Satin and Steel (20 page)

Rhee clicked back to the photos of her sister on the bike. She looked so young, so carefree.
So tan!
The images ran through Rhee’s brain, her heart beating faster. She peered at the lush, green background more closely.
Oh my God.
I think I might know where she is.

Chapter Nineteen

Rhee had to sit on her suspicions for the next week because the crew wouldn’t let her out of their sight. Someone was always casually present, and she knew it was Dax’s doing. Still, it helped to have people around. It was just…the one person she needed, and wanted the most, was back to making a concerted effort to avoid her. Rhee wasn’t sleeping well again, plagued by nightmares, both new and old. Dax confiscated the Ambien, and Rhee didn’t feel much like drowning her grief in drink either. Instead, she opened her eyes each day feeling purposeless, her sorrow and exhaustion preying on her vitality and motivation.

As she did most mornings, Rhee sat forlornly in the porch swing, staring at the blades of grass on the thin lawn. It was hard to believe how drastically things had changed during the three months that she had embarked on her mission to find Mickey. Looking back, it seemed like the last five years of her life had no point other than to screw with her sense of wellbeing and security. The motions of the swing made her feel a little dizzy so Rhee got up and made her way back to her room.
Nap time.
Oddly, sleeping during the day seemed to be getting easier. The nights, the black empty nights, were the most difficult to bear. A near constant exhaustion hung on her, and Rhee didn’t even care to try to shake it.

The guys tried everything to make her smile. Gray told every ribald joke he knew and succeeded in getting the grunts to crack up while Rhee stared out the window. Wince coaxed her into taking a spin on his bike, but the hot steel between her legs only reminded her of Dax and her maiden voyage on the back of his Harley. Sometimes, Rhee caught herself with a fleeting smile on her face at their efforts, but she would quickly wipe it off. She really had no right to be happy.
No real reason to live
, she thought morosely. The sense of being totally and utterly alone plagued Rhee like a demon.

Rollie’s voice carried down the corridor just as she was closing her door. “The V.P. and his old lady will be here later for our shindig. Let’s get this dump cleaned up!”

Rhee’s heart jumped at the thought of seeing Dax and then she buried her feelings, stuffing them into the deep dark pit of blackness that festered in her guts. Trish was off-rotation and that meant day after day of watching the two of them kiss and cuddle. Rhee buried her head in the soft pillow that still carried the faint scent of the tall, muscled biker, imagining his lips on hers instead.
If only…

“Oh God, Oh God, Yes, YES…” Trish moaned loudly as he pounded into her. Dax knew exactly how to press her buttons. Mechanically, he went through the motions to get her off, but his heart wasn’t in it this time. It was more of a distraction to fuck her, and an expectation. At least, it took his mind off of his inner conflict.
Faster, harder, slap her ass, pinch her nipple, tickle her clitty…

He was rewarded as Trish came hard. Dax groaned with his own release as she screamed his name, gushing all over his cock. He hoped Trish didn’t notice how half-hearted their lovemaking felt. His mind was far away. He just couldn’t get Rhee out of his head. He knew she wasn’t doing well, but he figured he would only complicate things by being around. He wasn’t even sure what to say to the girl. He battled alternating feelings of anger, guilt, and protectiveness, but above all, he still wanted to feel her tiny sheath wrapped around his cock like a satin glove.

Frustrated, Dax tried to focus on his relationship with Trish. They had been together on and off since high school and she had been through mad shit because of him. She was talking marriage more seriously now that she was finishing her residency. After all that they had been through, and all that she had given up for him, it was only right that they move forward. Dax sighed. The thoughts of marrying Trish and starting a family together didn’t thrill him like they used to.

Yep, it was definitely going to be awkward at the clubhouse tonight. It would be the first time that Rhee and Trish were in the same room since he’d lost control and fucked the innocent little stowaway he had found crumpled in the back of his van. Dax felt horribly guilty for taking Rhee’s virginity, but he was also secretly happy about it. He would always be her first, no matter what else happened. Dax smiled to himself about that as he showered and changed, leaving Trish in a post-orgasmic haze in his bed.

