Saving Grace (15 page)

I stormed out of my room and made my way into the living room to grab my coat. Shane was pacing back and forth in front of the couch and Conner was sitting on one of the chairs. Whatever their conversation was, it stilled as soon as I walked in.

Shane's eyes raked over my legs, my hips, my arms, dragging them slowly over the rest of my body. "Oh God," he whispered as his hands clenched and unclenched at his sides and all I wanted to do was run to him.
Those icy cold blue eyes had me paralyzed and I swore I felt my panties melting down my legs.
God, what that man can do to my insides with one of his looks.

The sound of the doorbell made my mouth d
ry and I ran to open it so I wouldn
't hear it agai
n. Ryan leaned against the door
jamb with a wide smile.

"Man, you look beautiful
,
Grace," he said pushing off of the door.

A sharp pounding
headache
burst from behind my eyes and I clamped my teeth down from the pain. Behind
me,
I could hear Conner and Shane yelling. The words were all jumbled together like they were stumbling drunkenly to my ears. All I heard was the anguish tone of them. Then Shane pushed through the front door, I leaned back to let him through. As he stepped
by,
he reached his arm past my waist and thrust a wrapped condom into one of my closed fists. He brushed himself against my hip, leaned in close, glaring at me right in the eyes. Time seemed to slow down at that moment like we were locked eye to eye forever. For an eternity, and I knew what an eternity was. He slowly brought his lips to my ear, "Just pull the fucking trigger on me now,
please
." His warm breath sent shivers along my neck. It made me remember his touch on my skin, his lips on mine. That damn man ruined all other men for me, with those freaking lips that you can forget people in.
He could easily erase all my heartache if he wanted to.

I could feel the heat of his body against mine. It felt like an inferno blazed from inside his chest.

"Hey
,
Shane," Ryan said.

Shane did nothing but shove his hands in his pockets and storm off down the street. Conner was through the door the next second, flying down the stairs after him.

Ryan tugged on his ear
and chuckled, "Everything okay?"

My eyes were still on Shane as Conner caught up to him. They walked to the corner of the block together and then disappeared from my sight.

Ryan waited for my reply, puffed out his cheeks with air and blew it out.

I looked at him for the first time since I opened the door. My head shook back and forth and my heart thudded in my chest slow but hard and loud. There
were very few things I was sure of at that moment. One, I did not feel like eating anymore. Two, Ryan was not Shane. Three, my palms were sweating from holding onto the door so hard. Four, Ryan was
definitely
not Shane.

"Ryan, I'm so sorry. But, I don't think it's a good idea that we go out tonight." I bit my bottom lip when I watched his lips turn down into a frown. "I think there are some things I have to work out with Shane. I'm sorry, but I'm not one of those girls who would lead someone on if I knew I had feeling
s
for someone else."

"Yeah,
oka
y,
Grace. If you change your mind though, or if he messes up
,
give me a call." I didn't watch Ryan walk away. I closed the door and sat down heavily on the floor.

Oh, crap. I was
starting to have
real
feelings for
Shane Maxton, and I had no idea what to do about it.

"Gray? Grace? What's wrong?" Lea ran down the hall to me and threw herself on the floor. "What the hel
l did I miss? I always miss stuff
!"

"Nothing. I'm going to change. I'll be out in a minute," I whispered and walked to my room.

Turning the knob on my door, I pushed the door open with my hip and was half way in the room when I felt the drop in temperature. I stepped in further and the door slammed shut by itself behind me. Gabriel leaned against the far wall of my room, arms folded across his chest; his eyes closed.

I threw my coat on the mattress and flung the crunched up condom on the floor. I stalked towards him
with my
fists shaking. My stomach slammed against the walls of my body and a sharp pain seared through my jaw from clenching my teeth so tightly. "Leave."

Gabriel's eyes blinked open, his stoic expression k
illing all my thunder. "I miss
you."

"You're delusional. Get out." I turned my back to him.
Stupid me
.
I was slammed flat on my face across my mattress, all the air knocked out of my lungs. I
struggled to move, to lift up my body, but I couldn't, Gabriel's cold steel body was straddled over mine. All my muscles tightened waiting for the blow, the hit, anything.

But, Gabriel just ran his hand gently over my back and through my hair. Vomit burned the back of my throat and tears filled my eyes. The minute I could break free, I was going to kill him
.
How do you kill an angel? Put him in sunlight, shove garlic in his face,
throw water on him...what
?

He clutched a handful of my
hair, tugged my head off the mattress, pulled his face to my ear,
and breathed in deeply. In a blur of
motion,
he flipped my entire body over so I was now laying flat on my back. One of his hand
s still ha
d my hair as the other on
e pushed itself up my leg. Both
his knees pinned my arms against my body as his lips skimmed over my neck. A
pure thick
,
black darkness seeped through my skin down to my bones when he gently placed his lips to mine. I clamped my mouth shut, but it made no difference, the visions came.

My beloved angel walking away from me, lounging on his wings in the heavens, and
Shane
.
Shane in between the legs of countless women, his eyes burning with lust. Then there was Gabriel, his gentle touch, his warm kisses, his love, "You're my heart, Grace."

