Sebastian (The Beck Brothers #2) (17 page)

"I don't know. I could feel
it," Sebastian croaked.

"Are you sure that you weren't just
seeing things that weren't actually there because you’re afraid of your
feelings, subconsciously looking for a reason to run?" Henry asked
dubiously.

Sebastian blinked at him, tears running
down his face. "What?" he asked stupidly.

Henry sighed and gave Sebastian a pitiful
look. "Look, Sebastian. You’re my brother, and I love you, but you need to
get your head out of your ass. It's obvious that you love Raelynn, but you are
so fucking scared, that any perceived fuck up on Raelynn's part has you
running. Did you even let her explain?"

Sebastian shook his head. "No, I was
so fucking furious that I just snapped. I told her we were done and got the
hell out of there."

Henry shook his head and sat down behind
his desk. Sebastian took one of the chairs in front of his desk. "I get
that you've been hurt. I couldn't even imagine how I would feel if Claire did
something like that to me. But the thing is, you have someone amazing in your
life, and you might have just blown it. I've seen the way she looks at you, and
there is no way she would cheat on you," Henry said with such confidence
that Sebastian was starting to worry about what he had just done.

"What about Victoria?"
Sebastian asked. "Did you think she would cheat on me?"

Henry shrugged. "She definitely
didn't look at you the way Raelynn does, and she never made you this happy
either. I think you need to let her explain before you write her off."

Sebastian scrubbed his hands over his
face and made an aggravated sound. "I need to think about this
first."

Henry frowned. "What do you need to
think about?"

"Maybe I should just end it anyway,”
he muttered.

"Now why the fuck would you do
that?" Henry snapped angrily.

Sebastian shook his head. "I thought
you would understand," he sighed. "Even if it was a misunderstanding,
it made me realize how stupid I've been for letting it get this far. I promised
myself that I would never let another woman hurt me. And here I am, crying like
a fucking pussy because a woman hurt me. I should just end it now and go back
to fucking a different chick every night. At least that way I'm safe from this
shit."

"Dammit, Sebastian!" Henry
shouted. He slammed his fist on the desk, making Sebastian jump.

"Stop being a fucking baby!
Boo-fucking-hoo! Victoria cheated on you. Get the fuck over it. You have a
woman who is perfect for you, and you want to let her go because some bitch
hurt you in the past? Raelynn has done nothing but be there for you when you
needed her most. Do you really think she would hurt you like that? For fuck’s
sake Sebastian, let your past go so you can move on and live your goddamn life."
Henry snapped, his green eyes were hard and pissed off as they stared at
Sebastian.

Sebastian blinked at his brother.
Well...shit.

"I don't want to hear your fucking
sob story anymore. Get out of here, I've got work to do," Henry muttered
coldly, waving a dismissive hand.

  Struck stupid, Sebastian stood and
headed for the door. He left Henry's office building and got into his truck. He
sat there for a moment and thought about what Henry had said. His brother had
never spoken to him like that before; he was usually understanding and
sympathetic. Now he was pissed at Sebastian because he was acting like an
idiot. He was still living in the past, but Raelynn could be his future if he
just let his past go. He most definitely overreacted at the coffee shop. He
needed to talk to Raelynn, but he needed to be alone for a while to evaluate
his feelings. Sebastian called Bill and told him what happened. He was
understanding and said it was fine to take the day off. Sebastian headed home
where he could think in peace.

Chapter
11

  Raelynn checked her phone - no
missed calls, no texts. After the whole coffee shop incident a few days ago,
Jared had told Raelynn to give Sebastian some time. That he would realize he
overreacted, and come to her, but it happened three days ago. How long would it
take him? She felt horrible and just sick over the whole thing. She should have
tried harder to make him listen. He was so distraught and angry that he
wouldn't let her explain that Jared was her brother-in-law.

  Every time she thought back to it,
she pictured the pure agony on Sebastian's face. She hated that he thought she
had been cheating on him. Funny thing was, she wasn't upset with him for
thinking that. She understood that he just reacted to what he had seen. She had
never given him any reason not to trust her, but she was sure seeing her hug
and kiss another man like that triggered his reaction. That bitch Victoria
really did a number on him. Raelynn hadn't realized how bad until the other
day.

  The time apart made Raelynn
realize something else; she was completely in love with him. She missed him
terribly. She couldn't stop thinking about him. Her heart hurt for him. She
just felt so empty with him gone, as if a part of her was missing. How did she
not notice how far she has fallen? She knew that she cared a lot for Sebastian.
Love crossed her mind a couple of times, but she ignored it, no time to dwell on
it. Maybe that was why she didn't realize, but now she knew for sure. She
didn't want to go another minute without Sebastian. She would give him one more
day, and if he still hasn't called her, she was going after him. No way was she
going to let him get away.

  She laughed to herself and shook
her head. She was such a hypocrite. She nearly walked away from him four months
ago because she didn't want a relationship or get attached to him. Now, here
she was fighting to keep the one man she was hell bent on ignoring.

