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“Sounds good. Um, Jeff, I really need to talk
to you about something. It’s really important.”

As I looked down at her, I ran the back of
hand down the side of her face.

“Do we need to talk now, baby? I can just
tell Garrett that I’ll be up in a little bit.”

“No, they need help, and this is Garrett and
Emma’s big day. We can talk after the party.”

“Okay, baby, if you’re sure. Is everything
okay, Ari?”

She smiled at me, and the spark that was in
her eyes made me smile back at her.

“Yeah, at least, I um…yeah…no, really, it’s
fine. Come on, let’s go.”

I took Ari’s hand as we made our way outside.
Garrett was waiting for us, leaning up against his truck.

“Hey, Garrett, I’ll just follow you. That way
when it’s time to leave, I won’t have to ask anyone for a ride.” I
said as I held open the truck door open for Ari.

He nodded and got in his truck.

***

We spent the morning setting up tables and
chairs for the party. Gunner was practically flying high after
working from with his father. Ellie was so in her environment, and
I was glad to see her smiling as much as she was. She adored Emma,
and Emma adored her. Grace seemed to be falling right into the role
of mother-in-law perfectly. She and Ellie got along so well. And at
times, my heart just wanted to burst because I was so happy for
Ellie.

Heather seemed to be slipping further into a
funk, especially with Lynda following Josh around. Josh just
seemed…shit, I don’t know how Josh seemed. Fucked-up is the only
way I could describe it. It wasn’t a good sign that he had already
started drinking around lunch-time.

Sitting on one of the hay
bales, I tried to listen to Gunner going on about something with
the cattle, but I couldn’t pull my eyes away from Ari.
My beautiful Ari.
She
looked happy, but at the same time, she looked so lost. She had
such a beautiful glow about her, I lost my breath just watching
her.

She was now arguing with
Josh about where he was going to put the washers game. Josh looked
like he was about to pull his hair out.
I
should really be a better friend and go save him from my beautiful,
outspoken future bride.

I decided it was kind of fun just sitting
here, watching the two of them.

Ari put her hands on her hips and tilted her
head at him. I watched the whole thing play out. Ari tilted her
head and put her hands on her hips. She just looked at him with
that look of hers, and the next thing I saw was Josh moving the
game.

I smiled, and just then, Ari looked over at
me. Her frown turned into that goddamn smile of hers. If I had been
standing up, my knees would have buckle.

Gunner nudged me with his shoulder, and I
moved my gaze away from Ari to look at him.

“Dude, you do know how lucky you are to have
her, right?”

I smiled as I looked back at Ari, who was
still looking at me. Her face seemed….concerned. I knew she wanted
to talk to me about something, she seemed excited about it but
nervous as hell also.

She started to walk toward us, I instantly
felt my body react to her. As she reached me, she lowered her head,
looking at me through those beautiful long eye lashes of hers. It
was almost like she knew how much I wanted her.

I turned back to Gunner and smiled.

“Yeah, dude….I know.”

CHAPTER THIRTY

ARI

I watched Emma and Garrett
laughing while enjoying the company of all their friends and
family. I looked over at Jeff who was talking to my mom and
dad.
Someone was going to slip soon about
the baby.
I really needed to talk to Jeff
soon. I almost died earlier when I’d made the comment about me
getting bigger.

Matt came running up to Jeff, calling out
Jeff’s name. Jeff bent down and picked up the oh-so-happy Matt. I
smiled as I watched the two of them. I put my hand to my stomach
and instantly felt like I couldn’t breathe. When I leaned forward,
I felt a hand rubbing my back. I knew in an instant that it was
Ellie.

“Breathe, baby girl. Just breathe.”

“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, I
can’t do this, Ellie! What if this baby has Fragile X? I’m not like
my mother. I can’t do it. I just can’t!”
Holy fuck, I was having a melt-down.

Worried that Jeff might see
me freaking out, I looked over and noticed he was taking Matt down
to the barn.
They must be going to look at
the horses
.

Ellie reached over and placed her finger
under my chin and turned my head towards her.

