SACRIFICES (45 page)

              Brad stands up absorbing all of this. “So you do believe that letter then. That is what you’re saying?”

              Todd stands up and joins him by the window looking away. “I had a few doubts at first. But now after what I found out I think we did the right thing with that letter. I really do.” He forces a smile.

              Brad smiles and says. “It’s amazing how much we think a like. I wondered about the same things. So I guess that settles it then. We did the right thing.”

              Todd smiles and looks away. “I think we did. Look at it this way. If we had turned in that letter it would have made Howard look even guiltier than the tape would imply, that’s if they believed the letter. So in a sense not only did we do the right thing, we could never feel guilty about concealing something that would have
helped
him in any way because it would have only hurt him more. So we are helping everyone and not hurting anyone. At least that‘s how I accept it.” 

              Brad starts for the door after he picks up his coffee cup and says. “Do you want to do lunch today?”

              Todd nods slowly and it appears he has something else on his mind but he tries to hide it. “Sure.” Brad notices the change in his tone.

              “Hey what’s up? You‘ve had this strange look on your face since I got here, not just your usual ugliness.” Brad returns to the window with a slight grin.

              “Never mind.” Todd walks to his desk forcing a smile.

              Brad persists as he feels he’s not telling him something. “Bullshit. Something is on your mind. Is it something about the case?”

              Todd shakes his head. “No, it’s not the case. But I’d rather not talk about it now. Not until I’m sure.” Todd quickly lights a cigarette and begins to nervously shuffle papers. Brad knows all to well the tell-tell signs of Todd’s nervousness.

              Brad smiles and starts to get nervous. “I don’t like this at all. Now would you tell me?” Brad holds his hands out, almost as if he’s pleading.

              Todd exhales some smoke and says. “I’m your friend right,” Brad smiles and nods. ‘Oh course you are. What the hell kind of question is that?’ “…in that case I don’t want to talk about it. If you trust me just let it go. I’ll tell you when I’m positive.”

              Brad sits back down and starts to show signs of anger.

“With you acting like this I’m guessing this has something to do with Jenny. If it does you better tell me.”

              Todd sits in his high back leather chair his wife got him as a gift for his promotion and begins to spin slowly staring at the ceiling. “Let’s not do this,” Todd looks away as he raises his eyebrows. “I’ll let you know when I find out for sure. Now would you please drop it?” Todd takes a drag from his Camel non-filter and looks away.

              Now Brad is sure Todd’s hiding something about Jenny. He’s furious and concerned. “What the fuck is wrong with you? You can’t expect me to just drop this. Tell me what you know,” Brad’s so pissed by him not telling him, he for the first time in his life pulls rank.
“That’s a fucking order.”

              Todd smiles and nods his head. “You’re going to pull that shit on me? After all of these years you’re going to try that shit? Just who in the hell do you think your talking too? I‘m not just some fucking rookie.” Todd begins to feel insulted.

              Brad looks away feeling embarrassed for being so mad he said those words. “If I have to, if you know something about Jenny I have no idea why you wouldn’t tell me. But since I know you so fucking well and now you’re acting like this I’m scared. You are acting like something is really wrong. You are acting like you know something. As your best friend not the chief would you tell me what you know,” Brad swallows hard feeling nervous. “…as my friend,
Please.”

              Todd is angry with himself for letting Brad figure out what he was trying to hide. “Ok, I hate to do this but I can understand where you’re coming from. I know how much Jenny being gone has hurt you. I see it in your face every day. It hurts me to see you hurt. So, because I care about you I thought I’d look her up and tell her how you feel,” Brad sighs and looks away. “I didn’t want to do this but I didn’t want to see you like this.”

              Brad asks nervously. “Did you talk to her?”

              Todd shakes his head. “No.”

              Brad leans back his head into the chair growing more nervous by the minute. “Go ahead and tell me then.”

              Todd starts to explain. “I only knew her name and the license plate number on her car. So I thought it would be pretty easy. I ran her name through the system. There were only two in the state with that name. I had Rex at the DMV pull up the pictures from the records showing drivers license pictures that way I’d know which one she was and the two that came up,” Todd exhales and looks toward the floor and puts out his cigarette. “Neither one was her.”

              Brad swallows hard. “Maybe you spelled it wrong?”

              “Yeah...you could be right.” Todd smiles trying to avoid the truth.

              “So anyway I remembered her plates on the Bonneville,” Todd has a knack and always has for remembering little details like that. That’s why he’s a great detective. He never forgets and Brad knows it. That’s why Brad doesn’t question him remembering the plate number.

