am a twenty-two year old single mom…” I cut her off before she can finish, she has to know that she has me.

“Not single, baby.”

“You know what I mean, Ryder. But you are a twenty-year-old hot, sexy guy, who has women throwing themselves at you because you are in a band and before you start, I love the band you know that. But I can tell you again that me and Demi won’t survive if you leave us, so I am trying so fucking hard to let my heart fall. And it’s falling Ryder, even though I’m trying to hold back” She swipes a tear away that has escaped from her beautiful eyes. I push my chair back and kneel on the floor next to her.

“Baby, I am not going anywhere. Yes, I know we are young. I didn’t actually know that you were two years older than me, but Sunshine, that just makes me hot. I have a cougar girlfriend. The boys are gonna be so jealous.” I wink at her and a perfect smile creeps across her face.

“I’m hardly a cougar, baby.” My smile widens and I lean up and kiss her.

“I like it when you call me baby. Now let’s order, eat so I can get you home and devour you for desert like you wanted, baby. And what my girls want, my girls get.”

“I like that” she says in a whispered tone playing with her napkin.

“You like what, Sunshine?”

“You calling Demi and me ‘Your girls.’ It makes me believe that you are here to stay.” I reach over and tilt her chin up so our eyes meet.

“I am here to stay, baby. Always. You are the beat in me.”

Holy fucking shit, did I just say that to her?

We order and eat our food, forgoing desert, as we both want each other for desert. On the drive back Letty’s apartment I entwine our hands and kiss her knuckles every now and then, I can’t get enough of her skin on mine, even if it only a small amount.

“Baby, you sure it’s ok if I stay the night? I don’t want to confuse Demi in the morning.” I ask her once we park outside her apartment building.

“I have already had a talk with her, babe and I have told her that we will be doing some sleepovers and she was so excited to know that we can make you our breakfast special pancakes.” She smiles at me and I can’t help but smile back; my heart is beating a mile a minute. You would think this was my first time having sex but fuck if Letty doesn’t make me feel like that.

I hold her hand while walking up to her front door. She stops and turns to me and kisses me, I open my mouth for her tongue to play with mine all wet and hot. I push her against the door and pin her hips with mine.

Hello, hard-on.

She threads her hands through my hair and tugs a little which causes a stray growl to escape me, that only drives her more crazier. I pull away but believe me I don’t fucking want to.

“Baby, let’s take this inside or we will be giving your neighbors a free show and I am going to be the only man to see you cum, Letty.” A blush creeps up her neck and face and I can't stop myself from leaning in and licking the pulse in her neck, which in turn causes Letty to whimper.

Fuck me, now that is sexy. I open the door to find an empty living room; I can see that there is a small light coming from Demi’s bedroom but no Rafe and Lucy. We walk further into Letty’s apartment and we hear moaning coming from down the hall.

“Bastard, he couldn’t fucking wait till he got her home.” I storm down the hall to see the bathroom door open and see Lucy with her head in the toilet, vomiting. Letty pushes past me and goes into Mom mode.

“How long has she been like this?” Letty asks Rafe. My brother looks just as pale as his girlfriend.

“A few days but she keeps telling me that it’s just a stomach bug she won’t go see a doctor.” He wipes Lucy’s face with a cloth. I turn to look at Letty who gives me a smile but it doesn’t reach her eyes. She goes to speak but stops and then does it again.

“What, Sunshine? Do you know what’s wrong with Lucy?” She nods at me and crouches down to Lucy.

“Lucy, is there any chance you could be pregnant?” You could hear a pin drop in the bathroom and then Lucy's cries breaks the daze we are all in. My brother mutters, ‘fuck’ under his breath and pulls Lucy tight to him.

“You need to get a test done, Luce. It isn’t good for you to be vomiting this much. Please see a doctor as soon as you can, ok?”

Rafe and Lucy leave once she can stand on her own and her stomach has stopped convulsing. I follow Letty back to her bedroom after locking up the apartment and my girl is standing there is just her white panties and strapless bra and fuck me if my breath didn’t get caught in my throat.

“Fuck, baby you look beautiful. You look like an angel standing there, which is why you need a bad boy like me to dirty you up. I fucking love that hip tattoo, baby. I’m gonna enjoy licking that.

I wink at her and make my way over to her.  I kiss her full soft lips while she unbuttons shirt and pushes it off my shoulders; she runs her fingers over my tribute tattoo and my body shivers from her touch. I undo my belt and my jeans drop to the floor, leaving me in my boxers. I know she is happy to see my dick tenting my boxers because she licks her lips.