Saving Sunni (25 page)

Nobody said a word as they stared at each other, although I saw a few humorous glances pass between the others at the table. I stifled a nervous giggle and concentrated on staying inconspicuous.

In the end, Mary won the contest. Roger sighed, disgusted, and sat back down.

“All I’m saying is I’m sick of this,” he said petulantly. “How long do we have to put up with this bullshit?”

“As long as we indulge in a lifestyle that is neither understood nor accepted,” Sir told him. “None of us have exactly played it safe in life, and these are the risks you take. We have had some bad publicity, it is true.” He nodded at Mary, who was back in her chair. “But we have also been given a fantastic opportunity lately to educate many people about our way of life. Now is not the time to back down and crawl underneath a rock. If we are going to be leaders in this community, we need to be open and honest about who we are. If we act like we must pretend to be who we are not, then people will assume we have things to hide. I, for one, am tired of hiding.”

Charlie clapped fervently and the rest of the table, except Roger, nodded in agreement. Mary tapped the table thoughtfully and gave Sir a shrewd look.

“Nicely stated,” she said, catching his eye. “Roger, all we will ask of you right now is to not make any announcements about cancelling Decadence. I am sure we can come to some kind of understanding, and as Delilah said, you do not have to be any more involved than you decide to be. The rest of us have all worked on Decadence for years and we can easily run things while you recover from the recent unpleasantness.” She looked around the table with a sardonic air.

Roger grunted and glowered but didn’t reply. The conversation went on around him. It sounded like Roger hadn’t really been all that involved in Decadence anyway, except maybe to interfere with the people who really planned and ran it. Now that he was at least pretending he didn’t care about it, the planning meeting actually went smoothly.

After another hour of discussion about how best to increase attendance and deal with possible media attention, the group stood up and said their goodbyes. Roger nodded curtly to the group in general and stumped out the door. Mary watched him brush past her and shook her head.

“He’s going to pout for a while, but he’ll think about what we said,” she predicted wryly as the door slammed behind him. “Either he’ll pull his head out of his ass and get back in the game, or he’ll drop out of the scene altogether. Any bets?”

Charlie waved his hand dismissively in the direction of the door. “I hope he does drop out. He’s been a wet blanket ever since he found out Portia de Rossi was gay.”

Sir stood by the door giving hugs or handshakes as his guests left, and Mary surprised me by helping clear the table. Not that I hadn’t seen her tidy up in the dungeon, but most dominants didn’t bother to do that kind of thing when there were submissives present. Since the submissives were often very service-oriented and loved waiting on people, that wasn’t usually a problem. But tonight Mary chatted with me as we carried plates and coffee cups into the kitchen and loaded the dishwasher.

It became apparent why she was staying when we came out of the kitchen to see Sir saying goodbye to Matthew and closing the door behind him.

“Rune, we need to have a chat,” Mary told him, leading him efficiently back to the kitchen table. She took a chair and looked at him expectantly. “Do you have a couple more minutes?”

Sir put aside his surprise and nodded as if she had actually given him an option. “Of course, Mary. Do you mind if I have the girls join us?”

“By all means.” Mary refused my offer of more coffee as Sir stuck his head into the living room and asked sage to come in.

When we were all present, Mary turned her attention fully on Sir. “I want to say, first of all, that I admire the stand you took tonight.”

“The stand I took?” he repeated.

“Yes. What you said about the need for the leaders in our community to be open and honest about who and what they are.” She leaned forward fractionally, placing her forearms on the table. “Did you mean that?”

He blinked. “Yes, I did. Our society is much more open to alternative lifestyles than before, but we have a long way to go yet. I understand the need for secrecy when someone has a very public job and a family to support.” He looked back at me and sage, standing behind his chair in case he wanted anything, and motioned to us to sit down. “I just found out I have already lost my job, so I have less to risk than most at the moment. We are already facing a change in our lifestyle, so this could be an interesting adventure.”

“I’m sorry to hear about your job.” Mary sat back. “I don’t know if this will help with that or not, but there is someone I would like you to meet with this week. I am not at liberty to tell you who it is, or what they are trying to do, but I will tell you this: they are looking for someone who is willing to go public about their identity and their lifestyle. I think you would be an excellent candidate for this project, but the three of you will need to discuss exactly how public you’re willing to go. You have many things to consider, such as your career, your immigration status, and your income requirements. Before you talk to this person, you need to think about what changes you’re willing to make and how much risk you can handle. When would you be able to decide if you want to come to a meeting?”

Sir took a deep breath. “Girls, this has not been an easy process. We’ve all had huge amounts of stress lately, and we do not seem to be out of the woods yet. I am inclined to go to this meeting and explore whatever options it opens up to us. It may mean more stress and more risk, however. Do you have an issue with that?”

sage immediately shook her head and Sir turned to look at me. I wasn’t sure how much more stress and risk I could handle, but this might be a great opportunity for Sir. Or it would get him thrown out of the country permanently. At this point, it didn’t seem like it could do any more damage.

“We might as well see what it’s about,” I said, trying to smile and look optimistic.

Sir nodded at Mary. “Yes,” he said formally. “Please set up this meeting. If you think we can be of service to the community in some way, I am more than willing to listen.”

Chapter 25

I was surprised to find Geri sitting in her office on Thursday morning when I came in. She got up and came over to give me a big hug, but she didn’t give her usual impression of a spastic butterfly. It was obvious that she still wasn’t recovered from her heart attack. She was subdued, and she wore a pink track suit with almost no jewelry other than giant hoops that hung from her ears almost to her shoulders.

