Satan's Sword (Imp Book 2) (22 page)

“I want to assure you that your human will be treated with care,” Kyle said with sincerity. “We respect your ownership mark on him.”

“Oh, I’m not worried about Wyatt.” I laughed. “He shot an angel in the head this past summer. Big fucking caliber, too. I’m sure he can handle a bitey vampire if he needs to.”

“Well, he won’t need to.” Kyle obviously didn’t believe me about Wyatt shooting an angel or his ability to take care of himself. “I want to offer you your choice of any human in the club tonight. Any. We have a room downstairs you can enjoy them in, or you can take them with you, or I can have them delivered to your home. We’ll take care of the inquiries and the paper trail. Totally off the record. You can do whatever you like to them, make it last as long as you want and we’ll cover it up. Just pick out who you want, and you can take them right away.”

Ahhh. Basically I could rape and dismember a human of my choice without fear of discovery as long as I got the hell out of his club right stinking now.

“But I already have a human. And I’m very satisfied with his services. Can I have a vampire instead? Wyatt seems to like that nice young lady he’s dancing with.” I watched a muscle twitch in his jaw. This was fun.

“We would never insult you by offering you a lowly vampire. The humans here are all handpicked; they are all well known individuals. Perhaps two would be more to your liking?”

I got off the stack of beer cases and walked over to the vampire. “What about you, Kyle Fournier?” I ran a chocolate covered finger down the front of his jacket. “Are you on the offer list? I could spend some time with you and be quite happy.” In reality, I suspected he’d probably kick my ass.

The vampire looked down at me and I saw something flicker deep in those grey eyes. Behind the ruthlessness there was a flash of humor and a grudging acknowledgement. He clearly realized he was being backed into a corner.

“Okay, let’s cut to the chase here.” He dropped the bland expression and looked at me like a fellow predator should. “What do you really want? Because I doubt frolicking with a vampire is that high on your to-do list.”

It was about fucking time. If these vampires lost all the polite, smoothing, bullshit and got down to business, they’d get a lot more done.

“You certainly understand how frustrating it is for me to run all over the metro area following a trail of bread crumbs to nothing?” I sat back down on the beer cases and Kyle relaxed a bit, half sitting on the desk with one foot dangling. “I’ve got bosses riding my ass, threatening to impale me on a stake if I don’t make progress. I’m under immense pressure to deliver this artifact thingy, and I’m not feeling the cooperation here. Just hand the damned thing over, and I’ll go away.”

Kyle looked mildly sympathetic. “I can appreciate the difficulty of your position, but you should also understand that we get a ridiculous number of your kind trying to lay claim to this object. We suffer from an equal frustration, being run around at every demon’s beck and call only to find out they are not able to possess it. Obviously, we’d regard anyone wanting to claim the object with suspicion at this point.”

He gave me a look that clearly said he had grave doubts I’d be able to possess the object. That he strongly believed I was another one wasting their time.

“Look, I don’t want the fucking thing, some asshole back home does. At this point, I want to just deliver it to him, or tell him you guys sold it to the Russians, or something.”

Kyle sighed. “The artifact has to be collected in person. If this “asshole back home” wants it, he needs to come get it himself. It won’t go to a courier. Can you just inform him of this fact? We’ve had this same conversation with thousands of other demons. Don’t you guys communicate?”

“We’re not big on information sharing,” I admitted. “I’ve kind of pissed the guy off at this point, too. I doubt he’d believe me.”

“No! You? How could that possibly be?” Kyle said, his voice thick with sarcasm. I rather liked vampires when they took off that dull boring mask and let their emotions out. I wondered if they were all like this guy underneath that horribly bland façade.

“I’m supposed to go up to Atlantic City next weekend, and I have a very unpleasant suspicion that I’ll meet with another flunky who will give me a bag of ketchup packets and tell me I need to go to Pittsburg for another meeting. My crystal ball predicts I won’t be happy. In fact, in order to overcome my severe depression from the incident, I’ll be forced to spend a lot of time in this club. I’ll also need to spend a lot of time in all your various clubs, casinos, manufacturing plants, distribution centers. As a form of therapy, you realize. It may take me centuries to get over this funk.”

