Santa' Wayward Elf (14 page)

While Derek showered and got dressed for work, Sosie made
breakfast like she’d done the day before, only something healthier this time.
Yesterday, Ben told her he’d been eating nothing but oatmeal for breakfast
since he was a kid and it had done wonders for his blood pressure and
cholesterol. Sosie didn’t have a clue what those things were, but since she’d
eaten porridge for breakfast most of her life as well, oatmeal sounded like a
good idea. Luckily, Derek had a container in the cabinet.

Derek didn’t seem thrilled with it, however.

“I thought you said you liked to watch what you eat.”

“Just because I know it’s good for me doesn’t mean I like
it,” he said.

Sosie didn’t understand that at all, but decided to let the
contradiction pass and instead asked what Derek had planned for the day. “No
more confrontations with nasty men in suits, I hope?”

“Not unless his thugs spot us.” He shoved the last big
spoonful of oatmeal in his mouth. “We’re still going after Saldino, but I’ll
only be sitting on a stakeout today.”

She frowned. “I don’t understand. Why would you sit on a
piece of steak?”

He chuckled. “Not steak as in meat. Stakeout is another name
for surveillance. It means we’ll be watching Saldino and his men and listening
in on their conversations. If we’re lucky, we’ll get something that will
finally let us arrest Saldino.”

That certainly made much more sense than sitting on a piece
of meat. BPs had so many words that sounded like one thing but meant another
that it was hard to keep track.

“How do you do that without Saldino and his men seeing you?”
she asked.

Derek took a swallow of coffee. “Aaron, Tony and I will be
in a truck down the street from Toscalini’s, the restaurant Saldino owns.”

Sosie nodded even though she didn’t get the connection
between the nasty man she had seen yesterday and the restaurant he owned. Maybe
he was charging too much for the food he was selling or stealing secret
recipes. It made sense that a detective like Derek would investigate those
kinds of things. It wasn’t right to charge too much for food. Stealing someone
else’s recipe was worse. Santa would put Saldino on the permanent naughty list
for that.

Regardless of how important Derek’s work was, sitting in a
large transport sled with two other detectives waiting for someone to say
something illegal sounded very boring.

“Do you sit in the truck all day?”

“Until the next shift comes to relieve us.”

“What if you have to use the washroom?”

“We use the one in the bodega down the street.”

“What about food?”

“We’ll grab donuts or something at the bodega.”

She frowned. Elves had their own version of donuts up in the
North Pole, so she knew what they were. And what they weren’t. “But I thought
you said you were supposed to eat healthy food. Donuts aren’t healthy. Why
don’t you come back here to eat? I saw this recipe the other day on the food
station that I could make. The host of the show said it’s very healthy.”

He chuckled. “I’m sure it is, and I appreciate the offer,
but I can’t take off in the middle of stakeout. Especially not to get something
to eat.”

“But you can go get donuts at a bodega? That seems silly.”

His mouth quirked as he pushed back his chair. “Yeah, well
those are the rules.”

She stood and walked into the entryway with him. “It still
seems silly.”

She’d never been big for following the rules herself. But
then again, Derek was a rule enforcer. She supposed he was a stickler for
following them himself.

He shrugged into his leather jacket, then wrapped his arms
around her, pulling her close. “I’ll probably be home late tonight. You going
to be okay here?”

She wished he didn’t have to work so late, but she
understood. “I’ll be fine. Most likely, I’ll spend the day helping Ben around
the apartment building.”

“Well, if you decide to go out, be careful. If you see
anyone or anything that looks suspicious, go somewhere with a lot of people and
a telephone and call me on my cell.”

“What do you mean, suspicious?”

“Anything or anyone who makes you uncomfortable.”

“But I thought you said the neighborhood was safe.”

“It is. Just…” He hesitated. “Promise me you’ll be extra
careful, okay?”

“I promise.”

Derek bent his head to give her a long, lingering kiss.
“Okay, I gotta get going. I’ll see you tonight, babe.”

