Second Ride Cowboy (Second Chance Series) (6 page)

She could understand. In all honesty, she wasn’t the woman she once was. He’d known her as the good-time, free spirit and now she had become a grounded, responsible mother. She knew when to fight and when to let go—and now was the time to back off, at least a little. He wanted space; she’d give it to him. Forcing back the last remnants of tears, she straightened her spine. “Agreed. I will go on living as I did before. As for the McAllister, Ava and I will stay only as long as it takes for you to gain your strength. Not one day later. After that, you will have to decide what kind of father you are.”

CHAPTER SIX

LILA HELD THE large ceramic bowl in the crook of her arm as she beat the brownie batter with an intensity stemming from inner turmoil. Two days had passed since she’d brought Duke back to the McAllister. He’d sank deeper into his depression, wallowing in anger and self-pity. To a certain point, she understood his trauma. On the other hand, her acceptance was thinning. She couldn’t treat him like any other difficult patient. Loving him made this personal.

She reminded herself he could recuperate and still not be the man she fell in love with.

If only she could close her heart from emotion, but denying love would be similar to rejecting the need to breathe. Caring for Duke and breathing sustained her body, they came naturally. Yet, her love for Ava outweighed everything, and if he chose to shun their daughter, Lila would find a way, no matter how hard, to cut the ties.

Giving him time to come to terms with reality was important. How much time, she wasn’t sure. He’d closed himself off in an upstairs guest bedroom, not leaving his bubble of misery. He hadn’t been out on the ranch and she’d thought he would have been anxious in trying to work his

 hands in something he’d loved. The few times she’d seen him, to take him his meals or try to talk to him, he’d refused to look at her, keeping his gaze on the wall or window. Lila had called Dr. Scott with worry, but the woman had told her that his behavior wasn’t uncommon and Lila should remain strong.

Lila blew a tendril of hair as it escaped her ponytail. She wished she could blow Duke’s attitude off as well; however, while he remained a beast, she’d continue to busy herself creating new recipes. The kitchen was like having an adult playground with all shiny, modern appliances and mysterious gadgets. How ironic that Carly had built a chef’s dream kitchen when she’d lived here at the McAllister. Carly hated cooking and had only used the space for two things; the wine rack, which covered one wall, still stocked with expensive bottles, and the spacious cabinets she’d filled with jars of peach jam made with fruit from the grove. There were still a few containers remaining, but Lila had moved most of them into the pantry. When peaches were in season, Lila could go down and pick a basket full of the fresh fruit to make cobblers, pies, sauces, or whatever else she had a desire to create.

She loved this ranch.

Lila glanced out of the window and watched deer grazing along the edge of the woods. Birds sat on a limb of the old oak tree, singing a joyful tune. In the distance, she saw horses galloping along the wooden fence. A few months back, Lila had one of the ranch hands erect a play set and sand box for Ava.

Sadness washed over Lila.

She’d enjoyed living here, although once upon a time she’d never wanted to leave the city. She’d like the fast-paced lifestyle of nice restaurants, entertainment and the close proximity to the hospital. Duke had been her complete opposite. She couldn’t see him living anywhere but on a ranch. He was a country man, born and bred. He loved getting his hands dirty. As different as they were, they’d complimented each other.

Love can certainly change a person’s priorities.  

Disappointment churned her stomach. She’d have to consider relocating back into San Antonio or take Carly up on her offer of moving into the small guest cottage at the Swift Wind. Lila could see her and Ava living in the house built away from the main house. Deer roamed every field. Birds sang in every tree. Swings could be built on any plot of land. Yet, she’d grown to consider the McAllister her home.

“You’re getting sappy. Get a grip.” She gave herself a pep talk.

Duke was here and he didn’t want her. Those were the simple facts. And as much as she loved him, she wasn’t quite sure she wanted him at the moment. He did need to find himself again and she couldn’t force him in any direction.

The soft twinkling of Ava’s rattle sounded from where she sat in the highchair. Lila turned her attention to her daughter’s wide, toothless smile, which could light Lila’s day.

“How could anyone resist a bundle of angel dust?” Lila said. Ava was heaven sent. Miracles happen at the very right time and Lila wasn’t ready to give up on her hope for a family. Whether she and Duke were together, they had a sacred bond—a child. “Sometimes a woman must overlook a man’s stubborn ways, Ava dear,” Lila said. Ava responded with a giggle. “In the meantime, a cure for a bad mood is chocolate.”

A knock came on the back door. Through the screen, Lila saw the ranch supervisor waiting on the step. ”Hi, Dillon,” Lila said as she opened the door and held it with her foot. Dillon smiled and tipped his worn hat. If Lila wasn’t already smitten with another cowboy, she may have taken

pleasure in Dillon’s wide grin, bright blue eyes and charm. She guessed he was about her age, maybe a few years younger, and single. He’d once told her he’d worked all of his life on a ranch and had never met anyone that interested him more than the horses he cared for.   

He slid his Stetson off and held it against his chest. “I’m sorry to bother you, ma’am, but I’ve got a shipment of rock for the driveway. I need a signature for payment.”

Lila had little to do with, or knowledge of, the business part of the ranch. “Did Chance approve the order?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Then you should be able to sign as supervisor,” she said.

He blinked and swept a hand through his thick hair. “Well, I thought it’d be best if I asked Duke to sign, considering he’s the one running the show now.”

If only that were true.
Lila sighed. “That’s very respectful of you. You should continue with your duties until Duke speaks to you personally about his expectations.”

