SEAL's Bride: A Secret Baby Romance (16 page)

S
awyer upended
the tumbler of whiskey, draining the last drops and crunching the ice cubes. He was a little drunk, a little jet-lagged, and extremely fucking confused about the argument he’d had with Remy.

He sat up at the sleek black marble bar, an amenity of his hotel that he’d only just discovered. After he checked Remy’s room and found her gone, he’d come down here for a drink.

Which turned into three.

“There you are.”

He looked up to find Merissa sliding onto the bar stool beside him, wearing a skimpy little lace number. She leaned close, making sure he got an eyeful of her cleavage, then put her hand on his thigh.

“Merissa,” he said, removing her hand. “Speak of the Devil.”

“Oh, you flatter me,” she said, laughing. She was very proud of her dazzling white smile and her big fake tits, making the most she could of both. It worked on most men, always got her what she wanted.

Hell, it had worked on him for half a year.

Today, though, he looked at Merissa and just thought…
phony
.

“Why are you here?” he asked.

“You texted me last night.”

“Yeah, because I wanted to tell you in person that I’m with someone else,” he said, raising his hand to the bartender to order another round.

“Hmm, and yet….” Merissa glanced around. “No cute little country blonde present. What happened, you two have a fight?”

She pretended to pout, leaning close again to flash her half-bared breasts at him.

“Yeah. Thanks for that, by the way.”

“Sounds like a fairweather friend.”

He gave Merissa a sharp look. “You don’t know shit about it. That woman’s been through hell and back on my account.”

“Puh-lease,” Merissa said, rolling her eyes.

“She had my baby. Never asked me for anything. Not that you’d understand that.”

Merissa’s expression turned sullen. “I never asked you for anything, either.”

“No, but that didn’t stop you from meddling, did it?”

“How could I have known that I was meddling? It wasn’t like you ever told me you were together with someone. Just like you never told me you left D.C.”

He pulled a face, but she was right. “Fine. I’m sorry.”

Merissa’s brows rose. “An apology? Well, color me shocked.”

“I’m trying to learn from my mistakes.”

He knocked back half the whiskey in his glass, winced.

“Yeah, I don’t think you’re really on the righteous path right now,” Merissa said.

“You’re one to talk.”

Merissa’s dark eyes narrowed.

“Yeah,” Sawyer said. “I know you were Darren’s mistress, Merissa. I’m not stupid.”

Hurt flashed on her face. “You don’t know anything about it.”

“I know that you cared about him, and that he chose his wife and new baby over you.”

“Excuse me, bartender!” she called. “I’ll have what he’s having.”

“See, the righteous path is harder than it looks,” Sawyer said.

“Don’t gloat. It’s not a good quality for a father.”

Sawyer almost choked on the next sip of his drink.

A father
, she’d called him. She wasn’t wrong, of course. It was just… he’d never considered himself that way before.

“Can I give you some advice?” Merissa asked.

He slid her a glance. “Do I have a choice?”

“No.”

“Go ahead,” he said with a shrug.

“Your blonde. Do you love her?”

He sat his glass down a little harder than he intended.

“It’s complicated.”

“No, it’s not. Not talking about the fact that she had your kid, or whatever past you have together. Do you love her? Could you spend your life with her?” Merissa asked, pinning him with an intense expression.

He thought about it. Remy was beautiful and kind. She was smart and funny, and determined. She cared about him, her capacity for love seemingly endless. When he was with her, he felt… lighter. Happier.

So yeah, maybe the whole kid and family thing was still stressing him the hell out. Enough that he couldn’t even delve into his feelings surrounding being a father, not quite yet.

But just Remy, herself?

“Yeah,” he said at last. “I love her.”

“Then what the hell are you doing here?” Merissa asked. “If you love someone, you don’t let anything or anyone keep you apart. Me and Darren? We had problems that couldn’t be fixed. You, though? From where I’m sitting, all you have to do is reach out and take what you want.”

He stared at her, dumbstruck for a minute. “Jesus. That’s… like, inspirational.”

“I’m fucking Yale educated,” Merissa said, standing up. “Being hot doesn’t preclude me from being intelligent.”

He couldn’t help the surprised chuckle that escaped his lips. Merissa shot back the last of her whiskey. “Thanks for the drink. Now get out of this bar, go get your girl. Life’s too short to waste sitting around looking like a kicked puppy.”

She turned and strutted off, leaving him more than a little stunned and impressed.

Pulling out his wallet, he tossed cash on the bar, shaking his head.