“It’s good to see you back,” I said cautiously as she released me and immediately went to sit down again, leaning back and closing her eyes briefly as if the activity had worn her out. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine, honey.” She smiled cheerfully, but there was something sad and worn-out about her face. Even her hands rested quietly in her lap, not tossing papers around at random on her desk like they would normally have been doing. I made us some tea and sat down in the guest chair, remembering the first time I sat there with her. A wave of sadness washed through me to see her looking so much older and more tired than she had that day.

“Have you been wearing yourself out?” I asked her, trying to adopt the stern motherly tone that I knew she would have used if the situation were reversed.

She picked up her tea and sipped it thoughtfully. I had expected a vigorous denial, but she only sighed. Her hands shook slightly as she set the mug back down on the desk.

“Maybe just a wee bit, but I had to come down and see my little family. I felt so bad knowing that I was leaving you all to deal with the store.”

“Do you want to see the records from when you were gone?” I asked, turning to pull out the notebooks where Debi and I had kept track of everything we thought seemed important. “We’ve been getting in a few job applications, but Tina wanted some more hours so we’ve been covered pretty well.”

“No, honey. I’d like you to make the hiring decision, and I trust your judgment.” She sounded tired and a little forlorn, and I wondered if it would be better to make it sound like the place was falling apart without her. But I didn’t want her overexerting herself, either. I hesitated, then put the notebook back.

“Well, we can go over all of that when you’re feeling better,” I said, sitting back down. “You just relax and drink your tea. Don’t plan on staying all day. We’ll need you at full speed as soon as possible to fix all of the mistakes we’re making. But we don’t need to start on that today. I think the store can survive until you’re rested up and ready to take over again.”

“I’m sure you girls are doing just fine.” Geri giggled a little. I must have struck the right note.

“So tell me about your ex,” she said, happier now that the actual work could be put off until another day. “Has he been back?”

“I haven’t talked to him for a while,” I said. “I don’t know what he’s up to. He may have given up the whole thing, but Sir won’t believe it. He’s positive I’m going to be abducted any minute now.”

“Well, I can’t blame him, really,” she said, giving me a flirty smile. “I would hate to lose you, too.”

I gave her a small hug. “That’s sweet of you, Geri.”

She patted my arm. “I want to ask you a question, sweetie.” Her face lost all of its giddy flirtatiousness. “I know that you grew up in a religious family.” She was more serious than I’d ever seen her before, and I nodded. “What did you do to get away from it?”

“Well, I quit going to church after I got married,” I told her slowly, surprised by the question and wondering what she was trying to get at. “I just never went back to it.”

She tilted her head at me, like a small, wise chickadee. “But did you ever actually think through what you really believe?”

I frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Well, religion is kind of like eating,” she said. “The older you get, the more comforting it is to have the kind of food you had as a child. For most people, anyway. That’s why retro stuff is so popular. People like to feel the way they did when they were young. It masks the fear of getting old, I think. The same goes for religion. If you just reject your parents’ religion, you will find yourself more and more drawn back toward it as you get older. It feels like home, maybe. Unless you take the time to work out for yourself what makes sense to you—what your natural beliefs are.”

We sat in silence for a few minutes, thinking over what she’d said.

“That’s why I’ve been a little worried about you,” she finally continued. “Randy is a good-looking boy, and the attraction to go back to that life may be strong—stronger than you realize. But he won’t stick with it. Am I correct that he was
not
raised in a religious home?”

I nodded at her, smiling.

She smiled back. “That’s also why I’m not too worried about Melissa. She’s going through a phase now, like he is, but I don’t think it’s as deep with her as she thinks it is. I raised her to defy authority, and that’s what she’s doing—defying
me
. It’s okay, because I know that she needs to travel her own path. But she knows how to think for herself and eventually she’ll get tired of being a sheep. But you—you can’t let yourself get lazy, sunni. Think about your situation, all of it. Decide what you want, what is acceptable to you and what isn’t, what your life is
about
. Take your stand. That might be to Randy, or Rune, or even me.” She chuckled. “There’s nothing wrong with being the bad guy when it pushes someone to find their own path. I’ve pissed off enough people in my life to know
that.
”

She absently stared into her tea mug, as if she could see her life reflected in it. She smiled dreamily as she lifted her head. “So tell me, what’s happening with your sir? Does he think he’ll be deported?”

“He could be,” I said miserably. “He was fired yesterday. He had been getting close to getting his citizenship, but with the investigation and the news stories…Anything could happen. Debi’s dad is looking into helping him with that.”

She looked at me shrewdly. “Are you thinking of marrying him to keep him in the country?”

I sighed. “No. I couldn’t, anyway. My divorce from Randy hasn’t gone through. And I think if he married anybody, it would probably be sage. They have more in common that he and I do. But he hasn’t said anything about doing that. He did say if he has to get another job, it probably wouldn’t be in Denver. I feel like everything is falling apart. I don’t really want to leave Colorado, but if he moves I wouldn’t want to break up with him, either. I just wish something would happen to make everything better.”

“And what would that be?”

“Oh, you know, winning the lottery or something. If we didn’t have to worry about money, the rest of it wouldn’t be such a big deal.”

We heard Debi coming into the store, and we got up to go and greet her. They did some “Oh, I missed you so much!” squealing, hugging, and small talk, and then Geri turned back to me.

“We weren’t done with our discussion,” she said, pushing me back toward her office. I started to protest that I needed to get to work, but Geri pointed to the chair I’d been sitting in and sank back into her own with a sigh.

“Now, what about the rest of it is a big deal?” She sounded genuinely interested, and I knew she must be or she wouldn’t have dragged me back in here with her. Debi wandered into the office, a cup of tea in her hand, and leaned against the wall. I considered trying to change the subject, but I didn’t think that Geri would let me. She didn’t seem to mind if Debi listened in, and I was too worn out to really care.