Save Me

Save

Me

H.M. WAITROVICH

Copyright © 2014 H.M. WAITROVICH

Cover designer: Viola Estrella

All rights reserved.

ISBN:1502789442

ISBN-13:978-1502789440

DEDICATION

I wanted to dedicate this book to the many women out there who have been there. Whether it be just emotional abuse, or physical, it is not ok. I consider myself pretty kick ass but it happens to the best of us. Don’t let it happen to you, and if God forbid it does…run like hell.

CONTENTS

The turning point in the process of growing up is when you discover the core of strength within you that survives all hurt.

-Max Lerner

ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

I have given credit to many people in my other books but this time I wanted to do things slightly different. It because of my very challenging life experiences that I can even write at all. Writing is a tough gig. I have found this out the very hardest way. So many people can inspire you and that has happened for me over the years. My husband inspires me to write these steamy passionate love stories, and my children inspire the little people that are created in these passionate stories. I always have a love story, a pregnancy, and very snarky best friend in my books. All inspired my real life husband who is still my prince charming in his own way, and my savior. My children, my two beautifully wild, and crazy girls, Audrey and Madi, you make Mommy proud and you keep me on my toes. To my wonderful parents for putting up with me through all of my drama. I love you both. Finally to my favorite authors, you all inspire on a daily basis. Between being a mother, working full-time and trying to find time to write and read, I find my inspiration through you. Thank you, Thank  you, Thank you from the bottom of my heart and soul and beyond.

I also want to thank you from the bottom of my heart to my awesome cover art designer, Viola Estrella your work is beautiful, and I could not have done this without your great work.

www.EstrellaCoverArt.com

Prologue

I opened my eyes and for a moment almost forgot where I was. My arm is asleep. I have lost track of time. My baby girl and I have been on this old Greyhound bus for what seems an eternity, going somewhere as long as it is not back to Chicago. I heard a horn from an eighteen-wheeler behind the bus; it startled me, bringing me back to my reality. We have driven through so many towns at this point I have no idea where I even am. As the bus, drives along I see the miles and miles of ocean to my right, it is beautiful and makes me relax a little more.

I guess you could call me a runaway teen. That sounds funny, but I am running away. I cannot close my eyes without seeing his face.  That same face used to protect us, used to love me and now all I see is hate, rage even.  He was never who he said he was but that doesn’t matter now.  He will never find us, not ever again.  I do not care what it takes.

I’m not a fighter but I will fight him. That horrible night something snapped inside me.  I will fight back. When I saw all the blood, thick and warm and red in color, I just picked up the bags, grabbed my baby’s hand and we ran, and will run until I find a safe place for us; somewhere he can never find us. Running from my house holding my daughter, I had not realized that there were hot tears streaming down my face. I was in shock and felt like I could snap any second. My neighbor had arranged to buy us bus tickets that afternoon and she left them in her mailbox, I grabbed them quickly and ran like hell to the bus station. Never once looking back.

Chapter 1

              We stepped off the bus into a small town that in Georgia they call Good Hope.  I do not know why I decided to get off here but the name caught me, Good Hope.  I need some hope in my life so it seemed right. Looking around me the scenery reminded me of a movie I once saw, simple living with simple happy people.

My name is Grace Peterson, I am 26 years old and I have a three-year-old daughter named Annabelle that I would give my life for, sometimes I feel that I already have. 

When I was twenty-three years old, I met Max for the first time.  He was sweet, and did and said all of the right things.  I fell in love instantly, or at least what I thought was love.  I had never been in love so I did not really know what it meant.  It was new and exciting, I loved everything about him, so when I found out that I was pregnant just eight short weeks later, I did not really get too upset.  I thought this was meant to be and it would all work out eventually.  Max was so excited and insisted we get married right away.

I did not have any family.  My parents died when I was eleven in a car accident, and my two sisters died with them, they were older and went to a different school than I did so my parents picked them up first and then on their way to get me they were in a wreck, none of them made it to the hospital, I did not have any other family really so I was excited to share my life with someone.  I had just graduated from college and used most of my inheritance that I got from my parents on my tuition; I was living off what was left.  When that ran out, I got a job.  I worked in the library at my school in Chicago. I love the smell of old books it was always a form of comfort to me.

It did not pay much, but it worked for me, and Max insisted that I did not need to work because he made enough for our family.  He was a lawyer, he knew all of the police and all of the judges in Chicago and everyone loved him.  No one had any idea what type of man he really was, including me. 

It was not until I was about seven months pregnant and married to the creep, that I realized something was off.  He had grown demanding and jealous.  He was always calling me to see where I was, even when I was at work.  He called repeatedly and it was affecting my life, but I tried to hide it.  I did not want to admit that he was not who I thought he was.  I once went to a support group for women who were victims of domestic violence, I watched them cry for each of their sob stories and when it came time for me to speak, I froze and walked out. How can I even begin to explain what was happening to me if I didn’t even know myself?