Locking the door behind him, Sosie went into the kitchen to
clean up the breakfast dishes. She was finishing up when the doorbell rang.
Drying her hands on a towel, she hurried into the entryway to open it and was
amazed to see Tracee and Linda standing there.

“We’re playing hooky from work and thought you might want to
go shopping with us,” Tracee said.

“I’d love to. But I don’t have any money.”

Linda laughed. “Neither do we. Which is why they invented
credit cards.”

Ah. Sosie knew what credits cards were. Most of Santa’s
business came from those magic pieces of plastic that let people get things
they didn’t have money for, all in exchange for a lifetime of very reasonable payments.
Of course, it hadn’t always been like that. Santa and the elves used to give
their products away for free. Then the business-minded elves and efficiency
experts had pointed out how silly that was, saying Santa could improve the
standard of living for all elves if he would sell their wares on the open
market. Before they knew it, “profit before presents” had replaced “it’s better
to give than receive” around the workshops. It wasn’t long after that when
people stopped believing in Santa Claus altogether and started buying their
gifts from the stores the elves sold their wares to.

She gave the two women a sheepish look. “I don’t have a
credit card, either.”

Both women’s eyes went a little wide at that.

“That’s okay,” Tracee said. “You can still go window
shopping with us.”

She frowned. “You’re going out to buy windows for your apartment?”

The other women laughed.

“No, silly,” Tracee said. “We look through the store windows
at all the stuff we can’t afford to buy.”

“Oh.” Sosie grinned. She didn’t know why, but that sounded
like fun. “I’d love to go window shopping with you then.”

According to Tracee and Linda, the best place to go window
shopping was along Fifth Avenue. Walking down the sidewalk with the two women
an hour later, Sosie had to agree with them. From clothes to shoes to jewelry,
everything looked fabulous. They went into a few of the stores and tried on
some of the stuff, which was loads of fun, even if Sosie didn’t have money to
buy any of it.

She twirled in front of the three-way mirror outside the
dressing room, her lips curving into a smile as she admired the slip dress she
had on. Short and slinky, it showed off her legs and made them seem a mile
long, something which was rather difficult to achieve considering she wasn’t
very tall. Tracee and Linda never mentioned her height once, even though she
was much shorter than either of them.

“Are you kidding?” Linda said when Sosie brought it up.
“We’re more jealous of your curves, girl.”

Sosie laughed, sure they must be teasing her. She’d never had
friends like the two women before. She was having such a good time with them
that she almost slipped up more than once when they asked questions about her
life back home. Fortunately, she caught herself before she said anything she
shouldn’t. The women must have noticed she was being evasive because when they
stopped by a place called Starbucks for coffee and a snack a few hours later,
Tracee leveled her gaze accusingly at Sosie over the rim of her mug.

“It’s been obvious from the start that you’ve been fibbing
to us, so you might as well spill it, girl,” the redhead said. “We know exactly
who you are.”

Sosie felt her mouth go dry. “You do?”

“Of course,” Linda chimed in. “You’re an illegal alien from
Canada who snuck into the US for chance to live in freedom. You gave up
everything to escape your previous life and now you’re completely dependent on
the kindness of strangers to survive in this hostile, new city.”

Sosie blinked. Though not entirely accurate, Linda was scary
close to being right. “I am?”

Tracee nodded. “But don’t worry. Your secret is safe with
us. We both lived in Hoboken before we moved here, so we know what it’s like to
feel trapped and completely understand the need to be free.”

“Oh. Well, thanks. I guess.”

Sosie didn’t know where Hoboken was and right then she
didn’t care. She was just thankful neither woman had figured out her secret.

Linda waved her hand. “Don’t worry about it. That’s what
friends are for, right? And we’ll help in any way we can.”

“Of course we will.” Tracee regarded Sosie thoughtfully as
she sipped her coffee. “Though hooking up with a cop is pretty damn ballsy
considering you’re on the run. Do you plan on staying in New York or will you
keep moving around?”