“Listen to me right now, Arianna. You’re
going to be fine, and this baby is going to be fine. You aren’t
even sure if you’re a carrier, so stop worrying yourself sick. But,
sweets, ya have to tell Jeff. You have to tell him tonight. No more
excuses. You can’t keep trying to do this on your own. Jeff loves
you more than life itself, and he’s going to be so damn happy.
Please, Ari, go talk to him.”

I felt the tears building up in my eyes, and
I willed myself to stop them. I smiled at Ellie, I leaned over and
kissed her on the cheek.

“Have I told you today that I love you?” I
asked, winking at her.

“No. No, you haven’t bitch,” she said winking
back with a smile.

Laughing, we stood up and
hugged. I held on to her just for a few seconds longer than
needed.
I would be lost without this
girl.

“Okay, I’m gonna go talk to him right now.
I’ve been sitting here all day waiting for someone to accidentally
slip and say something to him!”

Ellie let out a laugh as I turned and made my
way down to the barn.

As I rounded the corner, I could hear Jeff
and Matt talking.

“Where’s Ari’s horse, Jeff?”

I stopped to listen, peeking into the barn. I
was curious to see if Jeff was going to remember to be specific
this time.

“Well, buddy...she’s over on our property. I
have her out in a pasture right now. She’s not the type of girl who
likes to be held down in a stall for too long. She really loves to
be free and run around with the sun on her.”

“Like Ari! Ari likes the sun on her face,
too, doesn’t she, Jeff?” Matt said Jeff with a huge smile on his
face.

God, how I love Matt. His heart was pure, and
his laughter was infectious. He was so special to us. There was
something about him that just made people feel so loved when he
smiled.

“Yeah, buddy, she does. Ari is just like
Stargazer no one can hold her down. She’s probably the most amazing
woman I’ve ever met.”

“Jeff, you’re an assmole! Ari is a girl, not
a woman!”

Oh shit!
I couldn’t help it when and I let out a small
giggle. I had to laugh every time Matt said assmole.

“Matt, buddy, trust me Ari is a woman,” Jeff
said, placing his hand on Matt’s head.

“I’m gonna give you a hug, buddy, okay?” he
asked as Matt smiled up at him. Jeff gently pulled Matt in for a
hug.

I felt a single tear run down my face. Just
then, my mother walked up next to me, putting her arm around me.
Reaching up, I wiped away my tear, trying to get myself back
together again.

“It’s going to be okay, Ari. You know what
you have to do, baby girl.”

I shook my head as my mother and I walked
into the barn. Jeff looked up and smiled at us.

“Matthew, sweetheart, come on back with me.
Emma just bought a new mop,” my mom said.

Matt just about screamed because he was so
happy.

“I want to mop!”

I watched as my mom and Matt walked out of
the barn toward the house. Taking a deep breath, and turned to face
Jeff. Taking me by surprise, he grabbed me and kissed me so
passionately that my legs almost went out from under me.

“Arianna, I love you so much.”

I smiled as I looked up into his beautiful
green eyes. “I love you, too, Jefferson…so very much.”

As he kissed me again, I almost wanted talk
him into making love to me right here and now, so I could lose
myself in his love.

Knowing I had to do this though, I pulled
away just a little.

“Um, Jeff, I really need to talk to you,” I
said, looking up at him.

He smiled as he took my hand and walked me
over to a hay bale.

“Alright, baby….talk away.”

“Well, um….I’m not even sure how to tell you
this, but.”

His cell phone rang. He pulled it out of his
pocket, looking at the display, he frowned. He shoved it back into
his pocket and looked at me.

“Don’t stop, Ari. Keep going.”

“Okay, well, when I went to the doctor on
Monday, I um, I found out.”

“You got the results back already? Ari, why
didn’t you tell me, baby? What did they say? Are you a carrier of
the gene?”

Wait…what? Oh god.
My head was spinning.

“No, I won’t get the results back until after
another week or so.”

“Shit, Ari, I thought you had been holding
this in for the last two days.”

I let out a small laugh. “Ah, no, but I did
find out something else.”