Things got better after I gave birth to Annabelle.  He was different, gentler. There was the occasional obsessive calling, but it was better.  I did not know that he was controlling my entire life. When Annabelle was two, he put his hands on me for the first time.  I let it happen repeatedly.  Covering up the bruises on my collarbone and arms with makeup and long sleeved shirts, which looked ridiculous in the summer. I wanted it to be over.

              Nevertheless, when I thought about it, could I even stop him if I tried?  What would he do, kill me?  I did not want to find out.  I could not leave Annabelle behind like that.  I quickly grew smart, I packed things slowly and only every few weeks so he would not notice toys or clothing missing.  He noticed things no matter what it was.  I was afraid, but I knew I had to be ready in case anything happened.

               I heard a seagull in the distance, followed by, “Mommy I am so tired of traveling, and are we home yet?” I smiled.  “No baby, not yet, we will find a home here, is that ok?”  “Ok mommy, but will daddy be there?”  I let out a huge sigh, “No baby, Daddy won’t be there.  Daddy won’t be around anymore.”  She half smiled and said, “Ok, its ok mommy, Daddy isn’t nice to you at all.”  My heart broke in even more pieces than it already was, “I’m sorry, Daddy is sick, baby.  I am so sorry you had to see that.”  She just went about skipping up the hill to the store on the right.  I hope that for her sake she did not understand.  She is a smart kid, but I hope she is too young to realize. The smell of the sea was like a comforting blanket being draped around my shoulders. I can understand why people live here; it is peaceful and full of promise.

I walked up the sidewalk.  I am sure we look ridiculous with these bags.  I had three to our name.  One with what little clothes I could pack, one with Annabelle’s toys and the other held what little food and household products I could squeeze into one suitcase.  I had saved up a couple thousand on my own without Max knowing; however, it would not get us very far.  I paid with cash so there was no trail of me anywhere.  I even dyed my hair from a blonde-haired woman to brown at the last motel we stayed in so that I was not recognizable.  I did not want to, but I cut Annabelle’s long locks.  Not too short, but short enough that she looked different, without looking like she was a little boy with a bad need for a haircut. 

I noticed the sign in the window of the convenient mart that said “
Help Wanted
.”  I felt relieved.  I set our bags on the sidewalk out of the way.  I am sure no one will bother them in this small town.  Before I walked I checked my reflection in the window of the store, I have dark circles under my eyes and I looked much older than I was, my clothes were slightly wrinkled from sitting on the bus for so long, I pinched my cheeks to give some color back to them and I walked in and the friendliest woman I ever seen smiled at me and said, “Hi there!  You look like you are new around here.”  I smiled and said, “Yes we are, my name is Grace, this is my daughter Annabelle.  We have been traveling a while and I am looking for work.  I wanted to see if maybe I could apply for your position that you have?”

“Oh honey, of course!  This town is so small and we do not get many new folk around here. Finding full time help with someone who does not already have a job in town is like finding a needle in a haystack.  I do not get very busy, but I am getting older as you can see and I cannot be here a lot.  I have frequent appointments with my doctor and I need some help.”  I was so happy to hear her say that.  The old woman did look somewhat fragile, she had age spots on her hands and wrinkles next to her eyes and hairline, but she had the kind of smile that was inviting, it made you feel welcome, safe even.

“Well I haven’t worked in a while, but I used to dabble in all sorts of things, I promise I am dependable and hardworking.  My little Belle here is very healthy; she does not get sick often so I will not miss any work.  I know it seems strange that I came off a bus with my child and I do not have anywhere to go, if I can be completely honest with you, I am not a criminal and I do not have a police record.  I just have a past, a past that I want to leave behind.”  Her eyes were the bluest of blue and she just smiled. Not the polite I feel sorry for you kind of smile, but a friendly I do not care about your past as long as you are not a psycho kind of smile.

“Well darlin’ you had me at hello!  When can you start?”  I could tell she felt sorry for us.  I did not want that, but I would take it for now because I needed this job.  “Well I could start tomorrow; I need to look for a room or apartment for rent in town.” Hopefully something not run down.

“Oh child you have wandered in at the right time!  I have a little house that was left to me from my late husband’s nasty old mother!  I do not use it, but I keep it clean and updated.  I have my own home.  I don’t need that crazy old coot’s house, “she said.  “Oh my, are you sure?  I can pay, work for rent and pay you rent,” I said. 