“I ran the tag and it came back a rental car.”

              Brad smiles. “What’s so strange about that? A lot of people use rental cars on vacation.”

              Todd nods and agrees. “Your right, they do. So I traced the location that the car was tagged and it turns out that the woman that rented the car wasn’t Jenny McQueen. It was a Jessica McIntyre.”

              Brad shakes his head again and smiles. “Maybe someone she knows rented it for her.”

              Todd shakes his head. “No, she rented it.” Todd looks away feeling sick for letting Brad read him about hiding something.

              “How can you be sure?” Brad ask feeling this doesn’t make any sense.

              “It’s policy that anytime someone rents a car any where in the State of Illinois they make a copy of their driver’s license. Just for the records. I had them fax it to me. It was definitely her, I saw the picture.” Todd sighs again not wanting to tell him these things until he knows more.

              “Where’s the picture. I want to see it cause I think your mistaken.” Brad insists holding his hand out.

              Todd opens the drawer to his desk and pulls out the picture fax. He hands it to Brad and looks’ away knowing positively it’s her.

              Brad holds the picture and looks at it. He studies it and sits it down. “It’s not her.” Brad clears his throat and looks away.

              “Ok, if you say so.” Todd looks toward the ceiling trying not to make eye contact with his buddy who’s in denial.

              Brad swallows hard and tells him. “Ok, maybe it is, or it’s not. I don’t know. Maybe McQueen is her maiden name or maybe it’s her married name or maybe she goes by Jenny, you know, like Roberts go by Bob and Michael go by Mike...”

Todd nods his head and smiles. Brad keeps going on nervously as it starts to sink in that she lied to him for some reason.

              Todd takes a sip of his coffee and smiles. “You’re probably right. That’s why I didn’t want to say anything until I knew for sure.”

              Brad clears his throat and looks away as he asks. “What else do you know?”

              Todd clears his throat and explains. “That’s all for now. I really didn’t want to tell you anything until I knew for sure. Brad I’m sure there’s a good explanation for all of this. She‘s a good girl.” Todd sits up straight and looks Brad in the eyes.

              Brad picks up the picture and says. “I’m sure your right. Is the address on the license correct?”

              Todd shakes his head. “I think it is, why?”

              Brad nods his head and picks up the fax. “Ok,” He turns and starts to walk out. “I’m going to go see her...” He stops and continues to look straight ahead, away from Todd. “I’m sorry for the way I talked to you. I know you only did it because you care. I do appreciate it.”

              Todd smiles and says as he looks away. “It’s ok. And like I said there’s probably a good reason for all of this. If I was you I wouldn‘t worry about it.”

CHAPTER 21

BRAD SIGNS OUT AND DRIVES HIS JEEP TO PEKIN, ILLINOIS

             
Brad feels nervous about looking her up like this. Nothing about any of this makes good sense. Why would she lie about her name and where she lives? Why? What could she be hiding? For these questions he has he feels like she owes him an explanation. He feels he deserves the truth.

              Brad left Todd in charge during his absence. The drive to Pekin, Illinois is about four hours from where he’s located in Chicago. He left about noon after he took care of a few things. The drive is lonely and nerve racking. He’s more scared then nervous. Maybe she’s married. Or maybe she’s hiding from someone that’s why she uses a different name. Brad tries to find the answers as he avoids what he’s feeling in his bones at this minute.

              Brad reflects on a lot of things while he’s driving. Like Todd, he also has a good memory. Driving by yourself on the highway on a long trip gives you a lot of time to think. He begins to remember different things. Not
positively
, but just little tid-bits in his head. The most prominent thought in his head is she told him she was from Peoria. But the drivers’ license says Pekin.

              He reflects back in his mind about the black sports car theory. The lady that was not married, who worked at a hospital in Pekin. And of course Jenny works as a nurse. He remembers browsing through the report by Tammy and recalls the woman’s hair color was red, but she had blue eyes. He forgot about it as an idea because of her gorgeous green eyes. He also remembered the lady ticketed turned 36, four days after she was ticketed. Jenny turned 36 the day before he met her. That time frame was right on. And after investigating Beth Townsend for so long he knows that she would have turned 36 sometime this year, although the birthdays were not the same date.

              He remembers these things out of habit. When you’re a trained professional at finding people and knowing what people are going to do, it’s a habit that you can’t control. That’s why all of these little things went out of his mind as soon as they entered. Feeling he was just being paranoid because of his job and some of the similarities.              

