Secrets of My Hollywood Life (13 page)

PRINCESSLEIA25: What did U say?

FUTUREPREZ: I'm ur mom.

PRINCESSLEIA25: LOL

FUTUREPREZ: Just call!

PRINCESSLEIA25: Do me a favor --call Laney. Sky

said she's auditioning 4 Hutch 2.

FUTUREPREZ: No way. RU serious?

PRINCESSLEIA25: Sadly yes.

FUTUREPREZ: OK, I'm dialing now ...

I hear Tom clear his throat. "Sorry," I whisper to him. "My mom. I've got to call her. I'll be right back." I tiptoe out of the room, hoping no one but Melli and Tom notices I'm gone. When I swing through the double door to the kitchen, I can see this is the right place to make a call. The chef is busy barking orders at assistants readying fruit tarts and freshly stuffed éclairs while the waitstaff keep running in and out with trays of fried shrimp, mini filet mignons on toast, and crab cakes.

No one will hear me make a phone call in here. I look around once more, making sure Sky is nowhere to be seen, and dial.

"HELLO?" Someone yells. Loud music is pumping in the background.

"Hey, it's, uh, Rachel," I say, almost forgetting who I am at the moment. "I was in the loo."

"Can you hear me?" Beth yells. "I'm with Liz and Allison." Liz. Why is she letting Beth call me when she knows where I am?

"Yeah, I can hear you." I glance at the door. So far so good. "Is something wrong? My mum said it was an emergency."

"You missed it," Beth screeches. "Austin and Lori had a HUGE fight and they broke up!"

"What?" I'm shell-shocked. I just saw him an hour ago, though it seems like it was on a different planet. "Why?"

"Because of YOU," she bellows. I hear Liz hoot in the background, "Go Rach!" "He was yelling at her about throwing her drink on you or something and he said he'd had enough with her games and jealousy and that it was OVER. Lori threw a plate of nachos at him and said the party was officially finished. She's kicking everybody out right now. Can you believe it? Austin broke up with Lori over you!"

I can't actually. This is crazy! There's going to be no dealing with Lori now. But wait, does that mean Austin's single?
What am I thinking?
I should be concentrating on getting the Hutch Adams part.

A waiter behind me drops a platter and it crashes to the floor. The chef closest to me starts cursing at him in French. Hmm, maybe he can help me with my French homework. I have a quiz tomorrow morning.

"What was that?" Beth asks.

"I dropped the bloody phone," I blurt nervously. "It's late. I should probably go...."

"Yeah, terrible curfew you have," Beth says, reminding me of the excuse I used to leave the party early. "Don't worry. Call me tomorrow. I'll fill you in on the rest."

I hang up the phone. A waiter drops another plate of chocolate eclairs and strawberries, and I don't even flinch. I've got to call Liz when I get out of here and find out more about Austin and Lori and tell her about Sky and Hutch Adams.

I walk towards the kitchen doors and they swing forward, almost smacking me in the face. When they swing back again, I see her immediately. It's Sky, and she's quickly walking away from the kitchen.

Oh God. Did she hear me?

Twelve:
A Study Date

At school on Monday morning, I'm greeted with not one, but two reasons for a migraine. First off, my seat in Mr. Klein's class is directly behind Lori, who probably wants to shoot venom at me this morning after her breakup with Austin. The second problem is what Lori's holding in her perfectly manicured hand. The minute I quietly sit down, I see the
Sizzling Celebs
cover with a big picture of me at the
Off-Key
premiere. Next to the photo is a caption in big white letters:

WHY IS KAITLIN BURKE HIDING?

WITH
FAMILY AFFAIR
ON HIATUS, SHOULDN'T TV'S GOLDEN GIRL BE OUT HAVING FUN? THE REAL REASON SHE'S MISSING FROM THE HOLLYWOOD SCENE ON PAGE TEN!

Immediately, I feel dizzy. HAS SOMEONE FOUND OUT WHAT I'M DOING?? When Liz arrives a few seconds after me, she can't miss the look on my face.

"What is it?" she mouths, and plops her books down on the table next to me. I motion to Lori. Liz spots the magazine cover right away and gives me a wink.

"Hey, Lori," Liz says cheerily.

Lori doesn't bother looking up. She keeps flipping through the magazine. "Yes, I'm fine,
no
Austin didn't dump me, I dumped him, okay?" she snaps. "End of story." Then she looks up and realizes it's Liz. "Oh.
It's you.
What do you want?"

"Actually, I was just wondering about the new issue of
Sizzling Celebs,"
Liz says. Today she's wearing this funny lavender tee that says HUGS NOT DRUGS in big letters. It looks cute with the frayed denim skirt and gold sequined sandals she's got on. "Mine didn't come yet."

"Oh." Lori casually flips her hair to the side. Ever since I was banned from my walk-in closet to play Rachel, I'm obsessed with what everyone around me has on. Lori's black Dior cami and Blue Cult jeans are hot enough to make me drool. I, on the other hand, am stuck wearing a pale yellow V-neck tee from Discount World and a hand-me-down plaid skirt from Nadine, which itches immensely.

"I can't be bothered with subscriptions," Lori says off-handedly. "Our chauffeur picks it up for me the morning it hits newsstands. I like to be the first to know everything."

I roll my eyes at Liz, but she ignores me. "That's cool. So what's the story on Kaitlin Burke?" Liz points to the cover.

Lori snorts. "She's, like, totally destroying her career." I dig my nails into my horrible synthetic skirt to keep from screaming.

"How?" Liz asks, leaning in closer for the answer.

"Sizzling Celebs
says she's totally trying to destroy Sky Mackenzie and Trevor Wainright's relationship," Lori explains. "Apparently she hasn't gotten Trevor away from Sky, so she's become a complete recluse. She hasn't been going to parties or anything."

