Second Chances (25 page)

It wasn’t what he expected.  He thought he’d feel something for India…something at all.  He thought that he might feel an attraction or hatred or anger or something, but instead…she was just someone that he used to know…someone he had married who was now dating his sister.  He waited for a knot in his stomach, but it never came.  He had expected a tick under his eye, but it didn’t happen.  And he invited them in almost graciously.

His mother was so…proud.  She was beaming.  She was celebrating the holiday with both of her children.  Gavin could read it on her face.  And Hannah…what did he see in her face?  She had walked confidently over to Bitty and India to introduce herself and her children.  India was looking about the home with obvious disdain.

And Hannah…laughed. 

“We’ve been redecorating,” she announced to India without a hint of guilt.  “Gavin told me I could do what I wanted to make myself feel at home.  You know how generous he is.  Oh, and he redid our room in a day.  I am in love with the new carpet.”  She looked over at Gavin and smiled shyly.  “And Gavin, of course.”

“Of course,” India said and looked at Gavin sideways as though she was assessing him for a first time.

Hannah was wonderful.  The rest of the night was more of the same…constant compliments…constantly building him up.  If she really only thought half so well of him, then he was very nearly a god in her eyes.  His heart swelled.  He started to relax.  And with that relaxation was a realization that he was letting his guard down, and then came the serious discussions.

“The family business should have gone to me,” Bitty mentioned.  “I’m the one who loves it.  Gavin is just doing his duty.”

India sighed.  “Gavin is very dutiful.  He does everything he’s supposed to.”

Hannah sipped her wine and tried to change the subject by offering dessert.  Only the women weren’t biting.  It seemed like they had come here with an agenda and they were just getting to it.  She glanced over at Rory and Zoe who were sitting quietly oblivious as they ate generous bowls of chocolate mousse.

Madge walked into the room drying her hands.  “Would you like me to get the girls bathed, ma’am?”  She asked Hannah nervously.

“I’d really appreciate that.  Thank you, Madge.”  And the girls dutifully walked up the stairs on either side of Madge. 

With the room cleared, Gavin grew more nervous, but Hannah reached out to him under the table and squeezed his hand.  “There’s nothing wrong with being a good son,” she said.  And she smiled openly at him.

“Yes, he took over the business after his father passed and married just like he was supposed to,” India said haughtily, “even if his bride had no interest in marrying.”  She raised her glass and took a healthy swallow before setting it back down.  The glass wobbled then settled on the table.

Gavin started to open his mouth, but Hannah interjected.  “We all have made mistakes in our youth.  It’s how we learn.”

“Know what I learned?”  India slurred, the effects of multiple glasses of wine becoming evident.  “I learned if I had only gone to the airport, I would not be a divorcee today!”  She laughed at her joke, but Hannah didn’t understand it.  “He’s afraid of flying!” India explained as she cackled in delight.  “Can you imagine?”

Hannah sensed that if she stuck around, the evening was only going to get messier.  It was obvious that India was performing for her benefit and determined to hurt Gavin.  She gave his hand an extra squeeze.  “If you’ll excuse me, I have stories to read to the girls.  I’ll be down after.”  She leaned in and gave Gavin a warm kiss on the cheek and murmured into his ear, “Just breathe.”  And with that, she headed out of the room and up the stairs.

Staring up the stairs, Gavin marveled at her.  She was…perfect.  How could he have ever thought he’d be able to hurt her?  How had he imagined that she was evil and should be destroyed to punish her entire gender?  In truth, he was the one suffering.  He couldn’t lose her.

They spoke at last after the bath.  By the time she came down stairs, India and Bitty had taken their leave.  Gavin was finally breathing again.  Mrs. Meyers had retired for the evening, complaining of too much excitement.  And Madge had finished complaining about the former Mrs. Meyers and decided to head home since she would have to work again early the next morning.

“Take the day,” Hannah urged.

“Did Mr. Meyers say that?”  Madge asked.

“No, but it’s just common sense.  You worked all weekend to help us out.  You deserve some time off.  I’ll tell him.”  Without thinking, she headed to the study to discuss it with him.

Madge simply stood there a moment and shook her head after Hannah.  “That girl.  She doesn’t see it…but I do.”  And with a smile she let herself out and locked the door behind her.

“Hey, Gavin,” Hannah began with her usual knock and walk. 

“Yes, dear,” he answered jovially without even looking up from his file.

“I wanted to talk to you.” 

And the conversation started with Madge.  He agreed with her.  Little did she know he wouldn’t deny her anything.  Gavin smiled to himself as the conversation gradually changed.  Hannah wouldn’t take advantage of him anyway.  That gave him a confidence all previous relationships had lacked.  And this wasn’t even a relationship…yet.  If he had his way, it soon would be.  And Gavin was used to getting his way.