“You’ll be dispatched into the afterlife by the end of the evening with all the energy you’re throwing around,” Kyle sneered, thinking to call me on a bluff. “You should be thinking more about how you’re going to avoid the angel descending on your head and less about blackmailing me and my family.”

I showed him the reddish purple sword on the inside of my arm. It had always garnered such a dramatic reaction from everyone else that I was disappointed to see him look at it blankly.

“Nice tattoo. And that means?” he asked.

“I’m bound. Your angel? His boss put it there. He’s very smitten with me and is greatly amused by my antics,” I lied. Hopefully vampires had horrible lie-radar. “He’d not mind in the least my devoted attention to your establishments.”

“Yes, yes. The angels all adore you. I’m sure you’re very special,” he said, again with the sarcasm. “I think I’ll take my chances.”

“No seriously.” I’d never had this problem before. Damn. “Ask your angel about me. Ask him about the cockroach.”

“Yeah, I’ll definitely do that.” He smirked. “Back to the issue at hand here, we can’t just turn this thing over to you. We could duct tape it to your backside, and it’s not going with you if you’re not the right demon. There is no sense in continuing to waste everyone’s time with these games. Just tell the “asshole back home” to set up his own meeting and we’ll talk.”

“All I want is to go to Atlantic City next weekend and actually meet with your head honcho. I can sense your power levels, so don’t try to dress someone up and pass them off as the big guy because it won’t work. I have a very nice gift, something I know he’ll appreciate, so the meeting won’t be a total drag for him. We’ll sit, have a pleasant conversation, then part ways. I’ll tell the “asshole back home” that I tried, that it was a bust, and everyone will on go about their business.”

Kyle frowned and ran a finger over the chipped desk. “I can’t speak for The Master. I can convey your request to him, but I don’t have the authority to commit him to this meeting.”

How hard was it to get an audience with this guy? It would be easier to get in to see the Pope for fuck’s sake. I threw up my hands.

“Throw me a bone here, buddy! I can’t just walk away from this thing. Let’s find a mutually acceptable compromise.”

The vampire continued to frown and examine the desk. I could sense him thinking, rather than stalling. Threats hadn’t worked, maybe a bribe? Maybe vampires were more motivated by the carrot than the stick?

“I could perhaps offer you a future service? I’m very good at blowing stuff up. Possibly demolition work or assassination? I’m sure you have enemies somewhere to be harried and intimidated. Nothing intimidates quite like a demon.”

“We’re pretty good at handling that sort of thing ourselves.”

“Ok, your turn. Suggest something. Before I get bored. You wouldn’t like me when I’m bored.”

He shifted on the desk and examined a piece of paper. “There may be a rotation of staff in the near future. Some personnel changes could occur. I would hate for these to disturb you.”

I stared at him. What the fuck was he talking about? He met my stare knowingly, as if I was supposed to understand this cryptic statement. I shook my head in bewilderment.

“Personnel changes,” he prompted. “A terrible shame if these disturbed you, caused you upset, and led you to feel the need to express your views.”

“Am I supposed to be disturbed or not?” I asked in total confusion. “And what am I supposed to do or not do if I’m disturbed or not disturbed? And exactly what is disturbing me? Are you hiring a new barkeep and firing the old one?”

Kyle gritted his teeth in frustration. He wasn’t the only one frustrated here. Could the guy just fucking talk plain and simple English?

“Changes more involved than a new barkeep. We would deeply regret if these bothered you in any way and caused you to be displeased, to go on a rampage in your displeasure.”

“So you want me to ignore the fact that you shuffle your staff around and not lose any sleep over it?” Sounded good to me. It’s not like I’d even be aware of any of their staff changes. Crap, I hadn’t even known they existed here, with their little empire, up until this month. No big deal to continue ignoring their existence and going on about my life.

Kyle pounded a fist on the desk. He actually cracked the oak with the first blow. I had no idea vampires were that strong. Impressive.

“There is likely to be a coup soon in the area,” the vampire said through clenched teeth. “I would like your oath that you will support me, back me personally, and make it difficult for those who oppose me. In return I will guarantee you an audience with The Master.”