Just then, his phone rang
again.
Of all the fuck-ass times, why is
he getting a signal now?
He looked at it
and then back at me.

“Give me just two seconds.”

I sat there, stunned. It had to be
Rebecca.

“Hey, Rebecca. I thought I
asked you to not….
what?
Are you okay?”

I’m going to hell for the thought that just
crossed my mind.

“Yeah, I’ll leave right now.

Jeff jumped up and started to walk away from
me.

What the fuck?

“Jeff!” I yelled.

He turned around to look at me.

“Oh shit, Ari! I’m sorry, baby. Rebecca is
having contractions. They’re pretty far apart, but she’s freaking
out.”

“Wait, Jeff, I really need to talk to you.
Can she not wait just a few extra minutes for you?” I said, almost
pleading with him.

“Ari, baby, is this really that
important?”

Tears started to build in my
eyes.
Oh my god.
He was picking her over me. I felt like I was going to throw
up.

“Ari! I need to go! Is this something that
can wait until later tonight or tomorrow?”

“Tomorrow? Are you planning on staying with
her tonight?”

“Well, no, of course not. But what if she
needs to go to the hospital or something?”

When his phone rang again, he lifted it up to
answer it, but I grabbed it from him, sending the call to voice
mail.

“Ari, what the fuck? Give me the phone.”

Now, I was just plain pissed off.

“No, I have to talk to you
about something, and I need to talk to you about it now, Jeff. It's
very important, and it involves
our
future. So, no, I won’t wait until tonight or
tomorrow.”

The fucking phone rang
again, and Jeff grabbed it out of my hand.
Of all the times for him to have cell coverage, this is the
worst!

“Did you call them? Okay, good. No, its fine.
Just calm down. We don’t want you going into labor early, Rebecca.
I’ll be there soon. Yep...bye.” Jeff hung up the phone and turned
back to me.

“Ari, I promise you that I’ll be back
tonight. We’ll talk then, baby, but I have got to go now.”

He leaned down to kiss me, but I stepped back
away from him.

“Ari, please don’t do this to me.”

“It’s me or her.”

“What?”

“I said…it’s me or her. You decide right now,
Jeff. If you walk away from me, you are deciding on Rebecca and
this baby that you don’t even know if it’s yours, or you stay here
with me and our future.”

He just stared at me.

“Ari, you can’t do this to me. I love you,
but if this baby is mine and I just walked away from him…do you
know what you’re asking me to do?”

“It’s me or her.”

“Oh fuck, Ari. I don’t have time for this
bullshit game. I’ll be back tonight, and we’ll talk then.”

He turned and walked away from me.

The moment he rounded the
corner, I fell to my knees and started crying.
Oh. My. God. He left me.

He left. I put my hand to my stomach and
cried so hard that I could hardly breathe.

He left…us.

***

I slowly started to walk out
of the barn. Heading back up toward the house, I could see a few
people dancing on the dance floor that Gunner, Josh and Jeff had
made. Taylor Swift’s song, “The Moment I Knew,” was playing.
Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, what a perfect song to
play right now
.

My head was spinning.
I knew he would pick her over me. I knew
it.

I looked out to the dance floor and saw Josh
and Lynda dancing together. I looked over at Heather and I saw a
tear run down her face. Oh hell no. She was not going to fall apart
in front of him.

Rushing over, I grabbed Heather’s hand and
pulled her up.

“Fuck no, you don’t! You will not cry over
that fucker!” I practically shouted at Heather.

Heather took one look at me and sucked in a
breath of air. “Oh my god, Ari, you’ve been crying.”

While I led her toward the barn, Heather kept
trying to get me to stop walking. By the time we got there, she
yanked her hand from mine and came to a dead stop.

“Ari, what the hell is going on?” I looked at
her and lost it. She ran over to me and pulled me into her
arms.

“It’s okay, sweets. It’s okay.” Heather just
kept repeating herself it over and over again.

“Heather? Ari? What’s wrong?”

Ellie’s voice just sent me
into another fit.
Oh my
god
. I felt Heather moving down with me to
the ground.