Sosie didn’t answer right away. In truth, she had no idea
what she was going to do. She’d thought Elf Central would send out someone to
find her, but now she wasn’t so sure. Would they bother mounting an operation
to rescue a semi-productive elf girl from the sex toy department who’d
requested a transfer from the North Pole anyway? And if they did, would they
ever find her? This was a big city and she didn’t stick out as much among the
BP population as she’d thought she would. What if her fellow elves simply
abandoned her? What would she do? How would she survive? Other than through the
kindness of strangers, as Linda had said.

She realized the other two women were looking at her
expectantly and she swallowed hard. “Um, I don’t know what I’m going to do. I
haven’t thought it out that far.”

Tracee reached across the table to cover Sosie’s hand with
hers. “Hey, it’s okay. I didn’t mean to upset you. We’ll figure something out.”

“Definitely,” Linda agreed. “The first thing you have to
decide is whether you like it here.”

Sosie smiled. “I love it here. There’s so much to see and
do, and everyone has been so nice to me.”

“Especially Derek,” Tracee said with a wink.

Sosie felt her face color. “Especially him. He’s so sweet
and kind and caring, and he’s absolutely the greatest in bed.”

The redhead’s lips curved. “That answers the question then.
Which means there’s only one thing to do.”

“There is?” Sosie asked.

“Uh-huh. You need to make Derek fall in love with you, so
he’ll marry you and you can become a citizen. That way you can stay in New York
as long as you like.”

Linda grinned. “And then we can go window shopping all the
time.”

Sosie stared at the two women. Make Derek fall in love with
her? Surely Tracee and Linda weren’t serious? She and Derek barely knew each
other. Even if she could somehow manage to make him fall in love with her it,
did she want to? While he was a great guy and she was most definitely sweet on
him, it seemed underhanded to get a guy to fall in love with her simply so she
could have a place to stay. When she told the two women as much, they looked at
her as if she was crazy.

“Sosie, you’re missing our point,” Tracee said. “We’re not
saying you should trick him or anything. He already has a thing for you and I
suspect you’re already on your way to falling head over heels for him, am I
right?”

Sosie had never heard it put quite that way, but she knew
what the redhead meant. She nibbled on her lower lip. “Well yes, I suppose
that’s true. At least the part about me falling for him. But it still seems
wrong to make him fall in love with me. It’s as if I’m manipulating him, like a
gingerbread cookie.”

Tracee pursed her lips in thought. “Okay, maybe I put it the
wrong way. Don’t think of it as making him fall in love with you. Think of it
as letting him fall for you.”

She supposed it did sound better when the other woman said
it that way. Sosie still wasn’t sure it was the best answer to her dilemma, but
she had to admit it was romantic to think she could fall in love with a man
she’d just met and live happily ever after right there in New York.

“Do you think he would?” she asked softly. “Fall in love
with me, I mean.”

“Girl, I don’t think so, I know so,” Tracee insisted. “Derek
was a goner the moment he kissed you under the mistletoe. All you have to do
now is give him enough reason to come to the obvious conclusion on his own.”

The more she thought about it, the more Sosie found herself
warming to the idea. She already liked Derek, and New York seemed a great place
to live. Much better than the South Pole certainly. But then she faltered. What
the fig was she talking about? She didn’t know how to get any guy, much less
one as hot as Derek to fall for her. Long-term relationships among elves were
complicated and usually took years, if not decades to develop, and she didn’t
exactly have much experience in the field. Electronics, she understood. Sex
toys, she understood. Men, not so much.

She sipped her hot chocolate. “Suppose I agree this is a
good idea. How do I go about getting Derek to fall in love with me?”

“That’s easy,” Tracee assured her. “Keep doing exactly what
you’ve been doing, only do more of it.”

Sosie frowned in confusion. “You mean sex?”

“There’s a little more to it than that, but sex is always a
great place to start,” Linda said. “In fact, why don’t you call Derek and
suggest he come home for a quickie at lunch?”

Sosie shook her head. “I can’t. He’s on a stakeout today
investigating some big crime at a restaurant. It sounded very important and I
don’t think he’d want me bothering him with sex.”

Tracee laughed. “Sosie, if this plan is going to work, the
first thing you have to learn is that there’s never a bad time for sex when it
comes to men.”