  They never made their relationship
official. Sebastian was still insistent on not calling her his girlfriend.
Raelynn thought of herself as his girlfriend, though. They acted like a couple
in every other way - they went out together, stayed overnight at each other’s
places, had clothes and toiletries at each other’s houses. They even traded
keys. They were in every way a couple. Yet, Sebastian was still hesitant to
label them as such.

  Raelynn didn't get home until
about 10:00 pm that night. Her heart leapt into her throat when she pulled into
her driveway behind Sebastian's truck. Oh God, she hoped he was here to talk,
and not to get his stuff, or give back her key. She was thinking the former
because he could have taken his things and left before she got home. She turned
off her car and got out. The lights were on in her living room. Sebastian was
obviously waiting inside.

  Raelynn walked in her front door
to find Sebastian sitting on the couch watching TV. He glanced up when she
walked in. He looked like shit. His face was scruffier than normal, his hair
was a mess, and he had dark circles under his eyes - like he hadn't been
sleeping. Raelynn's heart broke all over again. She shut the door, dropped her
purse, and walked over to the couch. She kicked off her shoes before sitting
down next to him and pulling her feet up under her butt.

"Hi," Raelynn said softly,
watching him.

Man, she missed him. She ached to touch
him, but she didn't know how he would react.

"Hey," he murmured, gazing
longingly at her before glancing away.

  Raelynn waited. She knew he had to
be the one to talk first. Sebastian's green eyes lifted to meet hers, still
filled with pain. She wanted so badly to take that look out of his eyes. She
hated that he was hurting like this.

"What's going on with you and
Jared?" Sebastian asked, his voice hoarse. His eyes searched hers.

"Baby, nothing is going on with Jared
and me. Jared is my brother-in-law. He is married to my sister, Bianna. I saw
him sitting in the coffee shop window and just wanted to say hi," Raelynn
answered.

Sebastian frowned in confusion, and then
looked away, as he seemed to be thinking something over. Then he sighed and
cursed, dropping his head back onto the couch. "No wonder his wife looked
so familiar. I'm an idiot," he muttered.

"Did you really think that I would
cheat on you, Sebastian?" Raelynn asked softly, reaching out to brush her
fingers through the short hair above his ear.

Sebastian closed his eyes and sighed
heavily. "No, but seeing you hug Jared like that...I just reacted. All my
fears came to the surface and took over."

Raelynn nodded and continued to stroke
his hair. She missed touching him.

"Jared probably hates me,” Sebastian
scoffed.

Raelynn smiled. "No, if anything he
understands better than I do."

Sebastian snorted. "Yeah,
probably." Sebastian opened his eyes and turned his head to look at her,
trapping her hand between his head and the couch. "I'm sorry. I acted like
a dick."

Raelynn gave him a soft smile. "I'm
sorry, too, for not telling you about Jared sooner."

Sebastian shook his head. "You have
nothing to apologize for. I shouldn't have overreacted like I did," he
said, placing his hand on her thigh, giving it a little squeeze. Do you still
want to be with me even though I'm a self-conscious, jealous asshole who beats
up on your brother-in-law?"

Raelynn chuckled low. "On one
condition," Raelynn said, giving him a pointed look.

Sebastian lifted his head. "Anything,
you name it," he said seriously.

"I want you to start calling me your
girlfriend," Raelynn said.

A slow smile curled Sebastian's sexy
lips. "You got it, girlfriend," he murmured then leaned in for a
kiss.

Raelynn sighed against his lips. She
missed him so much.

"Can I stay the night?"
Sebastian whispered, his lips brushing hers.

"Of course." Raelynn breathed,
wrapping her arms around his neck.

Sebastian groaned and pulled her onto his
lap. He then showed Raelynn just how great make-up sex really was.

~~~~~

  Sebastian woke to Raelynn stroking
his cheek and calling his name. Sebastian dragged his eyes open to see her
leaning over him, dressed in her usual suit for work. Sebastian glanced around
the room. It was still dark. He looked over at the clock. 2:00 am. Damn, they just
went to sleep an hour ago.

"I have to go in to work,"
Raelynn murmured softly.

"You didn't get to sleep much,"
Sebastian grumbled.

She gave him a wry smile. "Murderers
don't care about how long I've slept."

He smiled sleepily. "Do they care
that it's Saturday?"

"Nope." Raelynn chuckled.
"Will you be here when I get back?"

"Depends, I need to apologize to
Jared sometime today."

"Okay. Well, I'll call you when I
get done to see where you are," she said.

  Sebastian nodded and reached up to
cup her face. Raelynn leaned down and kissed him on the lips. He was a fool to
think he could ever go on without her. He wasn't ready to tell her that he
loved her yet, but he accepted that he would eventually. Baby steps.

"I'll see you later, sweet cheeks."
Sebastian smirked, kissing her one more time.

Raelynn smiled and shook her head. Her
smile faded as she looked down at him. "I missed you," she whispered.

Sebastian swallowed hard and nodded.
"I missed you, too, baby."

  After one more kiss, Raelynn left.
Sebastian fell back to sleep, snuggled up with her pillow. It smelled like her,
and he loved how she smelled. He hasn't been able to fall asleep the past few
days. His mind was racing, and he hated not having Raelynn in his arms. He was
used to sleeping with her, and felt completely alone when she wasn't there.