He nodded. “Okay. Again, I’m sorry I bothered you, Ms. Sinclaire.”

“No worries. For the record, please call me Lila. We’re all on a first name basis around here.”

“Sure thing, Ms.—I mean, Lila.” One last smile and he was gone.

Lila moved her foot and the door swung shut. She glanced down at the thin dough in the bowl and shook her head in frustration. The mix had been whipped into submission and she doubted it’d make a moist, tender brownie. She poured the contents into an oiled pan and stuck it into the oven just as her cell rang. Grabbing the towel from the counter top, she wiped her hands as she rushed to grab the call.

“Hello?”

“Hello, hun. I see you’re still alive. Question though, is Duke?”

Hearing Carly’s friendly voice, Lila smiled.  “I’ll never tell.”

“That bad?”

Carly of all people understood, Lila knew. Friends since childhood, they were more like sisters instead of best friends. “That bad you ask? Worse. He’s been holed up in his bedroom since he arrived. He refused to take the master bedroom, although I offered to move out into another bedroom. He even had the audacity to tell me it was fitting since I was master minding his life.”

Carly chuckled. “That’s Duke. Sarcasm is his middle name, but try to remember his side in this.”

“Yes, I know. The scars, the sudden responsibility of being a father, the reality life has moved on…”

“And losing a woman he loved dearly,” Carly added.

“He hasn’t lost me.”

“Yeah?” Doubt corroded Carly’s voice. “You told me yourself you weren’t sure how to speak to him when you saw him awake.”

“True, but how does one speak to a man who had been in a coma for eighteen months?”

“Good question. No one is saying you should have jumped right back into the saddle, but I’m pointing out that for Duke it must be as awkward. I don’t need to remind you he has more pride than anyone I know, even more than Chance. Duke doesn’t want you with him for pity’s sake.”

“Is that what Duke told Chance?” she asked.

“In a roundabout way. By the way, Chance said he was sorry for telling Duke about the engagement. Chance heard our conversation and assumed, and he thought he was helping out his friend, not make him pissed off at the world.”

Lila tightened her grip on the plastic. “You tell Chance I owe him one.”

Carly’s exhale of breath rattled on the other end. “You tell him yourself. How about over dinner tomorrow night?”

Lila scrunched her eyebrows together. “How am I supposed to convince Duke to leave his man cave, let alone the house?”

“That’s why we will come there. You like to cook, and you know I hate even the thought. It’ll be like old times.” Carly laughed.

“Yeah.” She took a minute to think and then sighed. “You’re right. I think having you, Chance, and the baby here will be good. Not only for Duke, but for me as well. And Ava has missed Chancelor. They are after all future husband and wife.”

“He’s growing like a weed and he’s all over the place. Once my stomach gets bigger with baby I don’t think I’ll be able to keep up. Anyway, I’m looking forward to seeing y’all.”

“How is the pregnancy coming? Anymore trouble with your blood pressure being high?” Lila asked.

“Bp is back to normal, but I’ve dilated another centimeter. Doctor Harrington wants this baby to cook a few more weeks before she can induce me.”

Lila heard the worry in her friend’s voice. “And she also told you to get lots of rest, right?”

“Yes, she did. And I’m trying, I really am,” Carly said.

“Any chance Thelma will be back soon to help out?”

“I’m afraid not. I spoke to her yesterday and it seems her doctor has confined her to bed rest for another month because her broken bone isn’t healing as fast as he’d like.”

“Have you spoken to Chance about hiring another housekeeper, at least for the time being?” 

“It’s very hard, Lila. Thelma has been in this family for years. She changed Chance’s diapers when he was a baby. I can’t suggest we hire someone else. After all, a lot of women have to take care of a child and household without a housekeeper.”

Lila groaned. She knew it wouldn’t do any good to argue with Carly. “If you need anything, I’m only a phone call away.”

“I know you are, but it seems you have your work cut out for you, too.”

“I will make time. And we’ll talk more during dinner, okay?” Lila said. “Be here at seven then?”

“See you then, hun.”

They clicked off the phone and Lila put a sleepy Ava down for a nap in her crib. She was asleep the minute her head hit the pillow. Lila closed the door on her way out.

Lila took several deep breaths as she headed down the hallway to the closed door of Duke’s bedroom. She pressed her ear close and listened. It was quiet. She tapped her knuckles lightly. No answer.

“Duke?” She called. Still nothing. Worry nestled its way into the pit of her stomach. She knocked again, louder.

Turning the knob, it was unlocked. Pushing aside the uncertainty of entering uninvited, she continued into the room. After all, she was in charge of his care. “Duke?”

The door to the bathroom was closed and she could hear the shower running. Inhaling deeply, she caught a scent of coconut and leather.
Duke’s smell
. She laid a hand on her belly, hoping to silence the butterflies.

Dirty dishes and soda bottles littered the nightstand. The bed was unmade and his sheets were wrinkled. An impression of his head still marked the pillow. She turned and on the dresser she spotted the silver horse belt buckle he’d won in the rodeo rough stock division. She ran the tip of her finger along the shiny metal, remembering the story he’d told her. He’d started in the rodeo in his early twenties, roping and riding had been his profession. He’d been brave and known for his riding skills. During one event, he was thrown from a bull into a fence, sending

him to the hospital where he’d stayed for a week. He’d said those were the longest days of his life and he’d done a lot of soul searching, eventually deciding to hang up his lasso. From there, he’d come home to Shelby. Chance’s father offered him a job. Duke had said it wasn’t the accident that had made him turn his cheek on the rodeo, but destiny had caught up to him.