Scattered Colors (30 page)

It couldn’t have been a coincidence that we were so close. I refused to believe that. Not when Freya taught me that everything in life happened for a reason. There was a reason why Caleb’s ad for a roommate was the first one I’d run across in my search for an apartment. There was a reason why everything fell into place so seamlessly and why the two of us hit it off so well. And that reason was the girl standing outside the front door right then. I could hear her laughter echoing from the breezeway and that beautiful melodic sound set fire to my blood, stoking the flames of my need for her that had been smoldering beneath the surface for so long.

It took every ounce of willpower I had in me not to drop the box in my hands and rush to her, hold her so tightly she could never get away. I knew my arrival would more than likely be an unwelcome one, but I had spent years preparing myself for this very moment…or so I thought.

Every speech I had prepared in my head went up in a puff of smoke with just the sound of her voice. I couldn’t remember anything past my incessant need to touch her,
feel
her. I couldn’t see her yet. I needed time to formulate a plan. I should have been bracing myself against the fallout that was bound to occur once she finally saw me. But I couldn’t let myself think like that. I couldn’t allow myself to believe there was any other possible conclusion than us being together. For two miserable fucking years, I’d been living in darkness, my life a black hole that had sucked me down into its abyss. I wasn’t living if I didn’t have her; I was barely existing. And it wasn’t enough, not anymore.

Not ever again.

“Hey, man, you just gonna stand there all day or you planning on actually moving your shit in?”

I’d been so lost in thought I hadn’t heard Caleb come back into the apartment. Luckily, he was alone.

“Sorry, just got a little sidetracked, I guess. Heard you talking to someone out there, that a neighbor?” I asked, hoping like hell it came off casual. I couldn’t help myself. I was desperate to know anything and everything about Freya in the years I’d lost her.

“Oh, yeah. That was Freya. She lives upstairs with my girlfriend.” A warm smile took over his face as he spoke. “Those two together are volatile, man. I’m telling you. You get on one’s bad side and you’ll have both to answer to.”

That didn’t exactly bode well for me. I already knew I was going to have my work cut out for me when it came to Freya. I couldn’t imagine how much worse it was going to be with her best friend at her back.

“That sounds a little ominous,” I hedged, eager to keep the conversation going, needing to lean anything and everything I could.

“Nah, not really. Piper’s a handful, but I got no problems keeping my grip on her. And Freya’s fantastic, really. They’re just protective of each other. Piper more so. When Freya first moved here, she was a wreck. I’m talking full-on disaster. It took a while for Pipe to get in there and get her to open up, but once she did, those two became joined at the hip.”

My stomach dropped as unimaginable sadness washed over me. I’d done that to her. I was the reason she was a disaster when she moved here. I didn’t think it was possible for me to hate myself any more than I did right at that moment.

“We’re actually going out tonight for her birthday once I get you all moved in,” Caleb continued, thankfully oblivious to my fluctuating mood. “She said to bring you along if you’re up for it.”

“Yeah,” I answered a little too eagerly. I quickly cleared my throat and tried to cover my excitement with an impassive expression. “Yeah, sounds good.”

“Cool. Well then, let’s get the rest of your stuff. I’m going to need a drink after this.”

He wasn’t the only one.

I could see her.

I stood at the edge of the dance floor completely mesmerized by the seductive sway of her hips as she moved, the way her eyes closed as she danced with abandon. Christ, she still had the power to steal my breath. She looked so different yet just as beautiful as the day I’d met her. Gone was the seventeen-year-old girl I’d fallen in love with. Freya Linden had turned into a woman, a gorgeous, curvy, intoxicating woman. Her hair was much shorter than I remembered, barely passing her shoulders, but the silky chestnut color still shined with hints of red under the lights. My palms itched and my fingers trembled with the need to touch her. I was seconds away from charging onto that floor just so I could wrap her in my arms and feel those full, smiling lips pressed against mine.

Jesus, just watching her dance had my body responding in ways it only ever responded to Freya. I felt myself getting harder the longer I stared, the zipper of my jeans pressing uncomfortably against my growing erection. The need to bury myself in her tight, warm body was almost palpable. I’d never needed a woman in my life the way I needed Freya.

Just as I took a step forward her eyes popped open and what I saw stopped me in place. Those dazzling azure eyes of her were lit up like a Christmas tree, so full of laughter and light my heart momentarily stalled in my chest. I never thought I’d see those blue eyes again, but to see them so full of life was an answer to every single one of my prayers. She was happy. Thank God, she was happy. Even though I’d lived a pathetic, miserable existence since the day she left, I had always hoped that wherever she was, she was truly happy.

Caleb’s hand on my shoulder jolted me from my reverie and back into the jam-packed club. “Dude, first round’s on you since I helped you move.”

I laughed. “You got it. What am I ordering?”

“Bud for me, margarita for Pipe, and a G&T for Freya.”