I squirmed beneath him and the minute my lips broke
free,
I turned my head and vomited all over my sheets. "Get off
m
e,
Gabriel," I heaved. "The way that you have destroyed my heart, just proves that you don't have one." I
spit,
shoved and bucked under him loosening his hold until I finally struggled free. When my right hand broke
free,
I pulled back and punched him in the face. I twisted myself up and kicked him as hard as I could.

He grabbed a hold of my wrist, trying to tug me back to him.

"
Sto
p,
Gabriel! Just stop!" I pushed him away. "I get to live this life! I get it! You can't hurt me anymore. I will fight you to the end of this life, Gabriel. And, when it's the end
,
I get to go to heaven this time. You want to kill me now? I get to
him
faster!"

"Grace. It would be very prudent of you to fear me."

"Oh, go to hell
,
Gabriel! What are you going to do
,
flap your wings around and throw your halo at me? Oh, I'm shaking in fear. Really."

His lips pulled up into a snarl, "I can make your last life hell, Love."

"All my lives have been hell
,
Gabriel, one more
ain't
going to break me."
The slamming open of the front door
of my apartment made Gabriel
chuckle
and
then as I blinked my eyes, he disappeared.

Night had fallen and dark shadows danced against the walls of my room. My alarm clock lay upside down, but I could still read the numbers 12:04. Somehow seven hours had passed.

I changed into
a small tank top and boy shorts, threw my sheets into the hamper,
and listened at my door to the voices coming from down the hall. Whatever was going on out there had made Gabriel leave.

A light knock on my door
rattled the wood against my eav
e
s
dropping ears. "Grace, are you awake?" Lea called.

I opened the door and stuck my head out. Lea was in almost the same matching sleepwear as me. Her head nodded towards the kitchen. "I'm
gonna
need some help tonight." She pulled my arm, dragged me into the living room and held her hands out to show me what was going on. Conner was attempting to do a headstand against the wall and Shane had made a pillow tent on the floor with all the cushions from our couch. The apartment smelt like burnt cookies.

Conner fell on his head and giggled, "There's my beautiful girlfriend. Shane. Shane?
Sha
...ne?
Where the frig is Shane?"

Shane popped his head out of the cushions and waved like an imbecile, "I'm in my fort."

Conner crawled towards the
pillow fort
and looked up at me, "Uh oh, Shane. Look who's
here.
Shane? Shane?" he whispered. "Dude, ask her to get in the fort with you."

"Okay, that's enough. Come
o
n,
Conner, let's go to bed," Lea said pulling him up off the floor. He stumbled drunkenly against the wall giggling and slid against the wall down the hallway with Lea helping him walk.
"Grace, Shane really, really, really likes you...
,"
he drunkenly sang.

Lea looked back at me with a small tight smile. "You got Shane?"

I tried to smile back but I don't think it reached my lips, "Yeah
,
sure." I turned my head back to the pillows as they all crumbled around him.

He looked up at
me, stared blankly,
and slurred
, "God
,
Grace, you're so fucking exquisite."

I wanted to wrap that moment up in tissue paper and save it forever someplace near my heart, just so I could take it out and look at it when the world was too harsh. The beautiful drunk boy in the pillow fort in my living room tell
ing
me I was exquisite. My eyes welled with tears and I needed to take a deep breath of air, yeah that moment was perfect.

I walked over to him and started putting the pillows b
ack on the couch as he sat there
and watched me. I opened one of the closets where we keep extra pillows and sheets and fixed the couch for him to sleep on. He staggered to his feet and collapsed on the couch
,
pulling me down sitting me next to him. He pulled his tee shirt off and threw it on the coffee table. He leaned back against the pillows of the couch and touched his hand to mine.

"How was your date?" he slurred.

I looked down at his fingers softly stroking the skin of my mine and I entwined his fingers in mine. "I didn't go."

He lay
down along the couch and pulled me into his arms laying me again
st his body. "I know I'm
drunk as
hel
l,
Grace, but, just stay with me. I need you like I fucking need to breat
he
."

"Shane..."

Softly he placed his lips on the nape of my neck, just below my ear, inhaled deeply and kissed me. "Shut up and go to sleep, Grace."

Another moment to
keep
safe...
because this...this felt so perfect
.

The plan was to leave for Lea's parents at ten o'clock. We were going to drive the Jeep there and leave it, I barely used it and alternate side of the street parking for street cleaning in Manhattan was a pain in the neck.

I slid off the couch around nine that morning and jumped in the shower. I dressed in a simple pair of black yoga pants and a tight pale pink thermal long sleeved shirt. I twisted a tie into my ha
ir and donned a long thick pony
tail. I bounced out of my room at the first scent of coffee.

Conner and Shane both sat at the kitchen table holding their head in their hands. Lea leaned up against the counter with a wide grin on her face.

"GOOD
MORNIN
G,
BOYS!" I yelled at the top of my lungs. Conner cringed and Shane lifted his blood shot eyes at me shaking his head.

"You're pure evil," Shane whispered letting his head collapse back onto his arms.

Conner looked back
and forth between
Lea
and
me, "Why the hell are you guys up so early on a Sunday making a racket waking us up?"