I stifle a groan. But I'm also kind of fascinated. It's weird to watch malicious rumors get spread about me right in front of my face.

"Wow," Liz says, acting all amused.

"Yep, Kaitlin Burke is losing her mind," Lori concludes. "The story even says that Kaitlin is thinking of quitting acting because she can't compete with Sky for roles. Sky is up for the same movie as Kaitlin."

I can feel my heart beating out of my chest. SKY! She's ruining my life even when she's not in it! Wait till I get hold of Laney.

"I hope they kill Kaitlin's character off
Family Affair,"
Lori adds. "She's not half as talented as Sky."

That does it.

"You can't believe everything you read!" I blurt out.

Lori turns and looks at me in disdain. "No one
asked you,"
she hisses. Liz looks at me like I'm nuts. Lori starts to say something else, but she's interrupted by Mr. Klein.

"Rachel? Mrs. Pearson would like to see you in her office pronto," he says, hanging up the classroom phone on the wall. "The rest of you turn to chapter seven of your
History Today
textbook."

Lori looks at me smugly, like she knows I'm in big trouble.

When I reach Principal P's office, she's standing in the doorway. "Rachel, you have a phone call. It's your mother," she whispers loudly and winks. "You can take it in my office." Principal P quickly ushers me in the room and shuts the door behind us. I look at her questioningly and pick up the phone.

"Hello, this is Rachel," I say, since I still don't know who I'm talking to.

"KAITLIN? IT'S LANEY. WHAT TOOK YOU SO LONG? I HAVE REESE ON HOLD." This is an old Laney trick to make people jump, and I know better than to believe her.

"Oh hi, Laney," I say. Principal P hovers nearby, pretending to sort through her mail. "Sorry. I was in class two buildings away. What's up?"

"WE HAVE A SERIOUS CRISIS ON OUR HANDS!" Laney yells. I hear cars whizzing by in the background. She must be driving again. I hope she's using the hands-free headset I bought her. "I HAVE YOUR MOTHER AND NA-DINE ON THE LINE TOO."

"I know, I saw the
Sizzling Celebs
cover," I say.

"Sizzling Celebs
cover? What
Sizzling Celebs
cover?" My mother cries. "Ours didn't come in the mail yet!"

"CALM DOWN, MEG," Laney orders. "IT'S JUST MORE TABLOID RUBBISH. I HAVE A CALL IN TO THEIR EDITOR-IN-CHIEF ABOUT THEIR SOURCES. I'M THREATENING TO SUE!"

"Good!" Mom barks.

"Laney? Could you talk quieter? You're yelling in my ear," Nadine complains.

"Kaitlin, I called this phone conference to talk about the Sizzling Sixteen list," Laney says, lowering her voice without acknowledging Nadine.
"Total Teen
told me that Sky's mother won't allow her to be on the list if you're featured before Sky in the issue. Well, I turned around and told them that you are the bigger star and if you're not placed first then YOU DON'T APPEAR AT ALL!" Uh-oh.

"Kaitlin has to come first. What if it sways Hutch Adams's decision?" Mom's voice hits an anxious high note. "He could pick Sky because Kate-Kate isn't ranked high enough."

The thought makes my head throb even harder. "We've got to do something!" I blurt. I'm surprised at how upset I am about this.

HOLLYWOOD SECRET NUMBER THIRTEEN: Celebrities actually care about being on magazines' "It" lists. They may go on
Oprah
and make fun of being in
People's
"Sexiest Men" issue for the third year in a row, but that's just a front. I guarantee you they called their publicists when that list was being created and told them to make sure they're on it. These lists are an easy way to stay on the public's good side. The magazines run a super flattering photo of you and write a puff piece about how you're more popular than the President and kinder than the Pope.

"Not to worry. I did some research," Nadine soothes. "Based on
Total Teen's
criteria for the Sizzling Sixteen list, Kates should appear first. She's had three more film roles than Sky, and on
FA
this year, Sam's storyline has been juicier."

"GOOD, NADINE," Laney yells, and feverishly honks her horn in celebration. "WE'LL SHOW THEM!"

"Have we heard anything from Hutch's people yet?" Nadine voices what I'm thinking.

"I have a call in to Kaitie-Kat's agent to find out," Mom says. "He told me we should hear something by the end of next week either way."

I think I may throw up. I look at Principal P and smile. She won't take her eyes off me.

"KAITLIN, I HAVE TO GO BACK TO REESE. WE JUST WANTED YOU TO KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON IN CASE ANYBODY ASKS YOU ABOUT THE LIST," Laney shouts. The phone goes dead.

Who's going to ask me about the list at school?

Principal P looks at me hopefully. "Was that about
Family Affair?"
I just stand there staring at the phone in my hand.

"That was Laney and my mom and my assistant." I walk around her desk. Principal P stands in my path to the door.

"I was hoping it was Paige with some scoop about next season." She plays with her hands.

I want to laugh, but don't. To be honest, it's kind of nice that Principal P is such a big fan. I don't seem to have many these days -- in or out of school. "Principal Pearson, the show just ended," I say sweetly. "Even we won't know what's going to happen for a few months."

"I can't wait that long," she groans. "I was on the
Family Affair
message boards last night looking for answers. Does Paige survive the crash? Who is the father of Krystal's baby? Are they going to do a DNA test?" She looks at me hopefully. "You must know
something."

I shrug. "I really don't. The writers are on vacation now just like I am." Principal P frowns. "But I'm sure Paige will survive. Melli just signed another two-year contract with the show." Principal P sighs in relief.

The warning bell rings for fourth period. "I'll tell you what." I inch around her and grab the door. "I'll have lunch with you next week and you can ask me all the
Family Affair
questions you want."