Damn
. An unlikely source of wisdom, but… she was completely right. If Darren’s tragic passing had any true effect on his life, it should be to remind Sawyer to go after what he wanted, not wait around hoping that happiness would find him one day.

He checked his watch, wondering when the next flight to New Orleans took off.

It was time to take this bull by the horns, confront his fears, and see if he couldn’t make himself and Remy happy.

All he needed was all the courage in the world…

W
ait for me
.

Remy looked at Sawyer’s mysterious text for what had to be about the 1000
^th
time. The morning after she left him in D.C., she woke to find that text.

No explanation, no apology…

Just…

Wait for me.

Every single time she looked at it, the message gave her chills. It’d been six days, not a word from Sawyer, and yet…

A little part of her was just hanging there, anticipating…

Something.

She sighed as she finished preparing Shiloh’s lunch, cut up chicken breast and apple sauce. In her heart, she was still foolishly hoping for that fairy tale ending…

Right now, sitting in front of Shiloh’s high chair and spooning apple sauce into his mouth, she felt more like Cinderella.

“Quit spitting it on your shirt!” she scolded him, her words lacking heat.

Shiloh just grinned and picked up another piece of chicken from his plastic plate, jamming it in his mouth.

“Your manners are seriously lacking, buddy.”

Once he was fed, she took him upstairs to change his clothes. Then she found a splotch of apple sauce on her shirt, and ended up changing her tank top.

Today was just… one of those days. Shiloh was the best kid, but he was still a toddler. He was a miniature tornado, creating a path of destruction and dirty laundry everywhere he went these days.

Her phone buzzed in her pocket as she sorted through her clean t-shirts, trying to keep an eye on Shiloh. He crawled around the floor at her feet, pushing a toy truck around with single-minded determination.

She glanced at her phone.

Sawyer.

Heart suddenly leaping into her throat, she answered.

“Hello?”

“Are you home?” he asked without preamble.

“Ummm, yeah…” she said, grabbing a t-shirt.

“Can I meet you on the front porch in five minutes?”

“I—” she started, then paused. “I guess? It’s just me and Shiloh at the house today, so… he’s with me wherever I am.”

“Even better. See you in five.”

“Okay…” she said.

Disconnecting the call, she frowned at the faded t-shirt in her hand.

“Buddy, I can’t wear this,” she told Shiloh, who ignored her completely.

Digging through her drawers, she found a light blue tank top and a fresh pair of shorts. By the time she’d changed, brushed her hair, and stopped Shiloh from trying to flush his toy truck down the toilet, the doorbell rang.

Stifling a nervous groan, she scooped Shiloh up and carried him downstairs. Opening the front door, she found Sawyer standing there with flowers and a somber expression.

“Um, hi,” she said.

Her heart squeezed when she realized that Sawyer was actually speechless, his gaze locked on Shiloh.

“Shiloh, this is Sawyer,” she told her son, smoothing back the dark, messy mop of his hair.

“Sawyyyyyy,” Shiloh said, trying to say the word.

Sawyer glanced at Remy, clearing his throat. “I want… can he call me Dad?”

Remy felt tears prick her eyes.

“Of course. Shiloh, can you say Daddy?”

“Daddddd,” Shiloh said. He squirmed, wanting to get down.

Remy set him on his feet, grinning when he immediately went to explore the bouquet of lilies that Sawyer held. Sawyer played the moment perfectly, kneeling down and letting Shiloh squish the flowers experimentally.

“Fwower,” Shiloh said, looking up to Sawyer for approval.

Remy saw Sawyer’s throat work, could barely hold it together when she saw how emotional he looked. Sawyer glanced at her, pinning her with that gorgeous hazel gaze.

“He looks so much like Colt and Walker did as kids,” Sawyer said.

“He looks like
you
.”

If there was something sweeter than watching Sawyer interact with Shiloh for the first time, Remy didn’t know what it might be. Shiloh patted Sawyer’s hand, pointing at the flowers.

“Shi, did you smell the flowers?” Remy asked, her voice gone thick.

“Nooooo,” he said, giving her an angelic grin.

“See if they smell good, buddy,” she suggested.

Shiloh crouched down and stuck his whole face in the bouquet, then immediately reared back and sneezed. He toppled over, but Sawyer caught him with one hand, putting him back on balance.

Shiloh looked up at Sawyer and laughed.

They stayed like that for a little while, Sawyer seeming awestruck by Shiloh, Remy watching them both. Feeling like her heart was about to burst, it was so full of joy.