              Brad stops once when he gets close to take a bathroom break and get some more coffee. The closer he gets the more nervous he becomes. What’s he going to say when he sees her? Is she going to resent him if he’s wrong about what he’s feeling? Maybe he’s just feeling paranoid because she left about the same time that they received the letter from the person responsible for the murders and rapes. He keeps telling himself that it’s coincidence. But is it?

              Brad exits off the highway on I-74 and heads southbound. He stops at a local gas station in Pekin to get directions to the address on the license. He prays that he’s wrong and he hopes she’ll forgive him.

              He pulls up in front of a very nice two-story home in a well-established part of town. The homes are older and mostly brick. It’s a little after five. He can see a light on in the house and some movement inside. No vehicles are outside in the driveway or in front on the street. There’s a two-stall garage to the side and in back of the home. The garage door is shut.

              Brad sits there trying to open the door to approach the house but he can’t move at this moment. What do I say? He wonders as his palms sweat profusely. Brad’s responsible for the conviction of over two hundred and fifty felons in his career and the capture of multiple dozens. He’s been responsible for over one thousand combined years of incarceration for people he’s put behind bars. He’s killed in the line of duty, five men. Been the states number one witness in over twenty cases and has personally been responsible for solving sixteen of the cities biggest crimes. But at this moment in time, he’s too nervous to open his own car door.

              Brad breathes heavily as he tries to find the courage to walk up to her house and ask her the questions that he has to know. Sweating and trembling he considers leaving now and never coming back. He starts the Jeep once, as he almost had himself convinced that he doesn’t need to know, or want to know. Except he couldn’t leave, he’s in love with her. He must know the truth. He has to know the truth. He must find out before he can spend one more day of his life.

              Brad finally musters the courage to approach the house. His knees feel weak as he walks up the sidewalk to the steps to the front door. The name on the mailbox by the front door is ‘McIntyre, Jessica‘. He listens as he hears a TV on in the background. He holds his hand inches from the lighted doorbell but struggles to push the button. He breathes heavily not positive what to say. He swallows hard and pushes the doorbell then closes his eyes afraid of what’s next.

              Brad sighs and stands they’re trembling as he hears footsteps inside draw closer. He stands in front of the door and tries to remain calm as he sees a shadow behind the curtain slowly pulling them back. He doesn’t look. He can hear the cylinder on the deadbolt click as its being turned. The creek from the massive wood door being slowly opened inward and the familiar voice of who he knows as Jenny McQueen says. “Hi.” Very softly and with a slight trace of nervousness.

              Brad forces a smile and slowly looks up. He smiles with his mouth closed and says. “Hi.” Keeping his lips tightly pressed together.

              Jenny opens the door and takes a step back.

“Come on in. I was just getting ready to call you.”

              Brad steps into the house and looks around. The house is beautiful; a fireplace in the living room and wood floors as far as you can see all natural woodwork through out the main floor. “You were huh?” Brad steps out of her way trying not to make eye contact.

              Jenny closes the door when he gets all the way in and she says. “Please have a seat.” She points him to a large sofa. She sits across from him in a matching chair.

              Brad clears his throat and rubs his hands together as he struggles to look at her. “I guess I could say I was just in the neighborhood.” Brad looks up for a moment with his eyes, not moving his head. He’s nervous, very nervous. He thinks that maybe he should just leave now and never come back.

              Jenny smiles and asks. “Would you like something to drink?” She stands in front of him in a pair of sweats and a T-shirt.

              He nods his head as he just takes short looks at her keeping his head downward most of the time. “Sure.”
              Jenny walks toward what’s obviously the kitchen, turning the TV off on the way. “What do you want?”

              Brad shrugs his shoulders. “Anything is fine.” He watches her walk away and feels a sense of relief seeing with his own eyes that she’s fine. At first he worried that she was hurt or maybe something had happened is why she didn‘t call.

              Jenny returns a few minutes later with a glass of what appears to be vodka and orange juice and she’s carrying a can of diet soda for herself. She hands it to Brad and sits down in the chair across from him. He looks over by the TV and sees she has a Winnie the Pooh screen saver on her computer screen.

              Brad can’t help but notice her overly casual attitude. It’s like everything is fine, and they just seen each other yesterday. Not a care in the world on her face or by her body language. “Your home is very beautiful. How long have you been here?” Brad asks trying to start some small talk to hide his nervousness and anger.

              Jenny kicks up her bare feet onto a footrest in front of the chair and says. “About two years.” She smiles as she takes a sip of Diet Coke.