“So, you have a fear of flying?” Hannah asked casually as she opened her book to where she had left off the previous night.

His breath caught in his throat a moment.  Then he remembered…this was Hannah.  She would never laugh at him or make him feel silly and insecure.  “My father died in a plane crash,” he said.

“That’s terrible!”  Hannah exclaimed, genuinely upset.

“Planes have always made me uneasy.  I never had a lot of confidence in the physics behind their success.  And I had even less confidence in the people I’ve seen hired to maintain these planes.”  He shook his head.  “So, ever since that crash, I have opted to drive everywhere, or be driven.”

“How’s your mechanic?”  Hannah asked seriously.

Gavin smiled at her.  “I think we can both agree that a motor dying on a car on the highway is a far cry from an engine dying on a plane 30,000 feet up.”

“You do have a point there, chief.”  She laughed.  “And I guess this means you’ll never whisk me off to the Bahamas for some business meeting?  We’ll never hop the red eye to London for breakfast?”  She was joking with him. 

He liked it.  And yet for Gavin, it made the wheels turn in his head.  Suddenly, he knew just what to do.

Of course, Hannah had one last question.  And that question made him rethink everything…his entire life…all his choices…everything that had brought him to where he was.  He hadn’t thought about any of that for so long.  It was an innocent question.

“You didn’t want the family business?  What did you want to be when you grew up?”

He shrugged.  “A firefighter.  Didn’t all little boys?”  And he turned his attention back to his work to signal that he was done talking.

Hannah tipped her head to study him for a moment.  She knew when she was being put off.  She also knew when not to push things.  And Gavin had spent most of the day at his breaking point.  He needed some time to heal before further pressed.  She would snuggle him really well as he slept.  He had done so much for her.  And all she could do in return was support him, help him heal, and teach him to be happy.  She finally felt like she was making progress.

 

 

Gavin had left for work extra early without speaking to Hannah or the girls, without joining them for breakfast, without even saying his goodbyes.  He had much on his mind.  In fact, he had so much on his mind; he forgot that he was supposed to bring his mother to the airport. 

“I’ll call him, dear,” Mrs. Meyers said after she finished her first cup of coffee and everyone realized he was gone.

“I can take you to the airport.  I do love to make his life easier.”  She laughed as she sent the girls upstairs to brush their teeth.  “We just have to drop the girls off at their pre-school first.”

Soon they were on the road chatting like old friends.  And by the time Hannah dropped Mrs. Meyers off at the airport; she hugged her and sincerely meant it when she told her to visit again soon, that she would be missed.  For the first time that she could remember, Mrs. Meyers flew home with a smile on her face.

Gavin was smiling when he walked in the door that evening.  He walked directly over to Hannah, who was sitting in the keeping room working on her laptop.  He leaned low and planted a kiss on her neck. 

“You smell great,” he murmured.

Hannah laughed.  “Thank you, but since your mother flew home today, you don’t have to do that any more.”

He stood up and froze.  “Oh, no.”  The disappointment in his voice was obvious, but Hannah misread the situation completely.

“Don’t worry.  I had time to get her to the airport.  The girls made it to pre-school.  And everyone is happy.”  She focused again on the site she was working on.  It was important that she keep listing items for sale and building her bank account.  While she loved living here, she knew it wouldn’t last forever.  Nothing lasts forever.

Without another word, Gavin started to walk away.  He had so much to consider.  Now he had no excuse for sleeping with Hannah.  He had no excuse for kissing her, for holding her hand, for showing her the affection he longed to give her.  He sighed heavily.  His mother had left without even saying goodbye.

“Well, you didn’t say goodbye before you left either,” his mother snapped when he confronted her by phone shortly before dinner.

“Yes, but I didn’t say goodbye so you couldn’t leave.”  He bit his lip at the lie.  And sure enough his mother caught it.

“You forgot all about me.  Admit it.  What could be more important than your mother?  I’m not getting any younger, you know.  My next visit could be my last…”  She sighed.

“Oh, honestly, mother.  You will probably outlive me.  And if you must know, I’m planning a trip with Hannah and the girls.”  Gavin was dying to tell someone.  And with his mother all the way in Florida, she was his safest bet.

“Really.  Where to?”  She asked. 

His mother was excited.  He could tell because he heard the chair creak.  She was leaning forward.  “You are pleased?”

“Oh, someone is at the door.  Talk to you soon, dear.” 

And with that, she hung up, leaving Gavin to wonder why she couldn’t just admit to being happy or proud or anything positive.  It had always been that way, for as long as he could remember…but before he could give it too much thought, Hannah leaned into the room. 

“Dinner is served, chief.”  She smiled at him before exiting.

