Satin and Steel (21 page)

“Dax…there’s something I need to tell you,” she blurted.

He was looking at her kindly. “I know. I know there is, Rhiannon. And I wish I could tell you the same thing.”

“What? No-”

“Rhiannon Blake. If only you were a little older, a little…I don’t know-rougher. You’re just so innocent; you have such a pure heart. Honey, when I think of you I think of all that’s good in this world. I can’t let myself corrupt that innocence any more than I already have. Do you get where I’m coming from?”

Rhee was speechless, muted by the miscommunication that was happening.

“Dax, please let me tell you…”

“Rhee, honey. I know. I feel it too, there’s no denying it. Being with you was so sweet, so amazing. I hope you don’t regret it, ‘cause I certainly don’t.” He paused, remembering just how sweet it had been to taste her.
Fuck!
Don’t choke now!
He forced the next words out, hoping they didn’t sound as false as it felt to speak them. “Baby, you’re meant for better. You know that, right?”

She nodded silently, not daring to look at him. I

“It will probably kill me to keep my dammed hands off you, but I swear I’ll try to, and this thing between us, it’ll pass. I want you here, Rhee. I want to make all of this up to you. You need a family and
The Phantoms
need you too. You can do some things for the crew, totally legit of course. And I’ll make sure you get that degree, a good job, and your own place, whatever you need. I’ll do my best to be there for you, honey. Tell me you’ll stay.”

Rhee nodded again dumbly.
Of course he doesn’t want me.
I’m just a stupid kid.
A very stupid kid.

Dax’s smile set her heart pounding again, and she summoned a tremulous half-smile in return. “Thanks for the teddy bear, Dax.”

Dax stood up from the table he was leaning against, feeling slightly ill over the incongruence between what he was saying and what he was feeling. When her little fingers had slipped into his waistband his cock had lengthened immediately to an almost painful state. Right now, with Rhee so close, he was practically sweating with the need for release. But, Dax knew it best to set some boundaries. He could see the look in Rhee’s eyes. He had seen that look before on some of the
Phantom
stalkers that routinely tried to proposition him.

If Rhee thought he didn’t want her, maybe she would move on and the magnetic pull that drew him to her would disappear. It wasn’t right anyway, taking advantage of her sweet innocence. It was going to be pure torture watching the girl with someone else, and still he wanted her close. Dax told himself it was in Rhee’s best interest that she remain here, where he could keep an eye on her. He had acknowledged to himself that he felt a strange responsibility for Rhee; he had felt it the moment he had laid eyes on her.

“Any time, stowaway. Ready to join the party?”

She nodded again, and allowed him to lead her out of the meeting room. Rhee lagged behind Dax as Trish approached and threw herself into tall biker’s arms. She kissed him passionately. Even though she was hanging back, and desperately wishing the ground would just open up and swallow her, Rhee could hear snippets of the conversation the man she loved was having with his hot, doctor girlfriend.

“I’m done at last, baby! You’re looking at Dr. Trisha Wagner. I think it’s time to move forward with our plans, don’t you?”

“Whatever you want, Trish.”

“I want to do it soon. I’m not getting any younger, Dax. My eggs are approaching their expiration date.”

“Sure.”

Sadistically, Rhee forced herself to watch as the two kissed joyfully. That feeling that often plagued her, the sensation of being so out of place, returned with a vengeance.
His future is here, with her.
He wants me here, but how can he expect me to watch him with her?
Plus…

“There’s our honorary
Phantom!
Hey, stowaway, I brought you some vino.” Wince held it out and Rhee took it gingerly, as though she were accepting a glass of poison.

“Thanks, Wince.”

“You okay?”

“Sure. Just a little um, tired. Maybe overwhelmed. I shouldn’t overdo it tonight,” she said apologetically.

“Hey, no problem Rhee. Maybe we could just sit for a while?” He gestured to the porch swing. The eagerness in his voice made Rhee a tad uncomfortable. She wondered for the umpteenth time why her traitorous body wouldn’t respond to Wince.
This guy is into me.
Why can’t I like him?