Dax stuffed the teddy bear he had purchased into his backpack as he saddled up his bike. He had picked it up because of the satin ribbon around its neck.
Soft like her.
She’s like satin to my steel,
he mused. He hoped his little gift might earn him a smile.

After a lot of thought, and discussion with Hawk, Dax decided to ask Rhee to take on some club responsibilities once she was feeling better. He knew she had nowhere else to go and perversely, he wanted to keep her around. It would be challenging to keep his hands off the girl, but he wanted her to know she had a place with them, with
The Phantoms
. Wince had mentioned how skilled Rhee was on the computer. Whenever she was able to shake her funk, Dax would put her on an honest payroll and help her get her degree. It was the very least he could do.

The phone rang, startling Rhee from her catnap. “Hello?” she whispered.

“Miss Blake?”

“I was.”

“Excuse me?”

Rhee sighed. “Yes, this is Rhiannon Blake. Who’s calling?”

“My name is Doctor Cameron Rothschild. I was reviewing some of your charts and I need you to come in for a blood test.”

“For what?”

“Oh, it’s nothing serious, Miss Blake. It will only take a moment. Can you come in today?”

Rhee had nothing better to do. She hadn’t been out of the clubhouse for days. Someone would be happy to take her out, even if it was back to the hospital. She made a four-o’clock appointment. By the time she came back,
The Phantoms’
barbeque would be in full swing. Maybe no one would notice that she was hiding out in her room. Wince agreed to drop her off and come back for her an hour later. Rhee plodded into the shower and let the hot spray distract her. She hadn’t showered in a day or two. It felt good to be clean.

Rhee’s jeans were so tight she made a mental note to stop putting them in the dryer. She stood in Dax’s closet for several moments breathing in the scent of the his clothing. Finally, she finished getting dressed and pulled a comb through her hair, taking care to avoid the healing scar on her scalp. She had been very lucky, according to the doctor who had discharged her. Rhee sighed again heavily.
Luck is in the eye of the beholder, I guess.

An hour later, Rhee stood waiting for Wince to pick her up, the small bag of prescription pills hidden in her purse. She had managed to control her reaction after Dr. Cameron pulled her blood. She smiled at the receptionist, keeping the careful mask of serene calm on her face as she exited the office. Rhee had even managed to lock herself into the handicapped bathroom before breaking down. She sank to the floor, her head between her knees, as twin waves of dizziness and nausea swept through her. Finally, Rhee took several deep gulps of air and pulled herself up shakily to stand at the porcelain sink. She splashed several handfuls of water onto her flushed face before staring at herself in disbelief.

“It’s nothing serious?!” Rhee shouted to her reflection in the mirror, echoing Dr. Cameron’s words. “Is she fucking crazy?!”

A few tears escaped and then Rhee found herself giggling madly at her pale, disheveled appearance.
Shit!
What am I going to do now?!

Chapter Twenty

That evening passed in a weird haze for Rhee. She spent a solid hour sitting in her room staring at the wall, lost in thought. She wasn’t expecting Hawk to pound on her door at the very peak of the festivities. From what Rhee gathered, this motley collection of
Phantoms
and two affiliate crews were here to reinforce their alliance and to celebrate the removal of a major threat to their operations. Her presence wasn’t really needed in the yard, but Hawk insisted she participate.

Rhee found herself bypassing the yard on Hawk’s arm, conscious of the nods, smiles, and stares directed her way. They stopped right outside the heavy wooden door that led to the meeting room. Rhee hesitated, and Hawk chuckled.

“It’s okay, kid.”

Rhee nodded nervously. Non-members weren’t allowed in the meeting room. She truly had no idea what was in store for her as he opened the door. Rhee’s eyes widened as she entered the room to behold all of the original members of
The Phantoms
seated at the carved table. Rollie and Wince, the two grunts, stood off to the side. The door clicked closed and there was a solid minute of silence as the guys regarded Rhee.

She felt her cheeks begin to burn as she stood there, trying not to look at the man who sat to Hawk’s right. Her eyes flicked to him briefly and then she tore her gaze away. Dax was smiling kindly as a familiar rush of heat rocketed straight between her legs. Rhee shifted nervously in her too-tight jeans until thankfully, Gray broke the ice.