After a while, Sawyer stood again, giving her a look.

“Can we take a drive?” he asked.

“Well, there’s no one to watch Shiloh,” she said, brushing a lock of hair back from her temple.

“I kinda thought he could come with us.”

“Oh! That’s so nice, but… he needs a car seat and stuff,” Remy said, pulling a face.

“I got one.”

Remy couldn’t help the shocked look she gave him.

“You did?”

“Yeah. Took me about an hour to install the thing in my car…” he said with a shrug.

“They’re notoriously difficult to install,” Remy said with a smile.

“So… what do you think? Take a ride into town with me?” he asked again.

“Okay,” Remy said, taking a breath. “Sure, why not.”

It took a minute to gather a bag of Shiloh’s things — it was never as simple as walking out of the house, not with a toddler in tow. Once Shiloh was fastened into the super fancy car seat in Sawyer’s Range Rover, Remy hopped in the front seat.

“Let’s do this thing,” she said, giving him a hesitant smile.

Sawyer gave her a long look, but didn’t say anything. He drove toward town, moving no faster than thirty miles an hour at any point.

“You don’t have to drive like a grandma, you know,” Remy told him.

Sawyer shrugged. “Never driven a car with any kid in the backseat, much less my own kid. Not gonna rush it.”

Remy laughed. “Whatever makes you happy.”

Shiloh started fussing in the back seat after a minute, until Remy turned on the radio. As soon as she tuned into the pop station, he calmed down, bobbing his feet to the music.

“You raised him to like Katy Perry?” Sawyer asked.

“You try telling a kid what to listen to,” Remy said. “See how that goes over.”

Sawyer did grin at that.

“Stubborn, huh?”

“Yep. He’s a Roman man, through and through,” Remy said.

Sawyer drove through town, past The Speckled Hen and the grocery store, past his father’s new house. Remy watched out the window as the town crawled by; Sawyer was driving at a true snail’s pace now, and it was getting harder and harder not to tease him about it.

He pulled up in front of a grassy lot, across from the small K-8 school in town. Sawyer climbed out and made a great show of unbuckling Shiloh, making the toddler laugh by pulling silly faces as he freed him.

“Can I carry you?” Sawyer asked Shiloh.

Shiloh’s brow furrowed, and for a moment Remy thought he’d refuse, turn to her for comfort. Instead, Shiloh just cocked his head and looked at Sawyer expectantly.

“Go ahead,” she said when Sawyer turned to her for reassurance.

Sawyer picked Shiloh up as though he was made of glass. It would’ve been funny, if it didn’t give her a big knot of guilt right in the middle of her chest.

She’d had her reasons, certainly, but keeping Sawyer and Shiloh apart so long… it hadn’t been the right thing to do. Seeing them together like this, she knew that without a trace of doubt.

Sawyer carried Shiloh into the grassy field, regret blatant on his face when Shiloh insisted on being put down.

“Don’t take it personally,” Remy said, giving Sawyer a comforting pat on the shoulder. “He likes to explore.”

Shiloh was already off, crawling around in the grass, exclaiming in delight when he scared a cricket into the air.

“He’s incredible,” Sawyer said, shaking his head. He turned his gaze onto Remy, eyes dark with emotion. “You did a really good job with him, you know? I just wish you hadn’t had to do it alone.”

Remy bit her lip, dropping her gaze.

“That was my own choice, at least partly.”

Sawyer took her hand, lacing her fingers with his.

“You made a mistake. The more I think about it, the more I understand. If I had to make the same choice…” he said.

Remy felt a tear slip down her cheek.

“I was afraid,” she admitted. “I still am. If you wanted, you could take him from me.”

Sawyer reached out and brushed the tear from her cheek.

“Maybe I could try… but I have a feeling you wouldn’t let me.”

Remy smiled and sniffed. “Probably not.”

“I would never put you in that position.”

Remy couldn’t help herself. She flung her arms around Sawyer, hugging him as hard as she could. He chuckled and slid his arms around her, letting her feel the rumble of laughter in his chest.

“Thank you,” she whispered. “For understanding.”

“I think we could both use a little forgiveness, huh?” he said, his breath teasing her neck.

“Yeah,” she agreed, her heart giving a squeeze.

He eased back, looking down at her.”I have something for you.”

Sawyer released her, walking back to his car. He opened the passenger door, dug around for a moment. When he returned, he held a crisp and official-looking document, offering it to her.

Remy took it, scanning it over.

“A deed?” she asked, glancing up at him.