Unlike its reaction to other men, her body responded to Dax like he was a lodestone; she felt the pull of his presence as he brushed by with Trish on his arm. Feeling somewhat dejected, she told Wince she thought she might lie down for a bit. The unmistakable look of disappointment on his face told her that she had done the right thing. As she turned away, Dax’s voice carried across the yard, and she couldn’t help but stare at him as he perched on top of one of the picnic tables, beer in hand. Her eyes traveled up and down, taking in the messy white-blond hair, the rippling physique, and the black leather vest that gave him such a dangerous sort of appeal.

As though he sensed her perusal, Dax suddenly looked straight at her. Rhee smiled bravely as he shot her that lopsided grin of his that made her heart do somersaults in her chest and her stomach clench. She gave him a half-hearted wave before melting into the background, out of his range of vision. Then, her stomach clenched again, violently, and Rhee knew she was going to be sick. She ran for her room and barely made it to the sink before the meager contents of her tummy came up.

Rhee regarded herself in the mirror as she stood heaving. All manner of thoughts ran through her head, making her dizzy. After a while, the tears melted away. An eerie resolve crept through her and suddenly, Rhee was looking at a different girl. Where there had been a shaky, scared, confused girl, a girl with purpose now looked steadfastly back at her from the mirror.

There was no reason to cry. There were no tears left to spill over this life, anyways. Rhee splashed some water on her face and made her way back into the room she had called home for the past three months. A glimmer of an idea began to form, and she latched onto it aggressively. Then, she flipped open her phone. There was only one person she could think of that might help her.

Chapter Twenty-One

It was late in the afternoon the following day and
The Phantoms
were just starting to rouse from their all-night debauchery. Wince was passed out on the pool table with a half-naked chick under each arm, a goofy smile pasted on his face even in his sleep. Rollie was knocked out under the long wooden table near the bar, his pants around his ankles, with one of the
Phantom
stalker’s heads in his lap. Empty cans and roaches littered the place, and the stench of sex and stale beer permeated the entire warehouse. Yep, the scene in the clubhouse would have made Rhee’s eyes bug out…had she been there.

He supposed the stowaway had gone to bed early, and he was glad he hadn’t had to keep an eye on her all night. Rhee was still recovering from her injuries and he was pleased she had made the right decision to get some rest. Dax and Trish had gone back to his place and he had begged off fucking her, claiming he just wanted to hold her in his arms all night. Trish went all doe-eyed over that comment, believing that Dax had turned over a new, romantic leaf.

He polished off a fifth of Jack after his old lady fell asleep, trying once more to reconcile the thoughts in his head. Rhee. He couldn’t get that girl off his mind. An image of her face as he had first penetrated her, wide-eyed and innocent, fixated in his brain and he groaned, feeling himself go turgid. Dax pulled his raging cock from his sweats and absently began to stroke up and down.

He had realized what Rhee was going to say back in the meeting room, and he knew he had to stop her. He had seen the love shining in her eyes, and he knew if she told him how she felt out loud, he wasn’t sure he would be able to let her down so easily. He wasn’t even sure that he would be able to deny that he felt something for the stowaway. So, he had cut Rhee off before she could voice her feelings, and luckily, she had seemed to accept what he had said. But could he accept his own words? Could he keep away from her?
Christ all I can think about is getting inside that girl again!

Dax remembered the unbelievable tightness of her, the liquid silk that flowed so copiously from her virgin body. Oh, the exquisite feeling of pushing deep inside of her, the sweet sound of her gasps of pleasure-pain…Dax moaned, stroking faster. He closed his eyes, hearing her cry out in orgasm, his name falling from her full lips. He groaned, recalling the hot gush of fluid that had accompanied her second climax. Then, he found himself spurting into his own hand like a teenager.
Fuck.
I need to see that girl again.
Now.

“Jesus! You dipshits better wake up and get this place cleaned up!” For the first time, Dax viewed the aftermath of a
Phantoms
rager through Rhee’s eyes. He nudged Rollie with his boot, and the man groaned.