Before he could help himself, Gavin had smiled back.  What the hell.  He didn’t even know who he was any more.  And yet the more time he spent with Hannah, the more he was finding out.

A call that came in from his travel agent after dinner had Gavin scurrying to the office instead of helping Hannah in the kitchen like he usually did.  He mouthed that he was sorry as he left.  And Hannah didn’t seem the least bit bothered by his abrupt departure.

The girls, however, were bothered by his late arrival as they were reading after their bath that evening.  Rory actually sighed.  He was taken aback at her reaction, but continued into the room to sit in his usual spot under Zoe on the bed.

Smirking over the entire incident as everyone settled in, Hannah asked Rory, “Where did I leave off?”

“With the fox!” Rory said excitedly
, her displeasure instantly forgotten.

“Ah, yes,” she said.
  “‘One only understands the things that one tames,’ said the fox.”  Hannah read, but as she did, she glanced up at Gavin, willing him to understand.

As happened so frequently after Hannah finished reading for the night, Gavin walked down the stairs in a stupor, mulling over the message to be gleaned from the story that evening.
  It was obvious, he sighed.  Hannah had tamed him.  He would forever be different because she had been in his life.  And that wouldn’t be a bad thing, unless at some point she was no longer in his life.  He shivered some at that thought before entering the study.

Though they hadn’t been living together for long, he was already struggling to remember what life was like before her.  Sure, she was headstrong and drove him crazy.  It was nice in a way.  At least he was feeling again.  And maybe the trip would help cement the bond for Hannah.  He could understand why she was hesitant to accept he might have feelings for her.  He could even understand why it might take her a long time to even contemplate reciprocating those feelings.  Suddenly, however, he had hope that his life could be better and different.  And all of this was because Hannah had come into it.

When Hannah entered the study after tucking the girls in, she expected to find Gavin behind the desk where he usually was.  Instead, she found him outside, staring off toward the water. 
It was dark enough that she couldn’t see the lake’s edge, but from the sound of the waves lapping against the shore she knew it was still there, close as it always was. 

“Hey,” she called.  “What are you doing way out here?”

Gavin chuckled.  “Come here a moment,” he said with a smile.

It was going to take Hannah some time to get used to a Gavin that was more relaxed and quicker to smile.  At the same time, she liked it very much.  Just what she needed…for Gavin to be any more irresistible.  His mother had left just in the nick of time.  It was all she could do to keep from climbing into him at the end of the every night.  She found their fit was entirely too comfortable.  When they spooned, her bottom slid perfectly into the lap he created as though it was made just for her.  And the way he wrapped his arms around her was so natural so good…it felt like home.  She sighed at the memory.

He heard the sigh.  Was she annoyed with him?  His brows knit together as she walked toward him.  He was already rethinking everything.  Hannah’s reaction was everything.  She could shatter his confidence more thoroughly than any woman before.  Given the woman who raised him and the woman he had married, that was really saying something.

“What brings you out here?  I thought you hated the water,” Hannah commented as she reached his side.

Gavin smoothly slid an arm around her waist and walked her down to the dock.  There was a sailboat there that she had never seen before.  She looked up at him and started to question when he stopped her.  “It belongs to a friend.  I borrowed it for demonstration purposes.”

She looked at him quizzically.  He was already standing on the boat with a confidence that can only come from years of experience.  He held out his hand and she climbed on.

“This is a 27 foot Lancer,” Gavin said.  “I usually prefer Hunters.  Have you ever sailed before?”

Shaking her head, Hannah replied, “Never.”  She inhaled the fresh night air and smiled.  “I’ve always wanted to though.  I’d watch the sailboats from the beach all the time.  They looked so…free.” 

“Funny,” he said.  “I’ve always felt precisely the same way.  I guess I always wanted freedom.”  He motioned for her to sit down and he did the same.  “I learned to sail at one of the camps my father shipped us off to every summer.  When all my friends were busy buying sports cars, I had a truck and a sailboat…and a dream.”

Hannah had been looking around, studying the boat in the moonlight while he spoke, but now, she gave him her full attention.  She could tell this was something big and meaningful, something he didn’t share with maybe anyone.  And here he was sharing it with her.  Her heart was bursting as it raced in her chest.

“I had the truck because I wanted to sail away.  I wanted to live in the Caribbean.  I wanted to teach people to sail, to offer charters for family vacations and business retreats, that kind of thing.  I wanted to be happy.”  He stared wistfully at the water.

“What happened?”  Hannah asked quietly, afraid to break the spell.

He let out a hollow laugh.  “My dream wasn’t big enough for my father.  He hadn’t worked hard to build a company for his son to be a bum.  He couldn’t leave a girl in charge…even if my sister was more interested and devoted.”