              Brad takes another drink and says. “Pekin, Peoria, I can see how you can get confused when someone ask you where you
live
.” Brad can’t help but act a little sarcastic as he starts to become angrier by her casual attitude like she never missed him or thought of him
at all
. It’s almost like he meant nothing to her and she didn’t care if she ever saw him again. It hurts. It hurts in worse place, his heart.

              Jenny looks away and then back. “I didn’t know you that well...
at the time
. I wasn’t sure if we would work out so I lied...I‘m sorry.” Jenny takes a drink and sits it down on a coaster on the table next to her chair.

              Brad smiles more out of frustration then anything else. “Is this working out? I mean leaving me and not calling. I thought we had something, didn’t you? One of our last conversations was about the possibility of you moving to Chicago then your gone…” Brad snaps his fingers. “…just like that, not a single call, nothing.” Brad swallows as he builds confidence and grows a touch angrier.

              “I was nervous. I was going to call you. I really was.” Jenny smiles timidly.

             
“Bullshit.”
Brad yells. He stands up and starts to pace in front of her.

              “Brad I really was. I just got scared.” Jenny clears her throat not knowing what to say.

              “Is that right
JENNY?”
He stresses her name.

              “I had some problems years ago. I do have an alias. I don’t know what to say.” Jenny looks away putting her head down.

              “Well I don’t know what to call you. Is it Jessica, Jenny or Beth?” Brad looks toward the fireplace not wanting to see the look on her face.

              Jenny clears her throat and nervously smiles. “What on earth are you talking about?”

              Brad turns to her. “I think you know. Don‘t lie to me anymore,
Please don‘t
.” Brad grits his teeth and leers at her.

              Jenny stands up and walks toward the door. “I think you ought to leave. You’re not going to barge in here and start calling me a liar. I won’t stand for that.”

              Brad walks over to her and grabs her by her arms and stares her in the eyes. “I’m not going to leave.” Keeping his teeth tightly together.

              Jenny tries to move back but he won’t let her. “Take your hands off me or I’ll call the police.”

              Brad pulls her closer and says. “I am the police, and I’m already here.”

              Jenny starts to tremble as he holds her arms with his hands not allowing her to move. She sniffles and tells him. “You’re scaring me. Please don‘t hurt me.”

              “I don’t know why you’re scared. I should be shouldn’t I? After all it was you that threatened me. It was you that threatened my son. It was you that killed those guys and raped those women.” Brad grits his teeth not knowing if he should kiss her or arrest her at this moment. He pulls her close and can’t help but feel the
love and anger
as he looks at her.

              Jenny’s breathing picks up and she starts to move backward. He hasn’t loosened his grip; he’s increased it causing her arms to hurt. “Brad I have no idea what you’re talking about. I never hurt anyone in my life. Would you please let me go? I’m scared right now.” Jenny pulls back hard and only then does he let go.

              Brad huffs and puffs and looks her in the eyes. “You used me.” Jenny quickly responds.
“What?”
Brad swallows hard and it almost appears that his eyes are watering. “I thought we had something, I, I, really cared for you with all of my heart...and now as I look back on what we had, all you did was use me to see what we knew about the investigation...” He turns his head and clears his throat and mumbles to himself. “I must be fucking blind...I finally find someone to care about and I was only being used and I fucking never saw it.” Brad shakes his head and closes his eyes.

              Jenny walks toward him and asks. “What did you say?”

              Brad takes a deep breath not knowing how he should feel. “Let’s go to your garage. I want to see what’s out there.” He starts to nervously pace in front of her.

              Jenny smiles nervously appearing confused. “What? Why do you want to see my garage?”

              Brad takes a hold of her hand and says. “If you have nothing to hide and you don’t know what I’m talking about then you have nothing to worry about do you?” He continues to pace as he looks at the floor praying silently that there
isn‘t
a black Toyota Camry out there. He hopes desperately that he’s wrong about what he fears, but he has to know for sure.

              Jenny looks frightened. “Brad I’m so sorry I didn’t call you but I don’t know what you think I did. You come into my house accusing me of being a murderer and a rapist of all things, and now you want to see inside my garage.” Jenny clears her throat and looks to the floor. Then she looks up with a tear in her eye. “If you want to see my garage go ahead, lets go.”

              Jenny starts to lead him to the back of the house through the kitchen as he holds her hand tightly. She leads him down a small flight of stairs and she opens the back door. She grabs a ring of keys and walks him to the side door of the garage. She looks back at him while she turns the cylinder and shakes her head from side to side slowly. The door clicks and she pushes it open. Jenny reaches to the side and turns on the light. The florescent light flickers as he stands next to her waiting for the light to come on. Then it does casting a bright glow on top of her two vehicles.