He stood up and began to clap. The others followed suit and Rhee found herself in tears as she was passed to each man and engulfed in a huge bear hug. One by one, the guys hugged Rhee, and for once she didn’t stiffen in response. She allowed herself to be hugged and even kissed on the cheek until she was standing in front of Dax. Slowly, she managed to yank her gaze up off of the floor to meet his eyes. She saw genuine affection reflected there as he slowly pulled her into his embrace. She breathed in his spicy male scent and for a moment Rhee was transfixed. Then, she realized that Hawk was speaking.

“Even though what she did was dangerous, thanks to our little stowaway, Salazar is dead, and
Los Chicos
are moving their headquarters while they rebuild.”

At the mention of
Los Chicos
, Rhee looked up again at Dax but he shook his head slightly, signaling her to let it go. There were a few more moments of discussion and then Hawk handed her a little blue box.

“This is from the club. You earned it.”

Rhee opened the box to find a tiny steel pendant with
The Phantoms
emblem stamped on it. “Thank you,” she whispered.

“Hold up your hair, little girl,” Dax said in her ear. She could hear the smile in his voice.

Rhee obeyed, a shiver running down her spine as he fastened the necklace around her neck. His fingers grazed her cheek and she nearly gasped at the bolt of desire that lodged low in her belly at his briefest of touches. Then, Dax was talking and Rhee was trying so hard to listen to his voice rather attend to the erotic images that were playing out in her head.

“So, when you’re ready, we’d like to subsidize your education, stowaway. We can offer you a part-time job, legit of course. The point is, we’d like you to stay. If you want to. You’ll be an honorary old lady.”

Rhee was shocked. She had been wondering what she was going to do once the smoke cleared and the guys realized that there was no need for her to stay at the clubhouse anymore. With the threat to herself neutralized and Mickey’s case technically closed, Rhee had figured she didn’t need
The Phantoms’
protection any longer.

“I-I don’t know what to say,” she said softly.

“Don’t say anything! It’s party time!” Gray said, holding out a glass of champagne. Rhee accepted it gingerly as the guys began to file out of the room. A tug on her arm held her back and then Rhee was alone in the meeting room with Dax. The door clicked shut and she stared at the floor, as her nipples grew into achy little points on her chest. Rhee reached for the table and set the champagne down, grateful to be rid of it.

“Hey,” Dax whispered, trying to hold himself in check. The stowaway looked tired, exhausted really. There was a strange unsettled look in her eyes and she looked quickly away as he peered into the deep green depths. “Are you okay?”

Rhee shrugged nervously.
How the hell am I supposed to answer that?!

“I got you something too.” He held out the teddy bear, and her eyes widened a little.

“You got me a teddy bear?”
Christ, he really does see me as a kid!
Little does he know…

“Thought you could sleep with it,” Dax admitted. He pulled her into his arms and pressed his lips to the thin scar that graced her scalp. “Something to chase away the boogeyman.”

Rhee shuddered as wet heat flooded her panties. His lips fluttered over the sensitive healing skin on her head and she just about melted into his body.
Oh God.
What do I do?!

“Thank you,” Rhee said, trying to inject a little bravado into her voice to cover up the tumultuous feelings that were currently raging in her heart and in her underwear.

“Do you like it?”

“Um hum.” Rhee sighed, feeling the tension seep from her body as she pressed into Dax’s muscled chest. She turned her head to the side to hear his heart beating. Her fingers were at his waist, and unknowingly, they crept beneath his shirt, finding their way to the warm skin under belt of his jeans.

“Fuck.” Dax hissed suddenly, breaking the silent reverie they shared.

Rhee jerked her hands away as she became aware of where they were currently located. “I-I’m sorry,” she stammered, her cheeks reddening as they always seemed to do around Dax.

He took her small hands in his larger ones and squeezed lightly. Rhee was startled to find her eyes welling up with tears.

“Rhiannon,” he said huskily, and a thrill went through her at the sound of his voice. Rhee fought to prevent the tears from spilling over but she knew he could see them shimmering there. She was nearly trembling with the desire to throw herself on him, yank up his shirt and graze her nails down his washboard abs.
Then, I want to taste him…
Rhee sucked in her breath at her carnal thoughts.