“Oh non-sense girl, just take care of it and we will call it even.  I cannot keep up with it anymore,” she said.  I could not believe she was doing this for us.  I know that she felt sorry for me, hell I would feel sorry for me too.  “I can never thank you enough!” I said excited.

“Don’t mention it honey.  Here is the key; it is literally right next door on the left.  It is fully furnished and the utilities are on.  Make yourself at home!”  I could feel the tears starting to well up in my eyes.  No Grace, hold them back, she does not need to think your some kind of head case.  

“Well thanks again.  I will just go drop our bags off and get Annabelle settled in for the night.  She is so tired from the drive.”  I had not noticed, but my little Belle had fallen asleep next to the old woman’s dog. I guess she was comforted like me

Chapter 2

              I found the house and I cannot believe a woman who does not even know me has given me a job and a home.  I was so afraid that I would not find anything.  Nevertheless, she has given me the chance to start over.  I will forever be grateful and forever owe her. I had gotten our bags unpacked while Belle slept.  The house had everything that I did not.  Dishes, furniture, linens on the beds, it even had two separate rooms so Annabelle could have her own room and I as well.  There were curtains on the windows and in the kitchen, she had painted it red. It was like this cozy little cottage by the sea, and I was in love.

I just wanted to cry.  I thought that we would not make it sometimes.  The weeks we went from state to state, town to town, I thought I would never have a home.  Nowhere to ever feel comfortable or safe, but this place had definite possibilities.

The truth is I never did have a home since I lost my family, I went to live with an uncle who I barely knew and did not know existed and he was always gone on business and never home. I was not even sure if he was really a blood relative or someone my parents once knew who was lucky enough to be put in their will. I learned to fend for myself at an early age, and once I graduated high school, I left.  However, even living in the dorms in college or the home I shared with Max, it never felt like I had a home.  This home though, felt different.

It was just around ten pm when I heard a car door and I immediately panicked.  It is too late to have a visitor, and who would visit me? I ran into Annabelle’s room to check on her.  Then I reached into my purse and grabbed the can of mace that I had picked up along the way.  I know I am a paranoid freak, but I was so afraid that Max would find us.  He knew too many people and he would look until he crawled to the ends of this earth to find me.  I stepped over to the window by the front door as quietly as I could.  I heard boots on the porch, crap; I looked down to make sure I knew how to use the mace, what am I going to do with a freaking can of mace.  You cannot mace someone to death, I waited by the door, I saw a shadowy figure in the window, but it was too dark to make him out. He was too tall to be Max, but what did I know, I had not slept more than three hours in weeks.  This could very well be my crazy imagination, maybe I am losing it.  I hope so or else this person is about to get it! 

I jumped when the creeper finally knocked on the door.  What kind of an intruder knocks?  “Who’s there?” I said.  This was it, I thought.  I knew it was too good to be true. 

“Oh, I am sorry to bother you,” he said, “but Gloria sent me to check on you and your daughter.”  Gloria?  Who is Gloria?  Oh my goodness, Gloria is my new boss and landlord; I do not remember her telling me her name. “Ok, well it’s awfully late and we are just fine, thank you.” I said. I was aggravated at how he just showed up unannounced.

“Ok, she sent a casserole, look I know this seems weird, but I just got off work and I live down the road, I usually check in on Gloria when I get off work. She sent me to check on you and then gave me this casserole to give you.  I am sorry if I startled you.  I will just leave it on the porch.”  His voice was calm, almost sweet.

I felt bad now; I opened the door and was startled at how handsome he was, he stood about 6’2 and he was tan and dark haired, and he had the greenest eyes I had ever seen. His hair was styled lightly to the left of his head and fell in the right way to make it seem like he had just rolled out of bed. “Hi, I am so sorry, I am a little jumpy. I do not know anyone in town besides for Gloria and I just arrived today.  I wasn’t expecting anyone,” I smiled.  “My name is Grace,” I said giving him a light smile.

He smiled too and it was a nice smile.  “It’s ok really, I understand. I seem like a total creep lurking on your porch at ten pm.  Anyway, I will leave you to it.  It’s nice to meet you Grace,” he smiled.  “My name is Oliver.  Most people call me Oli.” 

“It’s nice to meet you too Oli.” He walked down my porch to his car and then he was gone.  Holy crap, he almost gave me a heart attack.  I have to remember to save up money for a motion light to alert me at night.  He was nice enough, but I have seen that kind of smile before.  I obviously did not have very good luck with men so I will stay away from that one.  Besides, I am too broken for any man to ever want me, ever again. 

I walked back into my bedroom.  It was so nice to say my bedroom.  As soon as my head hit the pillow, I was out like a light.  Letting the exhaustion take over, I could not stay awake forever.  I had to tell myself that we were safe, even if it was a lie.