“Hey, get the fuck up. This place reeks.”

Slowly, the grunts roused and the girlies giggled as they pulled on their clothes. Even as they kissed their respective dates goodbye, each of the three sluts looked at Dax appraisingly, sticking out their silicone titties, begging him for a glance. He pointedly ignored them.
Damned groupies.

He plowed through the bar and marched straight to Rhee’s door, then hesitated. He wasn’t even sure what he was doing there, for Christ’s sake. Dax knew he wasn’t staring at Rhee’s closed door anticipating a nice, congenial conversation. He just wanted the little stowaway in his arms.
Fuck it!

Dax knew Rhee kept her door locked at night, especially during the raucous parties. He was surprised when the door swung open as his hand hit the knob.
Does she have someone in there?
Jealousy, pure and hot, ran through Dax’s veins and he marched into the room, then stopped cold in his tracks. Something was wrong. The bed was made up and the room looked neat and clean.
Too neat.
As he surveyed the empty room, he knew immediately. The stillness was disconcerting. He could smell the faint scent of her shampoo, but other than that, Rhee was gone.

Dear Dax,

Please tell the guys I’m sorry. I would love to stay, but I just can’t. I have some things to do now, and I have finally found some real purpose for my life. Please don’t look for me. I need time to myself, to figure everything out. I’ll never forget you.

Rhee

Angrily, Dax crumpled the note and tossed it on the floor.
Dammit!
He pushed his phone through his hair and then remembered his phone. He pulled it out and opened the GPS application. At first he couldn’t discern the little blue dot that belied Rhee’s location. Then he realized that was because the blue dot was hidden under the red one-the one that showed his own location. Dax swore, and began searching the room. He located Rhee’s phone, still in its pink sparkly case, abandoned on the bedside table.

Dax sat down heavily on the bed.
She’s really gone.
The thought sent a dull, uncomfortable thud through his chest. Chagrined, he considered sounding the alarm and sending every one of his hung-over boys out to find her. He picked up the crumped note from the floor and reread it. He had really thought the perfect solution was for her to stay. At least for a while.
Fuck it.
She wants out, so be it.
It’s probably for the best.
He tossed the note into the wastebasket on his way out, knowing that he wouldn’t be the only disappointed
Phantom
in the clubhouse today..

The warm blast of fragrant air was a welcome sensation after the long plane ride. Rhee had to stop herself from looking over her shoulder every five seconds. There was no way anyone would recognize her. She visited the ladies room and nearly did a double take at her own reflection. Charisma had really gone all out, just like Rhee had hoped she would.

Rhee’s auburn hair had been lightened significantly. The highlights turned her formerly dark tresses into a rich golden shade with only the barest hints of red. The new color contrasted nicely with her olive skin. Rhee had on more makeup than usual and the brown contacts she wore matched the description on her new driver’s license. Charisma was pretty resourceful, Rhee had to give her that.

There was a time in her life when Rhee would have never even considered doing what she was doing now. Assuming a fake identity, hopping on a plane, and taking off were things that only happened in the movies. Even after all of the trauma she had endured, something had always directed her movements and her purpose. That something, or rather, someone, was gone now. It was as though everything had just built up to a fever pitch and then a part of Rhee had just snapped. She wanted a new life, a different life, someone else’s life. And now, with any luck, she would have it. The strains of a ukulele tickled Rhee’s ears as she headed out of the baggage claim area, her small suitcase and backpack in tow.

“Aloha, miss!” A jovial woman greeted her, placing a lovely-smelling white lei around her neck.

Rhee found a rare smile settling on her face as she stood still for a moment, feeling the slowness of this new place sink into her very bones. She knew she had made the right decision. It would do her some good, to be far away from everyone and everything she had ever known. She could really start over here. She clutched her bags tightly as she stepped onto the curb outside the small airport; they held all of her material possessions, meager though they might be. When she cleaned out and closed her bank account, Rhee had been surprised to find that she had accumulated close to four grand over the past few months.
Should be enough to live on until I can find an job, and a place of my own.