Well, I guess he could speak for this master guy, or at least influence him enough to guarantee his compliance. Not a bad guy to know, this Kyle. He seriously needed to learn from the elves’ mistakes and communicate in a clear and straightforward manner with us though. Otherwise he was going to end up with a sorcerer in a bag when he wanted a walking, talking one.

“Sounds like fun. I’m to take it that your master fellow won’t be giving you his blessing?”

“Doubtful,” Kyle said warily. “Is that a deal breaker?”

“Nope. Nothing I like better than pissing off the big dogs.”

He slid off the desk and motioned toward the door. “As a gesture of goodwill, will you and your companion leave my club now without further incident, and not return?”

He learned fast. “Sure, although I may reconsider my future patronage if events do not turn out as foreseen.” Ha! See? I could talk cryptically, too.

I walked out and was amused to see Wyatt herding his vampire dance partner all over the floor by the force of personal space. He’d narrow the distance between them, she’d back up, and then he’d do it again. Finally her back hit the table and she looked at Wyatt in alarm as he moved in close and placed a hand on her waist.

“Hey sweetie, cutting in here,” I told her. Wyatt pivoted to dance with me and I saw the vampire actually sag against the table in relief.

“Did you have a nice talk with Mr. Expensive Suit?” Wyatt was clearly having a good time.

“Yes, but I’m afraid we need to leave now. I’m sorry. I can see you’re having fun.”

He grinned. “I’ve had a wonderful time, Sam. Wonderful times with you usually entail getting kicked out of somewhere, though, so I’m not surprised. It was well worth the eviction.”

“I’ll make it up to you, baby,” I told him, making free with my tail on his body.

“I could possibly get drunk enough to overlook the fur and the tail,” he said, eyeing me. “But the wings and horns have got to go.”

“Deal,” I told him as we made our way to the door. I drove home very fast. And yes, the tail was very useful appendage. I highly recommend it.

Chapter 18

T
he week went by, relaxing and uneventful. Wyatt and I rode horses, ate hot wings, curled up together and watched movies until we fell asleep. He’d been practicing killing aliens instead of zombies and I even spent a few mind-numbing hours watching him wave a chunk of plastic around at a television screen and shout in triumph. I was looking forward to a long weekend of fun in Atlantic City, gambling and clubbing. I’d have my stupid meeting, walk away empty-handed, and then Wyatt and I could celebrate the destruction of aliens with a bottle of vodka.

In the back of my mind, I was pretty sure it wouldn’t be that peaceful. Haagenti would probably have his people poised and ready to grab me the moment I left the vampires. It was probably for the best. Peaceful always sounded good, but in reality it was very boring. I was looking forward to a few good fights, as long as Wyatt didn’t get hurt.

Reed called on Thursday night, right as I was finishing up with my packing. Part of me really wanted to send him to voice mail. It’s a wicked twist of fate that something always goes wrong with rental properties right before you need to leave town. Always. And it always requires your immediate presence, often resulting in airline cancellation fees or late arrivals. It was never anything that could be handled by others. I reluctantly answered his call. If I didn’t, he’d call Candy and she’d track me down and make me deal with it anyway.

“Wassup?” I greeted him.

“Ms. Martin, I hate to call you directly like this but we’ve got a problem here that I think you need to deal with personally.”

Of course! I’m going to Atlantic City for the weekend, so it has to be something I need to deal with personally.

“When the first one went missing I didn’t really think anything about it, but the second one, and now a third one, well I’m worried here.”

Whoa, that was really jumping into a topic. What went missing? Was someone ripping copper piping out of my properties? I’d heard crackheads did that and sold the scrap metal to garner drug money.

“It’s just not normal for three to be gone like that.”

“Wait, wait,” I interrupted. “Three of what is missing?”

“Three tenants are missing. These spots in your houses are coveted, so when the first disappeared, I thought someone paid him to leave so they could have his spot. But two more are gone.”

He was calling me in a panic over a turnover of three tenants? “So, what’s the problem here? Just give their spots to other people.”

“We’re not so popular anymore, Ms. Martin. Some are packing their things to leave. They’re saying that you were supposed to protect them, and if you can’t, they are going to run and try to hide.”