With a lift of my chin, I headed in the direction of the bar, the whole way lamenting the fact that I wouldn’t have been able to guess my girl’s drink preference while Caleb probably knew things about her that I didn’t. I hated that. I couldn’t stand that I no longer knew Freya better than anyone else. What else was there that I needed to learn about her? Just how much—if any—had she changed over the last few years?

My mood darkened somewhat as I sidled up to the bar and shuffled my way to the front, lifting a hand to get the bartender’s attention.

“What can I get you, handsome?” the pretty redhead asked in a low, husky voice as she leaned over the bar, putting her cleavage on display. Every guy within a few feet of her reacted accordingly…everyone but me that was. As I rattled off my drink order, I couldn’t help but let my eyes wander back over to the dance floor where I last saw Freya dancing with her tiny, blonde friend. My breath caught in my throat when I saw the two of them clasp hands and begin winding their way through the other dancers, heading straight for the table I’d just walked away from. It seemed like I stood at that bar for an eternity waiting on our drinks. Freya was only yards away from me. I was only moments away from speaking to her for the first time in years.

My body began to shake with adrenaline as the bartender lined up my drinks, shooting me a coy smile. All I could manage in return was a simple lift of the chin before slapping a couple bills down and grabbing my order, trying desperately not to spill anything as my hands trembled uncontrollably. Sucking in a deep breath through my nose, I squeezed my eyes shut and exhaled slowly. Several seconds later, I’d somehow miraculously managed to get myself under control.

Every step toward Freya was like a step back into the light. Somehow, I managed not to trip and fall on my face as she reached back and brushed her much shorter hair over her shoulder, exposing the creamy expanse of her neck. My jaw ticked as I clenched my teeth together.

Another step.

Her little blonde friend’s eyes traveled from Freya and landed on me, growing wide before she mumbled something I couldn’t hear.

Another step
.

Caleb leaned in and kissed the tip of his girlfriend’s nose.

Another step.

Freya’s laughter rang out, the sound music to my ears, drowning out the steady thump of the club music.

Another step
.

Caleb lifted his head in my direction, “Guys, I want you to meet my new roommate…” but I couldn’t pay attention to a single word he said. Just then, my world turned around in her chair, flashing those bright blue eyes at me and, for the first time in two years, I could breathe again. I could hear the shallow gasp as shock spread across her face. I always imagined what I’d say to her the first time I saw her, but when I opened my mouth every apologetic, pleading word I’d played over in my mind disappeared. I was struck dumb with just one look. She’d knocked me senseless in the blink of an eye, so I said the only thing that came to mind.

“Hey there, gorgeous.”

My brain and body disengaged from each other, neither knowing how to handle the fact that Parker Owens was standing in front of me. I shot up from my chair only to stand frozen in place. I couldn’t think of a single coherent thing to say other than the wheezed, “Parker,” that passed my lips. The sound of my own frantic heartbeat pounded in my ears, drowning out the voices and music around me. I had to have been losing my mind. This couldn’t be happening. It wasn’t until he took a step closer and uttered the words that completely undid me that I was able to function once again.

“God, gorgeous. I’ve missed you.”

“Stop,” I breathed as I took a step back, away from his outreached hand, trying my hardest not to notice the look of longing in his expressive eyes.

“Freya—”

“No!” I yelled, slapping my hands over my ears to keep his voice out. I couldn’t let myself hear it. That deep, gravelly voice sent a familiar shock through my system and I couldn’t risk hearing it anymore.

“Freya? Are you okay?” I heard the worry in Piper’s voice just as she reached up to pull my hands down. I blinked rapidly, trying to clear my blurry vision as I turned and looked down at the concern in my friend’s whisky-colored eyes but couldn’t find the words to placate her. I wasn’t okay. I was so far from okay I was in a completely different stratosphere.

I turned back to Parker. “Why the hell are you here, Parker?”

“Wait…your ex?” Piper cut in but I couldn’t respond. I was too focused on the man standing in front of me.

“Why are you
here
?” I demanded.

“Gorgeous,
please
…”

“Stop calling me that.” I had to shut my eyes against the onslaught of emotion at just seeing him again.

“What’s going on?” Caleb asked, coming around the table to stand with the rest of us.

It felt like Parker’s eyes were burning into me, able to see every single thing I was feeling inside just like the first time we met.

“Freya, please,” Parker pleaded. “Can we just talk…please?”

“This can’t be happening,” I mumbled to myself, raking my hands through my hair. “You can’t be here. My life is good, Parker. I’m finally happy! Why the hell did you come here?” Hot tears burned the backs of my eyes and I began to pace. It felt like everything I’d worked for had been stripped away. All of a sudden, I was that sad girl back in Sommerspoint with a crushed heart. I hated that I allowed that sad, broken girl to be resurrected by just the sight of him. I was stronger than that, damn it!

“I came here for you,” he answered softly. “I transferred here to be near you.”