“Yeah. For this lot we’re standing on.”

“Ummm…. why?” she asked.

“You and Shiloh need somewhere to live,” he said, holding up a hand. “This is… call it the first of several acts of contrition.”

“Oh,” she said, confused. “This is nice, Sawyer, but… I don’t want your money…”

“Look, Remy. You’ve done so much, raising Shiloh all by yourself. There’s no way in hell that the mother of my child will ever want for anything, though. I’d be ashamed,” he said, reaching out and taking her hand.

“So… a house,” she said, shaking her head. “It’s just… a lot.”

“It’s not enough,” he insisted.

Remy looked down at the deed again, gathering her courage. “Is it… is the house just for me and Shiloh?”

“Well… if that’s what you want…” he said, giving her a helpless look. “Oh, Remy… don’t cry…”

Her face screwed up, she tried to fight tears.

“What if I want more than that?” she asked, her voice gone to gravel.

“Look…” he said, squeezing her hand. “Remy, don’t cry. Please.”

“I’m trying not to!” she protested. Between the deed in one hand and Sawyer holding the other, there wasn’t much she could do to stop the traitorous tears leaking from her eyes.

She turned her head, surprised to see her parents pull up in their pickup truck. Then Shelby and Larkin… then Micah. Finally she saw Walker’s Escalade, Colt riding shotgun.

“Sawyer?” she asked, looking to him.

“I asked them to join us,” he said. “I hope that’s okay.”

“What is
happening
?” she asked, pleading with him for answers now.

“You’ve been really patient,” he said, releasing her hand so that she could wipe at her face. “Just wait one more minute, okay?”

Behind her, Shiloh squawked and ran over to Remy’s mother, who scooped him up with a happy smile. All around her, her family and Walker’s family approached. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw The Colonel pull up in his Mustang, though he and his mistress didn’t get out of the car.

“Hey Rem,” Shelby said, bounding over to give Remy a hug. “You look like a hot mess right now, girl.”

“Thanks!” Remy said, flustered.

“Are we all here now?” Sawyer asked, looking around.

“Think so,” Remy’s father said, turning to wave to Shiloh, who gave his grandfather a cheesy grin.

“Okay. You ready?” Sawyer asked Remy.

“Me?” Remy asked, going red. “This is your show, soldier. I’m just along for the ride.”

“Damn straight,” he said, giving her a brilliant grin. “Try not to cry, okay?”

He reached in his back pocket and got down on one knee, showing her a black velvet ring box. Remy’s mouth opened in a shocked O, and she plastered her hands over her heart.

“What are you doing?” she asked, eyes wide.

“I’m trying to be romantic. Give me your hand, Remy.”

She looked at Shelby. Her sister rolled her eyes and waved a hand.

Remy turned back to Sawyer, giving him her right hand.

“Other hand,” he said. “You’re terrible at this.”

“Well, I’ve never done this before!” she said, giving him her left hand instead.

“Shhhhh,” Sawyer said, popping open the ring box and liberating a giant diamond ring.

“Oh my god,” Remy moaned.

“Remy…”

“Sawyer!” she squeaked.

“Woman! Let me propose, if you don’t mind.”

Remy tamped her lips together, trying not to dissolve into hysterical, tearful giggles.

“Remy Alice River…” he said, holding her hand in his as he looked up at her, going somber. “Will you marry me?”

“I… yes?” she said, her heart in a tumult.

“You’d better sound a little more sure than that,” he said, giving her a stern look. “This is forever. Do you want to be my wife?”

“Yes!” she said, overcome. “Yes, of course I do!”

He grinned. “Good choice.”

Sawyer slid the ring onto her finger, then stood. Remy almost knocked him over this time, pressing her lips to his. He wrapped his arms around her waist and dipped her backward, then lifted her up off the ground.

She broke the kiss with a laugh, her heart overflowing. When she turned, looking for Shiloh, her mother was waiting to hand him over.

Shiloh in one arm, Sawyer in the other, Remy looked between her two favorite men, awestruck.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone cry this much during a proposal,” Sawyer said, brushing tears from her cheeks.

“Well, maybe no girl has ever been this lucky,” Remy said.

“Delayed gratification,” Sawyer said, “For both of us.”

He hugged her and Shiloh, the three of them suddenly more than they were just a few minutes ago.

“Family,” she said.

Sawyer nodded. “Family.”

After a minute, Sawyer eased back, giving Remy room to go to her mom, her sisters. She ended up hugging everyone, even Walker and Colt, and crying on everyone too.